Chapter 43
Break
Tobie died in a road accident. He was chasing after the ring he was supposed to give me when a truck suddenly appeared.
So what did he mean when Lewis claimed... that Tobie died because of Giovanni? That Gio killed him? What the hell happened four years ago?
Who was lying? Who was telling the truth?
After overhearing that sickening conversation, I decided to leave at lunch time. Nag-half day lang ako dahil alam kong hindi rin ako makakapagtrabaho nang maayos.
I just couldn't accept it. I was in denial. I refused to believe or even think about the possibility that what Lewis had stated was true.
The Assistant Director seemed to notice my poor condition, so she immediately approved it.
I haven't messaged anyone from work about my leave. Mukhang nagkatotoo nga ang plano namin ni Edwards. I wouldn't make it to lunch to join Raquel.
The next day, I called in sick. I was too pale and queasy to go to work when I woke up. Kumatok si Kuya sa pinto bago umalis. Buti na lang nakumbinsi ko itong naka-day off ako ngayong araw.
Solo ko ang bahay pagkababa sa kusina dahil si Mama, abala rin sa panaderya. At that time, I still refused to think about what I heard yesterday, until I opened my phone.
Sunod-sunod ang pagdating ng mga notification doon. I accidentally hit one of the chat heads that popped up on my screen and realized it was our group chat. The latest message had my name tagged in it.
Raquel: We heard you're sick. Get back here as soon as possible. I'll make you pay for pranking me with this pervert!
Then she attached a photo of her and Edwards with her arm hanging around the latter's shoulders. Hagip din doon si David, tahimik na kumakain sa gilid.
That made me smile. Magre-reply pa lang dapat ako sa GC nang biglang sumulpot na naman ang bagong chat doon. This time, it came from Edwards.
Edwards: Are you with Gio?
Me: No. Bakit?
Edwards: Ms. Rio was looking for him but your boyfriend was nowhere to be found. Looks like he's AWOL. Any ideas?
Me: I'll check with him.
Kunot ang noo akong nakatitig sa phone habang iniisip ang posibleng nangyari.
He didn't go to work? And without official leave at that. It was out of character. Ito ang unang pagkakataon na narinig kong ginawa niya ito.
Kahit sa Mackenzie, walang ganitong pangyayari. Like it was a grave sin for him to do that. So what made him do this now?
Sinilip ko ang missed calls sa phone. Most of them were from Giovanni at around lunchtime... afternoon, and evening.
There was a total of 16 missed calls from him! Namilog ang mga mata ko.
Giovanni:
It's lunch. Where are you? I'm waiting in my office.
Giovanni:
Elia, where are you? You're not in your office either. I heard you filed a half-day leave. What happened?
Giovanni:
What is this all of a sudden?
Giovanni:
Pick up my calls, sweetheart.
Giovanni:
Why the hell did you turn off your phone?
Giovanni:
I'm home. Your brother told me you're sick. You should've told me. Please get better.
Giovanni:
Can I call you?
Giovanni:
Still unreachable, I see.
Giovanni:
I'll drop by tomorrow. Rest up and get well soon. I love you so much.
Napasapo ako ng bibig sa mga nabasa kong mensahe niya kahapon.
Those were the last messages. Wala nang bago ngayong araw. At ayon kay Edwards, wala rin ito sa opisina.
Nanuot ang munting kaba sa sistema ko. Wala ako sa sarili habang nakain ng almusal, iniisip ang mga posibleng rason kung bakit wala siya sa trabaho.
Should I call Sir Marco? Pabagsak kong nilapag ang baso sa mesa.
I should've asked for his number for times like this! Wala rin akong contact ng sekretarya niya. Hindi ko akalaing kakailanganin ko iyon ngayon.
Alam ko, pwede ko naman siyang tawagan nang diretso. But every time I recalled what I witnessed yesterday, sour feelings would drip into my system.
Nanlalabo ang paningin ko at nanginginig ang kalamnan. Gusto kong masuka sa tindi ng kaba at takot.
Over the past years, I admit, I slowly forgot how Tobie looked like when he was still alive. I needed to look at his photos to remember it. He became blurrier and blurrier in my memory.
May mga pagkakataon, na tuwing naririnig ko ang pangalan niya, o naaalala ang lalaking minahal ko noon... puntod niya ang unang sumusulpot sa utak ko at hindi siya.
There were also awful times when I would remember the guilt and pain I had when he passed away, rather than my love for him.
Ayokong aminin na unti-unti na akong nakakaahon mula sa masasayang alaala naming dalawa. At tanging masasalimuot na memorya na lang ang nananatili sa akin.
It had been almost 5 years. And what I witnessed yesterday felt like it opened a dry old cut in my chest. It was becoming fresh and unbearable again.
And instead of his grave, or my guilt, or my terrible recollections of him, now I would see Giovanni's face in my head.
But I refused to believe Lewis' words at face value. Not yet. Or maybe I couldn't accept it. I needed... to hear it from Giovanni instead. I needed to hear him deny it. He would explain it to me, right? He'd tell me the truth!
Animo'y nakaramdam sa hinagpis ko ngayon, tumunog ang phone para sa tawag ni Gio.
Lumunok ako nang malalim at gamit ang nanginginig na kamay, inabot ko iyon para sagutin.
Una kong narinig ang kaluskos sa kabilang linya. Tumindi ang tahip sa dibdib ko. I heard him mutter something to himself, as if he was away from his phone, when he finally came closer and picked it up to talk to me.
"I can't believe you finally answered..." His voice sounded wasted and indistinct.
My lips parted. "Are you drinking? This early in the morning, Gio?"
"I guess... I guess I did," I heard a faint rustle in his background like he rose to his feet or something. "It really is morning now. Ah, forget it. I didn't notice..."
I paced back and forth. Napasapo ako sa noo habang hindi mapakali kakaisip sa kanya. Hindi ito ang inaasahan kong mangyari!
Sigurado akong lasing siya. He was wasted! Sinong nasa matinong pag-iisip ang...
Dumiretso ako sa closet para kunin ang tuwalya ko.
"Nasaan ka ngayon?"
"Home..." His speech started to slur. "You... shouldn't come... You're sick... How are you feeling?"
I groaned. Mabilis akong pumasok sa banyo at mariing nakipagtitigan sa salamin.
"Stay where you are. Stop drinking. Take a shower and sleep."
Hindi ko na hinintay ang sagot niya. Naligo na ako at naghanda para puntahan siya sa condo niya.
It was driving me nuts. I didn't have time to deal with a drunken Gio, but look where the situation led me! Hindi ba dapat ako ang miserable at nagpapakalasing ngayon dahil sa nasaksihan ko kahapon? Anong nangyayari?!
"Is Gio in the penthouse?" tanong ko sa pamilyar na receptionist sa lobby.
"Good morning. Yes, Ma'am. He hadn't-"
"Thanks! I'll go ahead."
Wala na akong time magpaliwanag. Nagtungo na ako sa elevator dala ang mabibigat na hakbang.
Hindi ko alam kung makakausap ko ba nang matino si Gio sa kalagayan niya ngayon. If he needed to rest it off first, I decided to wait for him. Wala rin naman akong gagawin sa bahay. At kung mananatili lang ako roon, masisiraan lang ako ng bait kakaisip sa nangyari.
Tumigil ako sa harap ng penthouse. Hindi ko pa man tapos pindutin ang buong PIN, bumukas na agad ang pinto at bumungad sa akin ang may-ari. Basa pa ang buhok at mabango. Mukhang katatapos lang maligo.
Gio was pulling down his newly worn gray shirt when he strode toward me with heavy steps.
His somber eyes were languid and there was a domineering air around him, but he looked perfectly decent and fine.
My lips were set in a hard line. I got so worked up over nothing.
Nang tuluyan na siyang nakalapit, bigla akong nanigas sa kinatatayuan.
It suddenly... felt real. Saka ko lang natanto kung nasaan ako. At kung sino ang kaharap ko ngayon.
I prepared for a retreat, but Gio put his palm on the door frame as a support, when he crouched to reach for my left hand.
"You're not going anywhere after coming here," he dismissed me, his deep, rumbly voice touching something foreign inside of me.
Napatikhim ako nang hilahin niya ako papasok doon.
Ever since yesterday, the thought of confronting him made my stomach hollow, but actually doing it the next day made me want to faint, or tremble in fear... as if I was gonna be terrorized by a stranger.
And I hated myself for that. For judging him quickly, and being affected by something unverified.
Binawi ko ang kamay ko mula sa pagkakahawak niya kaya napahinto siya sa paglalakad at napalingon sa akin.
Sinuklian ko ang naninimbang niyang titig. He looked sober now. Mukhang nahimasmasan na kumpara kanina.
Gio shifted his weight from one foot to another before tasting his lower lip leisurely, intent eyes fixated on me.
"Do you feel unwell?" tanong niya.
Umiling ako. "Bakit hindi ka pumasok?"
Bumuntong-hininga siya, para bang dismayado sa sariling sagot.
"I lost track of time."
I squinted and took a step forward. Bumagsak ang tingin niya sa hakbang ko.
"How many bottles did you drink that you lost track of time?"
"A few," he then lifted his eyes to mine.
Nilagpasan ko siya at naglakad patungo sa may living room para silipin ang lababo. Sumunod siya sa akin. Hindi ako makapaniwala sa malalaking bote na nakapatong doon na hindi bababa sa tatlo.
"Why are you suddenly acting like this?" harap ko sa kanya.
This was so unlike him! May kinalaman ba ang nangyari kahapon? Sa pagitan nila ng pinsan niya?
Hirap siyang umiling at tuluyan nang lumapit sa akin.
"It's not something to worry about. It's nothing..." he said gently before caressing my arm. "I heard you're sick. Why don't we take a rest in-"
Umiling agad ako. "I'm here to talk to you. I'm not here to sleep."
There was a glint of curiosity and weariness in his eyes, but he licked his lips and nodded.
"Alright, let's talk," he spoke throatily and brushed his hair with his fingers. "But I'm afraid I'm not in my best condition, sweetheart... I know you're not, too. So I can't guarantee if we'll have a proper talk as we normally do."
"Don't worry. We can end this talk with just a question and answer." Napaiwas ako ng tingin. "A-All you have to do... is be honest."
I didn't know if I wanted this. I wanted to run and escape. Whatever the result might be, I didn't have the heart to start this conversation.
What if it was just a misunderstanding? I might hurt him.
What if he confessed that... he was truly guilty? I was too afraid to imagine the horror in my reaction.
Sa sandaling tumango nang tahimik si Gio at seryosong hinintay ang tanong ko, nanginig ang aking lalamunan.
Tinabunan ko ng kamay ang suot na singsing. Napansin iyon ni Gio. Bumagsak doon ang mga mata niya kaya agad nabahiran ng pag-aalala ang kanyang mukha.
I heaved a deep breath and did my best to keep up with his watchful gaze.
"I overheard you and your cousin... talking in your office yesterday." My throat quivered as I waited for a reaction from him.
His chest rose a fraction, as if his breathing hitched. That alone sent a shiver down my spine, especially when his hand loosened on me. Parang pinupunit nang unti-unti ang puso ko.
He already knew what I was talking about, but I still proceeded.
"He said that you caused... you caused Tobie's accident. That you were the reason why he got into that accident." Lalong dumiin ang hawak ko sa singsing kasabay ng paglunok ko. "Anong ibig niyang sabihin? Bakit... Bakit niya nasabi 'yon?"
Ramdam ko ang paghigpit ng kamay sa akin ni Gio nang nagtagal sa akin ang titig niya.
A shadow of guilt, pain, and regret crossed his face. That face had always been easy on the eyes, but today, it made me tremble with utter disbelief, fear, and disgust... that I couldn't fathom what I was witnessing.
Agresibo kong binawa sa kanya ang braso ko at napaatras.
"Y-Your cousin was just making fun of you, right? He knew I was there, so... so he just said that to cause a rift between us. Right, Gio?"
Tinabunan ko ng pilit na tawa ang panginginig ng lalamunan. Pinagmasdan ko siyang umiwas ng tingin habang klaro ang pag-igting ng kanyang panga.
Dumapo ang tingin ko sa pareho niyang kamay na ngayon ay nakakuyom na, tila ba may kinikimkim o nilalabanang sabihin... o gawin.
Hirap akong napailing at tinulak siya para tignan ako.
"Don't you dare try making excuses and just answer me, Gio. Just tell me. Tell me the truth! What happened four years ago, Gio? What did you do to Tobie?"
I gripped his shirt desperately as if my life depended on it. Kulang na lang ay alugin ko siya para tignan ako at sabihin sa akin ang totoo!
When he finally turned to face me, I stopped. Dinaluhan niya ang mga kamay kong mahigpit na nakakapit sa damit niya, magaan lang ang mga kamay niya sa akin, habang malinaw sa mukha ang pagod.
"Elia... please..." halos magmakaawa siya sa akin.
Magmakaawa saan? Na tigilan ko na 'to? Na patawarin ko siya? Ano?!
Tuluyan nang napigtal ang pasensiya ko at nanlabo ang mga mata dahil sa pagbabadya ng mga luha sa tindi ng iritasyon ko.
"Just answer my fucking question! Tell me what happened between you and To-"
"I pushed him!"
Natigilan ako at natulala sa kanya.
"What?" Para akong nabingi.
Humigpit lalo ang hawak niya sa mga kamay ko at muling umigting ang panga. Lumambot ang tingin niya sa akin.
"I... pushed him," he repeated with a diminishing voice and regretful eyes. "I-I was angry, so I pushed him..."
Mariin siyang napapikit, at nang idilat niya ang mga mata kalaunan, mas nabahiran iyon ng pagod at pamumula.
His forehead furrowed as if he was having a hard time recalling what happened before.
His lips parted, preparing for another word, but he couldn't, as if the mouth ran cold. I saw his Adam's apple bob around a swallow before his shoulders slumped and his head lowered.
"Fabian fell and dropped the ring in the gutter... oblivious to the truck approaching, and I was too consumed by my anger, Elia... to save him in time," hirap niyang paliwanag bago muling iangat sa akin ang tingin. "Everything happened because I was... fucking stupid... and angry..."
Nanghihina kong tinanggal ang mga kamay niyang nakahawak sa akin. Hindi ako makapaniwalang umiling sa kanya.
"T-That's not true. Is this a prank or somethi-"
"I will never lie to you about this." He looked pained as he held the intensity of my gaze. "I-I'm sorry... I'm sorry I hid this from you, Elia, but please don't-"
"You're sorry? Sorry for what? For fooling me?" Gusto ko na lang matawa. "I trusted you! I broke my rules for you! I thought you had changed! But you didn't-"
"I did!" Misery and desperation overtook his face when he made that protest. "Elia, believe me... I did..."
"No! You've been lying to me this whole time with your rebuilding our lives together bullshits! And I let you in, Gio. I fucking let you in my life only to destroy it again!"
The guilt was written all over his face, his eyes filled with a mixture of pain and sorrow when they settled on me for a moment. Then he nodded slowly, almost against his will.
"I'm sorry..."
Hearing his apology one more time only made it worse. Tuluyan akong nanghina. Lalong nangilid ang mga luha ko nang mas naging malinaw sa akin ang lahat.
As I stared at Gio, the feeling of contempt settled in my stomach.
I couldn't believe what was happening. I felt played and fooled. I felt fucking betrayed by the man... this mad, crazy monster that I thought I could tame. Pero sa huli, niloloko ko lang pala ang sarili ko.
Sa huli, nagpadala lang ako sa sarili kong ilusyon. I only refused to wake up from this daydream, even if I knew it was too good to be true.
Naisip ko... when will I ever make the right decision in this lifetime? From my father, Tobie, to Yves... and now, Gio...
I only knew how to choose the bad options. And I did them very well. A faint smile hung on the corner of my lips before I nodded in finality, too.
"You're right. None of it was my fault..." I laid my empty eyes on him for the last time, and gave him my weakest smile. "Because all this time, you knew it was yours."
His brows furrowed in despair as my words hit him. Pero kahit na ganoon, sinubukan niya pa rin akong lapitan.
Gio tried reaching for me but I flinched at the initial contact of his finger to my skin.
Horror immediately crept into my face. He saw it. He stopped and his hand slowly fell on his side.
"Elia..." he almost begged with his pale and miserable face.
I should be surprised right now. It was the first time I saw him this miserable and helpless.
But I had no time for that. I finally turned my back and walked away from him.
"I'm too sane for your crazy antics." Those were my last words before I opened the door and left.
That same day, I went to the cemetery to visit Tobie. I was talking to him aimlessly, until I found myself crying and laying bare in front of his grave.
"W-We're done. Gio and I..." I stuttered while sniffing and gasping for air.
Tumingala ako at pagak na tumawa.
"How could I... accept someone like him anyway? Pagkatapos ng lahat ng nalaman ko, h-hindi ko kakayanin, Tobie. He will always... remind me of you. If I keep staying with him, h-he'll remind me of your unfortunate past. It will haunt me. I-I can never move on..."
Funny how our paths had crossed because of Tobie, and got separated for the same reason, too.
Parang pinaglaruan lang kami ng mundo. Pinaglaruan lang nila ako.
As days went by before my eyes, it might be immature as it might sound, but I discarded everything I earned through him. Direkta man o hindi.
The gifts I received from him—I put them in a box and hid them somewhere that was hard for me to see. The internship at Smitten, I quit.
And Mackenzie...
"Are you sure about this, hija?" puno ng pag-aalala ang tono at hitsura ni Tita Jean.
Isang linggo ang nakalipas, natapos ko ang mga dapat asikasuhin sa Smitten at Mackenzie nang hindi nagkakasalubong ang landas naming dalawa.
After everything, I informed Tita Jean and Tito Vince that I'd visit them today. Ako na mismo ang pumunta sa kanila sa araw na hindi sila masyadong abala. Bothering them was the last thing I wanted to happen.
Tumango ako. "Opo, Tita. Pasensiya na kayo kung... naging biglaan ang desisyon ko. I'm already preparing for my college entrance exam."
Mas lalong nabahiran ng gulat ang reaksiyon ng ginang. Natanto niya na siguro... kung gaano ako kaseryoso sa desisyong ito.
Tito Vince sighed beside her. "I'm not against your decision, Ophelia. You know that. Nanghihinayang lang ako sa scholarship na natanggap mo sa Mackenzie. You earned it in the first place."
Kumirot ang puso ko, pero pinilit ko pa ring ngumiti.
That was one of the biggest factor that made me reevaluate my decision lately. Letting go of the full scholarship I earned through my title as a Valedictorian was a huge waste of opportunity.
I wanted to go to college at a different university but it cost me my scholarship from Mackenzie.
But I thought, if I wanted to take my own path, I must do it properly. I must put my mind and heart into it. Something I should've done a long time ago.
"As much as I sincerely appreciate your concern and consideration, Tito Vince, Tita Jean... I want to do this..."
Inabot ni Tita ang kamay ko at tumango.
"We understand, anak. And if I am to be honest, I'm proud of you right now for standing your ground without the influence of other people. This is the first time I see you, hija, this firm and determined for yourself."
Nanatili ang ngiti sa mga labi ko, ngunit nakaukit ata ang kuryosidad sa reaksiyon ko kaya napangiti si Tita Jean sa akin.
"For the longest time, I felt you're not being true to yourself, hija. You look like someone who'd choose what you think is right, rather than what you think you personally want. I'm not saying that it's wrong, anak, but I always think that it may come back to bite you someday, and you'll regret it. So I'm happy that you finally choose what you truly wanted. You're still young, hija, you have your whole life ahead of you, so spend your youth wisely."
Tumango bilang pagsang-ayon si Tito Vince bago sumimsim sa kanyang tasa.
Pinagmasdan ko ang mag-asawang Fabian. Walang mintis ang suporta at pang-unawa ng mga taong ito. They had a big contribution to where I was currently in life. They supported and loved me like their own... even better than my own mother...
Dinaan ko sa munting tawa ang emosyonal na katotohanan bago pa man magbadya ang mga luha.
Tumayo ako mula sa aking pwesto at umikot sa lamesa para lapitan ang mag-asawa. I hugged them both to their surprise.
Eventually, Tita Jean caressed my arm and chuckled heartily. Ginulo naman ni Tito ang buhok ko bago nakisabay sa tawa ng asawa.
I was never the affectionate and expressive type, so I knew they were as shocked as I was, but my emotions and gratitude toward them were overflowing and I couldn't help but show it.
"I want to officially rebuild my life, Tita and Tito. Your family has taught and helped me a lot in life. So I will use this drive as well, to start afresh and discover the life ahead of me."
"You know we're always here for you."
Nasa kalagitnaan pa kami ng kwentuhan at merienda, nang lumapit ang isang kasambahay nila Tita sa amin. Inanunsiyo nito ang pagdating ni Ulrik kaya nabalutan ng saya ang ginang.
"Perfect timing! We should prepare a feast for dinner!"
"Isn't a feast too much?" ngisi ni Tito Vince sa asawa.
Tumayo si Tita. "Don't be such a spoilsport. For sure, he brought our dear Gianna again, so a feast is fine."
Sumunod na rin ako sa pagtayo nila para salubungin si Ulrik, pero kinabahan ata ako nang narinig ang pangalan ng kapatid... at kambal ni Giovanni.
Dimiretso kami sa tanggapan ng mansiyon. Nakasunod lang ako sa mag-asawa nang narinig ko na ang paglapit ng mga hakbang na mula sa mga bagong dating na panauhin.
Tita Jean was right. The moment Ulrik entered the mansion, I caught sight of Gianna Collins beside him. Awtomatiko ang ngiti ng dalaga sa mag-asawa nang natagpuan niya ang mga ito.
Nanigas ako sa kinatatayuan. Ngayon ko lang ito nakita sa personal nang harap-harapan na. Hindi pa nakatulong ang katotohanan... na wala na kami ng kapatid niya.
It felt awkward deep inside as I listened to their chatters. Kahit wala naman akong ideya kung alam ba nito ang naging ugnayan ko sa kakambal niya.
"I'm glad you paid us a visit, Gia. I missed you so much!"
Mahinhing tumawa ang dalaga at yumakap kay Tita Jean.
"As soon as I found out that you're on vacation leave from your eldest son, we drove straight here before your actual vacation, Tita."
I heard Ulrik snort before approaching his parents. "You always address me like some kind of irrelevant supporting character that can't be named, Smith's eldest daughter."
"Stop it, you children. Nakakahiya kay Ophelia. She's here with us, too," Tita then gestured for me to come closer.
Napatikhim ako. Tipid ang bawat kilos ko nang lumapit sa gawi nila.
Sa sandaling nakalapit na nang tuluyan, inangat ko ang tingin kay Ulrik at sa katabi nito, bago bahagyang yumuko sa harap nila.
"Good afternoon. It's nice seeing you here..."
"Riz, there you are! Hindi agad kita napansin," si Ulrik.
Pagkaahon mula sa pagkakayuko, nahuli ko ang mapanuring tingin nito sa katabi.
Dahil doon, lumipat kay Gianna ang mga mata ko. At base sa hitsura nito, masasabi kong hindi niya nagustuhan ang tanawing nasa harapan.
"What are you doing here?" May bahid ng pagkalito at gulat ang tinig niya, animo'y nakakita ng multo.
"Hey..." Ulrik chimed in, blocking Gianna's vision as if to prevent a clash from happening.
Umatras ako, nagbabaka-sakaling makakatulong iyon para mapakalma ang dalaga. Pero tumabi ito para harapin sina Tita at Tito na kapuwa lito rin sa nangyayari.
"Please excuse my nasty behavior, but this girl... I just can't stand the sight of her today. I don't know what I can do to her if she stays here any longer."
I blinked nervously. I was wrong. Mukhang may alam siya sa nangyari sa amin ni Giovanni, pero hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit ganito kalaki ang galit niya sa akin.
"W-What do you mean, hija? Ano bang nangyayari?"
Dahil sa tanong ni Tita Jean, unti-unting namula ang mistisang ilong at pisngi ng dalaga, kasabay noon ang pangingilid ng luha nito.
"Just when we thought he was getting better, Clark is having severe episodes again, Tita."
Maliban kay Ulrik, lahat kami ay gulat na natulala kay Gianna dahil sa sinabi nito. Isang marahas na singhap bago lumipat ang mariin nitong mga mata sa akin.
"If you want to break up with him, break the relationship. Not my brother."
May 16, 2023
#GCSeries1
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