┊ ˚➶ ｡˚ 🍓 CHAPTER TEN !
. . . those eyes
( real life )
ʳᵉᵃˡ ˡⁱᶠᵉ!
the movie comes to a close, i'm grinning from ear to ear as i turn from the screen to look at chris, who isn't looking at me but into blank space. i'm puzzled as to why he might be staring off, letting his thoughts consume him instead of watching a cute film. maybe he's just not a fan of romcoms.
"did you like the movie?" i force myself to ask chris. he slowly turns to face me, his once compound competence had crumbled, revealing an expression of profound distraught. the sparks that lit up his eyes earlier today had been replaced by a look of unease, staring straight into my eyes, as if searching for some sort of answer in them. his brow furrowed with worry, his shoulders hunched as if burdened by an unseen weight. each one of his breaths seemed heavy, as if he carried the weight of the world within his chest. i was puzzled beyond measures, was the movie really that bad?
i personally have always loved the movie, what makes chris seem so afraid and at unease? he finally nods his head slowly like his head weighs over a ton. i don't believe him for a second, he might be able to fool anyone else with his dishonesty, but i could see right through him.
it's quiet for a moment longer, the silence threatening to consume me whole. that is, until, chris finally opens his mouth and suggests we go for a walk. i'm still muddled from his unhappiness so i don't open my mouth to speak because if i do, then i might ask him a question. so i nod in agreement and he stands a little too quickly.
i trail behind him as he leads me out the door. he's silent for a long while and the silence is practically sickening. i pretend to be intrigued in nature but i really am more intrigued to understand chris' feelings at the moment.
i can feel chris look down at me, even though i tell myself not to look back at him, i do it anyways. i smile slightly at him, he returns the favor and the butterflies flutter to life in my stomach. i pretend they're not there and continue walking next to chris, we're walking closely together and even though past me would've said no to it, the present me embraces the moment like it's my last.
someone taps my shoulder from behind me, "excuse me?" i whirl around to spot two girls looking at me with excited expressions. i smile unsurely at the pair, curious as to why they'd be tapping my shoulder and not chris'.
"you're janis westwood!" the shorter blonde exclaims, they know me? i would've thought they'd be here for chris, but they're here for me?
"yeah, do you need something?" i ask nervously, not exactly used to people approaching me on the streets like this.
the other squeals in excitement, "can we get a picture?" chris watches the duo in front of us in confusion.
"oh! um of course." they run over to me with their phones, immediately clicking the picture when they're standing next to me.
"you're so pretty." the shorter one wipes a tear falling from her eye.
"don't cry." i pat her back, making her cry even harder. the weirdness of the situation sinks in, people are here for me, not chris. a smile tempts my face as i let go of the girl who's smiling at me.
"can we be friends?" she sniffles, brushing the stray hairs from her face. i nod awkwardly, not knowing what else to say. "i'm also seventeen so it won't be weird or whatever." she chuckles, her friend nudges her while trying her best to hold the smile that lingers on her face.
it's awkward for a good minute or two, chris standing to the side as he examines what's going on. the two girls look like they want to leave but they never do. i want to run all the way home and lock all my doors and go to bed.
"what's your favorite color." the crying one asks out of the blue, her friend looks pained from the question she just asked and steps on her friends shoe.
"pink." i respond, smiling.
"well my favorite color's yellow if that says anything about me."
"your favorite color doesn't say anything about you, ruth." the other rolls her eyes. "we got to get going."
"bye." chris interrupts out of the blue, grabbing my arm. i look up to him but he isn't looking at me, his eyes linger on the pair in front of us. does he like one of them? i gulp nervously, waving bye to the two girls.
"they're fans of mine!" i say happily, a little confused why anyone would be a fan of me, i didn't think people really knew me, or like me at that.
"you have a ton of fans, you just haven't met them yet." chris shrugs, starting to walk off, his gentle touch leaving my arm as he walks away. i follow behind him, assuming this conversation isn't over.
"no i don't." i say, "not like you do."
"janis." he stops walking and looks at me, really looks at me. he's not using the nickname he gifted me like he told me he would. is this something serious? "you don't understand the effect you have on people."
i gaze at him, confused about what he might mean by that. "what're you talking about?" i voice my thoughts, he shakes his head. "nothing."
i watch him walk away as i continue standing there, wondering what he might mean by what he said. the effect i have on people? i don't have an effect on people, everyone thinks i'm a weird, quiet girl with nothing better to do in life.
he even used to think that. he might still think it. i worry that he thinks such about me, just like all his stupid friends.
i walk behind him, pondering about everything and anything. he turns to look behind him, his eyes meeting mine. i feel this is the best time i can ask what's been on my mind, "do you think i'm weird?"
"what?" he seems taken aback by my random question, "of course not." he stops walking to match the same pace as me.
"it's just, you used to think i was last year." i shrug, "i wasn't sure if you still do." he's looking at me as if i said the strangest sentence known to man, maybe i did.
"i never thought you were weird." he sounds genuine, and i believe him because he looked like he meant it.
looks can be deceiving.
bored
-molly