ella
There's a feeling of sadness that washes over me as I sit in the locker room, scrolling on my phone while Morgan braids my hair.
This is it, the last game that I'll ever be playing in high school. The last game I'll ever play with my friends, and the last game I'll play representing Eden Hall.
It's bittersweet to think about, how the last four years of playing for this team have completely changed my life. I went from an eager freshman ready to make an impact to a committed senior, all in the blink of an eye. Even with all of the adversity I've faced, I wouldn't change any of it for the world. It's helped make me who I am today, and I owe this program everything.
Once Morgan finishes my hair, I get up from the bench to let Sadie take my place. It's already hard trying to hold back tears, so I take it upon myself to walk out of the locker room and towards the training room, where Tavia is most definitely setting up her stuff.
"Crazy to think you'll be here for real next year, huh?" she asks as I walk through the door.
"Don't remind me." I respond, hopping up onto one of the exam tables. "I'm not sure I'm ready to let go of Eden Hall yet."
"That may be." she answers with a shrug, grabbing the tape and ace bandages. "But you're going to have to, whether you like it or not. Besides, you get to play in this stadium for the next four years. Might as well get used to it now."
Instead of answering, I just nod and let her start doing her job. If I want any shot at playing well in this final, I'm going to need my ankle to be wrapped and ready to go. I've got my third state championship on the line, and I'm not taking any risks. It doesn't matter that I've already won two of them, that's in the past and they mean nothing if we don't win tonight.
As Tavia continues her wrapping job, I take the moment to become familiar with my surroundings. This training room, that locker room, and the field that I'll be stepping onto soon enough hold four years of future memories, all of which begin after tonight. While I'm excited for them to begin, I'm going to savor every moment of high school soccer I have left.
When Tavia is done wrapping my ankle, I hop off the table and start for the door. All of a sudden, I feel a hand on my shoulder and I'm turned around so that I'm facing her. "Go get 'em kid. You were destined for this."
I immediately throw my arms around her and give her the biggest hug I can. She's been through it all with me, and I have no idea how I'm supposed to leave her too. Don't get me wrong, I'm super excited to be in my third straight state final. But with all of this excitement comes sadness, because I know I won't have this opportunity ever again.
I guess that's what being a senior means, even though I'm well aware of it. It doesn't make it any easier though, so like Tavia said... I might as well get used to it now.
~
Surprisingly enough, I have absolutely no nerves as I walk with the team onto the field. I'm not sure if this calmness is something to be afraid of, but I'm refusing to let it bother me regardless. Worrying about the little things will end up causing me to make a game-costing mistake, so it's better that I just focus on playing well and nothing else.
I throw my bag down on the bench and use that moment to scan the crowd. Almost everyone from our school is here, in a sea of red, white, black, and gold. Within seconds, I find our friends. They're all packed at the front row, decked out in different "Eden Hall Girls Soccer" clothing from over the past four years... or at least most of them are.
Adam is the only one who sticks out to me, mainly because he's wearing his letterman jacket with just a plain black t-shirt underneath. I can't tell if he looks miserable because he doesn't want to be here, or because something else is going on, but I decide to look away. I don't think I want to find out, because it's not like I could anyway. That look he gave me after he fought Alex last week told me all I need to know about where we stand.
Speaking of Alex, he looks so happy to be here. He's with a bunch of his friends, and he's the only one dressed in Eden Hall gear. The rest of his friends are in the familiar green and white of Hill-Murray, our opponents once again. Although his friends are most definitely giving him crap for not supporting his school, it makes me feel warm inside to know that he's here for me.
Now that I've had a moment of peace, it's time to get to work. Warmups, pre-game traditions, and Coach Hofmann's speech go by in a flash, and I'm taking my spot on the field before I've had a second to breathe. The whistle blows, and off we go.
This is it. Everything I've worked for in my high school career all comes down to this moment.
The play is back and forth for most of the first half, but it all falls apart when they score two quick goals right before halftime. We walk back into the locker room defeated, and it's honestly hard to see how we're going to come back from this. It's difficult enough to tie a game when you're down a goal... but two? Almost impossible.
"We're not losing this game." I think out loud, quickly realizing I interrupted Coach's speech.
"What was that Ella?"
"We're not losing this game." I repeat, standing up. "We've come too far to let it all go to waste. We've worked too hard to give up our title to our biggest rival. We've come too far to let someone else have what's been ours for the past two years, and we've worked way too hard to not keep making history. We deserve to threepeat, and we deserve to win this game. One goal at a time, guys. We got this. I believe in us to do it, so that leaves me with one question. Do you?"
I look over to Coach, ready to apologize for cutting him off. But to my surprise, he looks prouder than I've ever seen him. He knows we can do it, and he knows now that we have the leaders in order to do it. All we have to do is believe in ourselves.
When we walk out for the second half, the crowd looks just as nervous as I feel. Who knows if we'll actually be able to pull off a miracle? My speech could end up being all for nothing, but I know that it'll be for something. Because I know that we're going to make damn sure this game turns around.
Once the whistle blows, I snap into game mode. Each ball that comes my way, I'm clearing without a second thought. Every free kick given to us, I'm putting in a perfect place for someone's head or foot to give us a chance at scoring. Every battle for the ball is with a purpose, the ultimate prize on the line.
Frustration sinks in as the minutes go on, because no one is converting any of the opportunities I'm giving them. However, everything finally starts to change with five minutes to go. And it couldn't have come at a better time.
Sadie gets tripped in the box, which the ref immediately calls. Her PK goal makes the score 2-1, which starts to turn the momentum in our direction. Right off the kickoff, Addison blocks a pass and sprints down the field, putting a shot past their goalie to tie the game. Within a minute, the score is tied at two.
Everything has changed now. The momentum is fully on our side now, the crowd is going wild, and we've found belief in ourselves. Two goals within a minute is basically unheard of in soccer, and the fact that we've just done it is helping us realize that we can do anything we set our mind to. Not only that, but we are unstoppable when we work together.
The next four minutes are the hardest four minutes of my life. Everyone on the field is battling their hardest to get the go-ahead goal, and as the seconds tick down, we're all thinking about overtime. That is until Blayne gets tripped right outside the box with three seconds left.
The clock stops, and Coach immediately calls for me to take the kick. Although there is so much noise around me, all I can hear is my own thoughts. That's something Miguel taught me from an early age; if you don't block out the noise and focus on the choice you want to make in an important moment, fate is going to choose for you.
I take a deep breath and jog up to the ball, going over every single time Miguel has reminded me to focus on my choice. I pick it up and throw it back down, watching the backwards spin as it falls. I then adjust it to how I want it, and wait for the ref to blow his whistle. When he finally does, I raise my arm and take a deep breath.
As I strike the ball, I hear the horn sound to signal the end of the game. I watch as the ball soars through the air, cleanly hitting the back of the net. And then... pure chaos breaks out.
My whole team runs towards me as I hold my hands up in the air, smiling up at the sky. I feel my grandma's presence for a quick second, and then I'm tackled to the ground by my friends. All I can hear are the screams, laughs, cries, and pants of my teammates, evidence of the relief we all feel. This was a complete team effort, and this wouldn't have happened if we didn't work together.
After we celebrated with the plaque and congratulated Hill-Murray on their season, we're released to our loved ones. The first person I run to is Alex, who easily catches me as I jump into his arms. "That was fucking insane. I'm so proud of you."
I pull away from the hug to look down at him, and his smile is just as big as mine. Before I can stop myself, I'm leaning down to kiss him. I don't really care who's around, because I'm on top of the world right now. I just won my third straight state championship and have someone who treats me the way I'm supposed to be treated.
He finally puts me down, but doesn't break the kiss. When I finally pull away, I bury my head in his chest and hold him tight. "Thank you for being here. It means more than you know."
"Hey." he says, tilting my face up so that I'm looking at him. "Anything for you. Now, go enjoy yourself champion. You deserve it."
I give him one more kiss before running over to my family, who are all equally as excited as I am. When I finally leave them, I run to Sadie and Morgan next. I jump on their backs to let them know I'm there, and they laugh at the level of energy I still have. What can I say? I just won my third straight state title, at my future college field. I'm on top of the freakin' world right now.
I finally calm down after a few more seconds, and I give hugs to all of the Ducks who are there. I thank them all for coming, and stay to talk to them for a few minutes. When I eventually turn to leave, I bump into the one person I wasn't prepared to see.
"Hey!" I start, giving him my best smile. "Sorry, I didn't see you there. Thanks for-"
"Mhm, yup." he interrupts, not even trying to hide his anger. "Congrats."
Before I can get another word in, he walks past me and towards our friends. His mood immediately changes, and there's a real smile on his face as he jokes around with them. I know it shouldn't be bothering me, but seeing that makes me more upset than I've been in a while. I understand why he's upset with me, but I didn't think he'd shut me out completely.
Today was supposed to be the best day of senior year so far, but what just happened ruined it for me. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Get my best friend back, or lose him all together? And more importantly, how the hell am I supposed to choose between the two?
*a/n*
i hate the way i ended this i'm sorry. also don't hate me for the drama please i swear it'll end happy and i won't break that promise. but school sucks and it's hard. that's all i've got see you soon love ya