Title: Let Go
Genre: Angst
Warnings: mentions of death, car accident
Word Count: 1416k
Author's Note: This was actually a story I wrote for my creative writing class a while back. I changed the characters and decided to give the story to Jisung since I don't write for him as much. I hope you guys like it. Thank you for reading ^ ^
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The warmth from the sun took its leave, allowing the cool breeze of the evening to take its place. At the far end of the park, you were waiting for him under the large cherry blossom tree. A part of you secretly hoped he wouldn't show up. Yet your selfish heart yearned to see him again.
Luckily, you didn't have to wait long. Soon enough, you spotted his tall figure approaching her. He was wearing the long, beige trench coat you had bought him the previous year. His white sneakers crunched against the grass as he gripped tightly onto the bouquet.
"I'm not too late, right?" Jisung asked, sounding as if he was speaking to an old friend.
You smiled at him, even though you knew he couldn't see you. A few seconds passed before he sighed.
"Well, don't be too upset. I got your favorite flowers, see?" He held out the fresh bouquet of white lilies. You watched as he crouched down to place them beside the purple hyacinths he had brought a week ago.
You were surprised he still remembered such a small detail about you. Your grandmother used to have a garden of lilies. That might be why you were so fond of them. But you also liked their meaning, "purity of the heart." You wished you could smell them.
"Happy Birthday, Kim (Y/n)," He breathed. "I wish you were here."
Jisung exhaled and reached his hand out to touch the cold slab of stone in front of him. His eyes remained fixated on the engraved text, Kim (Y/n) 2004-2022. Alongside it was the picture of you he had taken when you first started dating. Not once did he ever think it would be used for remembrance.
The day of your death remained vivid in both of their memories. It had been the day of their third anniversary. You had been waiting for him at the crosswalk. You didn't see the car coming when you stepped forward. Everything that happened next was a blur. The beeping of car horns. The blood seeping out of your head. The sounds of ambulance sirens that followed.
You remembered him in the ambulance with you, desperately clutching your hand and pleading for you to stay with him. But by the time they had gotten to the hospital, it had been too late. You were gone.
But you...weren't. You were there to witness him crumple to the floor in heartbroken sobs. Just as you were now, standing behind your gravestone. Watching helplessly as he mourned her on what would be your nineteenth birthday.
"How long are you going to remain here and watch him?" A serene voice from behind spoke. Even without turning around, you could sense her presence—a captivating aura of mystery and sophistication. Clad in an ensemble of head-to-toe black, the older woman exuded an air of darkness.
You sucked in her breath, before answering, "Until he's ready. He's still grieving."
A short silence followed your claim, and the grim reaper took a step forward.
"You mean when you're ready?"
Your fingers curled into her palms, forming into fists. But the grim reaper disappeared before you could turn around to defend yourself. Releasing a shaky exhale, you glanced back at Jisung, who was still kneeling on the ground with tears glossing over his eyes.
You couldn't leave him. Not now. You didn't care if you were nothing but a vengeful spirit. You didn't care if you would miss your chance to go to the afterlife. As long as you could still see him every day, that was good enough.
So the next year, you did just that. you stayed close to him, always. You were there in the late nights when he pulled all-nighters to study. You were there for his college graduation and an interview for his first job. You were there when someone new walked into his life.
You observed their exchanges of shy smiles and hesitant glances. As their relationship blossomed into something more, your heart hardened.
"Park Jisung, how could you forget me so easily?" you fumed, standing out the restaurant window on their third date.
"Don't you think he deserves to move on?" The grim reaper appeared again. "Park Jisung has his whole life ahead of him. He can't hold on to you forever."
"Stop! I don't want to hear it," you shouted.
The grim reaper peered at you with pity. "Do not let your bitterness consume you, Kim (Y/n)."
But you did not heed the reaper's warning. Blinded by envy and rage, you targeted the girl Jisung was with. You started with small, harmless tricks. Things like blowing the wind to mess up the girl's hair, and pulling away the chair before she sat down.
Despite your interference, the couple's relationship grew. You never thought another girl could make Jisung smile the way you used to. You hated seeing him happy with someone else, while you still longed for him.
Then one night, your anger got the best of you. The couple had just left the noraebang. Jisung had left his phone and told his girlfriend to wait outside for him. You focused carefully on the girl standing at the edge of the sidewalk. From the corner of her eye, she spotted a delivery motorcycle.
You relinquished your supernatural powers as a vengeful spirit, fueled by wrath and resentment, and forcefully propelled the girl into the street with an unseen force. You then watched as the motorcycle driver failed to brake in time, resulting in a screeching crash. Moments later, you turned to see Jisung running out and crying the girl's name.
You thought you would be satisfied after that incident. Hours later, you observed him sitting beside the unconscious girl laying on the hospital bed. He was holding her hand tightly, crying quietly.
The heavy weight of your actions began to sink in. Only now did you realize how much this girl meant to Jisung. Your death had already caused him enough grief. He didn't need to lose anyone else.
"I'm sorry," you whispered, tears streaming down your face in remorse. "I'm sorry."
You vanished from the hospital, no longer having the stomach to watch them any longer.
After that day, you left the couple alone. You were done being resentful. Hurting them wasn't going to take away your pain. Instead, you kept yourself away and let them live their lives. Until a few months later, when he showed up again.
The warmth from the sun took its leave, allowing the cool breeze of the evening to take its place. At the far end of the park, you were waiting for him under the large cherry blossom tree. You spotted his tall figure approaching, half of his face wrapped in a white scarf. This time he didn't just bring a bouquet of flowers, but the girl he was with.
"Long time no see, (Y/n). I hope you're doing well," Jisung sighed, staring down at your gravestone.
"Sorry, I couldn't visit you earlier. But I've been wanting you to meet someone special to me." He exchanged glances with his partner, who squeezed his hand. You noticed the diamond ring on her finger.
Tears welled up in your eyes, as he started introducing her. Seeing how much he loved her, stung more than you wanted to admit. The selfish part of you would do almost anything to be in her place.
Nonetheless, you knew you couldn't hold him back. Park Jisung deserved to be happy.
"Are you ready to let go now?"
You took a shaky breath, feeling the weight of the moment settle upon your shoulders, before finally mustering the courage to nod in acknowledgment. "Yes."
But before you could follow the grim reaper, you glanced at him one last time. For you would soon be going to a place where you'd forget all about him.
"Goodbye, Park Jisung."
As you crossed over to the afterlife, you felt a sense of relief wash over you. You had finally let go of your anger and bitterness and were ready to move on. You knew that you would always cherish the memories of this life.
In the end, you learned that love is not about possession or control. It was about letting go and allowing the people you love to live their own lives. You learned that even in death, love never truly dies, and the memories you create with your loved ones will always live on.
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