"Everyone's so nice here," Ellie said, brushing one hand through her hair.
"I told you you'd like them, didn't I?" She smiled, nodding her head vigorously.
Ellie's leg had almost healed entirely due to her treatment at the infirmary, and was up and walking around. She wasn't fit to go on runs or anything, but she was enthusiastic about helping, so Maggie gave her a farming job.
"How's your ears?" She said, trying to keep the conversation going.
"I can hear you fine." Jane said, which awarded another smile from Ellie.
Feeling a light pressure on her head, Jane reached her hands up to check what was resting lopsided on her skull.
Running her fingers along the rim of what appeared to be a hat, she smiled to herself, taking it off and looking back. To no one's surprise, it was Carl grimes that she saw walking away from the scene. Without a hat.
Fixing the stature, she nodded to Ellie and they went their separate ways, Ellie giggling like a school girl as she made her way back towards her crops.
Running up to Carl, she placed his hat back on his head, as he burst out into laughter.
"It's not that funny, carl." She said, but even she couldn't help but crack a smile at him.
It had been about four days since their arrival at Alexandria, and even still, Jane couldn't get enough of anyone. It felt like she was living in some dreamworld that she had concocted in a stingy old barn somewhere. But it wasn't, it was real, and they were real. And she just didn't seem to believe it.
"I was going to ask you," he said, taking a deep breath, "if you wanted to go over the walls with me today."
She grimaced, because she hadn't been past the walls since they even got here. Pulling herself together, she was reminded that then, ellie and her were both terribly injured and surrounded by walkers. Now, both her and Carl were righteously equipped with guns, knives and were nursed back to full health.
"Race you," she said, before sprinting off to a spot in the wall that Jane had watched Enid climb multiple times before.
"Hey!" He shouted out, but she was too far now to even hear him. Steadying her footing on the metal bars, she began to climb - quickly at that. Within a few seconds she was up and over, whilst Carl was just hovering above the ground on the other side.
It took him a few minutes to climb up, almost loosing his footing a few times. How the hell is she so agile? He thought, because he still thought of her as the frail girl he grew up with, the one that had killed only one walker.
He was yet to learn she was much more than that, because as he cleared over the wall and made a risky leap down, his mouth fell agape.
Around 10 walkers lay motionless in the dead grass, some pierced by arrows, others slit by knives. Carl turned his head to look at his girl, speckled with a light dusting of walker blood.
She wasn't panting, in-fact - she hadn't even broken a sweat.
"Someone hasn't been on lookout." She said, not even addressing Carl's shock and walking right past him.
He shook himself off. Of course she can kill a few walkers, she was out there on her own. He felt stupid for even dismissing this fact, one which he had to now accept fully: Jane was changed.
She cleaned off her knife on her shirt as Carl caught up to her, resting a hand on her shoulder.
"You're pretty good with that thing," he said, almost out of breath.
"Yeah. Lot of practice."
Moments passed and the two stayed silent. Carl didn't want to pry, but he also wanted to know. He wanted to know the ins and outs, the qualities of her new character. He wanted to know how she became this way. I mean, he had heard the story back at the grimes's house. But it was vague, and somewhat cut down.
He thought maybe he shouldn't say these words, but he couldn't stop himself. They came tumbling out before he could even think about it. Whether he would regret this or thank it, he was about to find out.
"You're different now."
Giving him a ruthless side eye, she racked her brain, finding only one question that would fit the narrative:
"In a Good way or a Bad way?"
The question had so many answers than just good or bad. There were too many loopholes, too many cons. But, taking a deep breath, he answered truthfully.
"I'm glad you can handle yourself now. I'm not so thrilled about the part where you were gone for 2 years, or, the part where you had to go through whatever you did that you aren't telling me."
She stopped, turning her head to face him. They stood in the middle of the road, surrounded by trees and greenery. She was going to say something quick and mean at him, but she stopped, realising exactly who she was talking to. She couldn't be mad at him for long, because every time she looked at him, she felt a relief of indescribable affection. Every time they locked eyes she just wanted to wrap her arms around him like she had four days ago.
"You really want to know?"
He nodded hesitantly, like he wasn't sure.
"Awhile after I met Ellie, we were switching from house to house to stay safe from raiders. We never stayed in one place more than a day. We found this town, completely deserted. We set up camp, and everything was fine. Then, in the middle of the night, some men showed up. We hid quick enough that they didn't find me, but....they found Ellie. They were going to....to.."
It felt like she couldn't speak. She didn't want to cry, or scream. But no sound wanted to physically come out of her mouth.
Pushing her eyes closed, she moved past the lump in her throat. She had never talked about it out loud before.
"They were going to do things to Ellie and me. But they had Ellie, so they....started on her first. And, all I could see was red. I wiped them all out and left the last guy to die."
Jane noticed the moment Carl's eyes softened as he listened to what she was saying.
"After that, we found Oceanside. We lived a safe life, somewhat. Until the men came back. They bombed us, and asked for me personally. I handed myself over before anyone else got hurt, but they ordered to shoot anyways. They killed people because of me."
"You were just protecting her. You did nothing wrong." He said, inching closer towards her.
"You should've seen the way I murdered them." She said, and chills multiplied down his spine, the words spiked and sharp.
"Stop." He said, and she finally looked into his eye - to find that it was glistened with a single tear.
Wrapping his arms around her, she melted into the embrace. She buried her head in the crook of his neck and wrapped her arms around his back.
She had never really even seen Carl cry, the only exception being his happy tears at their reunion.
She hated seeing him like this - she just wanted to wrap him up in a blanket and protect him from everything bad in the world.
Of course, he was crying for her. For her or because of her? These days the line seemed to blur all too often.
After their moment, they continued on with their walking and exploring. Killing about three walkers, Carl lead the way, Jane following close behind.
"So tell me about terminus? Rick mentioned it, but, never said anything more."
"It was a disaster. We got there, and we all thought that maybe it was someplace safe. That's where we reunited with everyone. Then, we found out it was run by a bunch of cannibals."
"Holy shit...." She said, looking at him with deep concern.
"No, we were fine. Carol saved us." Jane couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was, but the way carl said her mothers name made her recoil a little.
"I was disappointed because I thought you'd be there, you know - with her. But you weren't. And then she..." carl trailed off, scratching at the back of his neck.
"She what?" Carl wished he had just kept his mouth shut, because the aftermath of this conversation wasn't going to be pretty.
"She...uhm. She said that she didn't want to look for you. She thought there was no point in trying because of what happened to Sofia."
Jane said nothing, staying absolutely stark still.
"I might have protested a little violently, nothing out of the abnormal. I was mad. I haven't really talked to her since." He said, and Jane felt his fingers slowly interlock with hers. She was glad he was here, she always was. But finally, she had someone next to her who cared.
She didn't really even feel any anger or sadness. She just felt a little lost. I guess, all the pain and trauma had just become too much, and there was no room left for anymore. Carl waited for her to lash out, or, start crying. But she didn't. She just kept on walking like nothing mattered.
Later, they reinvested in small talk, making sure to not come back around to any serious topics.
"Holy shit!" Jane exclaimed out of the blue, startling Carl, making him raise his gun at absolutely nothing. Pushing his gun down with her free hand, Jane laughed, and pointed ahead of them. A car sat perfectly pristine in-front of them, doors open on all sides.
She clambered in, looking for a key.
"Found it!" Carl said, holding it up in the air from where he was standing.
"Where? How!?" She said, a smile plastered across her face.
"I felt it under my boot as I was walking. It was under a pile of leaves."
He got in the drivers seat, thrusting the key into the ignition. Turning it steadily, it snapped in two, falling onto the car's floor.
"What the fuck?" He said, picking it up.
"No problem." Jane said, getting down on her knees beside Carl and feeling around the back of the glove box for a wire.
Carl blushed slightly, her placement being conveniently close to him. He was ashamed of liking what he saw - he didn't want to take advantage of her - so he hid his face with his hat.
After a few minutes, she came back up to look at him, two wires present and twirled together between her fingertips.
"Ta dah. Rewired."
Confused as to why his face was covered, she took the hat gently off his head and placed it on hers, getting up to sit in the seat next to him.
"You're bright red." She said bluntly.
"I know, I know, I'm sorry," he put his face in his hands, still deeply ashamed.
Grabbing his wrists, she pried them away from his face, and then leaned in, for the first time since carol's dinner.
Their lips connected, but this time, roughly.
Thinking of their conversations earlier today, neither Jane nor carl predicted this would be the outcome of their trip.
It was like all the hunger and starvation they had felt in the past months had just caught up to them, because they couldn't get enough. Kissing and sucking, the couple (if you could even call them that) didn't stop.
Jane was almost on-top of Carl when she broke away, glancing up at the sky briefly.
"It's getting dark. We should get home." She said, kissing Carl once more before retreating back to her seat.
"You sure you know how to drive?" She said, and he made a funny face. It felt good to laugh again, and Carl always made her laugh harder than anyone. That was one thing she missed incredibly when he was gone.
They talked and laughed the whole way, it seemed their make out session had lifted their spirits.
"Your dad asked me to fight. In this saviours versus hilltop thing they got going on." She said, staring out the open window.
"With you on our side, I doubt we'll lose."
She smiled at him, though she didn't really know if she wanted to or not. Was fighting really her thing?
"Are you going to fight?"
"Im doing what I can." He said, keeping his eyes on the road. She nodded. Valid, she thought.
They got home to Alexandria with only a few bumps in the road. (Carl crashed into a tree and they had to walk the rest of the way home.)
When they had finally gotten back to Alexandria, it was completely dark. The people on watch didn't hesitate to open the gates for the two teens, because standing inside of them was Carol and Rick.
"Oh my god," Carol said, running to embrace Jane. She successfully wrapped her arms around her daughter, but she didn't hug back.
Rick did the same to Carl, but he welcomed it.
"Where the hell have you two been?" He said, his accent protruding through his parted lips.
"Sorry, we just got carried away," Jane said, and to everyone's surprise, she started to laugh.
Even Carl looked to her with an expression of confusion and judgement. She kept laughing, not being able to get a word out. She eventually managed to muster a 'Carl crashed into a tree' very slowly and chaotically.
He rolled his eyes, but started to laugh also. The parents didn't seem to find it funny at all.
They were ushered inside and rushed off to bed - Jane especially. Rick told her they were going to hilltop tomorrow, and that she needed to be ready.
She quickly got changed into her sleeping clothes (one of rosita's comfy two pieces) and was about to get into bed beside Ellie, but stopped when she heard a light knock at the door.
The door opened with a start, and there stood Carl grimes - wearing a T-shirt and some ugly looking basketball shorts. Although, he did seem to pull them off. Really, he could pull off anything.
"Goodnight," he said, leaning down to place a kiss on the top of her forehead. She beamed at him, pulling him into their millionth hug since the reunion.
Letting go, she watched him retreat back the hall to his bedroom before closing the door. Daryl had explained earlier that when they got to Alexandria, they didn't trust anyone else, so they all stayed in the same two houses instead of splitting up. I guess it just stuck, because here Jane was, sleeping in Ellie and her's shared room, which was conveniently next to Carl's and Carol's rooms.
Carol. Mom.
Earlier, she didn't want to think about what she had told. She didn't want to believe it. But now the thoughts were flooding in, and all she could do was try to filter them out. They'd just have to wait till the morning.
★
In the morning, Rick, Daryl, Maggie, Glenn, Rosita and Jane all got ready to leave for hilltop.
Maggie had given her a lot of hand-me-downs, including different pieces like holsters and belts. She found an interesting holster that she wore like a waistcoat, clipping it in the front.
The last touch was Rick Grimes's murder jacket.
Carl had told Jane all about it. It was the one he wore whilst killing all those people at terminus.
The fact doesn't weaken her, in-fact, it makes her proud to be the one that has it. She was going to be just like him, a leader. A killer. She already was.
Packing the last few things in their truck, she closed the hood, it slamming down with a click. She looked up to see everyone had emptied into the cars ahead, Maggie, glenn, Daryl and Rosita in the four seater - which left just her and rick to drive the truck.
Before getting in, she felt a tap on her shoulder. Carl grimes stood with open arms, and she didn't hesitate to wrap herself up in them.
"Be safe, okay?" Jane said, taking off his hat and ruffling his hair.
"I'll be fine. You be safe." He said, smiling.
Rick watched the teens in the reflection of his wing mirror, chuckling to himself. He was glad Carl had finally got her back, because that meant Rick would get the real Carl back. He wasn't really unhappy anymore, which took one more worry off of Rick's shoulders.
Usually, when you see someone with your kid like that, you don't like it. You think that no one is good enough for them. But Jane is. She's more than good enough.
It's like the kids have a mutual understanding between each other - They just know one another so well. Jane was special to Carl, and he could see why. Rick saw potential in her too - leader potential. Fighter potential.
Rick couldn't be happier for his son.
★
Heyyyyyyy guys sorry this took ages to write, it's kinda just a filler lol ♡'･ᴗ･'♡
Thank you for all the reads, ily guys!!!! Some cool stuff is coming so get ready. We're gonna get some Carol angst 😔😔😔