I found this picture on the wiki.
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AN: Yo, what's up? Here's the next chapter, I hope you enjoy. Special thanks to FujiCake22 for compliments, Jlm119 for adding my story to awesome stuff, and Deusblade for sticking around since the beginning. And yes, that was a JoJo reference Deusblade. Shotgundad, answering if Techno will kill orphans would be spoilers, so no comment. Localnarrator, I'm going to reiterate here, Gideon is going to get drop-kicked again.
Well, I think that's everything, so without further ado, Techno's shenanigans in gravity falls.
Discord: https://discord.gg/eSSP2GtYQS
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Technoblade sat on his porch, sipping on some freshly brewed tea and reading a book of Greek mythology. Phil had taught the Piglin how to brew tea years before, and Techno raised his glass to the crowfather. Techno was at peace, letting the Friday waste away idly. Because Techno was chilling, it wasn't surprising when the voices began yelling for his attention.
Hmyes: Techno! Techno! Techno! Tecjno! Techno!
Technofan12321: Yo Techno, I think Hmyes needs you
D.austrian:@Technofan12321, ja
Bananamilkshake: Techno, The guy that knows whats going on is panicking, halp
Average_techno_fan: Techno, come pick me up, I'm scared
"What is it, Hmyes?"
Hmyes: tonight is Summerween, you can go into town and get free candy.
"Heh? What is that?"
Hmyes: the people of Gravity falls like Halloween so much, they do it twice.
"Isn't Halloween all-hallows eve? Specifically on the date where the natural barriers between life and death are on average at their weakest, hence why all the supernatural stuff that ends to happen. If I remember correctly, one of my champions lost one of his eyes on a Halloween night. Are the barriers weaker tonight in Oregon?"
Hmyes: The barriers aren't weaker, they just like candy
Bananamilkshake: @Hmyes based
Carpediem: @Hmyes candy is pog
"I would assume they wear costumes?"
Hmyes: Hm, Yes.
Yodasstick: So no disguise needed
Def_not_a_stoner: Let's go steal candy from orphans!
Technofan12321: @Def_not_a_stoner, sadly there's no orphanage in gravity falls
Def_not_a_stoner: @Technofan12321 sadge
Average_techno_fan: @Technofan12321 not poggers
"I assume if I don't go into town tonight, you are going to be bothering me all night?" Techno asked the voices rhetorically.
Bananamilkshake: yup
ChadwickChadeusChaddington: Indubitably, my good sir.
Technofan12321: you know us so well
"Alright. I'm going to go see if the pines twins are going trick-or-treating since I'm going out anyways."
Average_techno_fan: and not because you want to check up on Tommy 2: Swearless boogaloo?
"Nah."
Pathoftheswole: Cap.
Bananamilkshake: double Cap.
Yallneedhelp: guys, let big brothernoblade pretend to have a different reason.
"Bruhhhh."
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I'm so excited!" a brown haired girl with braces and a sweater exclaimed.
"We're gonna have the best costumes, get the most candy," her twin brother started before being interrupted by his sister.
"and have the biggest stomach aches ever!"
"Yeah!"
The twins high-five before a superhero sitting behind them in a recliner comments on their enthusiasm. "Dude, I've never seen you guys so pumped."
"Well Soos, back at home, me and Dipper were kind of the kings of trick-or-treating." Mabel said, digging out her scrapbook, showing Soos pictures of them dressed as cats, salt and pepper, and zombies. "Twins in costumes, the people eat it up."
"Well, you dudes better be careful out there. It's a night of ghosts and goblins, not to mention..." Soos paused dramatically before killing the lights and pointing a flashlight at his face, "the Summerween Trickster."
"The summer-what-wha?" Mabel asked.
Dipper reached for the journal, but before he grabbed it Soos continued. "The Summerween Trickster goes door to door, so the legend goes, eating children who lack the Summerween spirit."
"Well, you don't have to worry about us. We've got spirit to go around." Dipper says as he throws a piece of candy into his mouth. Dipper began coughing and Soos hurriedly turns on the lights. "Ugh! What is this stuff? I've never even heard of these brands before. Sand-pop? Gummy chairs? Mr. adequate bar?"
"This is all cheap-o loser candy!" Mabel exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air.
"Quiet your discontent children, lest the Trickster overhear." warned Soos, looking dramatically off into the distance.
Dipper grabbed his bowl of candy and walked past Soos, "Your cape is stuck in your fly, Soos."
Soos leaned over to check if his cape was caught in his fly, and when he saw it was, Soos began looking dramatically off into the distance while saying, "Touche." before eating a gummie that was stuck on his belly.
"Goodbye loser candy!" Dipper said as he threw it out of the kitchen window. Unbeknownst to him, in the woods right outside the clearing in which the shack sat, something was breathing heavily and approaching the door.
Suddenly, the doorbell rang, and Grunkle Stan yelled from further inside the house, "Trick-or-treators! Quick, give 'em the terrible candy!"
Dipper walked over to the door with half the bowl of candy remaining and opened it. "Happy Summerween!" he said as he looked at the person who had rung the doorbell. It was a tall, broad shouldered man with a brown cloak wrapped around him and covering his head. "Techno! What are you up to?"
"Silencing the voices."
"What?"
"Don't worry about it."
"Ooo-kay. Would you like some candy, I guess?"
"Sure. Are you going trick-or-treating tonight?"
"Yeah! Me and Mabel are going as peanut butter and jelly. Would you like to join us?"
"That's... why I'm here."
Dipper gestured Techno inside, barely closing the door before the doorbell was rung again.
"More Suckers! Dipper, quickly, the loser candy!" bellowed Stan from his bathroom where he was putting the finishing touches on his costume. Techno took a step away from the door and Dipper opened it.
"Happy Summerw-Ahhh!" Dipper shouted and spilled the candy bowl at who was outside. Standing right outside the shack's door was Wendy Corduroy, Dipper's crush, and Robbie Valentino, Wendy's boyfriend and a massive jerk.
" 'Sup Squirt?" Robbie greeted, before noticing a cloaked figure standing off to one side.
"Hey Dipper!" greeted Wendy.
"Wendy! Ha Ha!" said Dipper as he walked inside and accidently into the staircase. "Ow... What-What's up guys?"
"I left my jacket here. Again." said Wendy, grabbing the offending article of clothing.
"What's up with the candy? You going trick-or-treating, or something?" Robbie asked Dipper. "And who's tall, dark, and creepy?"
"Robbie! Be nice." Wendy reprimanded. Before she could continue lecturing Robbie, Techno broke into the conversation.
"Who am I? Wouldn't you like to know."
"Wait, that voice... Oh no!" Robbie said before running away.
"Wait, Robbie!" Wendy shouted after him. "Huh, I wonder what that was all about. Anyways, there's a party tonight at Tambry's place and it's gonna be OFF THE CHAIN! You should come, Dipper." Wendy said handing over a flier describing the party before chasing after her boyfriend. The flier had a jack-o-melon, and claimed it wasn't S+P approved, and that no photo's had better end up online. The flier also said the party started at 9:00 PM.
Dipper was faced with a decision; either go trick-or-treating with Mabel, or go to the party with Wendy. Techno noticed his Student struggling whether to stay with his twin or follow his heart.
"Hm, if only you get all your trick-or-treatin' done before nine, then you could do both."
Dipper looked at Techno in shock, not realizing his conflict was so obvious or that there was such an easy solution.
"What? I have two younger brothers, this isn't the first time I've done something like this."
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Chat, upon hearing Techno was using big brother experience, started freaking out.
Average_techno_fan: Big Brothernoblade!
Technofan12321: Adoptnoblade!
Carpediem: He admits it, he admits he views dipper as a younger brother.
Def_not_a_stoner: Wooo baby, that's what I've been waiting for, that's what it's all about!
Yodasstick: *star wars episode VI victory celebration*
Bananamilkshake: Let's a fuckin-GOOOO!
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"Mabel, Techno's coming with us tonight." Dipper told Mabel and her friends as he rushed upstairs to get changed. Mabel was dressed up as a jar of strawberry jelly, Grenda Grendinator was dressed as a witch, and Candy Chiu was dressed up as a piece of candy.
"Okay Bro-bro."
"Who's Techno!?"
"I also am wondering."
"Girls, meet Tecchno! He's Dip-Dop's trainer. He's good at fighting" Mabel explained to her friends
"Cool!" Grenda said. "My name's Grenda!"
"It is nice to meet you. My name is Candy."
"Nice to meet y'all." Techno said, before he felt footsteps approaching from the living room. Techno jumped up onto the ceiling right before Grunkle Stan walked in. Stan was in a stereotypical vampire costume, complete with cape and cane.
"Grunkle Stan! Meet my best friends, Candy and Grenda!"
"I am so sweet, I could eat myself."
"Hello, Mr. Pines!"
"You got a cold, honey? Something wrong with your voice there?" Stan asked, concerned.
"What do you mean? Why would you say that?" asked Grenda, taking offense. Stan turned around, and, with a flourish of his cape, sped walked back into the living room. Techno dropped from the ceiling, landing next to Grenda.
"Is Waddles coming with us?" Candy asked.
"I wish he could, but he's got some very important meetings to attend!" Mabel responded. Having heard his name, Waddles waddled into room, dressed in a rather dapper suit and tie. "File these documents under 'I', for 'I have a curly tail'!" Waddles snorted, and Techno looked at him strangely, before pulling out a potato from his inventory and throwing it to Waddles. Waddles caught the low-protein projectile in mid-air, grunting happily before lying on his side and eating it. The girls looked at Techno strangely, and he just shrugged.
"What?"
Before Mabel could ask what had passed between the Piglin and the pig, Dipper came downstairs, dressed as a jar of peanut butter.
"Aww, you two are so cute!" Candy exclaimed. (You have no idea how tempting it was to put her saying Kawaii here)
"AHH! Your cuteness makes me want to BREAK something!" the Grendinator shouted.
"You dudes have, like, the greatest costume I've ever seen." Soos said as he walked out of the living room.
"Girls, Soos, we're professionals. We're twins, after all! It's only natural to get along with your twin.
"Alright, everybody ready to trick-or-treat?" Dipper asked, getting a response of whoo's. "Alright, let's go!" Candy, Grenda, Soos, and Dipper charged out the front door for glory and sweets, while Mabel paused.
"Grunkle Stan, we're going trick-or-treating, have fun scaring children!" Mabel shouted into the shack.
"Thanks sweetie, have fun! Stay safe!" Stan called back, setting up his final scares for any fools who dare ring his bell this evening.
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All around Gravity Falls, the entity known as the Summerween Trickster had split his body into individual candy pieces to make sure the townsfolk were keeping the spirit of Summerween. Much to his disappointment satisfaction, all were keeping the spirit holy. The Trickster found himself hoping that all the people of Gravity Falls would defy keep the spirit of Summerween, otherwise he would get have eat them.
As the hours passed, the Tricksters hopes lowered raised, seeing as all were behaving in accordance with the old traditions. Children were costumed, candy was given, pranks were puller, and the world was illuminated by the soft lights of the jack-o-melons. The Trickster hated loved the peace.
The peace had not dulled him, though. If the need arose, he would pull his body together from the pieces of loser candy he scattered throughout the town, and from the piles of so-called, "loser-candy", creating a form that allowed him to practically teleport, and, so long as his heart wasn't destroyed, regenerate any damage dealt by desperate prey sticks-in-the-mud. Suddenly, he sensed something, and a devilish grin split his mind's eye as he began to form.
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An amateur would assume a wheelbarrow is the most effective method of transporting large candy hauls; however, they would be wrong. If one's goal is to collect an arbitrary amount of candy, say 500 in order to not die, then it works fine. But, if ones goal is to maximize candy, then backpacks are the way to go. Backpacks are easier to fill, easier to move, and can be dropped off/ traded for an empty one much easier.
As Dipper and Mabel are professionals, and the fact that Techno can easily carry the Great Pyramid of Giza, this was the strategy used. Techno held backpacks, and sent the children and Soos with trick-or-treating bags which would be filled then dumped into the backpacks before repeating the process all over again.
By the time 8:30 rolled around, over 600 pieces of candy had been collected, and all the houses had been visited. The group stopped next to some bushes to count their spoils while Techno went through the bushes to see a man about a horse, but the rest were rudely interrupted by a van.
"I was right, you were going trick-or-treating! You're so lame, I bet the only person who could love you is your sister!" Robbie crowed from the safety of his van. "And those costumes, I mean, if you're going to embarrass yourselves, you get be somewhat creative. Because really, peanut butter and jelly? You may as well just put up a sign that says: I am lame, bully me. Ha! Ha! Ha!"
"Robbie Valentino! Why are you being such a jerk tonight? It's not cute." Wendy reprimanded Robbie. "You know what, I'm going to walk to the party." She said as she got out of the van.
"Wendy, wait! I didn't mean it, totally! Don't break up with me, please!" Robbie begged as Wendy walked towards Dipper and the gang.
"I'm not breaking up with you Robbie, I'm just-" Wendy started but was interrupted by deep, gravelly voice.
"I see someone is not keeping the spirit of Summerween, tsk tsk tsk." The source of the menacing voice was a tall form, wearing a patch-work suit coat and a scare-crow's hat. It had a yellow smiley face sticker placed on its face, and incredibly thin legs. It appeared, seemingly out of nowhere, in front of Robbie's van. "I suppose I should thank you for the meal, it has been so long since I last feasted."
"Wh-what are you talking about, man?! What do you mean, eat me?" Robbie asked nervously.
"Yeah, you can't just Robbie, no matter how much of a jerk he is!" Dipper said in support.
"You have disrespected me, and I am just so, so hungry. I'm sure you understand, I am the Summerween Trickster." He declared as he turned away from Dipper who was talking last and started walking towards the van. Fortunately, Techno finished using the john and pushed through the bushes, drawing the attention of the Trickster.
Techno stood there, shocked temporarily at the tall, clearly homeless, brown teletubby. "Heh?"
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Technofan12321: Yo it's Dream's cousin
Def_not_a_stoner: Think he's homeless like his cousin?
Bananamilkshake: @Def_not_a_stoner prolly
Average_techno_fan: alright, who vored dream? Was it you?
Carpediem: @Average_techno_fan chill
Average_techno_fan:@Carpediem nah
Bananamilkshake:@Average_techno_fan based
Pathoftheswole: @Average_techno_fan based+steroid-pilled
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Robbie attempted to use the Tricksters distraction to drive away, but no sooner had he floored the accelerator than an arm stopped the van and grabbed Robbie through the front window. "None of that, now. You won't be escaping alive, bwahahaha!"
"Somebody, help me! Please! I'm too young to die!" Robbie begged through tears.
"Put 'im down." Techno ordered, pulling out both a diamond axe and netherite sword.
"And what, pray tell, will you do? I am the guardian of Summerween! You are just a... a... oh shit." The Trickster dropped Robbie on his head and ran. The Trickster often spends his time spread out as loose loser candy, and so had a piece of candy in the manotaur's cave when Techno visited it last, meaning he recognized the Piglin before him.
Techno was not expecting the Trickster to start running this early on into the fight, so was slightly delayed when he began to give chase. The Trickster had switched from his four-limbed form into his more insectoid form in order to increase speed, but he was still no match for Techno.
"Hey, do you know how humans used to hunt, in prehistoric times?"
The Trickster did not respond but started running even faster.
"Humans have really good endurance."
The Trickster thought he might have been getting away when Techno threw an ender pearl ahead of the Trickster, forcing it into an alley.
"They hunt prey that's faster than them, but the prey sprints and wastes up all their endurance and the humans would just kinda... they'd just kinda keep up. Very slow and steady, they would just follow."
The Trickster was cut off again by an ender pearl.
"And over time, their prey would get more and more tired. Then they'd run out of energy. And then the humans would eat them."
Techno managed to remove two of the Tricksters arms, causing it to fly even faster.
"Isn't that interestin'?" Techno said as he landed directly on his prey with a throw, cutting off another arm before being thrown off. However, the Trickster miscalculated the amount of force, and ended up stuck in a pool of water. The Trickster couldn't stand up; it kept trying and failing, when it finally felt like it was being stared down. It slowly raised its head until it was looking up, directly into a pair of bloodthirsty eyes.
"Do you feel tired?"
"AAAAAAAUUU-"
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Once Techno returned to the group, they decided to call it a night. Robbie had driven off the moment the Trickster was driven off, and Wendy decided to just go back to the shack with the gang. Techno waved goodbye to them as he headed back towards his house, fiddling with a strange, heart shaped object on his way.
Stan told tales about scaring tens of children who were foolish enough to come to his door while the Summerween spirit was in him, and continued to be more and more dramatic until Mabel finally had enough and threw a piece of candy at him. In total, 618 pieces of candy were claimed by the trick-or-treators, and Stan was able to get his hands on another 200.
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After spending about three hours at the shack, eating candy and watching b-list horror films, Wendy walked back home and went to bed.
In the morning, Wendy's dad Manly Dan started talking to her.
"You should dump the valentine bas- boy! He isn't worthy of your love!"
"Dad, its 7:15, why are you bringing this up right now?"
"Because I care! If he can't protect my Wendy, he doesn't deserve you!"
"Wait, how do you even know what happened last night?"
"I!... Need to go cut down a tree!"
Manly Dan didn't trust anyone with his daughter, the last visual remnant of his wife, so he followed her around last night using trick-or-treating as cover, and was even able to more or less keep up with Techno, and had started connecting the dots between the warrior he had seen the previous night and the new woodsman. As Dan began felling a pine, he became lost in his memories of his wife, and vowed not to let the supernatural get its claws in Wendy.
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Finished 5/15/2023, Words: 3117, Written using a pirated copy of Microsoft Word 2007
AN2: Boom, another chapter! And I'm only, what, 2 weeks behind schedule? Oh well, this sort of thing happens when you move across the country, work three 12 hour shifts before being let go. (It was installing docks from a boat, and I got seasick one time), but, on the plus side, I'm living with my grandma and grandpa.
It's currently like 3:20 am here, so I'm going to post this and go to bed. I really need to add a code or two, spice the story up. Maybe next time, I'm really tired right now.