My ears are covered by my small hands as I'm sitting on the couch in the livingroom, and it feels like the whole world is shaking.
My eyes are screwed shut, but I'm forced to open them as someone yanked at my arm to stand me up.
"Are you crying? Are you fucking kidding me? I'm the one who'd have a right to cry! Grow the fuck up, it's not you who gets beaten up!"
My mom was practically screaming at me, not letting my trembling body go when my father entered the room.
"Just get the fuck out of here, do your homework or some shit." He pushed me towards the stairs like I weighted nothing, making me fall to my knees.
I couldn't see anything due the blurriness in my eyes as I rushed up the stairs, straight into my room, shutting the door behind myself.
With a few strides I was in my bed, covering myself with the blanket like it would protect me and shield me from the world.
I pulled my knees to my chest, hugging my legs to make myself as small as possible.
Sobs rocked my body as I suddenly felt the ground shaking, making the bed vibrate beneath me.
I looked up to see the walls started moving, slowly closing in on me.
In panic I rush to my door, but as I try to open it frantically, the holder falls down and I knew I was stuck inside.
I turn my head to see that the walls are getting closer and closer with every passing second as I start shouting for my parents.
My hands hurt from how hard I was banging on the door, my throat went dry as I screamed from the top of my lungs.
They probably can't hear me due to their shouting downstairs.
Completely helpless, I fell to the ground and hugged myself as I shut my eyes, murmuring quietly, asking my parents to come and save me.
The space was smaller and smaller as tears soaked my cheeks and I just kept calling for them.
...
I was tangled in my blanket struggling to breathe as I woke up abruptly in my apartment.
The sheets were wet around me from the amount of sweat I produced in my unconscious state.
"Fuck!" I snapped as I found my cheeks also soaked with tears.
I needed a moment to calm down and realize that in fact my walls are standing stable, and it's dead silence in my empty apartment.
"Family kills." I murmured under my breath while slowly shaking my head.
I wiped all the moisture with the sleeve of my pajamas I as glanced at the clock on my bedside table.
It was 4 am.
"Of course, fuck me up on my first day, why not." I cussed angrily as I pulled myself out from under the covers, knowing full well I wouldn't be able to fall back asleep.
With a sigh I entered the small bathroom that was attached to my bedroom.
Upon stepping in, I looked in the mirror, but regretted it immediately.
My black hair was a mess from trashing so much during my dream, my eyes still puffed, but my face only held annoyance.
A nice long shower helped me feeling a bit more connected to myself, after these nightmares I tend to feel dazed, and like it's not even my own body.
I wanted to stay in cozy clothes knowing I still have plenty of time before I had to leave. I put on some joggers and the first oversized T-shirt I found and made myself some coffee.
Just the scent of it made my eyes roll back in pleasure. I had a small balcony next to the living room, looking at the streets and the buildings around this area. I couldn't afford living anywhere fancy, it wasn't the safest district but I didn't really care.
I had some dreams though, living somewhere far away from New York City, somewhere in the mountains maybe in a small treehouse. The scent of nature would hit my nostrils anytime I open the window, it would always be quiet apart from the birds' chirping.
I smiled with my eyes closed from imagining how peaceful it would be.
I snapped back to reality as I shivered a bit from the crispy morning air. I looked at the small table that I always kept a packet of cigarettes on it.
I lit one with my neon yellow lighter as I kept sipping on my coffee.
I couldn't help but be a bit exciting about my first day. I pushed aside the bubbling anxiety I felt nearing, I wanted to keep my cool, I knew I'll be fine.
I managed to get hired to one of the biggest security agencies. It's every agents' secret dream to get a position here, but they're choosing their workers wisely. Only 2 out from 10 people get to earn the job, after they are put through numerus tests to see their potential. I've heard that it happens that they send away all the 10 people from the group if they're not good enough.
The agency has a few people who are designated to plan these tests and make the decision who stays. We had to prove our fighting and shooting abilities, but also how we react in life threatening situations. It went on for fucking weeks, but luckily I got chosen, along with another young man in his early twenties.
It was sad to see that there was only one girl in this group applying for the job, but it didn't make me coward back. I'm aware that men can build more muscles and be stronger physically, but I'm smaller and faster which can be an advantage more often than not.
I decided to stay some more time outside until I heard my stomach rumble.
I took in a last deep breath before I walked back inside with my empty cup in hand. It felt hot inside after I just spent so much time in the cold being lost in my mind.
I put it in the sink and opened my rather small fridge that was almost empty.
"Ah fuck, I have to go grocery shopping."
I decided to have some leftover pizza from yesterday when I was too lazy to cook anything.
Given I'm living alone, the apartment is always really quiet, so I often turn on some music to bring some life to the boring weekdays.
I opted for something upbeat to really wake me up and set the mood. I finished my food, slightly moving along to the beat.
Music always made my muscles relax, my chest wasn't as tight. I was singing along while washing my plate quickly and putting it away. I like it when the apartment is nice and clean.
When I got the happy news that I was hired, they quickly measured me to have my own uniform for my first day.
It was hung in my closet for a whole week, just waiting for me to finally put it on.
I liked the all-black style of it. It contained some cargo like pants with pockets to keep some knives and a gun at myself. It was skinny, but luckily I could move freely in them. The top was a black T-shirt with the agency's logo on it. I slipped on some combat boots and inspected myself in the mirror.
I liked it, I felt like a badass just wearing it.
After I had my short peptalk, I went to put on some simple make up. I usually put on mascara and a slight eyeliner. It's just enough to compliment eyes, but doesn't change my face drastically.
As I looked in the mirror I tried to talk myself out of putting on lipstick too, but I failed miserably...
I put on my dark red lipstick that I hold close to my heart. I didn't want to be too much on my first day but I couldn't stop myself, it just looked so good with the uniform. After I was finished, I decided to keep my hair down, but I had a hair tie with me for when I'll need it.
All satisfied, I left my apartment and made my way towards the bus stop.
I had my license, it was another important part of getting the job, to have good ability at driving if anytime we have to rush from a scene.
I love driving but I couldn't afford to buy myself a car. I moved out from my parents the day I turned 21, but I started working at a restaurant as a waiter at 18 to save up so I could have my own apartment. It was years of hard work but I was happy with my current life.
After I moved out, I could work more because I didn't have to hide it from my parents and make up some lies every time about where I've been. I was scared that if they knew about it, they would take my money or wouldn't let me have a job.
I could also focus on my training more, with the desire to get in NHS - New Hope Security. I don't know how I got the idea to be an agent, but I was always mesmerized when I watched any movies related to crime, fighting, investigating and protecting people.
My bus arrived, being full with people just as always. I hated to be crowded from every sides, my chest always feels tight and my first normal breath of air is when I finally get off this hell hole.
Luckily, I only had to survive for about 10 minutes, from there it was a few minute walk to get there.
I grew more and more excited as I noticed the huge modern building. It was out of the busy streets, not wanting the casual citizens to even get the idea to step a foot in there. Not like they'd have a chance, as I got closer, I saw two security guards standing at the huge glass door.
Even from my outfit you could guess I'm an agent, but they did their job by checking my ID to see that I'm in fact new here. It didn't go unnoticed by me that both of them were fully armed, and as I glanced up, I could see security cameras recording above their figures too. Through a radio they could call for back-up too if anything went wrong.
After the two big guys decided that I was harmless I was let inside.
I tried to hide how amazed I was. The tests took place somewhere else so I've never seen the NHS building from the inside.
Upon entering I was in an atrium. The big glass windows allowing the sun to light up the interior. There were numerous stairs leading the way up, but I noticed some elevators on the side as well. It all looked neat and professional, but had a natural look to it with all the wooden elements around.
Before I could get lost, I decided on asking the receptionist for some help.
She looked more mature, probably in her thirties. Her smile was contagious so I smiled back as I approached her.
"Hello, I'm Grace, what can I help you?"
She had natural blond hair that fell to her chest as she sat at the table.
"Hi, I'm Raven Brooks. I'm new here, I'm supposed to meet Mr. Adams in his office." He was the CEO of NHS.
"Ah, so Joe finally hired a woman agent, thank god I started to go insane from all the males."
She looked immediately excited and her cool laid-back spirit helped me to loosen up a bit too. As I glanced around, I could tell she was right. Most of the people were men, just a few female here and there.
"Oh, I thought it would cost my head if I called him his first name." I laughed too.
She waved her hand. "It just hurts his ego but I love teasing him with this, he always looks like an annoyed little boy I swear."
The empty hall was echoing from our laughter as I snapped back to reality.
I looked at my watch. "Shit, I have to go, I don't wanna be late and piss him off this early."
"Oh darling you're going to piss him off more often than not, don't worry about it. His office is on the 32nd floor."
"Wow, specific number."
"It's his lucky number or something." She snorted.
"Thank you, I'll see you around." I smiled at her kindly, thanking her for lighting up my morning.
"Oh come on it's nothing, I'm here anytime you need something."
I was smiling ear to ear, I'm always mesmerized when people were this nice by nature.
My hands were sweaty as I pushed the button of one of the elevators, waiting for it to arrive. With some deep breaths I managed to calm myself down as it dinged open.
I was shocked for a second to see four men already standing there, but they were more shocked to see me here.
Okay, I get it, only about two out of ten people are women but you don't have to stare at me like that.
They stepped out and I pushed the button to my floor when another young man quickly jumped in.
He wore a suit, with a gun casually tucked away in his waistband. From his beard and mature look in his eyes I would guess he's middle aged.
He simply nodded at me so I smiled at him in response. It was a bit awkward silence between the two of us, but luckily he was busy on his phone.
Again, I felt kind of suffocated in here, but soon enough I arrived so I could exit with a deep sigh.
It wasn't hard to find my boss' office where his name was decorating his door.
I shook out my hands and took in some steadying breaths before knocking.
I could hear a muffled 'come in' so I pushed the door open.
"Hello, you must be Raven Brooks." He immediately noticed me as he peered up from the papers on his desk.
He motioned for me to sit down opposite of his desk.
I quickly checked my surroundings from instinct and got to the conclusion that I'd gladly live in this room for the rest of my life.
From this high up you had a jaw dropping view of the city in the far, and some beautiful landscape from the forest around us.
This office was probably bigger than my whole apartment with a cute kitchen section and everything, even the decoration was something I was envy of.
Before I could've taken a seat, he stood up to introduce himself formally as we shook hands.
"First of all, let me congratulate you on getting this position."
It was fascinating to see that he was only a few years older than me. He had the typical young man in his twenties look with his buzz cut and hard jawline and everything.
"We have meetings usually every day, but you only have to attend if you're involved in any of the specific cases that we are discussing." I nodded along seemed quite logical.
"With your contract and code, you can sign in our website where you'll find all the information of the cases you're working on, you can communicate with other agents, upload evidents and so on, I'll let you have your fun with it while you explore."
I let out a small chuckle, just nodding along and getting more and more excited all of sudden.
"At the beginning you'll only get small cases, don't bargain on my door asking for more exciting things, cause it never works on me, you have to prove me that you're showing progress before you get involved in anything serious."
It made sense, I was okay with proving myself. They didn't know me yet, I understood that he wouldn't trust me with life threatening events.
"Until then, you can do the office work at your desk that you'll find-" He typed away on his computer. "On the 28th floor. You'll see there's dozen floors here filled with offices and everything, please don't get lost."
I could just chuckle again while agreeing with an 'okay'. Like I wasn't tested for my orientation skills...
"You are also expected to visit the gym and shooting range frequently to keep yourself in shape, every other information is in your contract, do you have any questions?"
"No, I guess not. Thank you for your time."
It was a brief meeting, but I knew he was super busy and didn't have the time to deal with some first dayers.
I found my work floor and the dressing room where we had our lockers, putting my jacket away so I could get to work.
It looked like a fancy office where everyone had their own desk with a computer and a nice small segment that you could call yours.
There was plenty of people going up and down the floor, or sitting at their table doing some job, or just casually chatting in their free time, or doing some calls to arrange something.
I still felt a bit out of place as I didn't know anybody, and also my little work corner was completely neat from any personality yet.
I opened the NHS website and logged in to go through it and see how everything worked.
There was no case assigned for me yet, but I wasn't surprised, I was okay doing some office jobs, like checking people's background, adding their fingerprints to the system and so on. It wasn't the most exciting part of the job, but just as necessary. All of these smaller tasks were collected together and any agent could sign up to do it so.
In a few hours I was finished with several things when I felt myself being restless from sitting too much in one place, so I decided on checking out that gym Adams mentioned. Luckily, I was thinking forward in the morning when I packed myself some training clothes.
There was a map on their website as well so I quickly found out that there was a swimming pool underground, and one big gym facility that took a whole floor.
I was excited, I loved working out, it was a way for me to relief stress.
Another jaw dropping experience was to see all the modern and fancy equipment and the sight we had from the wall length windows. I've been training for several years and have seen a lot of places but it was mesmerizing.
It wasn't surprising to see that the whole gym was full, of course people with this kind of job visit this place almost every day.
I changed in the dressing room, said hello to a girl who was also in there before I decided on running on the treadmill for starters.
I was blasting music through my earbuds while I started to sweat when I was interrupted by my phone buzzing, I got a notification.
It was an email saying I just got signed up for a mission.
~~~~~
Author's note:
soo many exciting things on the way, I hope you're enjoying it