Author notes: Okay guys, I can't lie, Jade falling at the end of the last chapter was a little funny, but it HAD TO HAPPEN OKAY. Also, apologies for the late update. It's been a hectic few weeks with exams and honestly just getting finished up with everything.
Tori's PoV
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School had been finished for a few hours now. I couldn't believe that today seriously happened. I had made my way home, and now found myself laying on the couch. I think it was safe to say now that I was more worried about Jade than ever. I mean, the girl literally cried on me. She seemed okay by the time I went back to class, but damn, it was intense. I genuinely thought I was gonna have to go get somebody at one point, I hardly knew what to do. But for some reason, she actually let me help her. She's literally Jade, she must've really needed it if she let me help her. For the first time ever, it genuinely felt like those walls might've been breaking down. The ones she'd had up ever since I'd met her. I hadn't actually seen her since then, though. She never came back to class, and I didn't see her for the rest of the day. I just hoped she was okay, wherever she was and whatever she'd been up to since our last interaction.
It was around 8pm, and the sun was starting to set. Trina was home for dinner today after I'd gotten upset last night, but after we'd eaten, she headed out to see some friends. I was okay with that, she still deserved a social life after all.
I found myself sat on a chair at the table, trying to catch up on late homework and assignments. Not the most interesting way to pass the time, but shit, at least it was productive. My evenings were usually pretty boring when my friends weren't around, and mostly consisted of homework, TV, and sometimes self care if I was feeling fancy. My pen scraped across precariously across the paper as I tried to finish my work in a hurry. For a moment, my mind started to wander. Where the fuck are my parents? It was normal for them to be gone for a while, but Mom hadn't even been home to check in on me and Trina for like 4 days. Dad was probably just doing something important with work, I didn't really care to check with him, his job involved shit like that. But Mom? No. She'd just disappear.
After a while of getting lost in thought, and scribbling words onto the paper that probably meant something important, I took a deep breath and sat back in my chair. It was around 10pm now, and it was dark out. I thought about taking myself to bed when the silence was suddenly broken by a loud knock on the door. Could this be Mom finally coming home? I pulled myself up onto my feet, and made my way toward the entrance to the house quickly, trying not to keep whoever was behind the door waiting. I placed my hand on the handle once I'd arrived, and cracked the door fully open, before looking up. And that's when I was hit with the sight of something I thought I'd never see.
"Jade?!" I called out. I quickly noticed her mascara running down her cheeks, her eyes puffy, and both dried and fresh blood dripping down from a wound on her forehead. "Jade, what the fuck happened?!" I called out again, pulling her into the house by the wrist, shutting the door behind her. Her chest was rising and falling heavily as she began to sob, not saying anything. "Jade, seriously, what happened!?" I called one last time, leading her to my couch to take a seat. I watched her as she gasped for air, before finally speaking,
"Beck broke up with me." She finally managed to splutter out through her tears. I hastily took a seat next to her, keeping my distance as best I could in case she didn't want me close.
"What?!" I responded, my eyebrows raised as I felt a scared look form on my face. I never thought I'd find myself scared for Jade West, but hey, there's a first time for everything. The one thing Cat was worried about happening happened. They broke up, and now I was scared shitless something would happen to Jade, but I had no clue what or why, because Cat wouldn't tell me much. "How'd you get all bloody?" I added, now shifting closer to her, reaching my arm out to turn her face to me and get a better look at the wound. She flinched a little at the touch. She'd done that every time I'd touched her, and I didn't know why, but it definitely added to my worries.
"I fell." She sobbed, pulling away from my touch. Her glossy eyes remained locked onto mine.
"Are you okay?" I asked. It felt stupid to ask that, I mean, she clearly wasn't. But I had no clue what to do. She sniffled as her crying slowed down a little, talking to me seemed to be calming her down, weirdly.
"No, Tori, it hurts." She whimpered back to me. I had no clue if she was talking about her face or the fact Beck left, but one thing I did know is that I had never ever seen her this vulnerable before. It was weird, but nice. No bitchiness, no petty comments. Just pure Jade. I just wished that she could've been happy and like this, instead of heartbroken. Out of pure instinct, I pulled her into a tight hug. She didn't fight it.
"Why'd you come here?" I asked softly, holding the crying girl tightly against my body. One thing about me is that no matter how mean someone was, or how much they hated me, if they needed me, then I'd be there. "Why to me?" I added. I felt her arms wrap around me. Fuck, this was weird. It was like I was sat with a whole new person. She wasn't the girl who hated me in that moment, she was soft, she was touchy. She was vulnerable.
"Because." She murmured, sniffling again. "I don't know. You helped earlier and I don't want anybody else to see me like this. It hurts, Tori. I didn't want this to happen I really fucking didn't, but I told you earlier I know it has to happen. It had to. We're not good for each other." She added, tears now streaming down her face full force again.
I had no clue how I was going to do it, but I knew one thing in that moment. I had to protect her.
"Oh, Jade." I whispered, continuing to hold her tight against me. I couldn't help but catch sight of the wound on her head again. "Come on, let's go upstairs and get you cleaned up and you can tell me what happened, okay?" I added, loosening my grip on her. I pulled back from the hug to meet her eyes again. They were still glossed over with tears, but somehow, despite the state she was in, she still looked so beautiful. It hurt me to see her hurting, and I had no clue why. She'd spent her entire time knowing me taunting me, making me feel awful about myself. But right here, right now, I felt horrible for her. I was seeing the real Jade, not whoever I'd known before. I stared into her blue-green eyes for a while. Suddenly, it was like I could actually see some of the hurt behind them. The hurt she'd hidden from not only me, but everyone. For some reason, I felt my chest start to ache. Why is it hurting so bad to see her like this when she was so mean? I shot her a small smile, but she didn't seem in much of a mood to return it, which I understood.
After a few silent moments, I stood up out of my seat, motioning her to follow me upstairs. Her body seemed pretty weak, but she managed to lift herself up to follow me sheepishly up the stairs and to the bathroom.
The bathroom light was piercingly bright, and we both flinched a little as our eyes adjusted. Ahead of us was a large mirror, reflecting the sight of us. She seemed anxious, I mean, it was probably her first time actually seeing herself since this all happened, and she was messed up pretty bad. Blood stains trickled down past her left eyebrow to her cheek, and mascara seemed to be coating pretty much her entire face. I felt awful, so decided to break the silence.
"Hey, it's gonna be okay. Come here, I'll clean this." I spoke, trying to stay as calm as possible. There was a chair in the corner of the bathroom that had clothes carelessly piled on top, so I quickly brushed the clothes onto the floor and moved the chair toward where she stood, allowing her to sit down. "Uhh, oh yeah! Right here!" I called, turning to the cabinet behind me and opening it, where I found a small first aid kit. I tried to sound as happy as possible, not wanting to upset her further. Truthfully, I had no clue how it actually felt to be in her situation, I just knew it had to be hard.
To start with, I wet a cotton pad with water and slowly started to mop away at the dried up blood on the side of her cheek.
"How'd you fall?" I asked, trying to crack a conversation with her. "You can tell me everything." I added, continuing to wipe under the wound. I noticed a slight smile beginning to pull at her lips at my words.
"I don't know, he just took me out into the forest, and we were sat on this rock thing whilst we tried to sort shit out, but it went wrong and he broke up with me. I told him to just go and I was on my own so I tried to jump down, but I slipped and hit my head." Jade muttered, her smile quickly fading. I noticed her hands trembling, and her skin starting to become paler.
"Wait!? The forest?" I questioned, pulling the cotton pad back from her face. The forest was pretty far from here, and I hadn't even thought of how she'd gotten here until now. "Did you walk here?" I added, a concerned look covering my entire face.
"Yeah." She responded blandly. "For like 2 hours." She added, still sniffling slightly from crying. What the fuck. She walked 2 hours to my place after hitting her head?
"Jade, you could've been seriously hurt!" I quickly snapped, now even more worried for her knowing the danger she was willing to put herself in. "What if you passed out or something?" I added, trying to convey my concern to her, but I was quickly cut off.
"Yeah, well I'm here, and I didn't pass out so it's fine, I'm fine." She snapped back, trying to defend herself. I sighed, and got back to wiping the dried blood from her face. I found myself moving the cotton pad gently as I got closer to the cut.
"Well, you're not fine, I can see that." I responded, continuing to wipe her face, when I noticed the slightest smile she had on her face disappear. I felt a little guilty, but I was right. She was far from fine and that wasn't hard to see. "Okay, Jade, I need to wipe your cut, so just try hold still." I murmured, moving my face closer to hers to get a better look at the cotton pad as I cleaned her.
"What, you think I can't handle a little pain?" She chucked slightly, her voice still rough and croaky from crying. It was nice to see her happier.
"No, it's not that, I just don't want it to shock you, that's all!" I responded, laughing a little now too, our faces close together. It was nice to actually kind of get along with her like this. Maybe we could finally become friends.
I moved the cotton pad lightly over the wound, wiping away the blood. I noticed her flinch a little, but she took it way better than I would've done.
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Jade's PoV
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Fuck. This was really happening. After Beck left, I managed to pick myself up off the ground and think clear enough to find something to do. There was no way I could go home like that, Noah would freak and my parents would be pissed, but where else could I go? I thought about calling Cat, but I felt guilty coming to her like this, and I hadn't spoken to her about things for a while, so it felt awkward. So, yet again, I was left to go to Vega's place. It made sense, I mean, I spoke to her earlier (not that I really wanted to) and she'd probably help me. It was a long walk, but I made my way to hers despite the burning pain in my head, and heart.
I was sat in a chair in her bathroom now, whilst she wiped blood from my forehead. I flinched a little as she wiped the wound, but it was nothing too bad, and nothing compared to the mental hurt I was feeling from what just happened. It was seriously over, and I had no clue if it was going to be for good or not. And that was scary. The uncertainty was scary. The loss was scary. Beck was pretty much the only guy I trusted, the only one who made me rethink all the ideas of men my father put in my head through his treatment of me and my brother, but now he was gone, I didn't know if he was ever coming back, and part of me knew that if he came back everything would just be worse. He needed to go, it was just scary to think about. We went from having no intention of breaking up to broken up in about 2 minutes, and that hurt.
"Almost done." I heard Tori murmur carefully as she wiped around the cut, but her voice drowned out as the fear of what had happened set in more and more. I felt the blood draining from my face and my palms beginning to sweat. I felt tears begin to burn away in my eyes yet again, and I failed to reply to what the brunette in front of me had said. "Jade? You Okay?" She added, noticing my sudden shift in demeanor. It was fucking weird to let her see me like this, but I wasn't in the mood to put up a fight. I wasn't in the mood for anything, I just wanted to be looked after. I just wanted somebody to take even the slightest bit of this pain away. And I chose Vega to do that, for some reason. Maybe it was because I knew she'd never judge me, or because she opened her door to anyone who needed it. For some reason, I didn't hate her right now. Not one bit, and that overwhelmed me even more. I felt my stomach begin to turn and my hands begin to shake more aggressively.
"Y-yeah. I just feel a little nauseous that's all." I stuttered, now finding it harder to ignore the feeling rising in my stomach as I became more and more stressed by everything happening around me. I tried to sit still and let her finish cleaning my face, but I felt my chest beginning to tighten and my legs beginning to tremble. Fuck, fuck fuck. Beck's gone. I took a deep breath, and as I did so, I couldn't fight the burning sensation in my eyes anymore, and tears began to pour down my cheeks again. Tori noticed, and didn't say anything. Instead, she pulled the cotton pad away from my face, tossing it into the sink, and pulled me back into a hug. It felt kind of awkward to hug her. I'd gone from hating her to letting her hold me overnight. Everything was changing so fast, and I didn't know if I liked it or not.
"Hey, it's gonna be okay." I heard her finally speak, brushing her fingers through my hair lightly. I wished that her words would help, but honestly, they didn't. I still felt just as scared. The feeling in my stomach kept growing stronger and more uncomfortable by the moment until I couldn't ignore it anymore, and my jaw tightened as my mouth filled with liquid.
"I think I'm gonna throw up-" I suddenly uttered, pulling away from her touch, and running over toward the toilet. I lifted the lid and emptied the contents of my stomach into the bowl, as Tori ran over to me to hold my hair back. Shit this was embarrassing. I kind of wanted her to leave, but I couldn't bring myself to tell her that in the moment. She was there for me. She was willing to do anything to help me. I suddenly felt awful for all the time I spent being mean to her; all she wanted was to be my friend. But I couldn't risk that. I couldn't risk being hurt by her. It took me long enough to trust Cat, and I loved the redhead, but even we were drifting apart lately. Shit was getting worse with my parents, and with Beck. And now it was over with Beck, and I felt like I couldn't trust anyone, not even Tori, even though she was always caring when I needed her. A few moments passed of throwing up, and I gasped for air.
"Fuck, Jade. I'm so sorry." I heard Tori's soft voice utter above me. I felt my entire body weaken, and I struggled to hold myself up. I guess Vega felt my body start to fall, because her grip on me tightened. I felt a wave of embarrassment hit me as it sunk in as to what had just happened.
"No- I'm sorry." I choked, still hunched over the toilet. My entire body was shaking as I felt the acid at the back of my throat begin to burn, and tears pour down my face. I fucking hated feeling weak. And right now? That was the weakest I've ever been. Everything hurt. My mind hurt, my body hurt, my head hurt. It all hurt, but a part of me felt a little better from the girl knelt behind me. It was like I couldn't force myself to hate her in this moment. Not one bit.
"No no no, Jade, don't even say you're sorry right now. You're going through it and I just want you to be safe." I heard her speak, still holding my hair back just in case I vomited again. "I'm gonna get you water, are you gonna be okay here on your own for a minute?" she added, still sounding just as caring. I didn't understand. How could she be so nice to me, even after all the times I treated her like shit.
"Y-yeah. I'll be okay." I finally uttered, snapping out of my thought. I looked up as Tori loosened her grip on me and shot me a reassuring smile.
"I'll be right back, kay?" she smiled, clearly trying to keep me as calm as she could. God, I really hated that she was nice like this.
"Alright." I smiled back, leaning up against the wall next to the toilet. I watched as Tori left the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.
I can't believe this is happening right now. This was the worst night of my life, but she genuinely wanted to help me, and that was keeping me slightly sane. Thoughts raced through my brain faster than I could keep up with, as I remembered I'd told Noah I'd be home later. I hadn't even thought to check my phone, and I kind of didn't want to. I was afraid something would've happened with our dad, and I'd have missed it because I was too busy fucking crying, so I just decided to not look at all. And part of me wondered if maybe Beck had texted. Maybe he cared enough to see if I was safe. Maybe he wanted to come back. But what if he didn't say anything? What if he didn't care? I decided not to check yet again, to save myself from that pain. This entire situation was kind of reminding me of my dad in general, and that freaked me out. My entire childhood was spent seeking his validation whilst he got drunk on cheap liquor, and I kind of did that with Beck too. I did things to make him happy, even when I wasn't. And now he was gone. I felt like I was nothing without someone to please, but I tried my hardest to never show that. That felt weak. At least Beck never yelled like my dad for as long as we were together. Fuck. Now is not a good time to be thinking about my childhood. But shit, I can't stop.
And before I knew it, a memory I really didn't want to relive began playing in my head way too vividly. A memory of when me and Beck first started dating, and I'd opened up to him about my family.
"Stop this, Dad. You're gonna scare Noah." I heard my fourteen year old self cry out as my drunk father threw a mug in the kitchen, the loud smashing sound ringing through my ears.
"Jade! Why the fuck did your teacher call me again? What did I tell you about telling people about this? I told you not to do that shit, do you want me to get taken away? Do you want your brother to get taken away?" My drunken father screamed at me, as I tried my hardest to hold the kitchen door closed whilst my ten year old brother hid in the living room. I was scared shitless.
"I didn't say anything I swear, Dad! I swear!" I sobbed, my entire body pressing up against the door as the sound of more things being thrown filled my ears.
"Then why the fuck are they calling? You better not have told your new boyfriend about anything that happens here! I swear to fucking God, Jade!" He screamed back. My body weakened up against the door now, and I felt instant regret when it hit me that I had told Beck about everything. And he was probably the one to tell school that shit was up. "He doesn't fucking love you, Jade! And soon enough he's gonna walk out on you when he realises that all you want to do is tear this family apart." My father added, slurring on his words. I couldn't bring myself to respond, but I was quickly reprimanded for my silence. "Fucking say something, Jade. Why do you have the audacity to fuck things up all the time, but you're too much of a pussy to speak!" He screamed one final time, before I heard his footsteps becoming louder and approaching the door.
"I'm sorry, Dad! I'll fix it. I'll tell them nothing's wrong. They're not gonna take Noah!" I cried, now taking a step back from the door, accepting defeat. I wasn't strong enough to hold him back if he was going to come out of there. And I was right. The door burst open, leaving me with the sight of my dad. He was stumbling around, a glass of alcohol in his hand.
"Yeah. You better fucking fix this before you fuck everything up. And you better never tell anyone else anything to do with me, okay? I fucking mean that." He yelled, now a lot clearer without the door there to muffle the sound. I gulped as he took a step closer to me. I wanted to run, but I was frozen in place with fear. I gasped as I felt his hand connect with my shoulder and slam me up against the hallway wall. I couldn't bring myself to make eye contact with him. "You got that?" He firmly spoke, no longer screaming. I could hardly bring myself to respond to his words, as I tightly shut my eyes to not see him.
"Why don't you love me, Dad?" I stuttered, breaking the silence, my voice small and shaky. Silence.
I suddenly felt as he slammed my shoulder against the wall, before quickly letting go completely, and storming away. I opened my eyes, still frozen in place, as I watched him approach the front door and leave, slamming it behind him.
Fuck.
As I heard the door slam in my brain, I was shocked back into reality by the bathroom door of Tori Vega's home cracking open. I physically jumped at the sight of her, and shuffled up against the wall as far as I could go.
"You okay? You look like you saw a ghost." Her now distinct voice questioned, a glass of water in her hand, and a worried look across her face.
"Y-yeah. I'm fine. J-just wondering how I'm gonna get home. That's all." I hastily made up, trying to sound as convincing as possible. I shot her a quick smile, but she didn't seem any less concerned.
"O-okay, well, it's really really fucking late and there's no way I'm going to let you walk home in this state, so do you want to stay here for the night?" She quickly responded, closing the door gently and sitting down next to me. She handed me the glass of water, and I took a small sip, then set it down next to me. I thought about it for a moment. I didn't really want to stay at first, I was worried about my brother, and I was already embarrassed enough about everything. But after giving it some more thought, and thinking back to that terrifying flashback I got about being at home, it didn't sound so bad anymore.
"Uhh, if that's alright with you, sure." I quietly replied, my voice shakier than before. Her slight smile faded into concern, and her brow furrowed. She placed her hand on my shoulder, making me flinch, but I quickly settled down to her touch once I realised it was safe.
"You sure you're alright?" The brunette questioned. I hated how she could somehow just see through me lately.
"Well. I'm as okay as I can be with the fact my boyfriend just left me." I quickly came up with. It was partially true. I wasn't okay because of the fact he left, but I was also leaving out a pretty major reason for my sadness. I was nowhere near ready to talk about that to her. She smiled slightly.
"Yeah, I get you. Now come on. Let's get to my room before Trina gets home, okay?" She responded quietly, finally backing off on the questions. I felt a small smile pulling at the corners of my lips at her words. Her voice was somewhat comforting. How the fuck was this girl I hated winning me over right now?
She helped me up off of the floor, and held the door open for me to leave, closing it behind her as she closely followed me into her bedroom.
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