• Steven's POV •
I was walking back to the kitchen after dropping off food to a table of men playing poker when I heard familiar voices shouting.
Angelina and Jeremiah. Tsk, of course it is.
Jeremiah didn't see me when he stormed out of the room. He walked past me with probably the maddest look I'd ever seen on his face. This girl must be putting him through it.
I hated that things were only seeming to get worse between them. They both wanted their relationship to be different, but were too stupid to do anything about it. I decided to text Dani and ask for advice since we'd already been scheming.
Me: I just heard them fighting in the movie room
Daniii: ugh every time they talk they fight
Me: wat do I do?
Daniii: they need to be forced to get along. u should coax them into a group setting
Me: good idea
~
• June 16th •
• Angelina's POV •
It'd been a few days since I'd last talked to Jeremiah. Every time I saw him now it was a cold shoulder and a blank stare. Somehow with every conversation we had things only seemed to get worse. He hadn't even asked me his prying questions anymore. It was just silence.
It was a Saturday and so since the boys were off, Steven had decided that all of us kids would have a mandatory sleepover on the beach. I didn't oppose since I hadn't hung out with the whole group since Sadie's party.
I was nervous about being around Jeremiah for so long but figured I'd just ignore his presence and hope for the best.
When the sun began to set, we all walked out on the beach with tents, sleeping bags, and loads of snacks. While Jeremiah, Steven and I attempted to create a bonfire, Belly sat on her phone while Conrad lingered around smoking a cigarette.
That boy's lungs can't be doing well.
I'm not one to talk though.
I figured the boys could do on their own with the bonfire and stood to go mess with Conrad.
"Hi, Lina." He gave me a lazy smile as I got closer.
"Hi, Connie, how are you?" I asked him returning a wider smile. We began slowly walking in the opposite direction of the group.
"I'm a little tired but Steven seemed adamant on us all being here so I'm here."
I giggled at his response. "Well, you only have to put up with us for a night."
"Looking forward to it." He leaned into me giving me a slightly shoulder nudge.
"I hope this night stays peaceful." I admitted.
"Why wouldn't it?" He looked back to the group to gage our distance. "Cause of Jere?"
I sighed. "You know how things are."
"Just ignore him if he says anything to you." He suggested.
"Yeah, I know, but it doesn't stop it from getting under my skin."
"If he bothers you, I'll tickle his armpits," Conrad stuck his fingers out and wiggled them around to simulate tickling. "Deal?"
This was a great deal because Jeremiah's the most ticklish in his armpits, a weakness I've utilized many times.
I giggled in response. "Deal."
The boys soon got the bonfire going and Jeremiah had come over to us to inform us.
• Jeremiah's POV •
I watched Conrad whisk Angelina away as he always does. I won't lie and say that wasn't motivation for me to get this fire going so that they had a reason to come back. Steven and I soon got it lit and I seized my opportunity to go break up their little love fest.
I grabbed the marshmallows that I'd gotten for Angelina, knowing she's addicted to the things and walked over to my brother and my Angel.
Except for the fact that she's not mine and most likely will never be.
They were laughing about something and turned when they heard me clear my throat. They stopped walking and turned their attention to me.
"We got the fire going," I informed them awkwardly. "And I brought marshmallows."
Though she kept a straight face the entire time I spoke, I noticed Angelina's eyes light up when she noticed the bag in my hand. What is her deal with these things? They're like crack to her.
"Thanks, man." Conrad said and walked over to pat me on the back and then he dipped to the bonfire.
As I watched him leave I thought about how dumb I was to let him swoop in and take her all those years ago. By stepping out of her life, I opened the door for Conrad to become her best friend and just like throughout my entire life, I'd lost to him.
I looked back to Angelina who stood there fiddling with her necklace. Happy to know she still wears it.
I handed her the bag of marshmallows for the sole purpose of needing an excuse to get closer to her. She reluctantly took them from me, her love for the sweet treat overpowering her anger for me.
Thank god for fucking marshmallows.
There was still a few feet between us but from this distance I could see into her big brown eyes that I always failed to not become encapsulated with. I'll never understand why it is that we can fight and argue and not get along but I will always get lost in those eyes.
Only hers.
There was this tugging in my chest every time I looked into them and I tried to push it away. I tried to ignore it for years and I just couldn't anymore. When I said I was drawn to her, it didn't even begin to capture the feeling I got when within her presence.
She looked so gorgeous under the pink and yellow clouds above as the sun slowly set against the water, I almost lost my breath. Her curly hair brushed through the soft wind and I briefly remembered running my fingers through it when she slept in my room those nights.
As I stared at her I could see that even my peace offering in the form of her favorite snack wasn't enough to let her guard down. She was obviously still on defense.
"If there's something you need to say, say it." She finally broke the silence between us.
I had much to say to her. So many things that I wish I'd said months ago. Fucking years ago. Unresolved emotions and a million apologies ran through my mind before I realized that she probably didn't want any of that.
I wanted to have fun tonight and every time we talked we ended up in an argument. So, I shook my head, letting her know that there wasn't anything I had to say and I walked back in the direction of the bonfire.
We all sat around the fire soaking up it's warmth. I was sat next to Belly while Conrad was sat next to Angel and Steven sat at the head of the fire. A conversation that started about Taylor Swift's last drop turned into Kendrick Lamar's.
I love both artists so I was fully engaged in the conversation. Steven asked our opinions on his last album Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers. To me it was perfection all the way through.
Belly expressed that she loved the passion in the song We Cry Together which I agreed with fully. At first it seemed aggressive but as I continued to listen I began to unravel the meaning behind it and I was amazed.
The song was an argument between two lovers that ends in them making up and having sex at the end. It was toxic, yes, but there was a reason for it. Kendrick was a genius for the way he handled the song.
"Song was mid." Steven commented.
Dimwit.
"It was a work of art," Belly defended to her brother who rolled his eyes. "The passion, the message, the toxicity."
"You're glorifying toxicity now, Bells?" Conrad asked the girl and I noticed her face redden as she gave him a pointed look.
"It's one of my favorites on the album." She said.
"Jeremiah, man, back me up." Steven told me.
I shrugged with a shake of my head. "I'm with Belly on this one."
Steven rolled his eyes once again, that sassy bitch. "You're a loser. Angelina?"
He looked over to the girl that had otherwise been quiet the whole time. It took her a little time to form a response. "I thought it was a lot. I don't think that's how a relationship should be."
"The song isn't supposed to be a depiction of the perfect relationship." Belly defended.
"Yeah, it's toxic for a reason and even then the song isn't supposed to be about their love. It's a commentary on what we as a collective society don't talk about. They can't agree with each other for a reason." I ranted, causing everyone besides Belly to stare at me like I had two heads.
Steven broke the short winded silence.
"I mean they did agree to fuck at the end." He snickered. "It's dumb. How do you go from hating each other to fucking?"
I looked up at Angelina who avoided my gaze as she said, "It's easier than you think."
My eyes narrowed. Not only did she miss the entire point of the song, but she seemed to be talking about us and I didn't like it. I never hated her and I never claimed to. I don't have a single bone in my body capable of hating Angelina Hudson and it sucks that she doesn't feel the same.
"They don't hate each other." I said with an unintentional harshness.
She rolled her eyes at me. "He literally starts the song by saying he's tired of emotional ass ungrateful ass bitches. I don't think that's love."
"It's not hatred either. They're not saying those things about each other. There's a bigger picture than just their relationship."
"If they're not truly saying those things about each other then why are they screaming at each other?"
"Because they're both hurt by it."
"Both?" She scoffed. "He started the entire argument."
"That's just the context given from the song.. we don't know who started it. And if he did start it, there had to be a good reason for why."
"There's no good enough reason to talk like that to someone you 'love' unless you don't actually love them."
I started to become frustrated with her. How is she still not getting it?
"He literally explains how he fucking feels about the things she says to him and she ignores it and starts to put him down more immediately in her first verse. If anything it's her that doesn't love him."
She gets louder. "That's bullshit! She wouldn't be putting up with his nonsense if she didn't actually love him."
"How is he supposed to know she loves him if she only lets her guard down to fuck him?"
I saw her lip quiver for a brief moment before she began full on yelling. "How is she supposed to let her guard down if he's saying terrible things like that to her? Based off of what he says he probably makes her feel like she can't. He makes her feel like he hates her unless they're fucking."
She said the last statement like it was true and it wasn't. It was far from it.
"They were just in the heat of the moment! He meant the things he said but it doesn't stop him from wanting her. It's not about hate. He doesn't hate her!"
"He doesn't?" Her voice cracked and her tone had dropped significantly. The way she asked this question felt directed towards me and not the song.
Angel, how could you ever think that I hate you? How can you not see how much I care about you? Why haven't you seen for the past 4 years?
Steven cleared his throat, breaking me out of my thoughts that I wished to god she could hear.
"You guys know it's just a song right?" He commented.
It felt like the air had been deflated from my chest.
"I don't think they were talking about the song." Belly whispered under her breath while Conrad stared at Angelina in worry.
"You guys will find a way to argue about anything." Steven laughed.
"Yeah, why do you guys hate each other again?" Belly asked.
"Ask Jeremiah." Angelina muttered.
I looked away from her as I shook my head.
"C'mon, we were having so much fun before guys." Steven said to the two of us.
"Y'know what, you're right," Angelina said and looked over to me. She stood and walked to my side of the bonfire. "Temporary truce?"
I was still upset by our conversation but I couldn't tell her no. Not because I gave a shit about this bonfire, but because how could I pass up an opportunity to be good with her again? I shook her hand and she gave me a tight lipped smile.
Soon after the others had began talking about other things, but I stayed quiet too deep in my mind. Still hurt over our conversation.
I looked out into the direction of the house and saw Mom coming out to us. She'd brought us Turkey sandwiches and fruit to enjoy while we were out. We all thanked her and she sat with us for a bit, joining the conversation.
My mom's presence cheered me up and I began conversing with the group again. She was only out for about 20 minutes before she asked me to accompany her back to the house due to her being tired.
"I saw you getting along with Angelina," she said as soon as we were out of earshot.
"Yeah, we made a temporary truce." I told her truthfully.
"Temporary?" She questioned.
"We decided to get along for the sake of everyone else tonight."
She sighed. "You two should be getting along for the sake of your friendship, Jere Bear, don't you miss her?"
"Of course I miss her, Mom."
My mom was one of the only people who knew about how I truly felt about Angelina. She didn't know about the hookups, I spared her the details on that and just told her that we'd had late night conversations.
"Then tell her that." She urged me.
"It's not that easy."
She chuckled. "That's what she said."
I looked over to her in confusion. "You guys talked about me? Mom, have you been holding out?"
Angelina seems to talk to everyone about me except me. Mom had that all knowing smirk on her face and I wondered what it is that she could've said.
"I won't tell what she said," she said firmly. "That's for you and her to talk about."
I respected her keeping things private between them, but I needed to know. What does Angelina say about me when I'm not there? How does she talk about me? What does she think?
"Mom, be honest," I said. "Based off of what she said to you, do you think there's a chance?"
She smiled.
"I know there is."