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Tsukishima's POV:
Over the last few weeks I've been doing everything in my power to stop thinking about Y/n and the... kiss, I've tried music, sleeping, studying, homework even playing volleyball to get my mind of it, but it doesn't work. I just keep analysing and thinking about everything because all of it confuses me. Nothing makes sense, my feelings, my thoughts, what I'm meant to do. It all confuses me, and that pisses me off.
I never really struggle with my thoughts and actions because I always just think and do the most logical thing but I... don't know what to do that is most logical and it's annoying me that I don't know and that my thoughts are all messy.
My feelings are the worst part of this all. I never really feel such complicated and ambitious emotions so I never really have to struggle with them. But after I kissed Y/n all these indescribable emotions that I can't place or figure out have come to the top and I'm scared because I've felt them sneak up on me for a long time but I ignored them and pushed them deep down and now... I feel like I can't. But I don't know what they mean, I thought I liked Yachi but... I'm no longer sure that's how I feel.
The worst thing is, Y/n is avoiding me, I figured it was because she was embarrassed but I thought by now she would talk to me about it or at least pretend it never happened and she hasn't. Usually, I would just force her to talk to me but for some reason, I don't think that's the right thing to do because she'll freak out, I need to wait for her to come to me. But at this point, she's taking it way to far, she hasn't talked to me in weeks. I'm not sure what I need to do for her to speak to me.
As I was walking to my room to go to bed after a long day of training I was stopped by Kuroo who wanted me to do a few blocks. Of course he did. I refused at first until he annoyed me so I agreed to do it.
I was playing with him and these two guys from Fukurodani, Bokuto and Akaashi. As we were playing Kuroo kept on giving me weird looks, like he knew something. I ignored Kuroo's creepiness but his friend Bokuto was also annoying, he was complaining about my blocks which for some reason REALLY made me angry but I tried to brush it off because I was not in the mood to argue.
When Kuroo pointed out that I don't put my "all" into blocks and that Hinata would take up all the glory for himself I told him the truth about the fact Hinata is a much better player than I am and had a lot more potential, luckily before he could say anything else a few of Kuroo's teammates came to play so I left angrily
As I left the gym I heard footsteps behind me, I tried to ignore them in hopes he would give up and go away but he didn't so I turned around annoyed and looked at Kuroo who had a smile
"What do you want now?" I asked him trying to not be angry
"Woah woah calm down big guy," he said with a laugh as he put his hands out like he was protecting himself. I rolled my eyes at him and he just grinned "I'm not here to talk more about your bad views on volleyball"
"What do you want to talk to me about then?" I asked confused
"Y/n," he said and looked around a little flustered
"What do you mean?" I asked confused as I scratched my face trying to not show I was nervous
"I think you know," he said as he smirked and I glared at him
"She told you?!" I said a little mad and he sighed
"You're not her only friend. Of course she did" Kuroo said as he rolled his eyes at me, I crossed my arms angrily "Y/n is really worried about you. She feels terrible about kissing you because she thinks she's like Oikawa, she thinks you're mad at her. I personally believe that you're avoiding her because you're just confused, but you know what she's like," Kuroo said and I looked at him shocked and confused
She thinks I'm avoiding her? She thinks I'm mad at her? She thinks she's like Oikawa? What?
Suddenly everything made a little bit more sense and I felt mad at myself for not figuring it out sooner
"Of course she does," I said as I sighed and he smiled knowing he was right the whole time
"I knew you weren't mad at her!" Kuroo said happily
"She's such an over-thinker" I mumbled as I tried to think about what to do
"I know right," Kuroo said with a laugh and I looked at him almost smiling... almost.
"Yknow, I wasn't avoiding her she was the one avoiding me," I said and he chuckled
"Of course," he said through his laugh and then sighed a little at Y/n's actions "She hasn't changed at all," he said and I looked at him curiously
I know Kuroo and Y/n met each other two years ago when she went to live in Wales but she hasn't told me how deep their relationship goes, I figured they were close but it just seems like there's more to it, nothing romantic but... I cant quite put my finger on exactly what it is. It was weird because I felt waves of jealousy over the fact that he probably knew Y/n better than me, but maybe that was only because Y/n knows me better than anyone and I'm not the one that knows her best.
"Can you tell me more about Wales and her?" I asked nervously, I expected him to gloat about me asking him or smirk or just make it difficult for me but instead he just got super serious and anxious
"I can't," he said as he rubbed the back of his neck "It's not for me to say" I raised my eyebrow wanting to know more "I'm sure you've already figured out a few things but you should just let her tell you when she's ready... she hasn't even really told me"
I nodded my head and turned around "I'll see you tomorrow," I said as I began to walk away
"Wait! Tsukishima, do you... like Y/n?" Kuroo asked seriously but in a way that he already knew the answer. I stood still shocked
What an abrupt question to ask, who just asks that? What does he even expect me to say? What should I say? Do I? What the hell do I mean do I? In what way does he mean? I think I already know
I didn't answer him and continued walking, I could hear him laugh a little bit before walking away, I sighed relieved before I made my way to the dorms
Y/n's POV:
I woke up to my alarm and forgot where I was as I started hitting my phone to turn it off. When I realised I was in a room filled with other girls I stopped embarrassed and sat up immediately
I looked around worried but noticed I was all alone. Everyone was gone.
Huh?
Where is everyone?
Is there some sort of zombie apocalypse
Because I didn't go to the last training camp and I was pretty avoidant yesterday since I was embarrassed about my Smurf onesie, I hadn't really talked to the other managers. I felt sad that I had sort of isolated myself from them but Yachi and Kiyoko were already so close with them and I didn't want to make them uncomfortable. I still thought I would have at least been woken up though
I got changed into my gym shorts and a T-shirt, I contemplated taking my Karasuno jacket but I figured it would be too hot
No Smurf onesie for me today!
It's way too hot for that
And maybe I shouldn't have worn it in the first place... HAHAHA NO! No ragrets! (Iykyk)
I opened the door slightly and peeked out to see two hallways leading different ways
Where do I go?
What time is it?
I looked down at my phone tiredly to realise it was breakfast time
Wow I actually woke up pretty early
In time for breakfast
This is amazing
I feel like a new person-
Focus Y/n focus!
Everyone will be in the dining area
Where is that again?
God Y/n this is why you listen when you're shown around
I groaned in annoyance before I started walking around trying to listen for shouting or screaming or anything that came from the team.
My legs are sore from all this walking
Why is this place so big?
Oh right, it's a training centre
Luckily, I eventually managed to hear Noya's loud voice and followed it to the dining room. I sighed in relief as I walked in
I looked at everyone eating breakfast and got nervous. I walked into the kitchen where the managers were and looked at them all as they handed out the food
"Morning Y/n!" A girl with pigtails said and I looked at her nervously as I didn't know her name
What's her name again?
Why am I so good at remembering faces but not names
I mean, I don't necessarily have to say her name
"Morning!" I said with a smile and all of the managers looked at me, noticing I was here.
"We were going to wake you but we didn't know if you would get annoyed" a tall girl said and I wanted to shoot myself in the head at the awkward atmosphere
"Well I'm not a morning person but I'm not on my period so I wouldn't have bitten your hand off, don't worry!" I said nervously laughing and they all just stood there blankly, some were trying to smile at my "joke" but failing cause it wasn't funny
Why do I always tell period jokes when I'm nervous?
This is so EMBARRASSING
I need to get out of here
"You guys look like you have this under control... I'm just gonna..." I said as I began walking away trying to feel the doors of the exit "Go!" I said as I felt them and quickly pushed them open as I walked out
So embarrassing
So embarrassing
So embarrassing
I'm going to die
I sped walked past everyone with a red face until someone grabbed my wrist stopping me
"Where are you going?" Kuroo asked looking up at me confused
"To meet Whitney Houston," I said with a smile and he stared up at me concerned and worried "I'm joking!"
"Sit, eat," Kuroo said as he grabbed a spare chair and placed it next to his, he pulled me down on the seat as he gave me one of Lev's many bowls of rice
I groaned as I put my head on the table
"I wouldn't do that if I were you, the guys here are weird, I saw a few of them lick up their food off the table," Kuroo said and I shot my head up and away from the table
"GROSS!" I shouted as I moved my chair back a little
He started to laugh evilly "I'm joking,". I squinted my eyes at him as I tried to kill him with my eyes
"Funny," I said annoyed and he tapped the bowl of rice as he gave me a look and I sighed as I picked up chopsticks
I usually have cereal for breakfast but rice is... ok
It's good I'm trying different things for breakfast! My therapist will be proud
Plus I eat rice for lunch so it's basically just another lunch and not breakfast
I'm okay
I ate the rice nervously and as fast as I could so that I wouldn't give myself the chance to think of it too much. I also wanted to get out of here because it was way too loud and since I'm never up this early on a weekend I had a major headache. Also, there were SO many people here so it was like 10x louder than what it's usually like when I'm with the team
How are they so energised this early?
ON A WEEKEND?
I wonder what they're like at dinner
I put my bowl down from my face as I finished all my rice, I looked up and staring into my soul with lovesick eyes was Bokuto who was NOT there before. I almost spat my rice out from surprise but managed to swallow it even though I almost died
"Oh... you," I said coughing from the rice and he smiled
"No no YOU," he said as he pointed at me and I looked at him confused "Just YOU," he said happily and I nodded my head concerned as I slowly looked at Kuroo who just shrugged
"Right," I said as I stood up and he looked at me sadly
"Leaving so soon?" He asked with a pout
"Yeah... I suddenly don't like this table," I said and then began walking away
"OH, COME ON!" I heard Bokuto shout, I laughed a little as I left the dining room
I went to go set up the gym with a tired coach Ukai
"Y/n this is your and the other manager's job! Why do I have to do it?" He yawned as he tied a net to a post
"Because all the managers cooked breakfast while I slept! I need to do something to repay them!" I said as I got the volleyballs
And to show that I'm not a nuisance or a liability
"And what does that have to do with me?" He asked grumpy
"Well, I can't do it all alone and I knew you'd help because you're so great!" I said with a big smile and he looked at me with a straight face not believing me "I maybe- sorta... don't know how to tie the nets to the poles," I said nervously and his mouth dropped open
"YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO YOUR MOST IMPORTANT MANAGER JOB?!" He shouted shocked
"ITS COMPLICATED!" I shouted back as I got more poles and nets set up for him to tie "Also filling water bottles is way more important because they can't play if they're thirsty!"
"They can't play if there are no nets!" He shouted and I opened my eyes wide
"Good point," I said and he smiled proudly before I pointed at the nets for him to tie and his face dropped exhausted
"I'll do the rest but your gonna have to learn!" He said as he sighed and I nodded my head frantically
Soon all the teams arrived and I returned to my place on the bench as I watched the team fail, again, again, again and again. I was getting so tired of seeing them running
"Ukai why do I need to be here if they just keep running up that damn hill?" I asked him and he looked at me madly
"Y/n you are MORE than welcome to go home," he said and I tried to hide a laugh
"Nah, I'm here now," I said as I put my elbows on my knees and put my head on my hands as I tried to get a sort of rest
He groaned at what I said and I laughed a little as I found my new source of entertainment: annoying Coach Ukai
"Ukai why can't I go to bed?" I asked and he sighed as he leaned back on the bench annoyed
"Because if I have to be awake then so do you," he said as he tried to focus on the team playing another match
"Ukai why couldn't we bring Shortcake?" I asked and he squeezed his eyes shut
"Tsukishima said that she's still too small!" he said as he leaned forward trying to ignore my presence
"Ukai why is it so hot here?" I asked and he ignored me, I asked him a few more questions and they got dumber and dumber the more questions I asked
"Ukai why is the sky blue?" I asked and he looked at me exhausted and I couldn't keep it in as I laughed
"Y/n why are you so annoying?" He asked as he looked at me and I smiled wide
"Ukai why do you think I'm annoying?" I asked innocently like I hadn't just been trying to annoy him
"Y/n... go- go do something else that doesn't include you sitting here," he said and I sat up straight surprised
"Like what?" I asked and he groaned as he tried to think of what I could do that would take me a long time
"Go and count how many water battles there are," he said as he pointed at the baskets and baskets of water bottles
"Your joking, right?" I asked shocked and he looked at me seriously "ok! Jeez!" I said as I rolled my eyes and stood up, I walked over to the water bottles with a slouch
I looked around and groaned as I realised it wasn't just these water bottles, there were a ton of rogue water bottles scattered around the gym
Why did I have to annoy Coach Ukai
Bad Y/n
Stupid Y/n
I started my count of the water bottles that were in the baskets. When I had counted 30 some of the managers came in with watermelon for the team. I looked at the watermelon in glory but my happiness was stopped as I looked over slightly to see Coach Ukai shaking his head saying I wasn't allowed to stop, I groaned and then went back to counting
I counted 50 water bottles in the crates and then went on to the rogue ones
I started with the ones in the gym, I ran about finding water bottles hidden everywhere. The teams were still outside enjoying their delicious watermelon, I cursed them as I occasionally walked past the doors but had to keep focus on my mission
After I counted the rogue water bottles in the gym I went outside to count the ones that were actually being used
Maybe someone will even give me watermelon!
Everyone was giving me weird looks as I went around them all like a bee. Although they were weirded out they just shook it off and continued eating their watermelon
Suddenly my counting was stopped as I saw something — I saw Tsukishima and Yachi talking to each other. Laughing with each other. Smiling at each other.
I stood still and watched their actions intently, Tsukishima looked happy and Yachi looked nervous. They looked so good with each other, a perfect couple. I felt this strong emotion consume me as I watched them.
This emotion was so overwhelming, I couldn't bare it, I didn't like it. Before it got even stronger I turned around and walked away trying to not grab attention from anyone. I turned a corner quickly and sighed as I kept walking, thoughts clouding my mind.
Suddenly my phone started ringing, I stopped walking and got my phone out of my pocket with my shaking hands as this emotion went all the way down to my fingertips.
It was Oikawa, his contact name appearing on my phone again and again no matter how many times I asked him to leave me alone, made me mad. For the first time Oikawa's constant nagging made me mad and not feel pity or sadness for him.
I answered the phone and didn't even let him talk as I started shouting at him angrily. All my sense was gone as all I thought about was Kei and Yachi
"Oikawa when I said goodbye, I meant it! Stop calling and texting me and especially stop coming to my house! Move on! Leave me alone! I don't want to be your friend anymore and I don't love you! I don't know how else I'm meant to tell you!" I shouted into the phone, I hung up before he could say anything
I took a deep breath and tried to calm down as I looked at my shaking hand.
As soon as I realised what I had said to Oikawa a different, stronger emotion swarmed me. Guilt.
What did I just do?
How could I be so horrible?
I need to call him back and apologise
Before I could click his number someone interrupted me
"Y/n" his voice made my blood run cold with nerves
I turned around slowly and as soon as I looked Tsukishima in the eyes my face went red
"Kei," I said nervously as I avoided eye contact
"We need to talk," he said and a cold chill went down my spine as I gulped
.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙ ✩ *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .
No big authors note at the end of the chapter? Strange
If you like watermelon then press the star ⭐️ down below 🍉🍉🍉