"We have the best government that money can buy."
—Mark Twain
LISA
"Good evening, I'm Stan Mercy."
"And I'm Toni Blake."
"This is KW4 Evening news. Tonight, we will be running live coverage on the story that has captivated the nation. The Manoban name has been heavily gossiped, and in national news for years, but no more than in the past few months. In a surprising turn of events, the Manoban name is now synonymous with national security. For the past few months, federal agents have been conducting an investigation that has resulted in the deaths of Joseph Williams and two other homegrown terrorists responsible for bombings across the Mexican border and Europe.
"Five months ago, government agents uncovered information, through the help of a witness, which led to this discovery. The world knows her as Mrs. Jennie Manoban. After an attempt on her life, she was placed into witness protection. The only people knowing of her whereabouts were her wife and those of the highest clearance. This operation required a great deal of sacrifice from a great deal of people. At the latest report, the total casualty count has reached six. These were all government agents that unfortunately lost their lives protecting their country. Roger Kane, Kimberly Green, Beatrice Sinclair, Adam..."
"Holy shit," Bambam whispered as he stared at the six agents on the screen. "Did she really kill them for the cover up?"
All of us, with the exception of Jen, Evelyn, and Victoria who were in Ethan's room, were watching the news coverage. We watched as the President, the one I had spent a fortune creating, covered for Jen...covered for us all.
"I wouldn't put anything past her," Nickhun came around, and handed me a glass of brandy on the rocks. Taking in the scent, I almost moaned as I took a large gulp.
"How did I live without this?" I asked him. "I should have had it smuggled in instead of the rocks. I could have made a whole lot more money."
"You shouldn't have needed anything to be smuggle in," Mina snapped, crossing her legs in the chair as she glared at the President on the screen.
"Thank you for your concern. Five months without a visit, I wouldn't have thought you cared." Downing all of the brandy, I walked across the room to the mahogany bar in the corner.
"This cover-up...it's deep. Why did she choose terrorism?" Bambam asked, looking at the television as the President went on.
"Because there are only two wars in this country that people care about," I muttered, "the war on drugs and the war on terror; she'd rather them focus on the latter, for obvious reasons."
What a smart wife I had, she'd planned it all out perfectly.
"We're going to have to do press conferences, and a lot of them, this isn't just going to go away. We'll be in the news for weeks, if not years," Nickhun moaned, and I was there with him. The last thing I wanted do was sit in front of the same sharks who were calling for my blood only a few hours ago.
"Did Jennie speak about any of this with you?" my father asked.
"Talk to me about something? What do I look like, her wife?" I laughed bitterly as I drank.
"Lisa?" he questioned me again.
"Why the hell did you let me get married?" I sighed, as I pinched the bridge of my nose. "She didn't say anything about it, and I didn't give her the chance."
"What are you going to do?" Bambam asked.
"Right now I'm going to try to wash the stench of jail off of me. Then I'm going to drink...actually I'm going to do both at the same time and only after that I may speak with her." Or strangle her...Walking out the room, a few maids curtsied as I passed them, which reminded me that I needed to do another background check and establish some sort of leverage on all of them.
"Lisa," Mina called out from behind me.
I stopped in the middle of the marble staircase.
"Lisa, I'm sorry I didn't come to visit you," she whispered. "I spent most of my time with Ethan."
"I noticed, you seem attached," I replied, as I turned back to face her. Which was why I hadn't wanted her near him to begin with.
She squeezed her hands, and bit her bottom lip. "I am, and that's not my fault. I've been here for five months and I've watched him become more amazing with each passing day. I care about him, and I'm worried that whatever you all are getting into is going to affect him. I'm sorry to say it, but neither of you have been great parents. In fact, neither of you have been parents. But what do you expect when the both of you are so wrapped up in this family. I don't want him to get hurt."
"He is not your son, Mina."
She looked as if I'd just slapped her. "I...I know that."
"Do you really?"
I stared at her for a moment, but apparently she couldn't find the words to say anything else, so I turned around and walked away.
"Goodnight, Mina, I hope for your sake you never bring this up again, ever."
"Threaten me all you want, Lisa, but that doesn't mean I'm wrong!"
Rolling my eyes, I tried to ignore the headache that seemed to have been building all day. I'd literally just gotten out of jail for the love of Christ. There should be a waiting period before dealing with all this shit.
But I knew I wouldn't get one.
I knew we would have to face off with Ivan—Avian—whatever the hell he called himself. But we couldn't just jump back into everything like nothing had happened.
Step one was to fix my family.
It was going to take some time to get to our revenge.
But it would be worth it.
JENNIE
"Jen, I'm sure this can wait," Victoria said to me as I moved the furniture in Ethan's room around. But it couldn't wait. It wasn't safe.
"I'd rather not," I said to her.
Ethan was fast asleep under his custom-initialed, teal, cashmere blanket. They had kept the theme I had chosen for him—the rainforest, though they'd done what they always did and made it over the top, but it was still beautiful. However, his crib needed to be further away from the door and the window. Surprisingly, as I moved it, he didn't wake up.
Evelyn sat in the rocking chair, glaring at me as I ignored her. She wanted to scream, but she couldn't do it here. So instead, she threw out small jabs at me.
"He'll wake up at three a.m. No matter when we let him down for his nap, he'll sleep until three a.m. and then wake up again," Victoria snickered, as she picked a pair of tiny socks up off the ground and moved it to his dresser.
"Yes, if you plan on being in his life longer than a day this time, you should get used to it."
That had been Evelyn's fourth underhanded comment since we had stepped into the room.
Turning to her, it took all the strength I had to not strangle the life out her.
"Okay, that's our cue to leave," Victoria wrapped her arm around her mother-in-law and lifted her out of the chair as if she were some old woman.
"And we're supposed to just leave her in here? She has no idea how to raise him...or what he likes..."
"When he wakes up, I need to play the ambient sounds of the ocean." I pointed to the mp3 in the corner. "When you change him, you only give him a bit of powder because it makes him sneeze. He likes applesauce instead of milk when he wakes up, and if it's quiet for long enough, he will fall back to sleep before finishing the cup."
Her mouth dropped open, as did Victoria's. Her eyes squinted together for a moment.
"Jen, how did you—"
"Just because I haven't been here doesn't mean I haven't seen what I need to," I whispered, as I took off my suit jacket and placed it onto the changing table.
"But Nickhun said you haven't checked into any of the cameras," Victoria replied.
"That he knows of. Next time, tell him to make his virtual footprint smaller."
Her face went blank and she clearly didn't understand the term, but I knew that Nickhun would. Evelyn didn't say anything and simply left. But I had a feeling she would be back.
Victoria kissed Ethan before walking to the door. "Goodnight to you both."
I just nodded. When the door closed, I pulled both of my guns from my bag next to the changing table. I placed one behind the dresser and walked back over to Ethan. For the first time in months, we were both alone and I felt like I could breathe again. He was alive and happy and beautiful.
"I'm so sorry, sweetheart," I whispered down to him as I kissed his head. "I'm so sorry. I won't leave ever again, I promise."
Not wanting to wake him, I wiped my eyes before I sat down next to the window. I glanced outside, but all I could see were trees.
We're going to need sensor lights back there, and I was going to need body heat indicators around the whole house. There had already been one attack on our house and it could never happen again. Part of me was worried that I had triggered something even worse by coming back, but I didn't have a choice.
Pulling off my heels, I tucked them to the side of me before I crawled into a small ball by the window. The safety was on my gun as I held it against my side. Through the gaps of wooden crib, I could see his chest rise and fall...proof that he was alive and well. It felt like I had only closed my eyes to blink, however the moment I heard the floorboard creek, I was on my feet with my finger on the trigger.
Lisa's eyes were wide as she stared down the barrel of my gun before she relaxed. Glaring at me, she stepped forward.
"You can't be fucking serious, Jennie."
It took me a moment to adjust. Backing away from her, my hand shaking slightly, I sat back near the window.
Breathe, Jen.
Placing the gun beside me, I took a deep breath, and glanced once again at Ethan.
He's okay. You're okay. Everything is okay.
It felt like ages before I relaxed again. Resting against the wall, Lisa looked down at me, with anger, worry, and confusion written in her eyes.
"What was that?" she asked me, and for the first time, I took a good look at her. She must have just taken a shower because her hair was still wet. She wore black silk pajama bottoms. I swear she must have worked out every second in jail.
Stop staring.
"I'm no psychologist, but I'd have say that that would be a side effect from the last five months," I replied as I pulled my knee to my chest.
She looked over at Ethan. "Should I take him out of the room?"
"I don't know. Would you like to keep your arms?" Because if she tried to take my son away from me, she may just lose all her limbs.
"If I have to lose them to keep him safe, I would do it," she said as she brushed Ethan's hair back.
"Safe from me?"
"Yes, you. You hurt people. The only person you care about is yourself."
She was starting to piss me off.
"You know, I was in this room when you called," she whispered. "He was so small, I swear he only took up the space between my wrist and palm. He was so calm...so sleepy. I wanted him to have the world, but most of all, I wanted him to have his mother. I thought it was my fault—that Scarlet had gotten to you because of me. Then you had to fucking call and tell me you needed time. The rational part of me knew that something must have happened. But, Jennie, for the life of me I cannot understand what in the hell it was that you couldn't come to me with? Am I that incompetent that you couldn't trust me? Couldn't tell me the truth?"
"I was strung out on enough coke to kill a parade of elephants," I answered, cutting her off before she could insult herself and me any further. I refused to be her emotional punching bag.
Her entire body turned to me. "Wh...What?"
With a sigh, I closed my eyes. I was only going to tell this story once, she needed to know, no one else.
"I was doped up with coke three times day and it wasn't the low quality stuff, it was the best of the best...ours, courtesy of Scarlet and Nelson, the flight attendant on my jet. You know, what I remember the most was the feeling. My heart felt like it was constantly trying to pound a hole through my chest. Escaping, killing Scarlet, it was all a blur. But I also remember the phone call, I had walked five miles in the snow covered hills to make that call. Every word of it was the clearest moment in my mind. Listening to Ethan breathe through the phone, I swore that I would not allow my son to see me like that. I couldn't come home because I physically Could. Not. Come. Home. Somehow I ended up in an abandoned cabin. And the moment I thought I was safe, I passed out for two straight days. But that was the easy part." I sighed, keeping my eyes closed. I didn't want to see her.
"I won't go into the effects of my withdrawals, I'm sure you can imagine. It took me four weeks, two days, and nine hours to reign myself in. No contact. No news. Just cold baths, training, potatoes and water.
"I didn't even know you were in jail. In fact, it was only when Avian sent his first agent, Roger Kane, after me that I realized what was going on. He caught me by surprise while I was in the bath. One moment I was thinking of how to get home, and the next, his hands were holding me under. There was no way I was going to fight him and win. When he thought I was dead, I came up for air and returned the favor with a cord around his neck. When he woke up, I made him talk.
"Avian wanted you in jail and he needed me dead. We have our men, he has his agents. They all think that they're serving their country. They belong to the White List...a group of FBI and CIA agents hidden in plain view. They are willing to do anything and everything it takes. Our tax dollars at work. After Roger, Beatrice, Adam, Dillon, and then Tom followed. They hunted me across Europe. But Beatrice, she came prepared. She had somehow gotten one of Ethan's pacifiers." My head felt like it was on fire thinking though it all. Remembering how I'd bashed her face in during our encounter in Belgium. I'd waited until she gained consciousness before forcing gasoline down her throat. Then I set her on fire. My son was off limits.
"I couldn't come back until I knew it was safe. I had reasonable explanations on where I was. I checked only when I could, knowing full well that Avian was waiting to find out where I was.
"My life went from The Godfather to Jason Bourne; from the hunter to the hunted. I wish I could have been in jail. So if you're looking for an apology, pull it out of your ass, you son of bitch. I will not let you, or your fucking family, try to tear me down when I myself am barely holding on."
She was sitting on the opposite side of the room, and hadn't said a word. Finally she spoke. "So I was right. You did think that I was incompetent. You truly believed you couldn't trust me. Thank you for your answer," she replied softly as if everything I said didn't even touch her.
Was she fucking kidding me right now?
"Did you hear me? I didn't just run—"
"I heard you, Jennie. I always hear you," she said, still calm and it was driving insane. "When the shit hit the fan, you did it all on your own."
"Because I was on my own!" I hissed.
"Because you chose to be, Jennie. I get what you're saying. You were left out alone, and instead of working with me, your wife, you decided that you were going to do it on your own. You've once again proved that you need no one. You are the strongest. You are a survivor."
"And I'm damn proud of it."
She smirked sadly, but it was half-assed. "I've never thought otherwise. You've been trying to prove how strong you are since the first day I met you. But what you did to me wasn't strong. Relying on me, on us, that would have been strong. Instead you left an ocean between us, all because you didn't want me to see you weak. Instead, you let Avian get into your head and you faced his people alone, you suffered alone. That is what he wanted, and you gave it to him. You didn't trust me enough to believe I would have your back. So, Jennie what do you want me to say to you? Thank you? I love you and I'm glad you're alive, but other than that, it's taking every ounce of restraint I have to not rip into you."
"I did what I thought was best."
"You did what you thought was best and it wasn't. We were a team and you went rouge."
Even with how calm she was, I felt like she was gutting me. "The contract says—"
"The contract? We're going back to the contract?
"In it, did it not say we made plans together? I think you even added that part. First, your mother, now, your grandfather. Dong-suk sure made the fine print extra small," she replied, as she pinched the bridge of her nose.
"Be thankful. As if your family could have made it with me as an enemy. You were all dying slowly and you know it—"
"But we're bleeding out all over again, and right now it seems like we were better off," she sighed. "I'm done with this, Jennie. Right now I just want peace."
I took a deep breath, but didn't say anything. My chest felt too heavy to speak about this anymore.
LISA
She had kicked my world off its axis. I didn't know where to start or how to even begin to process everything she had just told me. It was like one blow after another with her. Her phone call replayed over and over in my head. And not once did I realize how much trouble she was in. Why hadn't she said anything? She always had this wall up, and I was tired of trying to break through it.
I tried not to look at her but it was hard. She was comfortable in the corner, her gun tucked behind her back, as strong as ever.
It was selfish of me. I know. But I wanted...I needed her to need me as much as I needed her. I was fucking confused.
Would she have come back if it weren't for Ethan?
It seemed that after two years, we were back to square one. Was this how all marriages were? A never-ending roller coaster of emotions trying its best to beat the shit out of you?