TW: Self Harm
The glistening night holds a certain kind of beauty as the stars shine brightly despite the grey clouds that threaten to cry into their destruction.
I stare outside as I capture the essence of nature and how peaceful it is before the storm will come. I know that this is life for me but wouldn't it be nice to live in peace for once? Couldn't I change my ending for the first time in my life?
Turning on my heel, I amble to my mirror engrained into my closet and gaze at my body. I take in my complexities and try to understand me.
My hazelnut brown curls fall gracefully down my body until they come to halt just above my bottom. My coffee coloured eyes continue to scan each part of my body; my heart shaped lips, tallish frame and thighs that I tried so hard to compress for as long as I can remember.
The thin healing scars that remain attached to my thighs. Those thin lines that capture my life in one whole and revealed how I am to the world.
I suck in a deep breath as I try to prepare myself for this event. The worst part is that I would be wearing a crimson red dress that hugged my waist perfectly and holds the longest slit that reached my bikini line, as picked by my stylist.
I had to remain a distraction while Jungkook did the honours and took Duncan down. We have to after the problems I know he would've created. All because my father couldn't properly background check who he was.
I stare at each scar and what meaning they held – from this life and all the problems I endured to that one breakup that shredded me to the core.
I slip into the silk material and watch as the dress slips perfectly down my body. I watch as it hugs my waist and breasts and how the slit extends towards my bikini line. My stylist knew how perfect this was for the perfect distraction.
I take in a shaky breath with a fake smile and mentally prepare myself for the event that will come. I have to get used to this because this is my life. Every leader, or yet to become leader had to attend events like this.
Every leader had scars too.
I'm no different. It shows how far I have come and I deserve a spot just like every single leader does. I may have different problems and what I can endure but still, I'm no different than the rest. I deserved to be in this spot.
But what if I didn't?
I hear a bang on my door. "Aria, Jungkook is here!" My father announces behind the closed door. My attention is caught and I take in a deep breath to calm the nerves that pile in my stomach.
I plaster on a smile with my painted crimson lips as I begin to amble along with my midnight black heels clicking behind me. I sway my hips and prepare myself for this event to come.
My hands grip my phone tightly as I swing my curls back over my shoulder and open the door to reveal my father. He smiles with a quick nod and holds out his hand for me to grab.
"Perfection, as always. This will do the job," he smiles with a nod. I grip his arm as I walk beside my father towards Jungkook, who will accompany me.
My heels click against the marble floor as we amble down the corridor until we reach the entrance of the staircase that twirls down to the door.
"Now go. Jungkook knows the plan and knows to take care of you. Don't leave his sight, am I understood?" My father explains as his coffee coloured eyes gaze into mine, and he runs a hand through his slicked back hair.
I nod. "Understood," I mumble.
I turn away from my father and begin to strut down the staircase. The click of my heels pound against the floor as my hips sway with every step I take.
My stomach is in nerves, but I don't care. I'm supposed to be a leader so these kind of things shouldn't get to me. No matter how many times I try to leave, my place belongs in this house.
My attention is caught by one fine looking man at the end of the staircase as he stares up at me. Hands intertwined in front of him, and black suit sharp as a knife that brings out how actually buff he is, I watch as his mouth falls agape and eyes widen.
A smile cracks onto my lips – a reaction that never gets old. "Cat got your tongue, Jeon?" I ask as I stand in front of him and place a hand on my hip.
"You're – " he cuts himself off as he gulps and turns away. His eyes meet an abstract painting my father specifically picked out for whatever reason. "You look fine," he mumbles as he gulps and tucks a strand of hair behind his ear.
My cat looking eyes, sharpened with eye-liner and eyeshadow, with the help of my stylist, stares right through him.
He coughs. "Stop looking at me like that," he snaps. He begins to play with his silver lip ring with his tongue.
I take a step forward until I'm staring up at his lip ring that he continues to twirl with his tongue. With that, I try to meet his eyes but he doesn't budge.
"Are you okay, Jungkook?" I ask.
"Am I okay? No, are you okay?" He snaps as he takes a step back and fans his face briefly. "Girl, ever heard of personal space? Can't a man ever get some oxygen around here? Gosh, everytime I come here, it's like it's cut off. Is the air-conditioner working?"
A smile tugs onto my lips. "Last time I checked, it was working fine. Did something else catch your attention, Jeon?" I ask once again as I raise an eyebrow in his direction.
"My attention? My attention is catched – caught. Gosh, English is so damn hard," he grumbles as he runs a hand through his black waves.
"Jungkook," I begin.
He finally looks into my eyes and his eyebrows raise. "Yes?" He mumbles.
I take a step forward until my perfectly manicured fingers grab his tie and adjust it to my standard of perfection. I watch him gulp under my touch. "You look handsome, Jeon," I compliment.
His eyes widen. "Gosh, that was random," he says as his lips crack into a small smile. "But do I actually look handsome? I do, don't I?" His lips begin to tilt into a much larger smile as he looks down to his new and fresh suit.
"This is the only time you're getting that compliment, Jeon. But yes, you look very handsome. I bet all the girls will be fawning over you tonight –" I cut myself off as I grab his tie and pull him closer. "But tonight you're mine, yes?" I ask.
His eyes widen. I smile as I watch him squirm under my touch. "I'm yours?" He whispers under his breath.
I nod. "Just for tonight –"
He shakes his head slightly and composes himself. His hand grabs my jaw gently and traces his finger against my crimson painted lips. "And while we're on this topic –" he begins. "Any man that flirts with you, I would assume has a death wish. No matter how much I despise you, I won't be ending a life of one man, but two,"
"You're quite the romantic man, Jeon," a smile cracks onto my lips as I pat his chest gently. "If anything, I would've assumed you just fell in love with me,"
He laughs – a laugh that sounds like a perfect melody. "Sure, darling. Whatever helps you sleep at night," he says as he ruffles my hair gently.
I watch as takes a step back and how his eyes trail down my body. "And since it's only fair with that compliment you gave me, I'll give you one," he starts. I gulp as I feel vulnerable and naked underneath his intense gaze. "Twirl for me," he instructs as he uses to indicate that motion.
I obey as I slowly turn around to allow him to take in the dress. "What do you think?" I ask as I mentally prepare myself for any compliment he will give.
His eyes fall onto my scars. Without a moment more, I grab the fabric and hide them from his gaze. Suddenly, the floor is way more interesting.
Feeling a finger underneath my chin, I obey and gaze up into his eyes. I also feel his other hand glide down my side until it's gripping the fabric that covers the scars. I try to look down but his finger holds me in place, eyes staring into one another.
His hand rips the fabric open until my scars are showing once again. I feel the air slap my thigh once again and I gulp harshly as I stare up into his eyes.
"I want to see your scars," he whispers as his fingers trails over one scar at a time. I feel goosebumps erupt over my skin from the contact of his skin. "I find your scars beautiful – every single one of them and if any person decides to tell you otherwise, I won't hesitate to hurt them. Am I understood?" He demands.
I gulp under his touch and try to control my breathing. I watch as he breaks our eye contact and falls to his knees until he's staring at each scar.
"Jungkook," I whisper as I feel the embarrassment settle within me.
"May I?" He asks as he gazes up. I gulp but nod anyways. For whatever reason, I feel okay with him seeing them.
"It's not what you think, Jungkook,"
His fingers glide over each scar and I feel my stomach erupt into thousands of little butterflies. I want to drown them with wine later on. "Is it because of Ryder? Is it because of this life?"
"It was during Ryder," I whisper. However, what takes me off guard is when I watch as he jumps to his feet. I hold his jacket sleeves. "I was happy. It was fine. My mind was just like that–"
"You were happy?" He booms. "If anything, that bastard put you through so much shit to cause these," he snaps as he gestures down to those scars.
"It wasn't just him. It was this life. I went through so much in this world. It wasn't just him. Please don't kill him," I plead my case as I clutch his jacket.
"If anything, I should kill him. No matter how much I despise you and everything about you, I wouldn't put you in a state to cause these," he snaps.
"Jungkook, I said to leave it," I snap. "You're just my employee and that's it. You're not supposed to care about me and kill my ex. Our job at this very moment is to act like we're together, get inside that venue and slaughter Duncan," I bite as I fold my arms.
He huffs. "Fine, whatever," he snaps. "But what I said, I meant it. Anyone ever decides to tell you that these aren't beautiful, I will slaughter them," he bites as he folds his own arms.
A smile cracks onto my lips. "That's quite sexy of you," my mood changes. "Most people find these kind of things not attractive, yet you do?" I ask.
"It's because it's you," he mumbles. My eyebrows raise. "It's because I've seen the shit you've been through to gain these scars – how you endured life. These scars are like your warrior marks – I sorta admire you," he explains.
"Now, that's a compliment, Jeon."