CHAPTER FIVE
ALL TALK WITH MANOUCHECA
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"Congratulations on motherhood," Manoucheca said.
The audience applauded.
"Thank you," Sasha said.
"Can you tell us about your journey with that?" Manoucheca asked Sasha.
"Honestly, it was a quiet journey, especially one that I wasn't prepared for because it was really hard and I didn't expect it to be so hard. It wasn't what I imagine my journey would be but my family and friends were really great and super hands-on. I had an at-home birth with doulas and I actually I pulled him out myself. I pulled him out and put him right on me. We did skin-to-skin and everyone was shocked. He was just there on me and we staring at each other and I was like 'I'm your momma' and it was just so surreal and I would not change a thing about it," Sasha explained.
"Awe," Manoucheca said.
"Yeah," Sasha said.
"I love that," Manoucheca said, smiling. So... How old is your son now?" She asked.
"He is one and a half years old," Sasha answered as a photo of her and Jamauri comes on the screen.
"Awe, look at his adorable face," Manoucheca said, looking at the screen. "Oh girl, that's Michael's twin," She commented.
Sasha playfully pouted.
"I know, I feel so used like where's my contribution," Sasha said.
Manoucheca laughs.
"And everyone is constantly telling us how much he looks and acts like Michael and I'm like 'Hey, he got some things from me too' but whatever Michael loves it and Jamauri is a momma's boy so I won at the end of the day," Sasha said.
"Do you take a lot of pictures of him?" Manoucheca asked.
"Oh yeah, all the time. I have a camera dedicated to just taking pictures and videos of him," Sasha answered with a smile.
Manoucheca smiles.
"Yeah, I take too many pictures of him that he just naturally poses when someone pulls out their phone like he knows someone is going to take a picture of him," Sasha told Manoucheca.
"Now do you plan on having more children?" Manoucheca asked Sasha.
Sasha nods.
"Definitely. I want maybe four or six kids," Sasha answers.
"Oh wow," Manoucheca said.
"I want a big family," Sasha said.
"Having a child, how do you handle the demand, you know the transition to motherhood with your career?" Manoucheca asked Sasha.
Sasha nods.
"It's a lot, but I'm so grateful for a great support system... Everyone pitches in to help me out. For me, what's most important is that my son be with me. Whether that is while I'm doing hair and makeup, which takes two hours — that is two hours with my son on my lap playing with me. Then, I'm making the time to also be good to myself, maybe as soon as my son falls asleep. I might take time to binge-watch something on TV and take those moments for myself. I'm grateful that I have such a loving family who has been on this journey with me and who support me," Sasha explained.
"That makes a huge difference. It really is all about being mindful of how you spend your time," Manoucheca said.
"That's the key. When it comes to mindless scrolling on Instagram for an hour, I'm like, No — if there's an hour that I could spend with my son, that's what I want to be doing," Sasha said.
"As someone in the public eye who has to constantly be 'on', how do you prioritize your mental health and wellbeing?" Manoucheca asked Sasha.
"It's exactly that; you have to make it a priority. Carving out days and times where you just put you and your mental health in first place. I think it was about a year ago that myself and my sisters sat down and said, listen, we're going to burnout. We are in such a burnout culture right now...I actually love that the burnout culture is turning its ugly head on itself where now we're seeing memes that are like, no, everything is not about, 'I'm hustling, I'm hustling. Can't stop, won't stop.' No, please stop. Please stop for a second and give yourself a moment so that you do not burn out, so that you can prioritize your mental health. My manager and I actually started scheduling time for my mental health. On my weekly schedule, we'd look at everything. We'd figure out where we'd do anything and then we'd say, you need a day off. So, I would take one day off a week...that was, literally nothing would get scheduled on that one day. And it wasn't always the same because obviously with a demanding schedule, there were people that were like, 'no, we need you on Saturday, so you can't take Saturday off.' And maybe it was the Tuesday that I was able to take off. I love the saying that says, if it doesn't get scheduled, it doesn't get done. Putting into your scheduled time, an hour, two hours, a whole day if you need it. I needed a whole day...just one whole day a week, that I can dedicate to my family, to my mental health and to myself. We make sure that is in my calendar...it is in my planner," Sasha answered.
"So, speaking of mental health and mental wellbeing...I want to learn more about the support systems that you've utilized throughout your career. What support systems have allowed you to thrive throughout your career?" Manoucheca asked her.
"I have to say, I really, really am grateful and I am so fortunate that I have an incredible family. For me, my family really is that. I've always been given wings to soar because I know that I have a strong foundation...having a foundation of people that don't expect me to be amazing all the time. They don't have expectations of me that I have to hold myself up to. I think sometimes that kind of pressure can be really draining and really difficult and really scary and can cause anxiety and depression when you're like, oh my God, all these people are depending on me, all these people are expecting this certain thing from me. I'm really grateful that I've surrounded myself with people who, their expectations of me are to be healthy mentally, physically, and to be happy.
That's the kind of people we need to surround ourselves with. Being mentally happy does mean that I get to have a creative outlet...that I get to pursue my dreams...so for me, I do love working. Working for me is an outlet. I have a creative job...I think the key is to have people who support your dreams, support your goals and ultimately want to see you happy and want to see you healthy. And they're with you in the good times and the bad times. And that they uplift you no matter what," Sasha explained.
"So, are you and Michael back together? Or are you just co-parenting?" Manoucheca asked Sasha.
Sasha smiled as the audience cheered.
"I can't even give you an answer because I have been hot and cold about our relationship status and I know everyone would love for us to be together but it's all about God's timing and we have work to do," Sasha answered honestly.
Manoucheca nods.
"I get it and thank you for being honest about it," Manoucheca said. "Now, you know I've always been a fan of your voice so I have to ask this," She said.
"Thank you... Oh my gosh, I already know what you're about to ask," Sasha said.
"When are you going to release new music?" Manoucheca asked Sasha.
"I have new music coming out soon and you know I'm worried about how fans will react to it because it has been such a long time since I released any material. I'm scared... What if people don't like it?... What if it's not successful?" Sasha answered.
Manoucheca brushed Sasha off.
"Girl, you could release a ten-second audio and it'll do well on the charts. You're a talented artist, your fans and the world knows that, you have nothing to worry about," Manoucheca said.
Sasha laughed.
"I'm just saying I want new music from you, I'm gonna put it out there," Manoucheca said.
"I put a studio in my house and so yeah I'm going to release new music very soon so be on the lookout for that," Sasha said.
"We'll be waiting, that's for sure," Manoucheca said.
"Yeah," Sasha said with a smile as the audience cheered.
"You've had an interesting, diverse career as a singer, actress, TV host, entrepreneur, and producer. What was your initial goal in entertainment, and has your career trajectory surprised you at all?" Manoucheca asked Sasha.
Sasha shakes her head no.
"Not just surprised me — it's shocked me. I came into this industry when I was 10 years old. I loved singing; I loved acting. Crazy enough, when I got into this industry, I wanted to be a singer, and I wanted to do soap operas. I was obsessed with soap operas like "Days of Our Lives" and — at the time — "Sunset Beach" with Eddie Cibrian. My mom would give me $5 for the week, so I would get on the bus and take my money and buy "Soap Opera Digest." I would read about where everyone lives and what they're doing, and I would get on the bus and imagine moving to California. I was obsessed with this idea of making it in the industry, and I knew that I wanted to sing, act, dance, and all those things. What I sought out to do was to get my foot in the door. More than 25 years later, to still be working in this industry is an honor and a privilege. I feel really grateful. It's crazy how you can start your career and have an idea of what it will do, and then these doors open up for you. I'm grateful that I've never been stuck in an idea, like, "Oh, this is what I'm supposed to do or be," because then I would've missed out on a lot of great opportunities," Sasha told Manoucheca.
"Absolutely. I love that. The last question I had was...we're still dealing with the pandemic...we're about to enter a recession. Do you have any advice for women of color entrepreneurs trying to juggle this space of uncertainty that we are in?" Manoucheca asked.
"I think when you look at your own life and your own...whatever it is that you're passionate about, what is the need? What are people needing right now? And I think that's when people's businesses have really flourished. You're seeing a recession is coming. What kind of affordable things can we provide to people that they actually need? As a recession's coming and that brings panic, what kind of things can we provide for people that now give them a pocket of peace? As creatives and entrepreneurs and business people, you can actually find ways to use these hard times in a positive way to help people to...think of what it is that you would want during this time. Even in a recession and even in a pandemic, and even with all of these things going on, you have to give yourself something to look forward to. If we're in a recession, as business people, let's start thinking about how we can cut those costs down and make it cost effective for ourselves and also our consumer. Tapping into the needs of people during hard times is definitely the key," Sasha answered.
"Sasha, seriously, thank you so much for taking the time to talk with me today, and just like, thank you for being you, you're such a fun person!" Manoucheca said.
"Oh my gosh, thank you!" Sasha said as they hugged.