"Greetings, puke puddles!" Perry says as she walks into the cafeteria. Adam, Bree, Leo, and Kyle were sitting at the lunch table eating while Chase and I were still in line getting our lunch. "Tomorrow is yearbook photo day and, while I'm not sure why anyone would want a record of this awkward phase of your lives..." She looks at a blonde-haired boy with pimples and makes a face. "Ugh. I'll be your photographer. Oh, and don't blink, 'cause homie don't do retakes!" She leaves the cafeteria.
"Well, that settles that," Bree says. "I am so getting my hair done right after school."
"Oh! Can you bring me back some clippings off the floor? I need 'em to finish building my taj mahair." Adam says. He shows them a small model made out of hair.
"Where did all of that hair come from?" Kyle asks in disgust.
"Pets, shower drains, brushes...if you want it, you can get it," Adam says.
"Dude, that is disgusting," Kyle says.
"Yeah. Well, if you think that's gross, wait until you see buckinghair palace." Adam says.
"Why are you so concerned about a stupid yearbook photo?" Leo asks Bree as Chase and I sit down at the table.
"I am still trying to live down last year's picture when I wasn't ready for the flash and my eyes glitched." Bree holds up her yearbook photo from last year where she looked like a zombie. Kyle, Chase, Adam, and I cringed at the photo.
"Ugh." The four of us said.
"Bree, your zombie picture was the least of your problems with the yearbook. Perry photo bombed every group picture." Chase says. "Drama club, cheerleaders, swim team..."
"No! No, no, no! None of us need to see that again." Leo says, grabbing the book out of Bree's hands. The bell rings and the students leave the cafeteria.
"Move thirty-two! Hut! Hut!" Trent says as he plays football in the hallway with his friends. A football player passes the ball to Trent and he throws it across the room.
"Trent, what are you doing?" Kyle asks.
"Using football practice as an excuse to knock over innocent bystanders," Trent says.
"But it's not even football season," Kyle says.
"True, but it's always tackling season," Trent says. "Heads up!" He throws the ball to Leo and all of the football players tackle him while he screams.
"Let me help you up," Trent says, walking over to Leo and holding his hand out to him.
"Yeah, right. I'm not falling for that." Leo says.
"Oh, don't worry. I'm only being nice 'cause I need something." Trent says, helping Leo up. "You guys...are gonna help me pass my history test."
"You don't even take history," I say. "The only class you have left is physics."
"And since when do you care about taking tests?" Leo asks.
"There is a lot about me you don't know," Trent says. "I have many layers. I am very dense."
"Yes. Yes, you are." Chase says.
"Look, Perry says I can't fail again," Trent says.
"Oh, but you can. It's kind of your thing." Kyle says.
"Come on, there's gotta be some kind of trick. Like, what's that thing you do that makes you pass tests?" Trent says.
"It's called studying," I say.
"What else you got?" Trent asks.
"How about this? We help you pass, you move football practice back outside." Leo says.
"Yeah. I guess I could do that." Trent says, walking away.
"Hmm. That was easy." Chase says. Trent walks over to the football players.
"Come on, guys, we're taking this outside. And we're gonna need some tackling dummies..." Trent turns to Leo and Chase. Kyle pulls me behind him as the football players run over to Chase and Leo and they grab them and carry them outside while they scream.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Man, I can't stand Trent," Chase says as he, Kyle, Leo, and I walk into the living room after coming home from school. "Why do we have to help him pass his test?"
"Because he's big and we're small. Because Perry likes him and hates us. Because he has all the power and we don't." Leo says. "I could go on and on and on."
"You know, since he needs our help, technically we have the power in the situation. We control what he learns." Chase says.
"Ah, yes. I'm gonna speak in a tone that suggests I know where you're going with this, but wait for you to tell me more." Leo says.
"These are Davenglasses," Chase says, holding a pair of high-tech glasses.
"Gee, someone needs to have their name on everything," I say, taking the glasses.
"They're a subliminal learning device that helps the user rapidly memorize any programmed information," Chase explained. "Here, check out demo mode." I put on the glasses and Chase presses a button on the side.
"The world knows Donald Davenport as the most successful tech mogul of Silicon Valley, but he's so much more. A true fashionista, he's even able to make sequins manly. Let's have a look." I hear Mr. Davenport's voice say on the glasses.
"No, let's not have a look," I say, taking the glasses off and handing them back to Chase. "Okay, those are cool and all, but how are they gonna help us with Trent?"
"We'll get even with him by programming the glasses with fake facts," Chase says.
"The glasses said that Mr. Davenport looks manly. They're already filled with fake facts." I say.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"In a world overtaken by warm bread, one man must take on baked goods alone. Adam Davenport is...the toastmaster." Adam says. A piece of toast pops up from a toaster and Adam uses his heat vision to burn the toast. He rolls on the floor and disintegrates another piece of toast that popped out of another toaster he set up in the lab. He sits on a wheely chair and burns another piece of toast.
"Hey, Adam. What do you think of my hair?" Bree asks, walking into the lab. When Adam turns around, he accidentally burns one side of Bree's hair with his heat vision.
"I hope you kept your receipt, 'cause it looks uneven," Adam says. Bree runs over to the console and looks at her reflection in a toaster. She screams.
"What did you do?!"
"I did what I had to do. Your hair was collateral damage to a world gone mad!" Adam exclaimed.
"The yearbook picture is tomorrow. What am I supposed to do about my hair?" Bree says.
"Well, for starters, you should put on a hat. It's really offensive." Adam says. "Why don't you just go back to the salon and get the same haircut on the other side?"
"You burned it off! A salon can't fix this!" Bree says.
"Well, then why are you paying 'em all that money?" Adam says. Mr. Davenport walks into the lab.
"Mr. Davenport!" Bree says, walking over to him.
"Wow! You look awful." Mr. Davenport says. "What, did you lose a bet?"
"No, Adam did this," Bree says.
"Why would you let Adam cut your hair?" Mr. Davenport asks. "That's on you, girly."
"It was an accident. But you can fix this, right?" Adam says. "I mean, you've gotta have some kind of fancy Davenport hair growth solution."
"Why would I have that?" Mr. Davenport asks.
"I don't know, because you wear that crazy wig," Adam says.
"This is my real hair." Mr. Davenport says.
"Oh, that's even sadder," Adam says. He walks away.
"Well, how am I supposed to take a yearbook photo tomorrow with half of my hair missing?" Bree asks Mr. Davenport.
"Well, it can't be any worse than last year." Mr. Davenport says. He makes zombie noises. Bree gives him a look. "I'm kidding. Don't worry, I'm sure I can modify some over-the-counter hair growth serum to regrow your hair overnight. I'm kind of busy, but I can probably go later..."
"Do it now!" Bree says in a manly voice using her vocal manipulation as she grabs Mr. Davenport by his shirt. She walks away. Adam walks up to Mr. Davenport eating a piece of toast.
"So come on...wig, right?" Mr. Davenport rolls his eyes and leaves the lab.
Upstairs in the living room, Chase, Leo, Kyle, and I were sitting on the couch when the doorbell rang. "That's Trent!" Chase giggles, running over to the door.
"You know, when you laugh like that I can see how Trent picks on you," Kyle says.
"Yeah, and as much as I want to get even with him, isn't this just gonna blow up in our faces when he fails the test?" Leo asks.
"Or maybe he'll never want our help again. Just like you always do a bad job with the dishes so you don't have to do 'em anymore." Chase says.
"Yeah, and I'm always the one getting stuck doing them," I say, crossing my arms.
"Hey, that's only because of my sensitive skin. These dandy hands don't dance in dishwater." Leo says. I just rolled my eyes. The doorbell rings again and I open the door.
"All right, let's make this quick. I got a full schedule tonight." Trent says, walking in.
"Of what, terrorizing kids and destroying private property?" I ask.
"Yeah," Trent says.
"Okay, Trent, since you asked us to help you study for your test, we decided to let you in on a little secret as to how we study and get good grades," Chase says as Trent opens the fridge and pours himself a bowl of cereal.
"Is your secret having no friends and being bad at sports?" Trent asks.
Chase laughs sarcastically and mutters under his breath. "This guy...Look, all you have to do is wear these special glasses for the next few hours. These will implant facts into your brain."
"I don't need the facts, I need the answers," Trent says.
"Those are in there, too," Kyle says.
Chase hands Trent the glasses and he puts them on. "Here's everything you need to know about physics." Trent hears Chase's voice say in the glasses.
"Kinetic energy is the study of energy in Connecticut." Leo's voice says in the glasses.
"Duh. Who doesn't know that?" Trent says.
"Sir Issac Newton chopped down his father's cherry tree and then lied about it." My voice says.
"Oh. I thought that was George Washington." Trent says.
"Thermal expansion occurs when you eat something hot and get huge." Kyle's voice says.
"My dad has that!" Trent exclaimed. He takes off the glasses. "These are awesome! It's just like TV except without commercials, or my mom telling me to put on pants." He leaves the house.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Okay, I have successfully accelerated this over-the-counter hair growth cream to work much faster." Mr. Davenport says as he, Bree, and Adam are in the lab.
"Well, is it gonna work in time for the yearbook picture tomorrow?" Bree asks.
"Well if it doesn't, you can always wear Mr. Davenport's wig," Adam says.
"It's not a wig!" Mr. Davenport says.
"Fine. Toupee." Adam says. Mr. Davenport gives him a look.
"Look, the hair should regrow overnight. Don't worry." Mr. Davenport says.
"I'm not worried." Adam scoffs.
"You should be!" Bree says in a deep voice, using her vocal manipulation, making Mr. Davenport and Adam back away from her.
"That is pure, unbridled girl anger. Fear it." Mr. Davenport says to Adam. He starts to apply the hair cream to Bree's hair until his phone rings. "Shoot, I have a conference call with Tokyo. I forgot they're a day ahead."
"A day ahead? Ask 'em what I'm gonna have for breakfast tomorrow." Adam says. "And it better not be oatmeal."
"Look, just apply a little more and you should be good." Mr. Davenport says, handing Bree the hair cream. He leaves the lab.
"There. I think I got all of it." Bree says as she applies the hair cream in her hair. "Can you check to make sure I didn't miss a spot?"
"Sure," Adam says, taking the bottle from Bree. "Oh, yeah, right there." When he squeezes the bottle, a bunch of cream accidentally falls into his hands. "Uh-oh."
"What do you mean, uh-oh?" Bree asks.
"Uh..." Adam applies the excess cream to Bree's hair. "Oh, you're gonna look so good."
The next day, Adam, Bree, Chase, and I were waking up and stepped out of our capsules. "Hey, it worked," Adam says.
"Really?" Bree asks. When she turns around Adam sees that hair was coming out of her nose and ears and her eyebrows were super bushy and he screams. Chase and I step out of our capsules.
"Adam, what is wrong?" I ask. When Chase and I turned around to look at Bree, we both screamed when we saw her face.
"What?!" Bree asks. She holds up a mirror and screams when she sees her face.
"Wait. Are you screaming because we screamed or because you saw how ugly you looked?" Adam asks. Chase gave Adam a look while I slapped his arm.
At school, Chase, Kyle, and I were hiding on the staircase watching Trent when Leo walked over. "Has Trent got his test results yet?" Leo asks.
"No, but he's about to," I say excitedly.
"I can't wait to see his face when he finds out how badly he did," Chase says.
"You do know he's gonna come after us and we can't outrun him, right?" Leo says.
"Well, I can," Kyle says.
"Oh, Leo. Chase and I don't have to outrun him. We just have to outrun you." I say.
Perry walks out of her office and approaches Trent in the hallway. "Well, Trent, I got the score back on your physics test. You got a hundred percent..."
"Yes!" Trent shouts.
"Of the answers wrong," Perry says. Chase, Kyle, Leo, and I cheer quietly from the stairs.
"Wait. What? That's impossible. I got help from Montgomery, not Dooley, and not Dooley's sister." Trent says. "They even gave me these magic learning glasses." Trent holds out the glasses and shows them to Perry.
"Magic learning glasses? That's dumb even for you." Perry says.
"Wait, I don't get it. They learned me things." Trent says.
"They set you up, feather brain!" Perry says.
"When I find them, I am gonna do this to them!" Trent says, breaking the glasses in half. "Except it's gonna take longer and be a lot more painful." Trent leaves and Perry spots Chase, Leo, Kyle, and me trying to run away.
"Hey!" She says. "You four, get down here!" The four of us reluctantly walk down the stairs and up to Perry. "I hope you four are happy."
"Well, since you asked, I would say we feel ecstatic," Chase says. "What word would you guys use?"
"I feel complete," Leo says.
"All is right with the world," Kyle says.
"I'm tickled pink!" I say.
"Well, enjoy that victory, because if Trent had passed that class, he would have finally graduated," Perry says. "Still feel complete?" She clicks her tongue and walks away.
"Wait, so that means..." I began to say.
"We missed our chance to get rid of Trent forever," Chase says. Trent runs back into the hallway and spots the four of us.
"There you are. I'm gonna chop you down like Sir Issac Newton's cherry tree." Trent says.
"I may be slow, but I know how to play dirty!" Leo says. He stomps on Chase's foot and runs out of the school while Chase grabs his foot in pain.
"Come on, Cass," Kyle says. He grabs my hand and we also run out of the school, leaving Chase alone in the hallway with Trent. Trent growls and Chase runs out of the school screaming.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
While Trent was chasing us, Kyle was standing by his locker with his arms crossed. He didn't have a happy look on his face and was fed up with Trent's bullying. He was waiting for Trent to run back into the hallway so he could put an end to this. "Principal Perry, help! Trent is chasing us!" I yelled as Chase, Leo, and I ran into the hallway with Trent right behind us.
Before Trent could get us, he stopped in his tracks when Kyle stepped in front of us. "That's enough, Trent! I've had it with your bullying. If you want to pick on someone, pick on someone your own size."
"Bring it!" Trent says. As the two boys were about to go against each other, Perry walked into the hallway.
"Hey, you two knock it off!" Perry says, pushing Kyle away from Trent.
"Principal Perry!" Leo exclaimed as he, Chase, and I hid behind her.
"Ahh! Get off me!" Perry says as she shoved us off of her. "The state says I can't fight back, but if I cared what the state said, I wouldn't have wallpapered my kitchen with parking tickets!"
"Look, we're sorry for setting Trent up. Just please, please give him another chance." Chase begged. "We'll help him study."
"For real this time," I say.
"Yeah," Leo says.
"Don't trust them! It's a trap!" Trent exclaimed. "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...I'm gonna hit you!" Trent tried to come at us, but Perry and Kyle blocked him.
"Well, since it wasn't technically Trent's fault, he can retake the test tomorrow," Perry says.
"Ooh! Burned! 'Cause of you four, I gotta take another test." Trent says. "Wait. What?!"
"That gives you four the rest of the day to help him study," Perry says.
"So you don't care if we skip our classes today?" Leo asks.
"I care very little about you," Perry says.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"I've already missed half of school, and my picture is this afternoon!" Bree says as she and Mr. Davenport are in the lab. "My life is over! I'm just gonna drop out and sell trinkets on the side of the road!"
"Honey, nobody would buy anything from you looking like that." Mr. Davenport laughs. Bree gives him a look.
"Fix my face!" She says.
"I don't know what went wrong. I triple-checked the formula, and it's correct." Mr. Davenport says.
"Okay, well then why do I look like a general from the civil war?" Bree asks.
"The only other explanation is that the cream was applied incorrectly. How much did you use?" Mr. Davenport asks.
"I only used a little bit, like you said," Bree says. "And then Adam did the back..."
"Ohh." Bree and Mr. Davenport both say.
"Hold on," Bree says. She super speeds out of the lab and comes back with Adam.
"Hey! What are you doing?! I'd just fallen asleep in math class." Adam says.
"How much of that hair cream did you use on me?" Bree asks Adam.
"All of it." Adam laughs.
"What?!" Bree and Mr. Davenport both shout.
"Well, I accidentally squeezed out too much, and I didn't want hairy hands, so I had to wipe it somewhere," Adam says. "Oh, man, now I do want hairy hands."
"I cannot get my yearbook picture taken looking like this," Bree says.
"Well, if you do, I want an 8 by 10, two coffee mugs, and a mouse pad." Mr. Davenport says. Bree crosses her arms and gives Mr. Davenport a look. "I will look for a more permanent solution, but for now just cut off the excess hair for the photo."
"Okay, but hurry up! I can't be seen like this. Do you have any idea what people will call me?" Bree says.
"Well, mean people might call you sparky the dog face girl, but I'd call you pooches the dog face girl 'cause that's a girl's name," Adam says.
Back at school, Kyle, Chase, Leo, and I were in the gym helping Trent study. "Pressure equals force...over..." Chase was writing on a white board and turned around to see Trent drawing a picture on his notebook. When Trent was done, he showed us his drawing of him as a dinosaur chasing Leo, Chase, and me.
"What is that?" Leo asks.
"Trentosaurus Rex. I'm about to eat you," Trent says. I just rolled my eyes. This is going to be a long day.
"Okay. Maybe he's more of a visual learner." I say.
A minute later, we set up a small model display to see if maybe this will help Trent focus. "So this demonstrates conservation of momentum." Chase tries to explain by doing a demonstration of Newton's pendulum display. Trent wasn't paying attention and continued to draw in his notebook.
"Are you drawing another Trentosaurus Rex?" Kyle asks.
"No!" Trent says. He shows us another drawing. "It's a Trentodactyl. Guess what he eats."
"You're hopeless," I say with my arms crossed.
"Oh, really?" Trent says. He closes his notebook, grabs a dodgeball, and throws it at Chase. The ball hits him hard in the stomach, causing him to fall back into Leo and they both fall backward into a cart of basketballs. I put my hand over my mouth and tried not to laugh while Kyle just rolled his eyes.
"Now that's conservation of momentum." Trent laughs.
"I'm starting to think he only learns when people get hurt," Leo says as he and Chase lie on the floor.
"We can use that!" Kyle says. A minute later, Leo is strapped into a giant gyroscope machine.
"I didn't mean when I get hurt!" Leo exclaimed.
"At least it's not me in that thing," I say.
"This is brilliant, Kyle!" Chase says.
"Thanks. Okay, so here's how it works. For every question you answer correctly, you get to spin the gyroscope." Kyle explains. "The more you get right, the more Leo suffers."
"Wait. What?" Leo says.
"Awesome!" Trent says as he walks over to the gyroscope.
"Nope, not awesome," Leo says.
"Okay, first question. How do you calculate force?" Chase asks as he reads from a card.
"Oh! I know this one! Uh, mass times..."
"Picture Leo spinning fast..." I say.
"Acceleration!" Trent shouts.
"He's right!" Chase exclaimed.
"Nope. Nope." Leo says, shaking his head. Trent laughs evilly while Leo continues to protest and he spins the gyroscope. Chase, Kyle, and I continued to ask Trent questions and he kept getting all of the answers right.
"Torque," Trent says.
"Right!" Kyle says.
"Yahh! Stop the spinning!" Leo shouts as Trent continues to spin Leo.
"Applied force?" Trent says.
"Riiight!" I shouted.
"Kinetic energy!" Trent exclaimed.
"He's right!" Chase says. I couldn't help but laugh as Leo continued to scream and spin the gyroscope.
"Give him a hard one!" Leo shouted.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
In the hallway, one of the walls has been set up as a backdrop, and Bree is sitting on a stool while Perry fiddles with the props. "So, what theme do you want?" Perry asks as she holds up a giant baby bottle. "Mommy's precious baby? Waaaa!" She holds up a giant crayon. "Giant novelty crayon? Rrrrrr!" She holds up a face cut out of herself. "Or my personal favorite, Perry on a stick? Watch out, squat log!"
"Um, I would just like a normal photo, please," Bree says.
"Well, then you should probably get a normal face." Perry laughs. She walks over to the camera and while she begins to set it up, Bree's nose hair starts to grow back slightly.
"Can we hurry this up?" Bree asks.
"Put it in park. I'm trying to figure out the most unflattering settings." Perry says.
Bree yanks out the nose hair. "Please! I can't wait much longer!" She says.
"Settle down! This is not a state-of-the-art camera." Perry says. "I borrowed it from the civil war museum." Bree starts to feel hair growing out of her ear. She quickly covers it with her hair.
"Take the picture!" Bree shouts.
"All right, on the count of three say, I'll never amount to anything," Perry says. "One, two, three." Right as Perry takes the picture, hair rapidly grows from Bree's hair, blocking her face.
"Yeech. Looks like you brought your own props. On the bright side, you got yourself a cover page." Perry says. Bree hops off the stool and immediately knocks over the props due to her vision being blocked by her long hair.
"Whoa. My bad. I'm okay! Who put that there?" Bree says. She ends up falling into the backdrop and ripping it in half. "That is a safety hazard." Bree gets up and moves the hair from her face. "My father will take an 8 by 10, two coffee mugs, and a mouse pad." She leaves the hallway.
Back in the gym, Leo, Chase, Kyle, and I were waiting for the results of Trent's test. "What do we do if Trent doesn't pass?" Chase asks.
"I don't know about you, but I'm gonna aim for your other foot and run," Leo says.
"And I'm gonna move to Hawaii," I say.
"Guys, relax. As long as I'm here nothing is going to happen to you three." Kyle says.
"Well done, guys. Trent passed and finally graduated." Perry says as she walks into the gym. "He's no longer a student at Mission Creek High."
"Yes!" The four of us say.
"He's society's problem now!" Leo says.
"Wait, if he's no longer the captain of the football team, does that mean I get to be the captain?" Kyle asks.
"We'll talk about it, but it's a possibility," Perry says.
"Yes!" Kyle says. We hear a whistle blowing.
"Hi, nerds, miss me?" Trent says. He was wearing a uniform with a whistle around his neck.
"Trent, you graduated. You don't have to be here anymore." Chase says.
"Yeah, shouldn't you be working at a gas station or living at a gas station?" I say. "You belong at a gas station."
"Nope, he belongs here. I just hired Trent as the new gym teacher." Perry says.
"That's right. From now on it's Mister Trent." Trent says.
"That's cold, Terry Perry. That's cold." Leo says.
"He fulfills all the requirements...dirt cheap, high school grad, and he almost passed the psychological exam. Did better than me, anyway." Perry says.
"Thanks for all your help, guys. Now I get paid to torture you." Trent says. "I don't care what my dad says, graduating high school is worth it." Perry gives Trent a high five.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The next day, Chase, Leo, Kyle, and I were sitting on the bench talking when we heard a whistle blowing. "Let's go, short and shorter!" Trent says, walking up to us. "Time to sweat till you cry!"
"It's not even gym class," Chase says.
"Now that I'm here...it's always gym class," Trent says, getting into Leo's face. He makes Chase and Leo jump when he blows his whistle. Trent walks away.
"Don't worry, guys. Trent is going to have to go through me if he wants to get to you. I got your backs." Kyle says, putting his arms around Chase and Leo.
"Thanks, Kyle," Chase says. Bree walks up to us.
"Hey, we saw the yearbook. You take quite a photo, hairy mary." I say.
"Yeah, the junior class just renamed you Señorita Sasquatch," Leo says, making Chase, Kyle, and I laugh.
"Eh, I'm not too worried. People are gonna forget all about my picture when they see what I did to Adam." Bree says.
"Hey, Bree! I don't know where you got that hair gel you gave me..." Chase's, Leo's, Kyle's, and mine's eyes widen when we see Adam walking into the school with a full Afro as disco music begins to play. "But I'm lovin' it," Adam says. We all turned away in disgust when Adam raises his arms and shows us his hairy armpits. "Whooo!" Adam exclaimed.
"Ahhh!" Leo says.
"Ohh!" Chase cringed.
"Eww!" Bree says.
"Gross!" I say.
"Put your arms down, dude!" Kyle cringed.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A/N: We're finally at the last episode of Lab Rats season 2! Yay! I'm so excited! This one is going to be an emotional roller coaster ride for Cassie and her siblings. What do you think is going to happen? Give me your predictions in the comments.
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