I didn't stop to absorb the shock of the word. I couldn't afford to.
That man was an Alpha, a powerful one. It was as obvious to me as the sky was blue; there were no doubts, or questions. Perhaps, if he was just a random Alpha, he might have let me go. But, if I was indeed his mate, it could only mean one thing. He wouldn't let me go.
An Alpha weakens without their mate. The longer they go without finding their true love, the less powerful they become. It's the reason why Alphas are usually desperate to find their other half, visiting other packs and combing the remote woods where rogue wolves usually hide out. While usually any female wolf would be thrilled to be the mate of an Alpha, there's been situations throughout our history when the female has rejected the Alpha.
A rare occurrence, but it's happened. The Alpha's strength and powers were always affected by the absence of his mate, slowly at first, but as time went on, the greater the decrease.
I knew the Alpha wouldn't risk making a scene in broad daylight in the middle of a human town, so I knew that I had to get the hell out of here as quickly as I could if I had any chance of escaping this town undetected.
As I rushed to make my departure as quick as possible, I hurriedly tore my work apron off my body, folding it as best I could in my haste and throwing in the hamper on the side of the room. I opened my locker, grabbing the contents and stuffing as much as I could in my purse. I took a notepad and pen off the small table in the center of the room and scribbled a note as quickly as I could.
'I quit, I'm so sorry.
-Gem'
I couldn't explain the reason why I was leaving, even if I wanted to. I couldn't tell them why they'd never see me again, or why they'd never hear from me again. I needed to leave, and I needed to leave now. This was a matter of freedom. It would be taken away from me.
My chest was tight with anxiety as I opened the back door, only enough to peak my head through. I looked around, looking for any signs of the SUV, the Alpha, or anything werewolf related. I tried to smell the air, looking for any hint of smell that wasn't a normal occurrence, but it was no use. I didn't have any power left in my senses, not after all this time.
Thankfully, the coast was clear. I threw the door open and darted into the small alley, sprinting as fast as I was able to, whipping my head around as I continued to look for any sign of threat.
I rented a small apartment on the same street as the cafe, so I didn't need to run long before I pulled open the door to my building. I ran up the stairs, my breath beginning to catch in my chest as I pulled the oxygen into my body. I took two steps at a time until I reached the poorly painted door that was the entrance to my home.
I fumbled my keys, moving as quickly as possible as I inserted the correct one into the lock, turning the knob and practically collapsing into the small studio apartment. I locked the door behind me, sliding the deadbolt across, even though I knew if he found me here, no locks would hold him back.
I sank to the floor, my back against the door as I brought my knees to my chest. The pumping adrenaline pushing through my body was fading just slightly. I knew that in my own apartment, I was momentarily safe.
Not for long, I knew that. Just for long enough to catch my breath. This was not what I was expecting my day to be like when I woke up this morning.
After the incident, I lived the first year of my new life in constant fear that werewolves would come to my town. Frankly, I never wanted to see another wolf in my life. I didn't want to be in that world anymore. That world had betrayed me.
Despite all odds, I found this town and made a new life for myself. As the months wore on, and the years ticked by, my paranoia reduced. Until finally, I didn't worry anymore. I figured whoever wanted to find me, would have by now. I was finally able to live my life as who I wanted to be. Not Gemini of the lost Aurora Pack, but Gem, the person. Gem, the ordinary human.
I steadied my breath and tried to avoid the panic attack that I was almost certain was beginning to form. I don't have time for that now. Thinking of being dragged to a new pack and being held there was my worst nightmare. The opposite was usually true, most wolves would be lost without their pack.
The ones who leave are called rogues, and most of them end up losing their mind as enough time goes by. They lose their human self, succumbing to their wolves, losing their humanity and their minds. I wasn't a rogue, though. I couldn't be considered one. The time away from other wolves didn't affect me anymore, as I could never lose my humanity now.
It was all I had left. My wolf had abandoned me. I wasn't sure if she was dead, or buried in grief deep inside me, but she was gone. I no longer had any hope of finding her. Not only did I not hope to find her, I didn't want to find her. Not anymore.
My mind was split on what I should do now, I was too panicked to think straight. Half of me wanted to gather my belongings and leave, now. Get a car to the nearest airport and board the first plane available. It didn't matter where it was going, all that mattered is it wasn't here.
The other half of me knew it was too risky to move in the daytime. From my reaction back at the cafe, I'm sure the Alpha would assume I would try to leave as soon as possible. I was sure he would be out there, with the help of his Betas, watching the roads and the trees for any sight of me. He would expect me to shift to wolf form and run for the woods, and I hoped he would explore that option as much as possible. It was the only action that I couldn't take.
I quickly got to my feet and made my way to my small kitchen, pulling out ingredients from my fridge and pantry. Coffee beans, the fish in my fridge, hot sauce, and garlic cloves. I dumped them all into a pot with water and placed it on the stove to boil. It would cause a putrid odor, even to a human nose.
While I knew it wouldn't confuse an Alpha's sense of smell for long, I would take anything I could get.
I took a breath through my nose to steady myself, and strode into my bedroom, grabbing a duffel bag from my closet and quickly stuffing clothes into the bag. I wouldn't be able to take much, so I focused on the necessities. It was October now, and the cold weather was quickly approaching. We would get snow any day.
The closest airport was a small one, and I knew the only options for my destination would be equally as remote as the town as I was in now. So I grabbed my thick pants, thick sweaters, my winter jacket, hats and mittens and scarves. I made my way to my bed, reaching under the mattress and finding the small stack of bills that I had saved during my three years here. As I technically didn't exist to the government, I had no bank account. I had only been able to save 1,240 dollars.
I hoped it would be enough to keep me afloat in my new town until I was able to find a job. That's another hard part about being so remote, the jobs were almost nonexistent. Tucked between the dollar bills was the fake drivers license that I was able to obtain about a year ago. It was painfully expensive, but well done, and I was confident that it would be enough to allow me to board one of the local planes.
Finally, I grabbed the three pictures that were all I had left of my family, and tucked them into my bag.
With my bag packed, there was nothing left to do but wait. I returned to sit on the floor with my back against the door, straining my ears to pick up on any sounds in the building. So far it was quiet. It would have been easier if I had retained my wolf hearing, and it was times like this that I missed having my wolf inside to guide me.
My missing wolf was another reason that I was so insistent to never see my mate again. Most of the time, your mate is what you want most. It is the one thing you seek in life above all else. Your soulmate, the missing piece of you.
The Goddess creates a mate for each wolf specifically, and I've heard of the happiness that being with your mate can bring. Hell, I've witnessed it myself in my mother and father. The love between them was unrivaled.
The love between werewolf mates is a natural wonder, a delicate dance between two souls that are forever entwined, bound by an unbreakable bond that transcends all boundaries and withstands the test of time. The truest of love and friendship, nothing like humans can imagine. I used to dream of the day I found my mate.
That changed the day my wolf left. The mate bond is felt through your wolf. It's your wolf that drives you to your mate, it's your wolf that bonds you to your mate. Of course, your wolf-side and human-side are so entwined as one that it comes through your human senses, as well.
Without a wolf, I wouldn't experience the mate bond. While I would be everything my mate yearns for, the Alpha would be only a stranger to me. There's a reason that the Goddess doesn't mate werewolves to humans. A human could never reciprocate the complete bond of a mate.
Guess you didn't get the memo, Moon Goddess. Gemini Belane is now more human than wolf. I only prayed that the Alpha would realize that too, or I'd find myself being dragged back to the world of wolves that I had left behind.
The world that I hated, and the world that would simply be impossible for me to survive in, now that I was without a wolf.