Mrs. Ness ended up having some kind of family emergency and had to take a leave of absence, so they had to bring in a substitute, Ms. Caldecott.
"As I mentioned yesterday, we will be holding a debate next week," Ms. Caldecott said. "Your subject, 'Did Charles I receive a fair trial?' The pros will represent the parliament who deemed they had sovereignty and the cones will represent the monarch and try and prove that the charge against him was not legal."
Elsie wrote it down.
Ms. Caldecott asked, "What is fascinating, Mr. Dugray?"
"Uh, nothing, Ms. Caldecott," Tristan replied.
Ms. Caldecott was in disbelief, "Nothing, Mr. Dugray?"
"My notes – my notes are fascinating, Ms. Caldecott," lied Tristan.
"Yes, they are fascinating, Mr. Dugray," Ms. Caldecott said sarcastically. "As I was saying, the pro and con teams will each have two minutes and thirty seconds for introductions, six minutes to debate, three minutes for conclusions and five minutes for questions from the audience. The winner shall be decided by a hand count from the rest of the class."
Elsie wrote it down.
Ms. Caldecott asked, "Does that sound like fun, Mr. Dugray?"
Tristan asked, "What?"
"The debate," Ms. Caldecott said. "Does it sound like fun?"
"Yes, it does," Tristan replied.
Ms. Caldecott said, "It does, doesn't it, Mr. Dugray?"
Elsie rolled her eyes, because why couldn't he pay attention?
"Oh, it absolutely does, Ms. Caldecott," Tristan replied.
Ms. Caldecott asked, "More fun than staring at Miss Rory Gilmore's ear?"
Elsie looked at Rory, who was fiddling with her ear out of embarrassment.
"Yes, Ms. Caldecott," Tristan replied.
"Yeah, I think so too," Ms. Caldecott stated. "Okay, any questions? Good, I'll assign your teams." She pointed, "You, you, you, you, you – con. You, you, you, you, you – pro."
Elsie frowned, who did she point to?
Paris whispered to Madeline, "Who did she point to?"
Madeline replied back.
Paris stood up, "Excuse me, Ms. Caldecott?"
"Miss Geller?" replied Ms. Caldecott.
"I wasn't sure who you pointed to just now," Paris said.
"Oh, uh, let's see," Ms. Caldecott replied, "You, Miss Lynn, Miss Grant, Miss Rory Gilmore and Miss Elsie Gilmore."
Paris asked, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am, but thank you for asking," Ms. Caldecott replied.
Paris sat down.
Well, that's just great, Elsie thought. She was glad that Paris was on her team, because Paris never gave up in a debate. However, she could've done without Madeline, Louise, and Rory.
After class, Elsie waited in the hall for Rory, Madeline, Louise, and Paris.
"So I guess we should make a plan," Rory stated.
Madeline asked, "To do what?"
That is why Elsie didn't want Madeline on her team.
"To work out our debate, Madeline," Paris stated.
"Oh, yeah, right," Madeline said.
"We need a place to work," Louise said.
"My house is out," Paris stated.
Louise asked, "Why?"
"Because it is," Paris said.
Her mother had gotten custody of Paris during the divorce.
"You need a reason," Louise told her.
"My mother is having the entire place redone. She wants all evidence of my father out of there. So unless you want to sit on no furniture, while watching three Harvey Fierstein impersonators rip up the carpet and paint everything a ridiculous shade of white and call it 'angel's kiss' then we're going to have to find somebody else's house to go to," Paris explained.
"My brother has the measles," Madeline stated.
"My mom's having an affair," Louise stated.
They looked at Elsie.
"My grandparents' are hosting a party and Headmaster Charleston will be there and the both of us still can't look each other in the eye," Elsie stated.
Slowly Rory asked, "You can't look each other in the eye?"
Madeline asked, "What happened to cause that?"
Elsie shrugged.
Hanlin Charleston came home early and walked in Cassian's room to find his son and Elsie having sex, before he backed out and closed the door.
Louise asked, "What happened?"
"He walked in on me and Cassian," Elsie stated, feeling her face heat up.
Louise said, "Oh."
Madeline, confused, asked, "Walked in you two doing what?"
"Well, I guess we can go to my house," Rory replied. "I mean, we're having a town rummage sale, so it's kind of a mess, but it's there."
Who had town rummage sales?
Louise asked, "Isn't your house kind of far?"
"Its thirty minutes away by bus," Rory explained.
"Bus?" asked Louise. "I don't do 'bus'."
Rory asked, "Well, if you have a better suggestion—"
"I can drive," Elsie said. "I know where she lives."
The other three girls muttered okays.
"Okay, so then tomorrow," Rory replied.
"Tomorrow," Madeline said.
"Fine," Louise replied.
"Fine," Rory said.
"Fine," Paris stated.
Tristan came up to them, walked past Rory, and said, "Hey, Paris."
Elsie rolled her eyes at Rory, because it was obvious what he was doing.
She took off to go to her next class.
They got to the Gilmore house in Stars Hollow. Paris drove because she didn't trust Elsie's driving skills, so Elsie gave directions.
When Rory opened the door, Paris snapped, "There's no sign on this street."
"I know," Rory replied. "That's why I told you to turn right at the big rooster statue." She let them in the house, where it looked like a bargain bin exploded in the living room.
"I told you she didn't make it up," Elsie told Paris.
"I thought you and Elsie were kidding," Paris said.
"Oh, no, we never kid about Monty," Lorelai told her.
Louise asked, "Monty?"
Elsie awkwardly adjusted her sweater and gripped her locket.
"Monty the rooster – Monty," Lorelai explained.
"Oh," Louise said.
"Monty the magnificent, actually," Lorelai said.
"Paris, Madeline, and Louise this is my mom," Rory said, pointing at each girl when she said their name.
"Lorelai," Lorelai said. "You three have very good girl-group names." She looked at the state of the house. "Okay, so, um, sorry about the house of horrors here. Some crazy lady volunteered to lead this charity thing and we're trying to get her some help, so make yourselves comfortable. Rory, just yell when you guys want pizza."
Elsie didn't 'do' pizza, especially not ones that were frozen and heated up.
"Okay," Rory said.
"Okay," Lorelai replied, going upstairs.
Rory asked, "So, do you guys want to work in here or in the kitchen?"
Paris replied, "Whatever."
"Okay," Rory said, and they went to sit in the living room.
"Okay, so here's how it should go," Paris said as they went to the coffee table. Elsie had to sit next to Rory. "Madeline will do the introductions, Elsie and I'll handle the debate, Rory will do the conclusion and Louise will take questions."
Rory asked, "Why do you and Elsie automatically get to handle the debate?"
"Because I'm the most experienced at it," Paris said. "And Elsie is very quick at looking up facts and can handle questions or rebuttals that might get thrown my way."
"Trust me," Madeline said, wrapping some purple scarf looking thing around her neck. "You want Paris to handle the debate. She never gives up."
"Le pitbull," Louise said, looking through some clothes.
"Okay," Rory replied.
Louise asked, "So, what is all this stuff?" She held up some glittery sparkly clothing item.
"Uh, it's for a big town rummage sale," Rory said, as if she hadn't said that already.
Madeline asked, "Like a charity thing?"
"Yeah," Rory replied. "There's this old bridge that's completely falling apart and the town's trying to save it."
"Oh, cool hat," Louise said, putting a top hat on her head.
"Put that down," Paris told her. "It's used."
"Vintage dear," Louise staid.
"Filthy darling," Paris replied.
Louise took the hat off and looked at it in horror.
"There's this great store under my therapist's office who has the best vintage clothes," Madeline said. "I found an original Pucci top for practically nothing."
"Oh, Pucci is very big right now," Louise aid.
Madeline held up a shirt, "Is this a Pucci?"
"No, that's a Patty," Rory stated.
Louise asked, "A Patty?" She never heard of the brand before.
"Miss Patty," Rory explained. "She's a dance teacher here. These are some of her old costumes."
"Oh, here Paris," Louise held up a pink, sparkling monstrosity of a dress. "Tristan might like this."
Paris asked, "Can we just work please?"
"Ugh. I would love to have a boyfriend that looked like Tristan," Louise said. "Or at least Cassian."
"Cassian is too pretty," Madeline said. "I wouldn't like to date some prettier than me." She looked at Rory, "Your boyfriend's no slouch either."
"No, he's not," Rory said.
"Oh, yes – 6'2 and feisty." Louise asked, "So how's that going? Are you two still 'Joanie loves Chachi?'"
"God, I hope not," Rory replied.
Madeline asked, "You are still together aren't you?"
"Yeah, we're still together," Rory said.
"How long has it been?" asked Louise.
"I don't know," Rory replied.
"You do too," Madeline told her.
"Almost two months," Rory replied.
"Oh, lifers," Louise replied. She looked at Elsie, "How long have you been seeing the headmaster's son?"
"Almost five months," Elsie said.
Louise asked, "How good is he in bed?"
"Hey!" snapped Paris.
"Jeez," Madeline muttered.
Paris snapped, "We have a debate to organize here and this conversation is quickly veering towards the subject of Elsie's sex life, French kissing and glitter eye shadow – trashy or trendy? And I, for one, have no intention of being humiliated in front of the whole class because we were forced to study in the middle of a carnival and you three couldn't keep your eye on the prize! I want to win and I'm going to win!"
They worked in silence before Louise asked, "So how good of a kisser is Paul Bunyan and Cassian are, anyway?"
Rory, Madeline, and Louise giggled over that.
After a moment of working in silence, Paris said, "We'll need the actual quotes, so learn them by heart."
Madeline asked, "What about using note cards?"
"Note cards look sloppy," Paris explained. "We will know our information."
"But the other teams will use note cards," Madeline defended.
"Which will make us look more intimidating and make the other team squirm," Elsie said.
"And they'll lose," Paris added.
Sookie, if memory served Elsie right, came down the stairs, "Bye girls, Rory, see you tonight!"
"Bye, Sookie," Rory called to her as the woman left the house.
Louise asked, "What's tonight?"
"We've got tickets to see the Bangles at the Pastorella Theater," Rory told her.
Madeline asked, "In New York?"
"Yeah," Rory replied.
"Sounds potentially not boring," Louise replied.
"It's gonna be great actually and the seats are amazing," Rory bragged.
"Who are you going with?" asked Madeline.
"My mom and Sookie," Rory said.
How sweet. Going to a concert with your mother and another adult.
"You're kidding?" asked Louise.
"What?" asked Rory.
Louise asked, "You're going to a concert with your mom?"
"Yeah," replied Rory.
"I cannot imagine doing anything like that with my mom," Madeline said.
"Same," Elsie couldn't help buy say.
"Actually we do stuff like this all the time," Rory said, electing to ignore Elsie's input.
Madeline asked, "Really?"
"Yeah," replied Rory.
"Wow," Madeline said.
Louise asked, "Hey, how old is your mom anyways?"
"Thirty-two," Rory answered.
"Young," Madeline said.
Louise said, "So, that means she had you and Elsie when she was—"
"Sixteen," Paris cut in. "She had them when she was sixteen. We've done the math, can just 'ooh' and 'aah' about this quickly and get back to work?"
"Sixteen," Louise said. "I'm sixteen."
"So am I," Madeline said.
"We're all sixteen, okay," Paris said. "Everybody in this room is sixteen."
"Paris is right," Rory said. "We should work."
"Thank you," Paris replied.
"I can't imagine having a baby at sixteen," Louise said.
Paris said, "Well then keep your knees shut."
"Or use condoms like Cassian and I do," Elsie said. "Or go on birth control."
"Very nice," Louise said sarcastically.
Madeline asked Rory, "Do you think your mom is sorry she got pregnant so young?"
"Of course she is," Paris said. "Why else would she leave Elsie behind to be raised by her grandparents?"
"Why thank you," Rory sarcastically said.
"I didn't mean that," Paris said. "I just meant that—"
"I mean, I don't think she would recommend it but I think she's happy with how things turned out," Rory said.
Before Elsie could ask, "Like leaving me behind?" Lorelai walked in asking, "I am?"
"Yes you are," Rory quickly said.
"Okay, just checking," Lorelai said. "Hey, I'm starving. Is it pizza time, yet?"
Rory asked, "Are you guys hungry?"
"I am," Madeline said.
"I can't eat dairy," Paris said.
"Okay, one with cheese, one without." Lorelai asked, "Cokes?"
"Yes, please," Rory said.
"Me too," Madeline said.
"We're never going to finish," Paris complained.
"I know," Elsie muttered.
"I find your mother completely fascinating," Louise said.
"Funny – so does she," Rory said.
"It's almost more like having a big sister," Louise said.
Madeline asked, "And you like her, don't you?"
"She's my best friend," Rory stated.
"Truly, completely fascinating," Louise said.
"I'm going to the bathroom," Elsie said.
Rory asked, "You need to show me where it's at?"
"No, I remember," Elsie said and went to the 'good' bathroom. She sat on the toilet lid and buried her face in her hands, taking a deep breath. God, was Lorelai happy that Elsie wasn't in her life?
Would this be her life if Lorelai took Elsie with her? Doing everything and anything under the sun with Lorelai and Rory? Going to concerts with Lorelai and Rory? She and Rory wouldn't treat each other like strangers? Lorelai would actually want her.
But then...Richard and Emily would be miserable. They wouldn't have a chance to make up for their daughter's mistakes through Elsie.
If she grew up in Stars Hollow, Elsie wouldn't know Richard and Emily, she wouldn't have been friends with Skye, Pepper, Vivian, Anthony, and Cassian. She wouldn't be with Cassian now. Actually, maybe she wouldn't attend Chilton.
She knew she told herself not to dwell on it, but it still hurt. She should just let it go, but she couldn't. She spent most of her life wondering what she done wrong to get left behind by Lorelai.
She got up from the toilet and flushed it. She even washed her hands, before she went into the living room.
Rory was gone.
Elsie asked, "Where did she go?"
"In there," Louise said pointing. "Her mother called for her."
Lorelai came in holding a plate, "Hey, what are you guys doing tonight?"
"My friends and I were going to watch movies on the side of a building," Elsie said.
Madeline asked, "Why?"
"So we can have a bonfire going and drink hot chocolate and have snacks," Elsie told her. "It was Cassian's idea." She could've sworn she saw Lorelai twitch at the mention of Cassian, but Elsie elected to ignore that.
"I meant Lorelai," Madeline told her.
"Oh," Elsie replied, embarrassed.
"Well, we have these really great tickets to see The Bangles at the Pastorella Theater and Rory thought you might like to come along," Lorelai explained.
Those tickets were for Lorelai, Sookie, and Rory. Rory already said that.
"Are you serious?" asked Madeline.
Louise said, "No way."
"Yeah – I mean, if you guys want to," Rory said.
"I would love to go," Madeline said.
"Count me in," Louise said.
Rory asked, "Elsie, Paris, what about you guys?"
"I can't," Paris said.
"I have that movie marathon with my friends," Elsie said. It sounded more like fun, because she'll be surrounded by people who actually wanted her around. And she wanted to snuggle up to Cassian under a blanket drinking hot chocolate under the stars with a bonfire...
Yeah, that sounded much more fun.
On Monday, it turned out that Louise and Madeline had snuck off to attend a college party with some older college guys. Lorelai had gone searching for them and found them, then proceeded to tear into the two girls over the whole thing.
Some part of Elsie was kind of sad that she didn't see it, but another part was glad that she wasn't there to witness that.
Besides, the movie marathon was a lot more fun anyway.