CHAPTER SONG: Coast- Hailee Stienfeld
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Corey
When I was younger it took me a while to really understand the unsual home situation I was living in. I had two parents and two brothers, but my brothers had their own mom and even though we shared a dad he lived with them and their mom, not with me and my mom. It didn't feel wierd to me in the beginning, but then people started to talk and ask questions and that changed immediately.
My parents stayed married for years, dispite living apart and my dad being with another woman. Mom likes to say that she stayed married to him for me, but I was a kid who didn't even understand what being married was. I still wonder about it, the real reason she hung on to him so tight.
My mom is my world, she gave me everything I could ever need and want...except my dad. He always favoured his other family, I hated him for it...maybe a part of me still does.
The sun pours into the room I slept in, I've been awake for hours, I never sleep well when I'm away from home. In this particular house more especially. The bedroom was my dads idea, when they first bought the house he took me and my brothers out to buy all the decorations we wanted. A giant buzz lightyear wall clock, a life size stuffed Pikachu doll and Superman drapes.
Conner andCalebs rooms are across the hall from mine so we would run in and out of each others rooms comparing decor. But that was years ago and I haven't been back in this house since. The room is the same, untouched, or they fixed it up before you arrived to make it look that way. Either way it feels wierd being in it when it looks like this, frozen in time, mocking me with how little it's changed.
I throw on a shirt and open the door, laughter echoes through the doorway. Alec, I would recognise it anywhere. He's talking to them, all of them by the sound of it. He fell in love with this place the moment he saw it, I could see it in his eyes. Why wouldn't he? The house is huge and expensive with two swimming pools and an indoor theatre. Money, another thing my dads preferred family had that I didn't.
Shaking off my thoughts I make my way to the kitchen and find, to no surprise, my brothers gathered around a smiling Alec. His eyes sparkle when he sees me and it helps curb some of my anger.
"Geez finally." He says. "You sleep like the dead."
A lie, it just took me a long time to gather the courage to come down here.
"Jet lagged." I tell him and take a seat on the breakfast bar.
The red and white colours in the kitchen capture the light and spread it around the room. The door leading outside is open letting in a cool breeze. Conner is whispering something to Alec again who laughs and shoves him playfully. The sick feeling returns and I ignore it.
"So, what do we have planned today?" Caleb asks handing me a mug of coffee.
"I was kinda hoping you guys had some ideas." I confess.
He smiles at me like a cartoon villain.
"We could go mountain biking down the crooked trail or go to the fireworks party tomorrow night." Caleb says.
"I did hear that Kyle Briggs got some old fireworks from his dads store." Conner says.
"Sounds like a plan." I agree, Conner smiles just as crazily as Caleb and tackles me in a hug.
We wrestle a bit while Caleb chats with Alec and for a second I feel like I did when we were kids, like nothing is wrong with this picture. That is untill their parents walk in hand in hand.
"You break something and I break you." Their mom warns.
Conner and I let go of one another and he fixes his hair.
"Sorry mom." He says.
I stand still not knowing what to say, luckily Alec picks up on it and speaks up.
"This place really is amazing." He says.
My dad looks like he wants to say something to me so I take a seat next to Alec to prevent it.
"It's been in my family for years. We only use it when the boys are off school anyway." When she speaks their moms hair catches the wind and blows around her.
She's pretty, prettier than my mom in my dads eyes. Rachel, she used to be a family friend before she started fucking my dad and having his kids.
"Where do you stay the rest of the time?" Alec asks.
"Keks house." I answer from memory.
"What??"
Conner laughs and fixes me with mischief filled eyes.
"It's a building in the city, ugly blue thing with reflective windows." Conner says.
"We call it that because we made up a story when we were kids about a guy who died in it." Caleb continues.
"A tragic tale really. Poor Kek Collins was just having a late night smoke up on the balcony in the rain." I add.
"But as he was puffing smoke rings into the night disaster struck." Conner slams his hand on the table for dramatic effect.
"See Keks was not an honest man." Caleb says shaking his head. "He had a mistress, a married woman name Anna Marie."
Conner grabs a kitchen towel and drapes ito over my head. I tug on it and bat my eyes playing along.
"She was everything a man could want, hot, young and lusty as hell." Conner says.
"But. Anna Marie was married to the brute Hugh Haber." Caleb pulls the towel off my head and I flex my muscles playing the part. "A world famous body builder with a taste for violence."
Alec laughs and Conner spins him in his stool.
"That night Hugh found out about his beloved wifes infidelity and was blind with rage." He says.
Caleb drums the table with a pair of spoons.
"He charged into the apartment building and threw poor Kek off the roof." I stomp towards Conner and shove him lightly.
He dramatizes a fall and tumbles onto the living room couch. Caleb stands beside me with his hand on his heart in mourning.
"All that remained of poor Kek was his still burning cigar on the balconys edge." He says.
Alec laughs again and claps his hands.
"I see that took some real effort. Bravo boys." He says.
I pull Conner to his feet and we bow for Alec.
"We came up with it all in one night." Caleb says as we settle down next to Alec. "Sonetimes it's different. Like Kek falls on top of Anna Marie as she's racing to save his life."
"Or Hugh ends up being the one thrown over the balcony instead." I explain.
"It really just depends on our mood." Conner says beside me.
"I'm shocked you still remember that story Corey." My dad says.
I was so wrapped up in the little theatre production my brothers and I put on that I forgot he was there. I answer without looking at him.
"Some things you just can't forget."
I feel Alecs eyes on me and choose to focus on my coffee.
"Alright boys, get showered and dressed because we need to go buy some groceries for dinner tonight." Rachel instructs.
She's nothing like my mom, yet I'm just like my brothers. The thought jumps into my head unprovoked.
........
The drive into town is longer than I remember. I haven't been back here in years yet I still know where everything is. There's the stop sign Caleb slammed into the first time he learned how to ride a bike. He lost two teeth that day, Conner and I screamed our heads off at the sight of that much blood.
The 'park', which is just a nice name for giant plot of flat grass, where the town hosts movie nights and farmers markets is still as radiant as ever. We pass the thirft store where Conner convinced me to shop lift for the first time, the local church we used to smoke behind and the B&B where I lost my virginity.
The whole town is home to a huge part of my childhood...yet I haven't thought about it in years. Rachel and my dad chat while we drive, my dads hand is resting on her thigh. I can't help but wonder if he ever did that with my mom, maybe he didn't and that's why he found himself someone who would.
We park in front of the grocery store and file out of the car. The sun is hot today dispite the early hour. Rachel and my dad walk past and I smell the lavender oil on her skin and suddenly I hate lavender. Conner puts his arm around my neck and we march into the store together.
"Okay, shall we split up?" Caleb asks.
"Yeah, we got the East side you guys get West." Conner says pulling me along.
"Actually." Rachel says stopping us in our tracks. "Why don't you go with Caleb and Alec honey while your dad and I walk with Corey." She says.
My blood freezes over. Conner looks as confused as I am.
"Uh...sure." He says pulling his arm off me.
Without it I feel cold and unstable like I'm going to fall over. Reluctantly Conner goes off with Alec and Caleb, leaving me alone with their parents.
"Could you get us a basket honey." Rachel says.
Hearing her call me that makes me feel sick. I do as she asks and follow behind them. My dad looks as uncomfortable as I am, the only calm one is Rachel.
"Are you enjoying being back here Corey?" She asks.
Small talk...great. I take a deel breath and answer.
"There's a lot to miss." I choose to keep it vague.
"You know your brothers miss having you around, they were just bursting with joy when you agreed to come visit." Rachel continues.
What is your game lady?
"I missed them too." I respond.
"It's hard." This time it's my dad speaking. "being away from family."
Something about how sad he looks makes me angry.
"Sure." I answer.
"We know that your mom has been very busy as of late and hasn't had enough time for you." Rachel says.
Talking about my mom with them makes me feel even more sick.
"My mom does her best and I respect her for it " I answer hoping to dismiss whatever this entire conversation is leading to.
"But you're young and alone. That isn't any way to raise a child." Dad says.
How would you know?
"I'm sorry but is there a point to all of this?" I ask fed up with the games.
Rachel faces me with a determined look.
"You are our family Corey, dispite everything that has never changed." She says.
"We feel like you need family around you right now." Dad continues.
Finishing each others sentences too? The anger burns hotter.
"Which is why we want you to come live with us next year." Rachel says.
I have to laugh because what she's saying is so ridiculous.
"What??" I ask chuckling.
But she's serious, they both are.
"Nope, no way am I having this conversation right now." I shake my head and start walking away.
"Your mom agrees with us." My dad yells after me.
My legs stop moving on their own dispite my brains protest.
"Liar." I bark.
"It's true son." He says.
The word burns a hole into my chest and makes all the anger come gushing out of me. I turn around and glare at my father.
"What did you just say?" I hiss.
"You are still my son Corey." He says.
"Really? Because it doesn't look that way from where I'm standing." My words are hot and bitter with rage.
"Your mother works too much and it's not good for you to be alone as much as you are." He continues.
I march at him and Rachel gasps, have to stop myself before I can do anything further. My brothers faces flash in my head and I decide to curb my anger for their sake.
"You don't know shit about me or my mother, do you understand?." I spit.
My dad shakes his head.
"You may not like me very much but-"
"Like you?" I laugh again but it's sinister and hollow. "I don't feel anything for you, dad, you're just a ghost from my past that can't take the hint that I don't want you around. I didn't come her for you or to have you pick apart my life after you walked out of it."
"Then why are you here?" Rachel asks.
She looks scared. Scared of me. The thought makes me feel warm inside.
"I came for my brothers and myself. Because even though you're a piece of shit father I still care about them." I turn around to leave buglt it isn't enough. "Also, I'm going to say this slowly so you can both understand me. I will never live with you, not next year and not ever."
Behind Rachel Caleb shows up running towards us. He senses the tension in the air and his smile fades.
"What's going on?" He asks.
I take in air and smiles at him.
"Nothing." I answer putting my arm around him. "Lets go buy something dipped in sugar."
Caleb and I walk away and I hear the faint sound of Rachels sobbing.
......