Trigger Warning. I know it has already been hinted at but wanted to give everyone a warning that in this chapter assault is committed.
There were no levels of degradation that the Sawyer family were unwilling to stoop through. For their own form of punishment or pleasure, they pressed and fed on the humiliation as much as they lived on human meat. Upon returning to the household with Tinker, I had instantly come face to face with Tex who had been tapping on the table impatiently. There was no hiding the sickness, even if he couldn't smell it he could see it through the tint of my skin which was now the colour of paper. From then he only got irritable having suspected that I had committed such acts in a stage of rebellion against the family members and I did not deny it. It was not a total lie and even he knew that if something else had triggered it, I was not innocent of the misdeed. Tink to my surprise offered somewhat of a defence in that Charlie had made a 'mess' before declaring he also had his own suspicions. It was a moment that caused both siblings to look between themselves and me before deciding that even if it was late there had to be consequences and so that brought me to this. Being naked in front of the clan of cannibals was unfortunately nothing new but it never ceased to be perturbing. This time it came with water, cold water at that as I was made to stand before the walls of their home.
A tormented cry came as the water pressure from the hose engulfed me but keeping my hands to the foundations, I did all I could to think of warm thoughts and not to the fact I was instantly wiped over with the cold temperature. In their own way they saw it as a form of aid and perhaps to some extent it could be. Upon being made to strip I noticed some chunks of vomit laced into my already blood matted hair but no part of me was grateful for the amusement they got from the display in front of them. The fatigue did not diminish but the shock to the system gave me a very grudging second wind. My teeth chattered as my jaw clenched.
"Now turn this way sweetheart." Tex instructed wickedly and despite not seeing his face I could picture the toothy grin too well. This was what he got off on, the helplessness and embarrassment. There was only one thing he loved more and I was under no illusion that if this was done I would be suffering some form of pain. Closing my eyes tightly, I breathed in through my nose knowing he wouldn't be all that pleased if he had to ask twice. Wet hair clung to my face as I slowly turned on my heel and wrapped an arm around my breasts and a hand before my privates. Nothing was sacred in their presence, they had witnessed all I had to offer but whatever dignity I had left I refused to let dwindle. Upon the action, Tex merely laughed and Tink scoffed, patting his hook onto Tex's denim shirt.
"I'm hitting the hay" he announced simply stepping away from the blonde. "See you in the morning, boy."
"Depends if I'd like to lay in." The younger of the two replied, continuing to hold the hose. As it was, I didn't believe the morning would be too far. The sky was already blackened and coated in stars, the only light being those of the intense lights that Tinker had clearly tweaked with and installed. It was enough to make me see Tex's face clearly as he returned focus on me once his brother was out of view. My toes dug into the moulds of mud and grass beneath my feet as a form of comfort but it didn't even provide a distraction. "You always have to cause trouble, don't you honey?" He chimed sounding somewhat angelic in the way he asked and cocked his head to the side. It was an act and we both knew it. Crossing my legs, I just wished for him to hurry so I could try and get to the closest source of clothing. I knew how this usually ended with him and it was something that formed an enlarged lump in my throat that I struggled to swallow down. Telling myself not to cry in the dread of a repeat from actions he had committed before, I closed my eyes once more and told myself to think of a happy thought but these days there was so little. Dreams were no escape and easily snuffed out in the household. Past memories were now blanketed in trauma and happy thoughts? I could almost scoff at myself for even attempting it. There was nothing, not one thing that brought me peace and reassurance. Clicking his tongue loudly behind his teeth, Tex lowered the object in his hands, the water pressure now focusing on the trembling flesh of my legs as he leant down to grab what rested by his feet on a towel. "You get yourself cleaned up real good now, otherwise I'll just have to help you." Tossing the ivory object in my direction, I allowed it to drop rather than adjust my position to catch the bar of soap that landed in front of me and instantly frothed at the impact with water. "You want help?"
"Not unless it's to kill you." I spoke dryly, my voice cracked and sore from the dehydration from a mixture of the day's heat and regurgitating. There was no mistaking that he had heard my answer though as he released an amused noise before nodding to himself as if he appreciated the challenge. We had been there, I had tried that and unfortunately it had not yet come to fruition. I was willing to accept any gruesome execution the family would retaliate with if I took him down first, the man who had taken everything for me.
"Easier said than done sweetheart. Wouldn't be the first person to try either." He answered back, chuckling, "now get to scrubbing." Fixating on him, I glared deeply in warning despite knowing that it would not intimidate him in the slightest. I didn't want him to peek but it made no difference, along with the times before he would do as he desired which was exactly that, peeking. Sucking in a breath with difficulty through the shivering, I slowly bent down and gripped at the small bar of soap attempting to remain in my awkward pose to not let anything slip or be seen. Tightening my fingers as the oils slid against my flesh as the bar continued to froth and bubble. Starting with my legs I glazed over them wanting the moment to be over with. Tex too had had an early rise with his brothers and I could only hope that all he had intentions for were sleep. "You know you've been a real bad girl again, don't you?" Trying to ignore the intent that laced his tone, I focused on creating circles behind where my hand shielded. "You know you can't just continue to spit out your food like a baby, don't you?" It hadn't been the first time, it wouldn't be the last. There was no trying to promise or make an oath that I would change. We knew I wouldn't mean it for a second. Keeping my tired, green eyes locked on the blonde, I watched as his tongue poked out above his lower teeth and told myself to finish sooner rather than later. "Someone needs to teach you some lessons again." My chest tightened, my back and body clenching as if trying to ball up. He was clearly volunteering for the job and when like this and weak from what the day had brought, it was easier to peel at the vulnerability that the cannibals and murderers had placed in me. I withdrew slightly, taking a step back to make more space between us.
"Don't." His blue eyes were glazed under the lights, his hands allowing the hose to slowly drop to the ground and water the area in its immediate reach. Even over the splashing, I heard the drumming of my heart as it quickened in pace, my breath catching in my throat once more. "Don't." I repeated sterner in hopes it would be enough and raised a hand before me. He was focusing on the buckle of his belt, unclipping it and I knew what was coming and that nothing that could be said would stop him doing what he wanted. So instead there were only two options. Trying to talk him down or fight and I was too exhausted to do the latter. Tex tutted loudly as he shook his head. It was as if he was scolding me in a way but the wicked look on his face remained glued on, his features engulfed in shadow as he held his head down and took a step forwards.
"Begging gets you nowhere sweetheart, we both know I enjoy it." Dropping the bar to the soaking grass, I held up both my hands. Now my hope faltered as I knew that the reality was that if he really was committed to the attack he was playing out in his mind then he wouldn't be so easily talked to. I bit my lip feeling the flesh tug and break upon the toughness of impact. "Now, do you want this the nice way or the painful way? You know I like it either way and you were partially good for Tink so the choice is yours, this time."
"No way." I breathed trying to remain as composed as possible as now he was stepping forwards and pulling the button of his jeans through its loop. His eyes focused on me determinedly knowing I would move if I could and that I wouldn't take it 'nicely.' There was no such thing as a nice way when it came to him there was only pain and more pain. "No way."
"There ain't no third option honey, you're lucky I even gave you two." Separating the two parts of material after relinquishing the zipper of his bottoms, my eyes burned threateningly once more. I knew what was coming. Tex moved quickly, using the speed the wetness of the ground aided him and before I could react, I felt the pain ripple into my back and against my skull. His legs pinned mine down against his closely and I felt his heavy and thick breaths as clearly as I could hear them. A whine escaped my throat, the discomfort from doing so ensured he heard but would only just. Lowering himself down, I pushed my hands forwards and against his chest in an attempt to push him back. By now his legs were between mine and I could feel the hardness that resided between his legs.
"Get off of me." My voice whimpered and broke as he tried to capture my wrists with one of his hands, the remnants of soap aiding me in trying to evade him. Pushing down heavier his chest pinned against my breasts and heaving chest. My legs tried and failed to push him off as strangled sobs and in response, he took to moaning against my ear mockingly. "Get off of me!"
"You're so warm." He purred, ignoring the shouts I struggled to make. Pushing feebly at his chest again, this time he succeeded in gripping both wrists in his hand. Grunting in defiance and fear, I tried to struggle back as my breasts moved upwards with his notion and after pressing his lips to the flesh of my throat he latched on to my nipple. Between my legs I could feel the throbbing, tears stinging the corner of my eyes as I attempted to shrug and force him off. He did not budge and merely pushed his legs further apart meaning mine with his so he would have an opening.
"I'll be good." It was a pathetic attempt and it was something he confirmed. Wincing as he gripped at the flesh before lifting his head so his nose touched mine, he breathed my name. I was clutching at straws and it was a lie. There would never be a day where I wanted nothing more than to be as far away from Tex Sawyer as I could be.
"Where would the fun be in that?" Tex asked simply as if it was the most obvious thing. Crying out and trying to shift to the side in hopes of being able to roll or make him slacken his hold. "Painful way it is." His voice whispered in my ear in spiteful glee. "Turn over sweetheart."
"No."
"You gonna make me turn you over?"
"Get off of me." There was no hiding the sobs as a curled up fist collided with my chest. My head spun and I could feel his strong grip lower from my hands that were over my head and fingers lacing in a tight handful. "Get the fuck off of me!" Screaming caught in my throat as the blonde pulled me up with my back to his torso panting away before kicking at the back of my legs which buckled immediately upon impact. Crying out as my knees collide heavily to the wet and mud ridden, Tex was instantly on me, his hips rolling and grinding, wanting me to feel what he was about to do before committing the act.
"You gonna spread your legs for me?" He cackled as I shook my head. "Not like it's a choice."
"Don't." It was the only word I could now manage. Trying to reach out in front of me only had Tex grabbing at my left and holding it down, his other hand now caressing the flesh of my buttocks with gentle hums of approval. Rage flushed through me but by now he was only applying pressure and weight. His lips caressed the back of my neck before feeling his teeth pierced against the skin. A sob escaped as he gave an excited shudder, his every move vibrating against my body, it was what he wanted to hear, what he wanted to enjoy and it truly disgusted me. It could only make me feel more sick but my stomach was empty and I knew it would not spare me from his attack. Moaning again loudly to mock me, I shuddered and tried to reach for anything that could aid me before gripping at a length of grass. There were no rocks, no weapons and he knew it as his hips pushed and grunting in a mixture of horror and pain, I could feel my knees dig into the dirt.
"You really want this to hurt, don't you?"Tex chortled as I shook my head vigorously, wet strands of hair sticking to my face as I kept desperately trying to move or twitch to get him away but with each movement I made to break away, the harder he held on to where he had me, on my knees with him directly behind. I felt it once again, the hardened member which only seemed to be reacting more with each cry. Feeling his lips against caress and teeth gnawing, I feebly tried to pull forwards as his hands now moved lower down. I flinched. I could feel the swell, I knew what was coming and there was nothing I could do. We both were aware of that. Gritting my teeth as I felt the separating of my cheeks, I shook my head but Tex was stronger and kept me still. I could feel the pressure as he grunted determined to find his access.
"Don't."
"You want me to use the soap, huh? Maybe it'll help you a little bit?" His voice was raspy as he asked and shaking my head I squeezed my eyes shut wanting him off and away. "Or maybe you like the pain. Is that it Lori? We both know that Joel never did this with you, don't we? He didn't know how to treat you and wasted what he had." Tears continued to stream down my face before he pushed and bucked against my hips. Ramming against me I heard the noise and associated the pain immediately. Gripping at the ground and trying to pull free, his fingers laced into my hair against holding me back to get deeper and groaned loudly down my ear. All I could manage was screams and whimpers at the discomfort. Tightening his hold on my hair his loud moans echoed down my ear, his thrusts coming in harder and deeper. My jaw clenched, my body thrashed but he would not stop. The slapping noises erupted against my body with more pain and a louder reaction from Tex. My body violently jerked against his own but he would not let go or falter.
"Stop!" The pleas struggled to escape my lips between the cries but naturally he didn't and there was no relenting as he ranged between moving faster before focusing on deeper a sensation that made me gag and choke. Minutes dragged out with every hit and noise of pleasure that left his lips. "God stop it." Tex's whispers of compliments and taunts being drowned out by his actions and calls of enjoyment. I couldn't block it out, each time I tried he countered the action with a few harsh smacks made against the flesh of my buttocks as he moved painfully, not relenting. Other times it was bites or the need to tug painfully against my breast trying to evoke reactions. It was how he liked it, with many tears and knowing how much I would hate him for it.
"Poor Joel," he taunted cruelly into my ear as he painfully tugged my head to the side. Tears continued to streak rapidly down my face. I could feel the sweat against my wet skin, my stomach continuing to knot and tighten. "Not knowing what you wanted all that time." Another hit to the bottom, another sound of ecstasy mewling in his throat.
"No."
"You enjoy this sweetheart? I know I am." He continued. Adding to the disgust I felt the wet of his tongue up my cheek and continued trying to shake my head to let him know he was wrong. No one deserved or wanted this life he had given me. "Good thing you've got me honey. I take good care of you."
"No."
Taking slow and hard thrusts before a longer breath told me what was to come next, Tex's fingers slacked from my hair before allowing me to drop feeling what he had left behind dripping down the back of my thigh. Not pulling out the full way, I clenched and slackened as he pushed in once more so I could feel the mess he had made. He grunted in approval behind me while I did all that I could do. I wept into the mud coughing and spluttering with trembling hands and body. His pants continued but he did not remove himself.
"Looks like I'm gonna have to clean you up again sweetheart." He stated simply.
There was only one silver lining that came from this day. Usually after committing the abysmal act, Tex expected little if anything from me afterwards and while I didn't want to be on, in or near the Sawyer's property, it was the lesser of evils when it came to actually being near one of them. The revulsion struck me, the sick feeling left knotted in my stomach and refusing to let loose. The pain was just as bad, each time I moved it felt like he was continuing his attack and so I tried to move very little, something that was aided in the form of a handcuff keeping me to the bed frame.
From downstairs there were muffled voices but I tried to focus away from them and what was amusing them. I wanted no part of it. Alfredo had already made it clear that he had heard the full thing by sniggering and making a comment when he passed the door only to have it shut in his face from the pillow Tex launched at him. Not long afterwards, he had followed him and as much as I found solitude in the silence it was difficult to really picture myself anywhere but here. It was a harsh reality but even if anyone was looking I couldn't help but doubt they would find me and if they did it was moments before they like everyone were butchered.
Closing my eyes, I flinched as I breathed in and tried to find something that would capture my attention and away from everything. The same four walls were peeling and in need of a paint job. The dressing table spread out with the remains of makeup and perfumes that Tex had chosen when looting the belongings of their victims. Sherri's bottle still stood out to me and it was enough to make my fingers clench into a fist. Like with each of us, they had no respect and our belongings were no better. I suppose I ought to have been grateful to some extent however. Unlike the little girl's room, the floor was not littered with bones, didn't stink of decay and sweat like Alfredo's and while I hadn't seen Mama's I would hazard a guess that it would be no better. For the most part, Tex could be tidy and was quite on top of hygiene but perhaps that was more because he needed to be, no one with sense would stop and pick up a blood soaked or roadkill smelling passenger. Part of me wished that he was a slob, that way none of what had taken place would have done.
"Too late now." My voice cracked as I spoke quietly to myself. It was the truth, it had happened and the nightmare was a constant thing. This was as much of a break as they would give me and it never seemed long enough. It was only a matter of time until the blonde would return to get changed and while I could hope that he was planning to take off for a few hours I felt for whoever ended up with him in their car. Guilt niggled slightly as I found my hope to be selfish and with difficulty, adjusted myself to try and be more comfortable. Laying on my back rather than on my side, I winced again and felt sickened when I felt what remained there. "Anything else." I pressed again. My thoughts went to music, to what could lead me astray for some time and came with happier memories. Inhaling gently I recalled a song on the radio from my first date with Joel. Heart of Glass sang gently in my mind but the pieces were misaligned as I could only see him the way I lost him. There was no imagery my brain wanted to concoct so instead I hummed the lyrics quietly to myself with gentle groans as the circulation in my arm began to cut off and pulse. Shaking my hand, the metal clanged against that of the bed frame. "Once I had a love and it was a gas." I sighed trying to remember word for word, "soon turned out had a heart of glass." Nodding to the words, I halted when I heard the creaking of floorboards and hoped it was Tink. I wasn't that fortunate and snapped my head to the side away from Tex and out the window.
"Still having a sulk?" He asked simply as I gritted my teeth refusing to respond. Knowing the answer for himself, he gave a long and drawn out sigh. "You must be hungry by now."
"Get away from me." I ordered sharply, refusing to look in his direction.
"You know one day I might listen and then you wouldn't be so happy."
"I'd be ecstatic."
"Yeah well maybe we'll find out someday." He didn't sound convinced however. He clung like a leech and unfortunately I still had a supply of blood. "How about I put it this way sweetheart. You behave and you can get dressed. I don't mind the view so by all means, don't." Revulsion returned as I kept my mouth firmly shut. Now he was walking around the bedframe slowly and held up an apple as if doing me a huge favour. "Figured you'd sulk some more if you had bacon."
"Since when did you care about what I said?" I scoffed dubiously. He hadn't, from day one he had his own views which he put far above my own. He gave a small grin to himself before sitting on the edge of the bed beside me.
"Since I figured that forever was a long time to have you mad at me."
"Just until you're dead, not forever." Laughing instantly at the answer, he reached forwards to pat my thigh. He doubted that I could, that much was clear and part of me wondered if I truly could put an end to someone if I got my hands on a gun. Yes, I decided, I could and especially if it was him. It was the least he and his family deserved. I'd happily line them up and execute them with no remorse.
"Well" he hummed in amusement to himself before grinning widely as he fished a small key out of his rather feminine looking dressing gown, "you know if you somehow succeeded, you'd be coming with me." Reaching over my exhausted body, he hesitated as I sucked in a breath and turned my head once more. "Are you going to get all screamy when I take this off? Usually I don't mind but I'm still tired after having fun with you last night." I gave a noise of abhorrence to stress that we did not see what happened the same way. It wasn't consensual or in any way 'fun' to me. "I'll just take that as a no."
"Take it up your ass." It was an immature thing to say but grudgingly not as bad as what he came out with.
"Think you mean me sticking it in your ass, sweetheart." Feeling the fury rush and ache, I kept my mouth shut refusing to respond to it as the small click of the cuff let me know I was free from my bind. Rubbing my raw red wrist, I breathed quietly before struggling to sit up and leant away from him as he laid back at my side. "You could say thank you, you know what manners are."
"Not a chance."
"Apple?" His arm reached past mine and showed me the red fruit in his hand once more.
"Not a chance." I repeated bluntly.
"Allow me to rephrase that Lori" Tex sighed indignantly. "You eat this and you can put some clothes on. Otherwise I might just stay home and enjoy you some more." Without hesitation, I snatched it from his hand and held it up to gesture I had it. My blood ran cold of him doing exactly what he threatened when I still ached as if he was still going at it. It was a pain I would never adjust to. "There's a good girl. Isn't life much easier when you do as you're told?" I resisted holding up my middle finger and sourly bit into the apple instead, its juice bringing relief to my burning throat almost immediately but it was not something I would vocalise to him. "Oh back to the sulking and here I found you a whole new wardrobe." I knew that would be nothing to be grateful for. "Unless you'd rather stay-"
"No." I did not want to remain naked and he knew it.
"Didn't think so." He snickered, "you can be my very own model."
"You're going to make me sick again." I warned flatly smacking his hand off my leg as he tried to stroke it. It was an action which only caused further laughter as my skin crawled, my body giving off a distinct shudder.
"Bet you modelled for Joel."
"I trusted Joel." It was something that didn't seem to ever occur to him. Joel hadn't been violent or pushy. He hadn't killed or maimed anybody while this was a daily occurence in this house.
"Ain't my fault you're hostile honey."
"It's entirely your fault." I bit back.
"Well, maybe slightly." Tex chortled again, tracing his fingers over my flesh despite trying to push him off and feeling his breath against my ear. My chest tightened and my heart pounded at the fear of him wanting a repeat of last night. "But you're still gonna be my star."