Ever since Ben told us who the third band on the tour is, I'll admit that I've been ignoring everything to do with bonding and getting ready for tour. On the other side of things, my band has been eating up as much time as possible with Black Veil Brides.
In my own defense I have been busy, truthfully. I missed our first meeting because I had a planned dinner with my boyfriend; who proposed to me that night. Then when everyone went out to party, I was crying while I regretted ever laying eyes on the man. Yet another night of bonding, they all went to dinner. This time I was finishing moving into my new house-- one without my ex who I lived with for three years. And the last bonding activity before tour, bar hopping, I was sleeping on my couch, music blaring, nursing the last bruise he can give me.
Now that he's ruined the last bit of my life he can, I have yet to meet Black Veil Brides. Which I've gone years being able to avoid but now, when they're just a green room away, I find it insane to even try to avoid it.
Yet, I'm known to be slightly insane.
Avenged Sevenfold blared from my phone in the dusty green room while I worked on my hair. I'm finally taking the time to listen to The Stage deluxe version. The door creaked, it better just be one of my bandmates with the hope I can just avoid the culprit I continue teasing my white hair.
"Oh shit, this is definitely the wrong room," not even close to being one of my bandmates. The black hair and bandana frame his face.
"Definitely," I let out with a laugh, "We haven't met yet, I'm Lizzy Sky," I introduce myself to the drummer. Okay, so I've avoided meeting them but that does not mean I avoided looking them up. He walks further into the room and introduces himself, "Christian Coma, CC," he smiles at me then drops his band name which I already could've answered. "Black Veil Brides."
"The Wicked End," which I'm sure he's already aware as I'm the dick of a lead singer who didn't show up to literally anything they invited me to. "I realized, now that I've met you I'm gonna guess you named it after the song," he points to my phone still blasting music. I chuckle before my hand passes through my hair, "that obvious I'm a fan?" A small awkward laugh leaves my mouth after I answer. Even in a popular band I'm still embarrassed to be caught being a total fangirl.
"Obvious, but I'm just as big of a fan-"
"Ceese!" A deep voice comes from the hall, "fuck! Can't wait to see you play!" He says before doing a weird jog out of the room. I know that voice, but I've been dreading the meeting since this tour was announced. I'm slightly hoping I've got the band mixed up with another. I know there is no way in hell I could've gotten the band so wrong that I looked them up wrong, because his face was in every. single. picture.
I'm on tour with the one person from high school I didn't get along with. What the fuck! I mean seriously, what kind of karma loving mother fucker cursed me?
"Liz you good?" No. I'm not good. "Liz," Eli's voice snaps me back, "hm? Oh, yeah I'm just in the zone, you know," lies. I'm a liar. "Good, first show of tour. You gotta stay in the zone," Gabe calls out as he walks up behind us. "Your guitar is pressed into my ass dip shit," Eli complains, pushing our best friend away. "You don't even have yours Balum," oh shit they're pulling out last names. "There's two whole fucking sets before we're on!" I'm moving before I get hit. We agreed to this tour as long as we got to be the last set on at least the first night. Just felt like something special and we might as well take it.
"Hey kid," Ben Bruce greets me as I escape my bickering band. "Can you stop calling me kid already for fucks sake?" I whine to the barely older rocker, "I get you're old as shit now but seriously." I let the joke out just for him to kick me in the leg for it. "Ben you practically begged us to join the tour the least you could do is be thankful," I smile toward him, he doesn't respond just laughs and bumps into my side slightly. I turn back to the stage as the crowd screams and the second song starts up. Andy Biersack. The voice that's been mindlessly filling my ears the last three minutes. And suddenly I'm brought back down to reality. This tour, his band, his voice, his dumb smile and bright eyes. Three months, at least that's the deal for now. I was told we might have a second leg added to the tour based on this first month. Fuck. Three months with the one guy who's soul purpose seemed to be to remind me he hated me whenever he saw me.
"Hey! What song are they on?" Twist yells out, running over to everyone. "In The End," Gabe answers him. They really did get close with the band. Part of me wishes I had gone to everything, but after seeing their vocalist... I'm not so sure. "I should do pre show shit with the guys, excited to see the set kid," Ben tells me before walking off. This all just means Andy will be off stage in seconds. I can't crawl into a hole; so I'll settle for hoping I look completely different. I don't have a rememberable voice like him, I don't have the insane eyes he shines everywhere. I have nothing like high school me, I hope. I sure tried to get rid of all the traces of how I looked then.
"You guys are sick live!" Gabe yells to the band while they get their greetings out. "Appreciate it, man. We're excited to hear you guys play," the deep voice responds to my excited band. Why couldn't I have built a band that would hate this guy?
"You have to meet our," say tour manager, say guitar tech, say anything but lead singer, "lead singer," fuck off. I play along and walk over with a friendly smile. "Lizzy Sky," Gabe beams while introducing me, "finally! She was going through all this stuff and moving and shit so I know she wasn't around to meet everyone." He makes excuses for me while I stand silent, arms across my chest just staring into the crew ahead of me.
Andy looks at me, smirks, then holds his hand out. "Andy," I take his hand and we both squeeze, holding eye contact until I pull my hand away. A smirk grows on his face, he pairs it by raising that stupid eyebrow. Daring me to come up with a response.
"Yeah," I say, "I've heard." I'm introduced to the rest of the guys while Asking Alexandria starts their set. This might be the longest tour ever, and the worst favor I've ever done for Ben and Danny. Even with how annoyed I am at the two, I move back to my spot and watch them play.
"How's it going Lizard?" Ah, my favorite man. "Well, ballsack," we both go back to our childish nicknames we pulled for each other in high school. I turned my head to look at him just long enough to make me want to look right back at the stage. "I'm really just wondering how you recognized me," I play around with the words while they come out.
"You still use your first name-- even if your last name is a stage name. I could never forget that look in your eyes you still have after all these years," he answers me. What fucking look? "What do you mean?" I turn to look at the man whose face has fallen back into a cocky smile. "The look where you hate me. You hate me because I could be myself my whole life and not care." That's not fair. Not everyone's parents were the cool Catholics. Some of us had the roof over our heads as a threat our whole childhood. The closest I got to myself was art school. He knows nothing about me but as always will pretend he knows everything.
"So if you decided why I hated you, what was your reason? I had friends? I got along with people? People liked and treated me like a normal human because I did the same back to them? I supposedly had all I wanted handed to me? You know that last one was a favorite to throw around," I taunt back at him.
"If that's what you think," what?
"Are you going to tell me if I was right?" He presses.
"I'll think about it, but while I do, enjoy the show." I walk away to meet with my band and warm up.
He is so fucking full of himself! God, even before he blew up his head was the size of the moon. I seriously don't understand where he gets off hating me.
Antisocialist by Asking Alexandria as From The Heart by The Wicked End:
I had a dream once
All by myself with no one else
I thought I'd died and gone to Heaven
Then I woke up
I look up from the microphone into the crowd. The lights go blue.
And everybody wanted something
Reaching out, don't fucking touch me
So I take pills to induce sleep
But I always wake up
The lights brighten white on me.
I move the stand away and pull it back close to me,
Please, stay away from me
You keep on talking with nothing to say
I don't wanna hear about your life
You make me wanna eat a bullet, bullet,
I dip the stand for the next two lines,
It's on my forehead, four letters off, and
Go forth and spread the word, I don't wanna know you.
I pull the mic off and walk up closer to the edge.
Please, stay away from me
'Cause I don't fucking like you
I had a dream once
I didn't know at the time
The world was perfect in that moment
Then I woke up
I was surrounded by these strangers.
I walk to the other side while I sing out.
Standing close and staring in
So I drink liquor to escape it
But I always wake up
Please, stay away from me
I walk up to Gabe, and he turns while I sing it at him just for fun.
You keep on talking with nothing to say
I don't wanna hear about your life
You make me wanna eat a bullet, bullet
It's on my forehead, four letters off, and
Go forth and spread the word, I don't wanna know you
Please, stay away from me
'Cause I don't fucking like you
I dramatically turn away from him and fall to my knees, holding the microphone under me, looking to the floor while I let out the bridge.
From my heart, I hope you know this song is about you
From my heart, I hope you know this song is about you, yeah
I get up and push the mic back in the stand.
From my heart, I hope you know this song is about you.
I look over at Andy playing it off as me turning with my eyes closed to seem like I'm just extremely into the song. I open them once I'm facing him, though.
From my heart, I hope you know this song is about you
He knows.
Stay away from me
You keep on talking with nothing to say
I don't wanna hear about your life
It's on my forehead, four letters off, and
Go forth and spread the word, I don't wanna know you
Please, stay away from me
Please, stay away from me
'Cause I don't fucking like you
"We were The Wicked End! I'm Lizzy Sky, the fuckers on guitar are Gabe Jones and Eli Balum! That's Howie on bass and Twist is the Animal on drums! Thank you for being an amazing crowd, and thanks to our very close friends Asking Alexandria for blackmailing me into joining them on this tour!" I call out while the band plays behind me, and the lights go dark when I finish.
We walk back to praise from Black Veil Brides, mostly directed to the guys, since I barely met the band. "Lizzy! Your voice is insane," maybe they are praising the whole band. "You perform like crazy, the energy is dope!" CC supports my style, I thank the guys and look over at Andy-- who's just smiling at me. He's got a screw loose.
An arm loops around my shoulders and pulls me close, Ben. "It's not blackmail," I laugh, "threatening to leak the new album if I didn't join the tour to hang out with you isn't blackmail?" I argue with him, "I'm glad we agree on that," fucker.
"Amazing performance Liz," Danny's voice pulls me away from the argument, "you were in on the blackmail too! I'm not forgetting this! I was going to relax and write music until Warped Tour!" I complain, Andy watches as I interact with the artists. What's his problem? "I gotta shower," I excuse myself, greatly appreciating the fact that this venue has showers.
Foot steps follow me as I get to my door, probably one of the guys going to their room. I leave the door open, throwing my leather jacket onto the chair. "You know Ben and Danny?" Fucking Andy Biersack. "Jesus fuck Beirsack you scared me," I let out irritated. He doesn't say shit, just stares like an idiot. If I never answer he may never speak again. "Yeah, very well. Why, you friends?" I spit out, "I'm in a movie with Ben!" He lets out, sounding offended by the fact that I didn't realize. I knew. "Oh shit! Of course you're the Andy in the movie with Ben! God that makes so much sense," I call out, making the connection. He smiles at the fact that I at least heard about him.
"So did you think about it?" What is he on about? "If I was right, on why you hate me," he obviously saw the confusion on my face.
"Oh, yeah I did. That obviously annoyed me, but it's not why I hate you," I answer him. He walks closer and only now do I realize he closed the door when he came in. Creep.
"So why then?" Why is he so intrigued?
"Uh-uh, only if you tell me more about anything we said earlier, why you hate me, how you recognized me," I push to get him to say more.
"You have these eyes," back to my eyes, "they're green but blue around the edge. I'd never forget them. The way you talk, petty and defensive." Holy shit he's going to keep listing things. "And that annoying, captivating look you get where you smirk and dare me to say something with your eyes," I don't do that. I can't believe he had that much to say. "For why I hated you, you could do things while you perform like no one else, you move like you own the stage," he moves closer with every statement. "People admired you, that's why they liked you. They liked you because you liked you more than anything else," is he calling me a narcissist?
"What are you trying to say Biersack?"
"You didn't see it? You walked like you were by yourself while people followed!" I was not some popular snobby bitch! I went to art school to be away from those fuckers.
"You didn't like me because others did?" I laugh saying it, it's so stupid.
"No, I didn't like you because you were a narcissistic bitch!" He finally breaks and admits it correctly with his big boy words. God he must feel so great saying what he's actually thought of me all these years.
"Jesus, Biersack! You're standing here, on tour with a cut off shirt of your band on telling me I'm full of myself! Have you looked in a mirror? Have you seen your past because I have! I couldn't figure out what I did to you! Then I realized it's not worth my time because, shit Andy! You're a big deal now, girls and boys at your feet! You pick! You make the choice! The whole crowd would jump your bones and you know that so well you use it! You've always had the looks. Don't act like you're some poor son of a bitch who had no friends, no girls, you did!" I yell it all out while he watches me with a smirk, show a real emotion asshole! "Say something! Are you fucking mute?" I yell again frustrated.
"You're still a crazy bitch," he answers happy with himself.
"Damn it," I yell before sitting down in the chair, "you're making me feel like I'm 17 again. You asshole! You know I actually grew as a person. I learned how to be sensitive to people, and now I talk to you for a minute and I called you mute like it's a bad thing," I sigh, leaning back. Why would I say that? I would've never joked about that. Fuck. He walks up behind me where I can see him in the mirror, "I believe you."
And then he walks out closing the door behind him. What the fuck was that?