'Oh, I choose you to fill your void, yeah
Oh, I choose you to fill you up, to fill you up, hey'
Fill The Void by The Weeknd, Lily-Rose Deep and Ramsey
A/N: Listen to this song (It's a must❕😭) while reading this chapter.
Y/N'S POV
Weeks passed so fast since I had a proper conversation with Eunwoo. I spent the past two weeks isolating myself from everyone except Jin.
When Jimin told me that he came back from Italy I was stunned, Mr. Kim surprised us without informing any of his friends not even his brother. Taehyung wasn't expecting that. I was so exited to finally see him after five years.
The only thing that broke me was his situation with Samara, ever since he knew that she started dating another man he decided not to inform her that he came back.
So we kept that a secret from her.
He seemed so broken, but we can't even blame Samara for that.
Love is unfair, you can love a person all you want but the universe will decide to stand against you. It's really hard to have a real thing in this generation.
Some will try to find the typical excuse saying that "love doesn't exist", trying to act all heartless to avoid from being heartbroken. It's a way of protecting their heart.
Others find it hard to stay committed. They don't take the relationship seriously.They just be with someone to fill the void. They just be in a relationship so they won't feel lonely.
And some are unlucky, they love the hardest but the feeling isn't mutual. They try hard to make them love them, losing themselves in the process. And they get hurt at the end.
"Fuck" I breathed out, trying my best to hold back my tears. The last one reminded me of myself.
'Get your shit together Y/n!' I warned myself, shifting my eyes towards the files I was supposed to arrange.
I hate the fact that he's ignoring me as if he didn't have me in his bed weeks ago. He's been acting all professional for the past two weeks. Why did I even fall for him? Why? Despite knowing that he would never be able to love me.
Whenever we had an encounter he acts cold towards me, he wouldn't even look at me. He's close but he feels so distant.
Maybe I was foolish to think that he might change for me. I chuckled bitterly. I fell for his sweet gestures, thinking that I might be special for him.
He's right, I should stop being delusional.
"Is he inside?" a familiar voice pulled me out of my thoughts. I looked up at the owner of the soft voice just to witness Lilin staring at me.
'Fuck, I don't want to see you with him'
"Yes" I gave her a weak smile, I have to push my feelings aside and act professional.
Lilin smiled at me before she made her way towards Eunwoo's cabin, my eyes followed her as she walked, swaying her hair. I hate to be the jealous type but I don't want to see them together.
It makes me so insecure, she makes me insecure.
She was literally a goddess compared to me. She was tall, curvy with beautiful blonde hair. She's probably any man's dream.
My eyes followed Lilin until she made her way inside his office, closing the door.
I felt my heart dropping as the door closed.
God, I'm so insecure.
LATER THAT DAY
SAMARA'S POV
"Good night Joon" I chuckled, ending the call. Today was exactly like the other days, I was drained and I wanted to sleep so bad.
My neck was hurting so bad and my eyes were burning.
'What a day, ugh!'
As a treat for myself I decided to pass by my favorite dessert shop in town. It was supposed to be our place. Me and Jin's. When he left I started coming more often.
They have the best cinnamon rolls and cream puffs.
The past few weeks were the amazing moments of my life, it's feels like I'm healing from the heartbreak. I still have flashbacks of him but I believe it will fade eventually.
Namjoon is an angel who came to rescue me.
It's not like he healed me, but his presence is enough to make me forget all the mess that's happening in my chaotic life. Meeting him was one of the best things that happened in my life.
I love how he respects my boundaries, how he checks up on me every now and then. I love his small gestures, for example whenever he sends a bouquet of flowers to my workplace, his little letters that contain all the compliments of the world.
Damn, how can someone be this perfect?
The sound of raindrops floated in my ears as the little droplets rested at the surface of the car windows. Emerging one by one. I love rain. It's music to my ears and the camomile to my stress.
As soon as I arrived at the dessert shop, I hopped out of my car. I didn't bother to take an umbrella with me since there was a light rain.
I jogged towards the shop as droplets made contact with my face, causing me to giggle in joy. Just like a child playing in the rain. As if I'm reliving the childhood I never had.
I was lost in my own world when I stepped on a slippery surface, my body lost balance and I wobbled. But before my ass could make contact with the cold floor, someone caught me by my waist, pilling me closer.
"Attenta!" I heard a voice, it was too familiar. I know this voice, This voice once used to call my name, this voice once groaned in my ears, this voice argued with me.This voice made me laugh.
[ Attenta (Italian) = Careful]
It can't be.
My eyes met his, the man who prevented me from falling.
It feels like time has frozen, as if the raindrops were falling in slow-motion.
Oh my God, this can't be true.
What's happening?
I stared deep in his dark brown eyes, without saying a word, my body was stiff. I couldn't move. I could feel tears building up in my eyes as my mind tried hard to process everything.
I can't be hallucinating, he's seems so real. He's so vivid.
His beautiful orbs never left mines, he was holding me so close, so tight. As if he's afraid to let me go .
Please don't let it be another dream God, please, I don't wanna wake up and miss him more. My heartbeat was unsteady, I felt like crying.
Why is he not saying something?
"Samara?"
"Seokjin?"
We both uttered in union.
My hands trembled as he finally set me free from his grip, his eyes seemed lost and unstable. I tried my best to hold the tears that were threatening to roll down my cheeks.
"W-hat are you doing here?" I tried to form a sentence. Seokjin tried to take a step forward but I walked backwards motioning him to stop with my palm.
"Don't come near me" I whispered and finally, a tear rolled down my cheek. Jin was looking at me with concern and guilt, he slowly shook his head left to right taking a step closer, causing me to take another step to the back.
"I- said d-on't !" I raised my tone a little bit. I just wanted to disappear from there.
I walked past him,as he kept on calling my name from behind. "Sam!" he shout causing my tears to stream down me cheeks, I need to disappear from this fucking place. My heart was hurting as hell.
Y/N'S POV
"See you at the wedding babes" Lilin shout making her way out of Eunwoo's cabin. The two had been in there for almost two hours. God knows what they were doing.
It was now night time and it was time for me to go. I've worked late compared to the other times and I was exhausted. I stretched like a cat before standing up, but before I was able to step a foot I heard Eunwoo shouting from his office.
"Fuck!!" I heard him shout, followed by a few banging sounds.
What's happening?
I rushed over his office and barged in, I didn't even bother knocking as I was panicking at the moment.
The moment I barged in, Eunwoo's messy state welcomed me. The first buttons of his shirt were open, his hair was messy and the room was filled with the papers he threw on the floor.
Everything about his office was a mess including him.
It reminded me of the day where he shout at me after the meeting we had with Taehyung. My heartbeat increased and I fought the urge to leave him there.
Usually, in times like this my body would only want to run away from this kinda situation, I'm used to hide from people who get aggressive.
But I couldn't leave him like this.
I walked slowly towards where he was standing, he was like a statue, frozen, staring into emptiness. The veins on his forehead were becoming visible as he kept on clenching his jaw, his hands turned into fists. He looked so scared and hurt.
"Eunwoo?" I softly said, reaching out to him. But he didn't move. He seemed to be deep in his own thoughts.
"Hey, look at me" I whispered, using both my hands, making him look at me. Eunwoo's eyes softened when they met mines. He then let out a shaky breath. He seemed so suffocated.
"What's wrong?" I asked him and he shook his head left to right, resting his head against my shoulder and closing his eyes shut.
Eunwoo started taking deep breaths in order to calm himself. His breath tickled my neck and his hands snuck to my waist, pulling me closer.
He then looked up at me, creating a small distance between us.
"Help me forget everything" he whispered, leaning over and connecting our lips.He kissed me passionately as his hand traveled to the back of my head.
My hands rested on his chest, in attempt to push him.
But Eunwoo didn't seem fazed, he kept on kissing me with the same energy. "Eunwoo" I said between the kiss, as my hands applied pressure on his chest.
"We can't do this" I finally breathed out, pushing him, and he looked at me with his usual empty eyes. This time I could see the pain in it.
"You can't just come to me whenever you feel like you should fill your void" I finally said looking up at him. "I don't want you to use me anymore" I whispered as the lump on my throat made it hard for me to talk.
"Please" Eunwoo whispered, resting his forehead on mine, keeping me close. Filling the distance between us once again.
"I don't want to mess around with someone who's not willing to date me Eunwoo. How am I good enough for hookups but not enough when it comes to dating?" I whispered, this man got me questioning my worth.
"We can't keep up like this" I exclaimed, releasing myself from his grip, distancing myself from his addictive touch.
With that being said, I left him behind and rushed to my apartment. I felt so useless. As if I'm just a plaything. As if I'm a punching-bag.
A/N: Hope you guys liked this chapter 🌸 Sorry for any grammar or spelling error.
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Also, I wanna thank those who are voting constantly, Ily 💕😭
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