YSA'S POV
"It's sure nice to be out here for a while,right?" Jinro asked me.
I sighed mentally, yeah. It's really nice to be out of town for a while. I actually needed this escape.
"Ysa, are you okay?" Allison asked me too and I nodded.
Speaking of, She took me out yesterday saying that she wants me to come to her new project. It's an out of town work so she wants me to come keep her company while she's at it. I didn't have anything else to do so I said yes. Besides, I think I needed a break from all that's happening to me. It's my second day here today, and it's really peaceful. I like it here.
"So? Any plans?" Jinro asked again.
I know what he means. It's about Hawkmoth, it's been weeks since we went to Mr Agreste's house and I found out the truth about his identity. I haven't told anyone yet, I couldn't. Atleast not now, I'm thinking about Adrien's feelings. I know he'll get hurt if I told him the truth. And I don't want that. He's my safe place,My sanctuary.
"Not yet,Jinro. Adrien will be devastated if he'll find out the truth." I answered.
"But Ysa, things will just get messy. He'll know it eventually and he will be mad at you for not being honest with him."
"I don't know what to do. I love him so much that I'm willing to have this secret until my last breath in order to keep him,Jinro."
"You know it doesn't go that way,right? What happened years ago was an accident. She saved you. You're not the one who took her away from her family." He explained.
"But I'm the reason why she couldn't get back to her family anymore,Jinro. Adrien is yearning to be with his mother and father and I took that chance away. Unless..."
"Unless what?" Jinro curiously ask.
"Unless I can find a way to bring Emily back."
"But how?! The only way to bring her back is the Miraculous of Ladybug and Catnoir. And you know how dangerous it is." He said and I looked down in disappointment.
He's right. There's no way I can use those Miraculous, I don't even know who Catnoir is. But I really want to bring Emily back so they all can be together again.
"Don't worry, we'll find a way. Maybe a safe way." My kwami comforted me while patting my head.
Jinro and I strolled in the small town until Allison finishes her work so that we can go back to our home. Adrien is calling me nonstop to know when will I get back and he even offered to fetch us up but I said it's okay. Allison hired a driver already. He's a caring and gentle guy and I know I love him so much.
"Ready to go home?" Allison asked us when we entered the car.
"Yep, Adrien is calling me since yesterday asking when we'll come back." I chuckled.
"You know, I still can't believe you two ended up together. How did Adrien manage your attitude? I mean, he's a gentle guy. And you're...well, wild?" She said making me pout at her.
"What are you proposing,Allison? I'm kind." I said causing her to laugh.
"I know that. It just doesn't summed up. You're a wild flower and Adrien is a gentle explorer. It's a good thing Adrien manages to fall for you." She said.
She has a point. No matter how you look at it, Adrien is a gentle soul and I'm the ripper. Are we really meant to be together?
"But anyhow, Love doesn't have boundaries. It doesn't said that one shouldn't be in love with differences, you're both lucky to have each other." Allison continued making me smile.
"What's with you and love advices today,Alli? Don't tell me you're in love too?" I said and she stilled. Bingo!
"What? Did I hit a nerve?" I laughed and she glared at me.
"Oh, shut up."
"Seriously,Alli. Who's the unlucky guy?" I teased her.
"N-nothing. Besides, he doesn't even know." She sighed.
"So there is a guy,HAHAHA Spill." I laughed at her.
"He's my co-worker. He's been with me since day one and I--"
"You fell inlove with him? Cool." I interrupted.
"B-but he doesn't know yet."
"Act your age woman, you're already 30. Now's not the right time to play hide and seek. If you're afraid of rejection then atleast you've said what you want to." I said to her.
"It's not about the rejection, I'm scared that our friendship will go to waste once I confess. He'll probably ignore me." She replied looking down.
I sighed. It's hopeless, Allison is old enough to know what she's doing so I'll leave it to her. I just nodded and close my eyes to take a nap. When I woke up, were already infront of the Eiffel tower. I smiled at the the that I'm very much close to home now.
"I'll take you home." Allison offered and I nodded.
"Thanks,Alli."I said but she shook her head.
"Nope, I'm the one to thank you. For keeping me company."
"What? That's absurd, no need to thank me Alli. You've been keeping me company for the last 9 years and that's all I can give you." I said while laughing.
"Speaking of keeping you company for 9 years, what's bothering you?" She said taken me a back.
"W-what do you mean?Haha" I gave her an awkward laugh.
"Don't lie to me young lady, I know you've been off since yesterday." She said and I heaved a deep breath before explaining.
"So,you didn't tell him yet? He deserves to know okay?" She sighed.
"I'm going to hurt him again,Alli. I don't want that to happen,I love him." I said.
"Love Hurt's,Ysa. If it doesn't hurt,it isn't love. If Adrien doesn't love you, he wouldn't care about you.He cares about you, he loves you." She explained and I cried in pain.
"Tell him, before it's too late." She said while hugging me.
"Thank you,Alli." I said and hugged her back.
True to Allison's words, she really took us home. I am now on my bed and I have no idea on what I will do.
"How can I tell him,Jinro?" I asked my kwami while looking at phone, I'm deciding if I should call him on the phone, or just talk to him in person.
"I suggest you talk to him in person,Ysa." He answered.
"Maybe you're right." I said and was ready to call him when my phone rang. I raised a brow while looking at Adrien's name on my screen. I'm supposed to be calling you.
"Hello?" I answered.
"Hey, mind if I talk to you? I'm really not in a good mood and I need you." He said and I shot up from bed,worried about what happened.
"Where are you? I'm coming at you." I asked.
"Can you come at my house today,love? I'm not really okay." He sadly said.
Upon knowing where he is, I immediately ended the call and sprinted towards the door. I even bumped on Marinette while I was running downstairs.
"Oops! Sorry, sis. I'm in a hurry." I said.
"Wait! Where are you going?you just got back." Marinette shouted.
"Adrien needs me!" Is all I replied before opening the door.
I rode a cab and went to Adrien's house. When the taxi stopped infront of his house I didn't waste a second going out without even getting my change. He can have it. Adrien is more important than that.
"His in his room, he refuses to eat his lunch today." Nathalie replied when I ask her where Adrien is.
"Thank you, Nathalie. Uhm, can I have his lunch? I'm giving it to him." I asked and she nodded.
When I reached his bedroom door, I knocked three times but he didn't answer. When I knock again he shouted.
"I don't wanna eat,Nathalie."
"H-hey! It's me." I said quietly.
A few second of silence when the door opened and suddenly a strong hand grabbed me and pulled me inside. When he locked the door, he enveloped me with a tight hug, burying his head into my neck while sniffing. He's crying.
"Adrien? What's wrong love?" I asked him. His embrace tighten and I can feel myself, almost out of breath but I didn't mind, if hugging me crushingly will make him feel comfort then I'm willing to give him the comfort he needed.
"I'm not fine,Ysa. *Sob* Father is being unfair again *sob*." He said while still crying. It's the first time I heard him sobbed like this. He must have been really in pain. He's crying his heart out.
"You can tell me later, but I want you to eat your lunch first. Nathalie said you didn't eat it earlier." I said and he shook his head.
"I'm not hungry."
"Please? I'm worried." I said and he broke the hug to look at me.
"Oh, Adrien." I thought to myself. His face is covered in tears. He's really that hurt?
"Please,love? For me?" I pressed my forehead in his forehead. Then finally, he simply nodded making me smile.
I let him eat his lunch in silence while watching him. Im ready to head downstairs to grab a glass of water when a hand stops me from walking. I turn to look at him and saw his emerald green eyes forming tears again.
"H-hey, what's wrong?" I walked infront of him and hug him.
"Father wanted me to meet with the girl my mother saved years ago." He started that made me stilled.
"W-what do you think?" I nervously asked. I felt his face moved. Shaking his head.
"W-why? Aren't you going to see if she's okay?" I said and I immediately felt his hug tighten. His hand grips tightly at my waist.
"See if she's okay? Why would I do that? She killed my mother,Ysa. She took her away from me." She coldly replied causing my breath to hitch. I knew it, he's going to be mad at me.
"She's the reason my father and I had never get along together.I-If only I didn't befriend her and waste my time playing with her my mother wouldn't have stayed and save that girl." His voice is trembling. I just listen to his story.
"Did you know, she was supposed to be my second friend?" He asked but I just shook my head.
"I know,Adrien. And I'm sorry." I thought to myself.
"My father said he wanted to introduce the girl to me. We fought over it. I know it's been years already but I can't move on. I hate her. I wish to never see her again!" He said and I felt my heart clenched in pain.
"I'm sorry." I looked down at him.
"Why are you saying sorry,Love? It's not your fault." He said and look up at me,meeting my gaze.
"It is, it's all my fault. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you. I can't " I thought.
"I'm sorry you have to feel this way,love." I said but he shook his head.
"It's okay. As long as you're with me, I'm fine." He said and give me a small smile.
"I'm going downstairs for a while." I blurted out making him stilled.
"A-are you leaving me?" He asked nervously and I shook his head.
"No, of course not! Why would you think that I'll leave you? I'm just going down to get you a glass of water." I said and he nodded but still not letting me go.
"You're not leaving me even if I'll tell you to?" He acts like a kid while pressing his face in my stomach. I sighed and then I patted his head.
"No, I'm not leaving you, even if you push me away." I said then I gave a kiss on top of his head.
"Why would I push you away? You're my comfort zone,Ysa. I will never,ever let you go." He said while looking directly at my eyes.
"I wish you can hold on to that,Adrien. After all, you promised to stay with me forever.But I guess things won't work out the way we planned, unexpected things will happen even if you don't want to."
I didn't answer him back. I just gave him a sweet smile before turning around. I walked down the stairs to get his water when I saw Mr Agreste looking at me from the table. I smiled to greet him and he gestured me to walk near him, and I did. Even though my insides are literally shaking I manage to face him calmly.
"Thank you for staying at my son's side,Ms Ysa." He said.
"Adrien means so much to me Mr Agreste, of course I'll be happy to stand beside him." I answered with a small smile.
"I will be frank at you,Ms Ysa. I know who you are, you're the child who Emily saved, am I right?" He sighed before sipping his coffee. I was taken a back but I recovered fast and I gave him a nod.
"Who would have thought that you'll grow into a fine young lady, and you ended up with Adrien,too." He continued.
"I-im sorry, but believe me Mr Agreste. I didn't plan on falling in love with Adrien. Heck, if I have known I wouldn't dare to come near him but-- but I-I, I love him...So much it hurts." I cried while looking down.
"Meeting my son is never a coincidence,Ysa. I planned it all when I took you to be my model." He confessed making me look at him in disbelief.
"S-so he-- he knows? All this time he knows who I am?"
"But I didn't do that for revenge, Emily wouldn't want me to do it. And that goes for Adrien too. I wanted you to get close to my son again, just like you two did years ago."
"Y-you let him come near me and you tell me it's not for revenge? A-adrien is... He's suffering because of what I did! H-he hates me Mr Agreste." I cried.
"My son needed to accept the truth,Ysa. It was an accident. I know my son is blaming himself, not you." He explained but I shook my head.
"N-no! He's mad at me. He hates me! *Sob* I-I... I killed his mother!"
"W-what?"
We heard a voice behind me. I turned to look at that person and my world stopped after realizing who it was.
"A-adrien?" I whispered.
"I'm worried because you're taking too long to come back. Turns out you have a very important conversation with my father." He stared at me coldly.
"N-no..I-i.." I couldn't find a word to say.
"Is is true?" He ask seriously but I didn't answer him.
"Tell me! Is what I heard true?!" He shouted. He clenched his hand in anger.
"Y-yes.. I--Im the girl that Emily saved years ago.*sob* I'm your second f-friend. *Sob* I'm sorry! I-im s-so sorry!" I sobbed.
"W-why?! Why didn't you tell me?! We've been together,Ysa! We've talked most of the time! How can you not tell me about this!? All this time, I've been with my mother's murderer and I didn't even noticed it?" He started to cry again. I felt a shot of pain after hearing him addresses me as his mother's murderer. I took a step forward but he just walked back.
"I-im sorry. *Sob* I couldn't tell you because-- because I'm scared! *Sob* I-im scared that you will hate me. I don't want it to happen but believe me-- Im just looking for the right time to tell you!*sob*" I cried.
"I TRUSTED YOU!! I EVEN GAVE MY LOVE FOR YOU! AND JUST LIKE THAT YOU DECIDED TO HURT ME AGAIN?! IS IT FUN? IS IT AMUSING FOR YOU TO SEE ME HURT FOR THE SECOND TIME?! YOU TOOK MY MOTHER FROM ME!" He shouted but I couldn't say anything. I just let him curse at me.
"OF ALL THE GIRLS OUT THERE, WHY DO I HAVE TO FALL INLOVE WITH A MURDERER LIKE YOU!?" I cried harder while still listening to him.
"I WISH I DIDN'T KNOW YOU! I WISH I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT YOU! AND I WISH I DIDN'T LOVE YOU!!" His words linger around my head.
"IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN YOU!! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO DIE NOT HER! I WISH THAT YOU'RE THE ONE IN HER POSITION RIGHT NOW!!"
"I-im*sob* s-so sorry. *Sob* I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Was all I can say.
"Leave." He coldly said. I looked at him and I saw him staring at me with his dead eyes.
"N-no. Y-you promised you would never let me go.*sob* A-adrien please!* I cried while begging him not to let me go.
"That was my love, I promised to Ysa that I will never let her go. Ysa, not you. You're a murderer, no one will love a murderer like you." He plainly said as if I was nothing to him.
"I'm Ysa,Love. I-im still me." I tried to convince him but he shook his head.
"Please don't call me that. Don't call me that again, Go. Leave. Before I do something you never wished to see." I knew it, he's pushing me away.
"I promised I'll stay right? I'll stay even if you push me away. I'm here,love. I know you still love me. H-hurt me, Curse me, Shout at me, but please don't push me away." I plead. He looked at me and give me a sarcastic laugh.
"Love you? HAHAHA! You're kidding right? How can I love someone like you? You want to know something? I don't love you anymore! I--"
"S-stop!" I shouted but he just laughed at me.
"No! I wanted you to hear this." He said while walking towards me. He then grab my collar and pulled me close to him and whispered..
"I regret the day I met you, I even regretted loving you." After he said that, he pushed me causing me to hit the ground before turning his back and walked away from me.
I cried again. My waste hurts, but my heart's even in pain. I thought I couldn't feel a much painful feeling than this, turns out his last words even cuts deeper than the physical pain I felt.
"Give him time, he'll come to his senses." Mr Agreste said behind me. He's still here,I see. He's watching me getting trashed by his son.
"I know it was you're idea. It was your plan after all. You didn't want me for your son, and we both know the reason why, now what are you going to do? You got what you wanted. Ah, right. You don't. Emily is still lying in that coffin, Of course you're still not finish with your plans. So what are you going to do Mr Agreste? Or should I say, Hawkmoth." I said causing him to be astonished. He stared at me with wide eyes.
"Oh, you think I didn't know? Sadly, I do. Are you going to akumatize me and your son? You're free to do so, after all. We're both giving you a very big negative energy. I know what you're going to do,though. I just wish you would succeed in doing it." I said coldly before turning to the door,leaving him shock and speechless.
I left with a broken and empty heart. I know my relationship with Adrien is now over. I know it would happen, I just couldn't imagine things to turn out this way. I pulled my phone out and dialed Allison's number. Few rings and she picked up.
"Hey! What is it?" She asked and I cleared my throat before answering.
"Can I stay at your house for now? I'm feeling listless and empty."
"Why? What's wrong?" She asked again.
"I'll explain later. Can I?"
"Of course,silly! Where are you? I'll pick you up."
I told her I'll wait outside the bakery. I'll just get my things first.
"Are you sure you'll stay with Allison for now?" Mom asked worriedly.
"Yes,mom. I have to do some unfinished business first. I'll be back." I assured and Dad nodded at me.
"Just take care of yourself." He said. I nodded before kissing them goodbye. Marinette is not home so I just texted her.
"Ready?" Allison asked when I entered the car.
"As I'll ever be." I answered before closing my eyes.
After we got into Allison's house, She guided me into the room that she personally organized because she knew something like this would happen so she made me a room like the room I had in London. I put my things on top of the bed and throw myself in it. Allison sat down beside me and I know she's waiting for me to tell a story so I didn't waste time telling her.
"What?!" Her voice roared inside my bedroom. I heaved a deep sigh before looking up the ceiling to prevent my tears from falling.
"So you mean, you two broke up earlier? No way!" She said.
"He doesn't want to see me again, Allison. He said he regretted loving me." My voice rattled.
"That's not true. He's just angry,that's all." She tried comforting me but I know better.
Adrien's anger hasn't been lifted over the past years and it seems that I added a fuel to his fire after knowing that Im the reason why his mother died. He's right. No one will love a murderer like me. A murderer. I looked up at the ceiling for a few minutes before Allison decided to leave me alone for a while. I stayed like that until Jinro flew over me with my phone in his hands.
"It's Marinette." He simply said. I took my phone and stared at it before tapping the answer button.
"Ysa! I just got your text. Are you okay?! I know what happened. Nino told us. Do you need anything? I'll come over." She said directly. It's not surprising that the gang will know, Nino is his friend after all.
"No, I don't need all of you. J-just..just stay with him." I said, my voice box seemed to fail me.
"W-what about you? I wanna know if you're okay." I know she's worried. Her voice is gentle.
"I just went on a break up. Of course, Im not okay. But I'll manage. He--he needs all of you. So, don't mind me. I'll live." I answered then ended the call.
"I'll live, just half dead though." I said to myself.
"What are you going to do,now?" Jinro asked.
"Nothing. I'll let myself rot here like an over riped potato." I said before burying my face in my pillow.
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
"YSA! YOU'RE WHITE AS A GHOST NOW! YOU'VE NEVER BEEN OUT IN THE SUN FOR 2 WEEKS NOW! WHAT ARE YOU?! A CONVICT?" Allison shouted outside my door.
"I wish I could just turn myself in to the police." I said causing Jinro to react.
"And being accused for the crime you didn't commit?" He snickered.
"I made all of you worry,huh? I'm such a bad girl." I raised my body up trying to stand from my bed.
"Everyone is worried about you. They've been coming here to check on you but you didn't face them." Jinro said.
"I'm a murderer,Jinro. No one deserves to be involve with me." I replied before walking inside the bathroom.
It's been two weeks since I shut myself in. It's like I'm allergic to people,I can't stand seeing nor feeling their presence. I'm used to being alone,now. I manage to bring myself back to the way I originally was.
"Ysa! You're friends are here! Mind if you get out there and talk to them?" Allison said outside my door.
"Send them home,Ali. I don't need them." I coldly reply. It's my daily routine. Wishing myself that I didn't wake up in the morning, avoiding and sending them away in the afternoon, and cursing myself to sleep in the evening. Just like today.. it's night time already, I can't even remember when was the last time I saw myself in the mirror. Its all dark in here, it's a total darkness. I like it.
"You're not going to eat again?" My kwami asked. I can't see him, it's pitched black.
"No, I don't have an appetite." I answered back.
"You're going to kill yourself." He said and he may not see my face but I'm giving him a cold smile.
"That's even better." I replied in my head.
The night is young and everyone is already sleeping. Yet here I am, staring back at the darkness and still unable to force myself to sleep.
"I don't see my purpose anymore." I said and give a painful chuckle. Jinro didn't react so I figured out he's now fast asleep.
" I said I was fine, but I never said it didn't hurt." I whispered.
"Can I sleep without waking up?" I thought to myself before closing my eyes.
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-End of Chapter Twenty-Eight.