Rylan let me adjust for a couple days before his impatience got the better of him. My wounds were healing, we just had a nice meal, and after a lovely walk back to his cabin -I've avoided setting eyes on the training grounds again-, he ordered me to sit at the large table in his room. The papers had been cleared and packed neatly away on a shelf nearby. Rylan took the seat opposite me. I thought I knew what was coming.
"Talk."
I wasn't looking at him though. I was staring at the cot in the corner and something occurred to me, although I knew it wasn't what Rylan wanted to say. "Have you been sleeping in here?"
"Well, somebody took my bed." The corner of his mouth turned up the same moment my ears started burning. "But that's not what I meant."
"What do you want to talk about, then?"
Rylan let out a long sigh, clasping his hands together on the table. "Slavery has been outlawed for ages and yet, you claimed that you were taken by slave traders. Let's start there."
"Like I said before, there's not much to tell. They raided our town, took some people, and planned to sell us. You know the rest."
"What town are you from?"
I knew I had to tell him eventually. Especially if I wanted to go back to it, he had to know. I just prayed he wouldn't make any connections.
"Dast in Verdana. It's a small farming town. Not even on most maps."
"Dast, Dast." He repeated it several times before shaking his head. "Never heard of it."
"I told you it was small." I shrugged, relieved.
"Did the slavers say where they were from or where they were going?"
"The coast. They were taking us to the coast. That's all they said." I started to shake my head before I remembered something. "They spoke in a different language, too. Definitely not from around here."
"Did they mention where on the coast?" Rylan's voice was strained. Rezantri only owned a small amount of the coastal lands and I could tell he was worried that slavers were slipping by under their noses.
"If they did, I couldn't understand them."
"How long were you traveling with them?"
I thought back, but I couldn't remember. The days were starting to bleed into each other. "A few days, I think. We were in the woods the entire time; it all blurs together."
"What did happen the night we found you?"
It was quiet for a long time but then I spoke, softly at first with my eyes trained on my hands gathered in my lap. "When I found out what they were planning, I had to do something. It almost worked." If it had, I would be back home and in the loving arms of my family. Instead... I stared somewhere over his shoulder. "So I stole the key to the shackles and slipped it to the other girls. Then I started the fire and ran. Except they... Are they dead?"
"You don't have to worry about them again." When I looked up, Rylan's eyes had darkened and his chin rested on templed fingers. I took some comfort in his words. He studied me for the longest time, long enough that I felt awkward under the weight of his gaze.
I stood from my chair and walked around the table. I stopped in front of the map on the wall, the map that wouldn't show me where home was. There was a new tack on the map, nestled in the Atlua Forest, not far from where we were in the camp. The chair Rylan was sitting in scraped across the wood floor. I glanced at him as he stood beside me. I tapped the tack with my finger.
"Is this where you found me?"
"Yes. I believe they traveled along the border to keep from getting caught. If it weren't for you, they might not have been."
I studied the map. I knew I was far from Dast. I knew that. But I couldn't get over the longing I felt when I looked at the map. I reached out and pointed off the edge of the map, placing the palm of my hand against the wall. "Dast is over here. Somewhere. There's really nothing special about it. The baker's not all that good and sometimes the crops wilt in the summer. But, it's home. And I don't know. I just, I just wish..." I trailed off, not really sure where I was going. I had been rambling. "Sorry, nervous habit."
"Are you nervous right now?"
I made the mistake of turning. Rylan wasn't looking at the map, but instead his dark hazel eyes were trained on me. I hadn't noticed how close he stood to me, and now that I had, I couldn't find it in myself to step away. A light stubble was beginning to spread along his jawline. He raised his hand and brushed a strand of hair over my shoulder. And when his hand lingered, twisting the piece of hair around his finger, I think I forgot how to breathe.
Someone shouted outside the cabin and the door flapped open. We stepped apart as a soldier stepped in with a curt, "Sir."
"What is it, soldier?"
The soldier stood at attention, fist clenched against his chest. "A fight has broken out on the training grounds."
Rylan pinched the bridge of his nose and I thought I heard him mutter, "Not again." He walked out after the soldier, leaving me standing alone with the only sound of my heart thumping in my chest.
_____
It was past dusk and Rylan still hadn't come back. My stomach grumbled angrily and I would've thought it hadn't had a meal in a week if I didn't know any better. I had walked with Rylan enough to know where the dining hall was, or so I thought. I slipped on a pair of boots Rylan had found somewhere. They were a bit large in the toe and I had to stuff an extra pair of socks for them to fit. I made sure that the small fishing knife was tucked into them. I had gotten into the habit of keeping it under my pillow when I slept or in my boot when I was awake.
I turned slowly in a circle where I stood surrounded by tents in every direction. No matter which turn I took I seemed to end up back in the same place. Just as I was about to cry out in frustration, a soldier came around the corner. I started towards him at the same time he saw me. The surprise on his face was quickly replaced by something else. Something that made me take a step backwards. His eyes narrowed into slits as he stalked towards me. The bottle in his hand glinted in the torchlight. When he spoke, his words slurred together.
"Well, well. What are you doing way out here? Looking for some company?"
"Uh, no. Just dinner." I stammered. I tried to shimmy through a gap in the tents, but a hand caught my wrist. The soldier pulled me against his chest, the smell of stale beer rank on his breath.
"Going so soon, little bird?"
My breath caught in my throat at that nickname, and a different face flashed in front of my eyes. One with a scraggly beard and cruel eyes. I shoved back against the soldier as hard as I could, causing him to stumble away. He lost his footing and reached out a hand against the tent near him, but he collapsed on top of it.
I backed away, dipping between two tents and right into the arms of someone else. The slaver's face was still at the forefront of my mind, and a swell of rage flooded my veins as I thrashed against the person holding me. "Let me go."
"It's just me."
I stilled and looked up, and all I could see was Rylan's worried face. He realized he was still holding me and quickly stepped back. "What happened?"
I turned around, but the drunken soldier was gone and all that was left was a mangled tent. I wiped my eyes furiously at the tears welling up. I knew my face would be blotchy and I tried to calm myself down. "Nothing." I said, turning back to Rylan with a miserable excuse for a smile on my face. "I was hungry."
Rylan glanced around me, saw the broken tent, and narrowed his eyes. "You didn't wait for me."
"You never came." My shoulders tensed at his accusation and a frown settled firmly on my face.
"Are you still hungry?"
"No." My stomach turned at the thought.
Rylan offered to walk me back to his quarters and even after my run-in with the soldier, I hesitated to accept it. I wasn't used to feeling so helpless. I hadn't been that far from the cabin. We walked inside, Rylan holding the fabric door open, and I was about to retreat back to the bedroom like a pup with its tail between its legs when he spoke. "Don't go walking around without me. It's not safe."
I snorted to hide the chill that went down my back. "Come back next time."