The way home consisted of Rowan shoving herself between the two front seats to tell Theo repeatedly that he needed to learn how to swim, especially considering we'd soon be traveling again to an island to film. I silently agreed with her, but kept my opinions to myself, knowing the toll the situation had already taken on Theo. He remained quiet on the drive back, but it didn't feel like an uncomfortable one, more of a tired one.
I was tired, too, and I fell asleep about half an hour into the trip. Rowan shook me awake when we pulled up to my apartment, muttering about how nice it must be to fall asleep during car rides. I considered it one of my talents.
"Maisie, do you need a ride tomorrow?" Theo asked, turning to me as I gathered my backpack, clutching it to my stomach.
I hesitated, having momentarily forgotten about the fact my car wouldn't start. "Oh, crap. Um. I think so if you don't mind."
"Would you rather Rowan pick you up?" he asked. "That way there's no chance of anyone seeing us arrive together?"
I went to agree to that plan but stopped myself. "I'd like you to pick me up," I said instead of turning the offer down.
Rowan raised an eyebrow, meeting my gaze through the rear-view mirror. "This is a new development."
"I want to see how I feel," I explained. Would the anxiety remain gone, like how it hadn't appeared back at the lake? I wanted to know if that was a fluke or not. Maybe arriving at work with Theo would be a good test. "Nothing against you though, Rowan."
"Well, I never offered, anyway. Theo volunteered me."
I gave her a wry smile. "Right."
"You usually drive me to work anyway," Theo said, frowning.
"I'm your bodyguard though, not Maisie's. However, I'll still be going with you, so I guess you're coming with me anyway, Maisie." Her usual smirk graced her features.
I nodded, sliding out of the front seat. "Sure."
She climbed out of the back and took my previously occupied spot. "Goodnight. Get some rest."
"Prop your ankle up again," Theo said, leaning over Rowan to see me.
"Right," I responded, slightly distracted by the fact that Theo's hand pressed into Rowan's thigh. His fingers barely sunk into her skin with how muscled her legs were. "It's already feeling better though—"
"Ice it, too," Rowan interjected, giving me a knowing look. "The better care you take of it, the sooner you don't have to wear those crutches."
I lifted up one of the crutches in acknowledgment, smiling a little at their concern. "Got it. See you tomorrow."
Theo didn't drive away as I hobbled my way to my apartment building entrance, carefully climbing up the stairs, the crutches becoming more of a hassle than ever, and my backpack throwing my balance off. I briefly debated about tossing the crutches off into the bushes lining the side of the stairs. Did I really need them? Surely my ankle would be okay...
One of the crutches fell as I struggled to pull out my phone from my back pocket so I could press it against the keypad. I opened the door first, then bent down to pick up the crutch, trying to keep the weight off my ankle, but nearly losing my balance again, my phone slipping from my hand in the process. Gritting my teeth, I went to throw the crutch and then retrieve my phone when my phone was snatched up before I could grab it.
"I'll help you inside," Theo said, righting my crutch for me, and then helping me climb to my feet.
I tried not to feel humiliated by my struggle. "I had it handled."
"Did you?"
"No."
A slight upward tilt appeared on the corner of his lips at my honesty and he opened the door fully for me. I went in, and then Theo took my backpack from me as we made our way up to my apartment door together. I dug my keys out of my backpack and turned to him to thank him.
"Tomorrow we'll drop Rowan off and then I'll bring you home if you want to change and then we'll go straight to see Kaila," he said before I could speak. "Then right to the restaurant. I'm going to change after I'm done filming for the day."
"Sounds good."
"Is there anything you don't like to eat?"
I thought about it. "It might be easier to list the things I do like to eat."
A moment of panic seemed to cross his face. "Really?"
I grinned. "But I can find something to eat wherever we go, I'm sure."
"You're really that picky of an eater?"
"I don't really like that phrase," I said, rolling my eyes a little. "Not liking a food has nothing to do with picking. If I could pick whether I liked something or not, I would choose to like it because growing up as a picky eater was not fun. It was either eat something I didn't like, or nothing at all."
Theo lowered my backpack to the ground next to me. "I never really thought into that phrase before."
"I still like a decent amount of food, so I'll be fine," I assured him.
Theo considered this for a moment. "It's an Italian restaurant."
"I'm guessing now's not a good time to tell you I don't like really pasta or cheese?"
"They have other stuff," he told me. "My parents just thought you'd like Italian food. I'm not sure why that was their first thought."
I smiled a little. "Okay, well, let me know the name of the restaurant and I'll look at the menu and decide what I want beforehand and order it excitedly."
"Excitedly?" he repeated, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah, to show your parents they chose a good place."
He let out a quiet chuckle. "I think they'd appreciate that."
I nodded, pleased with myself and my plan. "I'm going to my play my part flawlessly, Theo, don't worry. They're going to believe we're in love, trust me. I am a pretty good actress."
"Hmm, is that right?" he responded, folding his arms over his chest. "I vaguely remember you barely being able to handle having my face close to yours while we were setting up shots."
I didn't respond right away, heat seeping into my skin as the memory popped up into my head unbidden. Why had he brought that up? And worse, why had he noticed how flustered I was? I thought he'd been mostly focused on Amerie. And also, why did he have such a teasing tone to his voice? He wasn't... He couldn't be... "It was just hot outside!" I blurted. "I wasn't flustered."
"You seem flustered right now."
"It's hot in here!" I argued, pulling out the collar of my shirt. "Dang, I need to tell the management to turn up the A.C."
Theo took a step closer to me and my breath hitched, my back hitting my door. "What Rowan said before had me thinking," he said.
"Rowan says a lot of things," I responded, very aware of how close his body was to mine. I tried to settle my heart as it took off at a frantic pace.
"My parents will never believe us if we're awkward around each other." He moved his hand so that it rested on my door over my shoulder, his warm forearm lightly brushing against my neck as he did so. "So, tell me, do you feel flustered around me?"
"No," I lied, knowing my face was bright red by now. I pressed myself further against the door. "Not at all."
Theo's eyes gleamed with amusement as he leaned even closer.
He knew. He knew, and he was enjoying it. He pressed in closer.
"Okay, okay!" I gave in, placing my palm flat against his chest to keep from coming closer. "I get it. Fine. I do feel a little shy. But it's only because I'd feel shy with anyone that close to me."
"Anyone?" Theo repeated but fell back a step.
"If Rowan pinned me to a wall I'd probably literally have a heart attack," I muttered, adjusting my crutches.
Theo seemed to imagine it for a moment— his gaze flickering to my door again. I just hope he wasn't imagining him and Rowan. "I can only imagine Rowan doing that to someone to make them fear for their life."
I took his momentary distraction to sort myself out, calming my embarrassment. My eyes traveled from Theo's face to his torso. Although his arms were crossed again, his posture was more relaxed now, the opposite of how he'd been back in the cabin. "Are you feeling better now?" I asked.
A wrinkle appeared on his forehead for a split second before he registered what I meant. "Yes. I took your advice and went to see Marco and Jeremy before we left."
"What did you say to Marco?"
"I told him he was really strong."
I snorted, slapping a hand to my face, crushing my crutch to my side. "That was your compliment?"
He turned his head away from me. "It was the best thing I could think of that fit the course of events."
"I'm sure he was still happy with it."
A weary look now crossed Theo's face as his gaze returned to me. "Very. He asked me to arm wrestle."
"And?" I eyed the muscles in Theo's arm that almost bulged out of his shirt.
"I didn't dare rip away what newfound confidence I'd just given him."
I laughed. "You're a good man, Theo."
Another small smile briefly crossed his lips before he nodded at my door. "Alright. If I keep Rowan waiting any longer I'll never hear the end of it. I'll see you in the morning."
"Thanks for helping me up."
"My pleasure," he murmured, handing me my backpack.
We parted after that, and I entered my apartment, immediately throwing my crutches to the ground. I decided to hop around, begrudgingly admitting to myself that walking on it wouldn't help it heal like everyone said. I unpacked my backpack and then went to my computer, logging onto Discord, wanting to see if Levi was on. He'd never responded to my text messages, and it renewed my suspicion.
The coincidence that my Levi was the same Levi as the actor in my movie seemed too unbelievable. I'd been talking to my Levi for over a year about my movie. He would have slipped up at least once if they were the same person, wouldn't he have? But he never talked about what he did for work. He never showed me a photo of himself.
I frowned, staring at his greyed-out name listed under offline. I didn't want to believe he would lie about it, either. I was honest with him about my real identity. But maybe his circumstances were different. It'd be hypocritical of me to question it.
His name suddenly moved to online and I clicked the call button before thinking twice, immediately putting my headset on. "Were you staring at my name or something?" Levi said as soon as he answered.
"No," I lied. "Why? Did you just get on? Me, too. Just a coincidence."
He chuckled. "Did you miss me because we've been away for three days?"
His response, while standard, struck wariness in me. Wasn't that a little flirty? He was never flirty. Not like actor Levi was. "Where did you go?" I ask, belatedly catching the fact he said we've been gone.
"Oh, no, I didn't go anywhere. I just meant we've been apart," he responded easily. "I was just here waiting for you to get back. You're so busy now, Maisie."
"How come you didn't respond to my texts?"
"I did. Didn't I?" I heard his chair squeak as he moved around. "That's weird. They didn't send. I didn't notice until now. Maybe it was because you were in the mountains? Those are some great photos, though."
"Levi, what do you do for a living?" I asked.
He remained silent for a moment. "Why are you asking?"
I distractedly clicked my mouse around my desktop. "Um. Just curious." Doubt inched into my mind again, but about my suspicions this time. It was hard to tell without directly comparing them, but my Levi did sound different from actor Levi...at least, I thought it did. "You never really talk about it."
"It's just not that interesting," he replied. "And when I'm done with work the last thing I want to do is think about it."
I didn't miss how he still didn't tell me what it was. "That's fair."
"It's definitely not as interesting as your job, especially now. Any more used to waking up early?"
"Hell no," I deadpanned, making him laugh. "I debate quitting every day. I'm too used to staying up all night writing and sleeping as long as I want to."
"You'll get used to it," he encouraged. "The days might be long, but it'll be over before you know it, so enjoy it while you can."
"I think we have a longer filming schedule than normal since we have to travel around a bit for location filming."
"At least you'll be able to go to new places! Did anything interesting happen on your trip to the mountains?" he asked. "And did you want to get some games in?"
I didn't want to let the topic of his job drop but also didn't want to push it if he didn't want to talk about it. Pinching my lips together, I logged into League. "I could get some in before I go to bed."
We gamed for a few hours and I told him about everything that had happened at the lake, purposefully leaving out anything about Theo and my interactions. I did mention the fact we had our first official dinner with his parents the following night, but tried to keep the brief. I knew Levi worried about the whole fake dating thing.
"Keep your guard up," he told me. "You won't know if people are snapping photos of you. Even disguised, it's best to be careful."
"Yeah, I will be. Do people really just take pictures of celebrities like that? Like aside from paparazzi and journalists?"
"Depends on the level of fame. But I would say there probably will be more attention on Theo since he just won the Best Actor award, and soon the news about your movie will be released."
I deflated a bit. "That's a good point. Maybe we should try not to meet them in public again after this."
"I doubt there will be paparazzi inside a restaurant. If there are fans though they could try to sneak photos and post them on social media. That's what you need to be wary of."
"Right," I said, glad he was bringing this up because I didn't think about it. "I'll try to face a wall or something."
He swore under his breath as he died in the game, but his tone lightened again as he spoke. "Let me know how it goes."
"I will."
I decided to call it quits after that game, shutting off my computer, and hopping to the bathroom to take a quick shower before bed. A tiny amount of anxiety settled in my stomach as I laid down, doing my best to prop up my ankle, thinking about arriving to work with Theo and Rowan in the morning. But maybe it would be like at the lake, and I wouldn't care. Maybe I'd been randomly cured of some of my anxiety... The thought had me smiling a bit. If I felt comfortable with those two, then maybe I could broach revealing the truth to my family a little easier when the time came.
I felt okay as Theo and Rowan picked me up. I felt a little less okay as we grew closer to the studio. My stomach rolled and turned and nausea coursed through me as we pulled up to the gates, trying to appear calm as we got through security. I could see people moving through the parking lot and into the main building. I slid down in my seat, holding my stomach.
"You okay?" Rowan asked, glancing at me, driving through the parking lot at a crawl.
"I don't understand," I said, swallowing hard. "I didn't feel anything at the lake, so why do I have so much anxiety now?" My hands balled into fists on my lap. "It's not even a big deal. I'm just getting a ride. It's not like I'm getting out of the car screaming about who I actually am. So why is my mind acting like—" I cut myself, realizing I was getting angry. "Sorry."
Her lips pressed down into a frown. "Don't apologize. Anxiety is weird. It's not your fault."
I didn't respond, trying to take a few calming breaths as she drove even further down into the parking lot.
"Rowan, drive around back," Theo ordered from the back seat. "Let's drop Maisie off there, and then we'll go to park."
"I'm fine," I responded, my anger turning into embarrassment. Why did my mind have to be like this? Why couldn't it be normal? Was it because I lied so much? Now this was a constant reminder that I could be caught out at any moment? That I shouldn't have lied to begin with?
"It's okay if you can't do it right now," Theo said, speaking in a low and even tone. "Don't push yourself. It might set you back instead."
I chewed on the inside of my cheek knowing he had a point, but hating that it felt like giving up. I reluctantly agreed though, and Rowan drove around back. I scoured the area for signs of anyone before I carefully got out of the car, only using one crutch today to bear the weight of my injured ankle. "Thanks," I said before shutting the door and making a beeline for the backlot, not bothering to go through the main building.
Disappointment settled in me as I pulled out my schedule to get a reminder of what stage we would be filming at today. I'd been hoping I wouldn't have any anxiety at all, but apparently, that was asking too much. Whatever happened at the lake had only been a fluke. I still cared about people noticing me. My mind still whispered threats that they'd figure out who I actually was.
I sighed. I wished I didn't care. Realistically, I knew if anyone here found out, it wouldn't even make it back to my parents. And even if it did, I was a grown woman. I didn't have to care what my parents thought about my career. But because I cared about them, I did. I didn't want to disappoint them. Even if I had lied, I wanted them to be proud of me still when they found out the truth.
My dismay lingered throughout the day, feeling like I was just going through the actions as I worked alongside Zara. I avoided Theo and Rowan as much as possible, both to ease my anxiety and because I was ashamed. It had nothing to do with who they were as people... it was just Theo's fame.
I knew I had to get myself together before dinner. As we wrapped up for the day, I quickly went through my tasks and then decided to walk off the studio's premises, texting Theo that I'd be waiting down the street a bit. I didn't want to re-trigger my anxiety before our date.
Fake date.
It took them about twenty minutes to finally pull up. Theo drove now, and Rowan got out of the passenger seat to offer it to me, climbing into the back instead. I shoved the crutch in first before letting myself fall into the seat.
Theo turned to look at me. "You didn't have to walk this far. I could have picked you up around back."
"Better safe than sorry," I said, closing the door.
"Your ankle is injured."
I pulled up my ankle and gave it a slap. "It's fine," I said, even though that hurt, but I forced a smile on my face. "I only accidentally put my weight on it a few times today."
He stared at me for a moment longer before sighing and turning back onto the road.
This caused Rowan to snicker for some unknown reason. "God, I wish I could come with you guys tonight. Next time I better be invited. I want to witness this."
"I think my parents keep forgetting you can be invited now," Theo said, putting his blinker on as we made the turn that led to Rowan's place.
"Yeah, now that I don't have any boundaries to cross," she said sarcastically.
I glanced at her through the rear-view mirror. "Boundaries?"
"Theo's ex didn't like him having friends," she clarified. "Of any gender, apparently. Although, she just hated me either way. Which was fine. I hated her, too."
"Rowan," Theo said, his hands tightening around the steering wheel. "Stop."
"Maybe you're too good of a person to shit talk Mackenzie, but I am not. Fuck that bitch."
A little taken aback, I turned fully in my seat to look at Rowan, who held her chin up high, scoffing. Theo ignored her, and I glanced back at him, noticing the muscles in his jaw tightening. Not wanting to get involved, I turned back toward the front again, sinking into the back of my seat.
Rowan and Theo didn't speak again as he dropped her off. I said goodbye, surprised when she gave me a short smile and a wave back. The atmosphere in the car remained awkward though as Theo and I drove away.
"Sorry," he eventually said. "Rowan feels...strongly about what happened between Mackenzie and I."
"It's okay. I think I'd feel strongly too if someone hurt my best friend." And I honestly felt defensive of Theo in his situation, too, and I didn't even know anything about it.
"Yeah..." He trailed off, lips twisting into a frown, eyes still fixated on the road ahead. "But it's more complicated than what Rowan makes it out to be. She believes Mack was the only bad guy in our relationship, but I was, too."
I wanted to say I didn't believe that, but bit my tongue, knowing I didn't know enough about Theo to make that call. But from what I did know about him, I knew he didn't actually want to talk about this. He just wanted to explain Rowan's reaction. "Have you eaten at the restaurant we're going to before?" I asked.
The change of topic threw him off guard for a moment, his head turning toward me, eyebrows furrowing, before refocusing on the road. "No, I haven't been."
"I hope it's good."
"Me, too," he responded, sounding a little distracted.
We stopped by my apartment and I had Theo wait in his car as I went into my apartment to change, finding it a lot easier to maneuver with one crutch instead of two. While I didn't have any nice dresses, I did have some nice blouses I'd bought for when I met up with Director Ahn for the first time. Theo had said not to worry about a dress code, but he'd changed into a pair of black slacks and a black button-up. I tried to match that, wearing a black pair of jeans and then a black top long-sleeve top that had a high collar, but a keyhole that showed off a little bit of skin. Then I fixed my make-up a little bit and slipped into a pair of low-heeled booties before returning back to his car.
He eyed my outfit choice as I climbed back in, then pointedly looked at his own.
"Black is classy," I said in defense.
We went to see Kaila next, Theo donning a mask and hat to walk through downtown, and she made quick work of installing my wig. "Next time I'll show you how to do this yourself," she promised me.
"Doesn't that mean I'm just taking work away from you?" I asked.
"Do you really want to come here every time you need to wear a wig?"
"If it supports your career, I do."
Kaila blinked at me in surprise, then turned to Theo, who nodded in agreement. She grinned. "Well, when you put it that way... Here. Give me your phone number, Maisie. If you ever need my assistance in an emergency, just hit me up."
I gave her my phone number and she texted me hers back before we parted ways. I prodded at the copper wig a little bit, staring in the side-rear mirror at my reflection quietly. I didn't think I would get accustomed to seeing myself in it. I was so used to seeing the lavender color of my hair that seeing it nearly orange was a bit startling.
But the wig gave me that same sense of protection as it did at the award show. Where I could be myself without worrying.
"You okay?" Theo asked, taking note of my silence as he drove toward the restaurant.
"Huh? Oh, I'm fine. Just looking at the wig."
"Is it uncomfortable?"
I shook my head. "No. I was just thinking about how different it makes me look."
"You look good," he told me.
"Thanks, but I was more thinking about how I feel more... free with it on," I explained, trying not to react to his compliment. "It's just weird."
"It must be hard to lie about something that's such a big part of your life all the time."
"Yeah." I recognized the feeling of anxiety starting to rear its head just at the mention of it. "Well, I don't need to worry about that tonight, anyway."
Theo nodded. "You can just be yourself. My mom seems to like you already, anyway."
"Wait? Really? Did she say that?" I asked, whipping around to face Theo, my seatbelt cutting into my neck as I did so.
Theo noticed this and reached out to adjust it, almost as if by instinct, pulling it away from my skin. "She may or may not have mentioned how excited she was to see you again."
I felt a smile grow on my face, taking the seatbelt from Theo so I could adjust it lower. "Oh. I see."
He returned his hand to the wheel, and I swear he smiled a little bit, too.
I didn't feel nervous at all as we arrived at the restaurant. In fact, the lightness in my chest felt the complete opposite of the way it usually did. I left my crutch in the car, walking gingerly on my ankle as I moved to shut the car door.
Theo's face betrayed his disagreement at leaving my crutch behind before he even spoke it. I held up my hand, silencing him. "We're just going inside. I rather avoid the questions. Wouldn't you? Or do you want to tell your parents you fell in a lake when you don't even know how to swim?"
"I can tread water," he said defensively, then sighed. "Fine."
He held his hand out to me and I stared at it for a moment, confused, before giving him an awkward low-five.
"What—" He cut himself off, snatching my hand as I went to pull it back to my side, enveloping it in his firmly.
"Oh." I ducked my head, blushing, and adjusted my hand in his so we could lace our fingers together. "Right."
"Actually." He released my hand, moving his arm around my waist instead, hovering just over it for a second. "Is this okay?"
I nodded mutely, and he then wrapped his arm around me, pulling me closer to his side. "Use me as support so you don't have to put as much weight on your ankle."
"Okay," I said, my mouth feeling dry as I laid my arm along his shoulders, leaning my weight into him.
"Let's go."