"I would choose you in every lifetime"
-Nathan Pierce Knight
I walk out of the bathroom feeling somewhat relaxed, but I frown when my eyes fall on my bed, empty. Where'd she go?
Panic began to set in and I rush out of my room, not even caring to put on a shirt.
"Delilah?" I holler out her name and push open the door of her room but it was empty.
My panic was rising, she wasn't in a state to even sit properly, where could she have gone? Did Micah take her somewhere?
Walking down the stairs I rush into the living room but yet again I was disappointed. Then I heard rustling coming from the kitchen so I rushed there and that's when my eyes fell on her.
She stood by the counter with a bag in her hands.
Walking closer I realized those were the drugs.
"Dove?" I call her out, making sure that my voice was low enough to not startle her.
She lazily drag her eyes off the bag and rest them on me, a tired smile on her face and by her eyes I could tell she wasn't aware of what's going on around her or what she's doing.
"I couldn't sleep" she whisper, her voice raspy and tired. The bags under her eyes were proof enough that she's been at war with herself and it kills me that I can't help her.
Walking towards her I gently take the bag out of her hands and just then she roll up her sleeve and hold her arm out for me and it shattered a piece of my heart.
Even in this state she's starting to realize that these drugs are what's been fogging her nightmares, and now she wants it, and soon she'll be relying on these to silence her demons.
And right now I saw a reflection of myself in her and I don't know if what I'm doing is right, I don't know if drugging her is the right decision but I know I can't see her suffer. Do I want her to go through what I went through? No, never! But I also can't watch her suffer like this and not do anything.
Sucking in a deep breath I pick her up by sliding my hands under her arms like a child and sit her down on the counter.
Buckling a belt around her forearm I glance at her once, she wasn't looking down at me, instead she was facing the other way with her eyes shut tight.
This will be the last time Dove, I can't let you rely on these anymore, and I hope you forgive me for this.
Letting out a breath I carefully push the needle in and I don't miss her little wince that didn't fail to clench my heart.
Rubbing the alcohol pad over it I loosen the belt and pull it off her arm and just like that, the discomfort on her face was gone and she was relaxed. This isn't a good sign.
"Come on Dove, let's get you back to bed" I tell her and before she would jump off the counter, I slide my arms under her knees and back to pick her up in my arms.
She didn't seem fazed at all, instead she just looked at me with a little smile playing on her lips, but I know better than anyone that it's not her real smile, it's the drugs.
Her smiles are warm, her smiles never fail to brighten up my days but this.....this smile stinged my heart.
"You're strong" she mumble in a soft voice and I chuckle softly before climbing up the stairs, holding her firmly in my arms.
Pushing the door open I walk in my room and walk over to my bed, but before I'd lie her down I noticed that the shirt she had on was starting to stick on her wounds.
So instead I turn around and walk towards the bathroom with her still in my arms, her eyes were beginning to get drowsy, which means the drugs have started doing it's work.
Gently putting her on the counter I pull out the first aid kit and rest it beside her.
"I need to clean your wounds Dove" I whisper and her brows knit together with a soft pout sitting on her lips.
Gently un-bottoning her shirt I keep my eyes on her face to make sure she's not uncomfortable, but with the drugs in her, she was completely out of it.
Once I was done pulling open her shirt I lowered my eyes and clench my jaw tight seeing the burn marks along with her old scars.
Taking in a deep breath I pull a Neosporin tube from the box before applying it on the tip of my finger and carefully start spreading it over her bare chest.
She would momentarily hiss when I dab it on the slightly deeper wounds and it made my urge to kill that fucker even stronger.
"It hurts" she whimpers and I didn't had the courage to look at her because I knew if I saw tears in her eyes, nothing will stop me from ripping that son of a bitch to fucking shreds with my own hands.
"Almost done baby" I whisper and focused on applying the tube on her skin.
"I deserve it" she spoke out of nowhere and I drag my eyes on her with a deep frown. She was staring into the space, her eyes were glossy but she had a look of guilt in them.
"You didn't deserve any of this" I grumble. Does she really think that she deserved all of this? What did he do to you to make you believe that Dove?
"I do, because I'm a murderer, I deserve it all because I killed my parents" she continues while tears spill down her face and my frown deepened. Why would she say that?
Standing straight I push her knees apart and stand in-between her legs before grabbing her face gently in my palms, forcing her to look at me with her dropy eyes.
"What you deserve is affection, you deserve being spoiled with love and riches, you deserve every possible happiness this fucked up world has to offer, that's what you deserve baby, nothing less than that" I finish and a couple tears spilled down to her cheeks and I swapped my thumb across her cheek, wiping them softly.
I know she won't remember any of this but she needed to hear it.
Pulling back I slowly pull the shirt off her arms and throw it on the floor before grabbing a new shirt from the drawer and sliding her arms in it carefully.
My shirt was big enough to cover her up entirely so I just picked her back up and walked out of the bathroom and towards my bed.
Lying her in my bed I was about to pull away when her arms tightened around my shoulders followed by a soft whimper.
"Please stay" her voice was like a whisper of a wind, barely audible.
"Dove?" I try to tug away but her hold didn't loosen and I got the message.
Sliding in next to her I pulled her light body against my chest and just like that she was passed out in my arms.
I don't care what he made you believe, Delilah, but I promise you, I will show you what you truly deserve.
~~~~~~~~
"Nate?" Delilah's voice holler and I turn around to find her standing a few feet far from me.
She give me a heart warming smile, standing not far from me, looking like an angel in her white little dress.
I take a step forward and just then I heard a loud bang, a gun fire.
"Nate?" Her painful voice filled the air and in an instant her white dress was now crimson red, covered in blood.
I ran towards her but it felt like I was glued to my position while she crumbled down on the floor, in the pool of her own blood.
I gasp and open my eyes, covered in sweat.
Quickly looking around I found Delilah still asleep in my arms. Letting out a sigh of relief I look at the time, 5am.
It was just a nightmare, but It's starting to feel so fucking real, and there's only one way to assure her safety. His death.
Gently pulling her off my chest I slowly get off the bed.
Making sure that she's comfortable I walk out of my room, leaving the door slightly open. I need a drink.
Climbing down the stairs I walk towards the dining room where I had a mini bar set up with all sorts of drinks.
Pulling out a glass I pour myself some Scotch whiskey and just then heard footsteps behind me.
"Nightmares?" Micah ask and I let out a shaky breath before turning around to face him.
He knows what I suffered from, he witnessed it all, he seen me cry in pain and terror, he seen me on my worst possible days but he's still here.
He might not be my brother from blood but that doesn't change the fact I'd take a bullet for him when need to.
"Want some?" I offer him and he shakes his head, concern clear in his eyes.
Walking towards the couch I take a seat before taking a large gulp.
"Wanna talk about it?" He ask and takes a seat Infront of me and I push my fingers through my hair before letting out a shaky breath, reliving what I saw in that dream.
"Did you..." He hesitate but continues "Did you see her?" His voice came out unsure.
Shaking my head I gulp the rest of my drink before lifting my head up to look at him.
"This time Delilah was in her place, and still I couldn't do anything" I grumble and Micah let out a sigh.
"You know it's just messing with your head Nathan, she's safe, she's here with us and I know more than anyone that you won't let anyone harm her again" he tries to assure me but only Tyler's death will assure her safety. And I was at war with myself because a part of me, the beast inside me wanted to slaughter him right away.
But the other part, the part that is still mourning her, stops me from making any irrational decisions.
But I need to do something and I need to do it soon, I can't watch her like this anymore, I can't let her blame herself like this.
"Do me a favor Mickey, look more into Delilah's past, especially the accident that killed her parents, I need to know more about it" I tell him and he frowns.
"Sure I'll do it, but what brought this up?" He ask and I run a hand through my hair remembering what she said earlier.
"I killed my parents"
Why would she blame herself for an accident, or was it really an accident?
The more I try to figure her out the more complicated her past gets, but to help her fight her demons I need to unravel it all, she will most likely hate me if she knew that I'm digging up her past like this but I need to do this for her.
"I just need to know what caused the accident, I can't leave her alone in this state so you have to do it" I tell him and he gives me a firm nod.
"No worries Nathan, I'll do it myself" he assure me and I rest my head at the back of the couch, letting out a tired breath.
We were sitting in silence until a painful scream erupted from the upstairs. A scream filled with agonizing pain.
It was Delilah!
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End of chapter my lovelies!
Hope you guys enjoyed it!
Sorry for late updates but I been sick and busy for the past few days
But I hope this chapter makes up for it!
Stay tuned for the next chapter!
Lovely reading my sweets!
Peace out✌🏼