Guys, gimme some ideas. What do you personally want to read about? I don't know what more to write about.
It's either that or I cut the book short.
Yes, I shall threaten you fuckers.
Also, this song gives me life. Trevor's voice is the reason I'm still here. It's him trying to feign that American pronunciation but his South African accent still lingers in some words. And don't even get me started on his guitar work- Good God, why isn't my boyfriend like him. I need a Trevor Rabin in my life.
No wait.
And Kirk. I need a Kirk Hammett- Trevor Rabin. Yes.
Savannah's POV
I've been trying so hard to understand your reasoning,
Because leaving you will never change the feeling.
Would you believe me when I tell you
That you're the one I love, the one I need.
Today – throw down your lifeline.
~Lifeline, Rabbitt
"Dad! Dad!" Ali called, sitting on the kitchen counter with a blanket draped over her shoulder and a mug of coffee in her hand, "Look at all the food mom made!"
Kirk stared, shock carving stark lines along his face. From Spinach and Feta Lasagna to Arrabbiata Pasta to Roast Chicken. And let's not mention the Milk Tart, Koeksisters, and Spice Cookies, and Koelie Koekies all laid out on the counter.
Well, I'd like to think that the Christmas spirit got me in the mood. Ever since Kirk found out I never celebrated Christmas as a child, he's always go out of his way to make the day atmost special.
"And guess what," Ali said, pulling Kirk's sleeve to get his attention, "Mom burnt my cheese toast."
Kirk looked at me, narrowed eyebrows and a teasing smile, "So you're saying you cooked all of this," He gestured at my food, "But burnt cheese toast?"
I looked at Ali, my eyebrows raised as she giggled, "We agreed to keep that a secret."
"So I was thinking we could invite my family over," He said, eyeing the pasta hungrily.
"Yeah, that would be nice," I mumbled.
I haven't been up to terms with him family since our little surprise in Bali. They had fallen in love with Ali since the moment they had set their eyes on her. Kirks little baby, whereas I was left out of the equation.
"Can the guys come?" I asked. This food had to go somewhere. I may have just gone a little overboard.
They had accepted the fact that Kirk and I were together but that didn't mean they loved me as their beloved daughter-in-law. They still resented me after the stunt I pulled ten years ago. Perhaps I had broken Kirk's heart much more than I thought I did but certainly they could have found it in their hearts to forgive me.
"Yeah and-" He stopped mid-sentence, catching himself before he could say it, "Yeah."
Between Trevor in the S.A. and Ronnie whom I never wanted to see again- Duncan was the only one who was still with me. In some way, it wrapped around me and held me tight, knowing that our friendship had stood the test of time but it also killed me, living with the memories of the five of us.
On stage. Playing to our heart's content, never realizing that one day we'd overdose on drugs, or meet with a car accident.
"Great," I said, giving him a quick peck on his lips, and earning a disgruntled look from Ali. "I can't wait."
He pulled away, a mischievous smirk on his face, "Wait here."
I was still reeling after Paris. The knife. The balcony. The wine. And just him and I, wrapped in each other's embrace and bathing in each other's presence. It was a level of intimacy I've never thought I would be able to achieve with another man.
And it wasn't sweet words and soft touches. It was rough hands and dirty words. The sweat that dripped off his body, and the smell of sex lingering in the air. It was sensual and passionate as we fucked each other until the table broke.
And now it was apparently wax and knives.
Granted it has been a month or so since we've been there but the flames of that night were still imprinted in my heart.
And now, life was back to normal. In our massive house. Aliza by my side, and Kirk, well, on tour.
"Hello there, young children."
I nearly dropped the tray of cupcakes.
Kirk. Dressed up in a red hat and fluffy beard, with this ridiculously oversized coat that made him much scrawnier than he was, topped with his sunglasses. Frankly speaking, he looked like Christmas Father on drugs but Ali was overjoyed.
Her face lit up as she stared in awe, her hands clasped together and her little dimples prominent.
"Mommy," He squealed, "It's Santa."
I wanted to wipe the little smile off her face. Santa. We need to have a little discussion because this is too much American for me to comprehend.
A part of me wanted her to grow up the rough way. Roaming the streets with swear words in her mouth and a brick in her hand. Just like I had. We were tough, and on top of the world, knowing that we'd kill anyone who tried to bring us down.
Then there was Ali. Daddy's little princess.
Or maybe this was just me wanting to have a little son. But another child was much out of the question. I knew Kirk said he'd give me all the babies I could ever want but that was definitely the weed talking. Ali was already quite the handful, and I doubted we could handle another child.
Or could we?
"Have you been a good little girl?" He asked, his voice comically deep.
I wanted to laugh as she shook her head, completely oblivious to the fact that is was her very own father in a suit.
"Now run along, you little rascal." He smiled as she hopped of the counter, stealing a cupcake before she ran up to her room.
"And have you been a good little girl?" He smirked, his hand around my waist and his lips on my neck as we gently swayed to the music.
"I don't know." I said, "Have I?"
"Well, young girl," He said, grabbing my thighs and hoisting me up, walking over to the lounge and crashing to the couch as he kissed me softly, stealing a nip every once in a while to keep things dirty.
"I got you a Christmas present," He mumbled into my mouth.
"Mhm," I said, tasting the tobacco that lingered on his tongue.
"Wanna see." He smiled, big and goofy.
I cocked my head to the side, "And ruin the surprise?"
He shrugged his jacket off his shoulders to reveal his bare chest. A tattoo. I traced it with the tips of my finger. On top of his heart, in black ink was my name, springing out of a dark red flower, little black dots dripping from it as though bleeding.
"It's beautiful," I muttered, running my hand down his chest, and looking at him with my eyes glassy with emotion, "Beautiful."
"I love you, Savannah." He said, cupping my face with his hand, "Don't you ever forget."
I kissed his tattoo, before joining our lips. He was insatiable. The more I kissed him, the more I craved more. I licked his piercing, nibbling on his lips until our lips were puffy.
"Oh for God's sake," I heard a female voice echo through the shadows, "Do you always have to fuck everywhere."
Oh good God.
Kirk's sister.
We weren't exactly on the best terms. Granted, his mother and I had bonded when Ali, whereas his sister acted as though we were mortal enemies. I've tried to make peace but there's only so much I could do before I snapped.
"Hey," Kirk whispered into my ear, noticing my glare, "No fighting."
I doubted I could live up to that promise.
I could feel her eyes burning holes into Kirk's chest as she gave his tattoo a malevolent glare. His mother, on the other hand, merely sighed, giving us quick hugs before smothering Ali in kisses.
I heaved an all suffering sigh, "I promise."
"Good girl," He smiled, planting a soft kiss on my head before he hurried off.
"So-"
"jislaaik!" My skeleton jumped out of my body.
I clutched my heart, panting heavily as Duncan smirked, "I got weed." He smiled, wiggling his eyebrows, eyes bloodshot.
"You asshole!" I said once I had regulated my breathing, submitting him to the fury of my fists, punching him repeatedly but it seemed to have no affect on him, "Scaring me like that, you creep!"
"Well," He said, turning me around and pushing me into the driveway, "You'll be happy when you see this."
I stopped. Stared until I was sure my eyes had popped out and rolled onto the floor. My heart skipped one, two, ten beats.
"Sexy Savvy!" He screamed, "Merry fucking Christmas."
Trevor. Sitting in the back of the bakkie, naked except for tight, red booty shorts. Red reindeer ears on his head, holding up a bottle of Jack Daniels, "Let the party fucking begin."
The bakkie jerked forward, and he went crashing down, a faint groan echoed through the air as we laughed until our guts hurt.
My breath hitched. Ron. Climbing out of the drivers seat.
"You- you brought him," I said, my voice shaky as I grabbed Duncan by his shoulders, "Why would you bring him."
"Look Sav," He ran his hand through his hair, "I know it hurts but staying mad at him isn't going to make it feel better."
I shook my head, refusing to fall for the truth in his words, "No. No. No."
He touched two fingers to my chin, lifting my face up to meet his, "Yes Sav. Yes."
I let out a shaky sigh, nodding my head and capturing his lips in a quick kiss before I looked at Ron, Trevor hanging off his shoulders, slurring his words until they were unrecognizable.
There was something that felt so right about this. Duncan and I high. Trevor drunk and Ron shooting us dirty looks while he secretly was high himself.
Kirk on the other hand wasn't ecstatic about this, embarrassed by us. Ali sat on Trevor's lap, giggling at his antics, too young to understand that we were all 'under the influence.' His family was unimpressed with our behaviour, staring horridly as Duncan attempted to strip for us.
"I don't care what the people say, I know where their jive is at," Duncan belted out, before we all went feral for Jimmy's solo.
"Savannah." I felt a harsh jab at my sides, "Savannah."
"FBI?" I panicked, looking around the room senselessly, "I'm not high."
"Hey, that rhymes," Ron chuckled.
"Savannah." I heard a sigh, before I was pulled into the pantry by Kirk, "Savannah this is bullshit."
I looked at him curiously, rubbing my eyes to try and sober up, too see straight because I was sure I was seeing smell and tasting color, "Kirk?"
"You need to tell them to pack up and leave," He said.
I was far too concerned in what Duncan had put in the joint because Kirk's forehead looked wildly unproportionate and his hair was far too curly, and I found myself reaching out to touch his face, pulling away when our skin brushed.
This was by far the most wildest joint I had smoked, that or the fact that I had smoked five.
"Savannah!" He scolded me, "Look here, I'm not joking. They have to go."
I crossed my arms, staring at him blatantly, telling him firmly, "No. I won't tell them to go."
"Savannah, y'all are causing chaos, besides, it's Aliza's bedtime. She can't sleep with all this chaos."
"Fine," I sighed, "I'll tell them now now."
He grabbed my hand, looking at me furiously, "Where's your ring?"
I stared at him confused, before I looked down to find my hands bare. I closed my fists, yanking my hands away, fumbling to find an explanation, "It must be somewhere."
"What do you mean, somewhere." He shouted, "It's your fucking wedding ring."
"I don't know, okay!" I said, raising my voice to meet his, "I don't know."
"Look, Savannah." He sighed, slapping a palm to his face, "We're going to go outside, light some fireworks for Aliza. Can you please just...sober up, okay? We'll look for your ring tomorrow."
He kissed my forehead, squeezing my shoulder before he walked away, leaving me surrounded in the darkness of the pantry cupboard with my thoughts. For once, I just want things to go smoothly, no fighting. Just happy.
I looked at my reflection in a aluminum pot, fixing my hair, wiping my tears, and plastering a wide smile across my face. Happy. Normal. Sober.
"Sexy Savy, hey?" I heard a female voice echo behind me. His sister. A glass of wine in her hands, a smug grin as she leaned against the fridge, "Your friends are quite the characters."
"Yeah," I said, waving her off, remembering my promise to Kirk, "Just who we are."
"Really?" She said, her words inching me closer and closer to the cliff, "Well, I didn't know kissing your friends was an African thing?"
I paused. Turned around, slowly. Looked at her. Cocked my head to the side, "When did I kiss someone?"
She looked over at our circle, "The blonde one with the gray eyes? It seems you two are quite the power couple."
I looked at her, so puzzled I was sure she was just another stupid- Savannah, that's- no. Just no. We left behind those stereotypes.
"Look," I said, gritting my teeth, "I don't know what you're fishing for, but you're throwing your line down the wrong pond. Now go run along to mommy, I'm to baked for this shit."
"So what would Kirk say?" She said, still not hanging up the rod, "Finding out you're kissing your best friend?"
My fists clenched, and it took everything in my willpower not to grab the pistol from under the counter and put a bullet between her eyes. No fighting. No fighting. No- fuck that shit.
"Listen here you little bitch," I said. Raging. Furious. Anger, "I don't know what you're trying to start but go stir your shit somewhere else. Do not test me."
"Savannah fucking Hammett!"
I froze. All color drained out of my face. All air whooshed out of my lungs. I was a marble statue, not making an attempt to move. I stood there, silenced. There was only one person in the world capable of putting a stopper on my mouth, and he was furious.
"What the hell did you call her," Kirk said, spinning me around to face him.
Nostrils flaring. Eyes burning. Voice deafening.
"I'm sorry." I squeaked, "She started it."
"Are you a child?" He said, flinching at his tone, "I asked one thing from you- one thing."
"Kirk, she got mad when I confronted her," She said, her voice lethal, "I think she's having an affair."
I glared at her. It was petty and childish but I couldn't say a word. My heart was racing to fast and I just wanted to shut my eyes and sleep.
Kirk looked at me, not angry but hurt. His eyes told me a million stories and everyone of them were flooded with pain. His eyes were filled to the brim with tears, and I'm sure he was just one blink away from crying, "What?"
"She was kissing that blonde idiot of hers-"
No. I was not letting her tear us apart. Not after every fucking thing I've been through just to make this work. But before I could speak, I felt a hand on my shoulder.
"You skank, you talk shit." I heard Duncan behind me. I turned around to find all three of them, including Trevor with his booty shorts standing behind me, "Would you like brother dearest to know what you've been up to last night?"
"What?" Kirk said, waving his hands in the air, snapping his head at Duncan, "You kissed Savannah?"
"Of course," Duncan said, putting his arm around me, "Like we don't know you gave Ulrich a little tongue action."
Kirk was flushed all ten shades of red, burning so bright I was sure he was a crisp. He was a loss for words while we all stood there with knowing smirks across our faces.
"We give her a quick kiss on the lips," Ron added, "But tongue, man?"
"Tutti Frutti." I heard Trevor snicker.
"Look, can y'all just stop fighting and just be reasonable, okay?" He gushed, directing the last part at me.
I nodded, engulfing Kirk in a kiss and simultaneously flipping his sister off while we kissed.
"Quick. Get the maretak." Duncan ushered.
I hummed contentedly as I pulled away, blushing, wrapping my hands around Kirk, who was even more flustered than I was. Dimples. Those fucking dimples.
"What's that?" He whispered, "Is it like African weed or something?"
I chuckled, "I believe you call it Mistletoe."
His face lit up as they returned with a handful of of Mistletoe, holding it above our heads as I giggled, kissing him like the world depended on it.
"Right, right." Trevor groaned, pushing us apart, "We meant a kiss not a make out session."
I giggled as Kirk playfully spanked my ass, much to everyone's dismay. Well, what can I say? I love a man who's into PDA.
"Now come on, people," I said enthusiastically, "We got a shit ton of fireworks and I wanna make some noise!"
~~~~~
Curled up in Kirk's embrace, Ali off to school and one of Kirk's horror movies playing on the TV while I attacked his neck. Life was perfect.
After our whole Christmas fiasco, I made it my sole mission to find my wedding ring but before I could even begin my search, he whisked me off to renew our vows. It wasn't grand like our previous wedding, or should I say weddings.
It was just him and I, in a tuxedo and dress as we slipped our rings on. Private and intimate. It was more than what I could ask for.
And now we were in the comforts of our living room while I showered him with kisses, and the occasional grind against his cock.
"Needy, sweetheart?" He smirked, "We've got the whole day."
"Kirk-" I groaned, fighting against the button of his jeans.
He tilted my chin, "What do you call me?"
I bit my lip, heat warming my cheeks. I gasped as he slapped my ass, urging the answer.
"Yo, Savannah."
I glanced over at the door to find a silhouette breaking through the light. Short, Danish and an asshole, accompanied by shit stirrer and blonde hair. This only meant one thing and this is not a good thing.
I was so high, I had failed to see the truth. Trevor in San Francisco, Ron not biting my head off, and Duncan taking Ron's side. It was staring at me right in the face but the smoke from the weed was blurring my reality. They wanted to get Rabbitt back together.
I had always dreamed of being back on stage but I ruled out that possibility. I hadn't picked up a guitar in years, and let alone look at a drum set. I had just gotten used to the motions of being a housewife, I certainly wasn't going to uproot my life once again.
"We got the details sorted out, all you got to do is sign," Lars said, sitting in the across me as I scrambled out of Kirk's lap.
"I told you," I sighed, saying these four words for the umpteenth time, "I'm not doing it."
"Look, Sav. It won't be the same without you and Neil." Duncan reasoned, pausing after saying his name.
"I made my decision." I said firmly, "Not going to happen."
They glanced at Kirk, who merely raised his hands in defeat, choosing not to get involved. This argument didn't go down quite well the last time, and I doubt he could live without sex for a month- oh yes, I would go down those routes with pleasure.
"Look, I-" He was cut off by the ring of his phone, leaving me alone with my thoughts.
"Savannah." Lars said, rolling his eyes when I flinched at his accent mixing with my name, "It's not that bad. Kirk's going to be there, I'm going to be there."
"You see, Lars, that's exactly the problem," I smiled, "You're going to be there."
Phone call. Again. This time from Kirk's cell. He looked me confused, then his expression softened. Worry panged my chest as I desperately tried to read his eyes, anything to give me some context as to what's happening.
He finally hung up the phone, sighing heavily.
"What happened?"
"Ali's in trouble."
I didn't know whether to proud, worried or angry...
That was until I saw her sitting next to Duncan's child, who was sitting next to Neil's child, who was sitting next to Ron's child. Then I was just pissed.
It reminded me of our old days, sitting in the principal's office, staring at the guy's mom's, knowing we were all going to collect a harsh smack afterwards, and don't get me started with their dad's threatening us with a cane knife.
"Mom," Ali whispered, "I didn't mean it."
I sat there in the office, feeling as though I was going to get suspended for being her mom but within sitting in that chair for two minutes, my attention had already trailed off to the trees out the windows.
"Your children," The principal said, startling me, "Have been caught ganging up on another student and saying things to her in another language."
I heard a loud cough from Duncan, who was desperately trying to hold back his laughter. Ali looked at me pleadingly, two words away from tears.
"So I'm afraid they're going to be suspended for a week," She continued, giving Duncan a deadly glare.
"Did they beat the learner up?" I asked, once she had finished introduced us to the motions of their punishments. I was not going to hear it. The last thing my child will be is suspended. Not by some- no. Savannah. Not those stereotypes.
"No." She replied.
"Well, did they swear?" I asked, slightly disappointed that no fists were involved.
"The student has apparently reported them saying, 'poes.'"
Duncan's laughter stilled, as we all stared at her. Lethally. "Poes?" He repeated, "You're pronouncing it like toes?"
"Americans," Ron said, shaking his head.
"Dom poes." I muttered, as we all stood up, "Well, it's a good thing she's not coming back."
"I'm sorry but I'm not familiar speaking African."
We all glared at her as she flushed red, Kirk sniggering in the corner.
"African?" I said, slowly, "You're lucky I don't give you a moerse klap."
"You run an education facility yet you claim we speak 'African?'" Duncan said, walking towards her.
She froze, stuttering as he inched closer and closer. He merely plucked a lollipop from a bowl and walked out the door, dragging his son by his ears.
"Mom?" Ali said.
I shot her a glare and she immediately kept quite. Her bottom look shaky, her eyes glassy and a tear rolling down her cheeks. Her sobs were silent, almost unnoticeable except for her gasp for air. I felt like smacking the tears off her face. She swears another child and then cries when she does gets into trouble.
"You go home, and go to your room and pick what clothes you want to wear," I said harshly.
"Why?" She asked me, before Kirk picked her up, wiping her tears, "Mom, I didn't mean to do it."
"Since you can't behave well in school," I said, "You're going to be homeschooled."
Kirk looked at me, a whisper of a smile on his face, stars in his eyes and a dazzle on his lips.
"Mom?" She asked me, worried.
"Sweetheart," I smirked, "You're going on tour."
{Filler chap. It's going to slowly pick up from here....I hope. I really just log into Wattpad and see what my hands type. In elk gevallll, what do you think little miss Alizaan's going to do on tour? Lemme know what you think. Peace out✌️}