Trolls, gold and wizards, you know? Your average Saturday night.
Tw: Mention of injuries, mentions of bruised/broken ribs (not explicit), sprained ankle
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It had been a few days since the company left the comfort of Bilbo's home. Per usual, Raewyn was walking beside the group. Gandalf had offered for her to use his horse, but she had denied his offer for a multitude of reasons. The first, and foremost; her height would never allow her to ride a real horse, and secondly; Thorin was still very adamant in tiring her. She would not fall for his stupid goal, nor would she give him the satisfaction of showing him his plan was working. So, she walked alongside the ponies. Besides, Kili had grabbed her bag every day so she would have less to carry, much to her relief.
She had been fairly able to keep up with everyone. That was, until the weather decided that rain was exactly what they needed at the moment. The floor had become slippery, which was exactly that what you don't want when you have to walk for at least ten hours.
"Here, Mr. Gandalf? Can't you do something about this deluge?" Dori asked over the rain.
"It is raining, master dwarf," Gandalf returned, "and it will continue to rain until the rain is done! If you wish to change the weather of the world, you should find yourself another wizard!"
Dori didn't speak back to him, a new silence filling the air. "Are there any?" Bilbo spoke up, now curious about the wizards. "What?" Gandalf shot back confused. "Other wizards?" The hobbit elaborated.
At that, Gandalf's face turned into a smile and his eyes shone a little. "There are five us. The greatest of our order is Saruman, The White. Then there are the two blue wizards." The wizard took a short break, as if thinking of something. "Do you know, I've quite forgotten their names."
"Alatar and Pallando." Raewyn filled in, sending a smirk the old wizard's way.
"And who is the fifth?" Bilbo asked, now looking towards the young woman, who was completely drenched in rain droplets while her armor let little waterfalls run from her shoulders. "Radagast The Brown." The woman answered, now looking back ahead with the same smirk she wore before.
"Is he a great wizard," the hobbit started, "or is he more like you?" He wondered, his question now directed towards Gandalf. Raewyn allowed a small snicker to escape her mouth, but she quickly recollected herself. "I think he's a very great wizard, in his own way." Gandalf defended. "He's a gentle soul who prefers the company of animals to others. He keeps a watchful eye over the vast forestlands to the East, and a good thing too, for always evil will look to find a foothold in this world."
"He's a sweetheart," Raewyn added, "but he's a little...." she tapped her temple twice, signifying the wizard to be a bit strange. Bilbo nodded at her and looked back ahead.
Suddenly, a pony passed her quickly, the rider muttering something close to "please, hide." She looked up to face him, but the dwarf had already moved. She didn't need to see his face in order to know it was Fili. His blond hair was quite difficult to not recognize.
"Why would I need to hide?" She mumbled to herself, wiping the strands of hair that had stuck to her face behind her ears.
"My fair maiden," someone suddenly spoke, as Raewyn shut her eyes tightly, her lips forming in a thin line. "'My fair maiden'?" The woman repeated, looking at the person - and pony - beside her.
"Well, you don't wish to be called 'my lady' so-" "Just Raewyn is fine." She quickly interrupted, holding her hand up. "What do you need?"
Kili coughed a little, but continued. "I was noticing how awful this downpour was and how awful it was to see you walking. Not that it wasn't awful to see you walking earlier, but right now the weather is so numb and...." He looked back at her face, but all she gave him was an almost mocking glance. "Right...how is this going?" He asked.
"Terrible."
"But....?" He continued, wondering if there was more.
"It's terrible." Raewyn clarified. The dwarf nodded and jumped down from his pony. He gestured towards the creature, making the woman frown. "Words are not my strongest point." Kili explained. "And actions are?" Raewyn joked.
"Clearer than speech. Get on the pony." He urged, pushing her towards the animal that had now stopped walking. The woman pushed his hands off quickly and shook her head.
"And let you walk?" She shot back.
"It's either you get on the pony or we both walk." The dwarf stated.
When he made it clear he wouldn't take no for an answer, Raewyn sighed and mounted the pony. "Well played, Kili." She said, taking a hold of the reins. When she nudged the pony to walk, Kili set his pace beside the two. A thought suddenly came into her mind as her eyes widened.
"You did this on purpose." The woman accused. "You're forcing me to spend the day with you. You knew that a ranger wouldn't run off with a given horse."
Kili shot a bright smile her way and nodded. "Even if you had refused, I would've walked nonetheless."
"Well played indeed, little goblin." Raewyn mumbled, gripping the reins of the pony tighter.
"I'll just propose it again tomorrow, now that I know it works." Kili revealed, smiling to himself as he walked beside Raewyn.
——
"We'll camp here for the night." Thorin decided when they passed, what appeared to be, a ruin of an old farmhouse. "Fili, Kili, look after the ponies. Make sure you stay with them."
Gandalf looked around and frowned at the sight of the ruined house. "A farmer and his family used to live here." He spoke to no one in particular, but Raewyn and Bilbo had heard him.
"Oin, Gloin," the leader resumed. "get a fire going."
"Right, you are." Oin spoke back, gathering firewood with his brother.
"We cannot stay here." Raewyn mumbled, recognizing huge marks on the ground amongst the house.
"No, we cannot." Gandalf confirmed, walking up to Thorin. "I think it would be wiser to move on. We could make for the hidden valley." "I've told you already, I will not go near that place." The dwarf defended, crossing his arms tightly.
"Why not? The Elves could help us, we could get food, rest, advice." "I do not need their advice." Thorin argued, not turning back on his decision or opinion.
"We have a map that we cannot read. Lord Elrond could help us." Raewyn winced at the name, realizing this might be a conversation she didn't necessarily need to be part of. She took a few steps back and walked towards Bilbo, who was looking at the open fields in front of him, marveling at the sky which had slowly began to turn darker.
"There was a time I would've been jealous at you." Bilbo said, turning around to face the woman.
She shot him a questioning glance, not quite catching his meaning. "When I was younger, I would've given everything to live in the wild. To wander among forests and mountains. To spot the most shining rivers and lie beneath the stars each night." Raewyn smiled at the slightly smaller creature and looked towards the grassy fields.
"And now, all you want to do is go back home?" She asked. The hobbit made a humming sound, but shook his head. "I'm not quite sure anymore." Was his answer. The two stood there in silence, looking towards the horizon, all their worries momentarily fading away. That was, until Gandalf stormed out angrily, walking past the two, not saying a word.
"Everything alright? Gandalf, where are you going?" Bilbo asked, turning around, following the wizard. "To seek the company of the only one around here who's got any sense." "And who's that?" The hobbit continued walking, but Raewyn grabbed his shoulder, urging him to stop.
"Myself, master Baggins! I've had enough of dwarves for one day." And with that, the grey pilgrim disappeared out of sight.
"Come on Bombur, we're hungry." Thorin grumbled, seeing the fire has already been set.
"Is he coming back?" Bilbo asked the young woman, but she just shrugged at him: "I truly wouldn't know, but I don't suspect he would leave us all behind."
——
The sky had turned dark, the moon now more prominent than before. Raewyn had taken it upon herself to search the area, looking for any source that might have destroyed the farmhouse. And if she could, determining whether they were still in danger or not.
In the mean time, Bilbo had been urged to stay at the camp site, not leaving the company of dwarves. He had been adamant to go with Raewyn, but when he found out she was looking for something that caused the destruction, he let her go her own way, saying something among the lines of "keeping the dwarves in line".
"He's been a long time." Bilbo mumbled.
Bofur looked at the hobbit, seeing as he might the only one who heard him talk. "Who?"
"Gandalf." Bilbo spoke.
"He's a wizard! He does as he chooses. Here. Do us a favor, take this to the lads." Bofur decided, pushing two bowls of stew into Bilbo's hands.
The hobbit walked away, the question of Gandalf still on his mind. He quickly spotted the two dwarves sitting among the ponies, distraught looks on both of their faces. "What's the matter?"
"We're supposed to be looking after the ponies." Kili began, looking at Bilbo. "Only we've encountered a slight problem." Fili finished. "We had sixteen."
"Now there's fourteen."
The dwarves stood up and wandered among the creatures, counting the amount of ponies.
"Daisy and Bungo are missing." Kili revealed. "What? Well, that's not good." Bilbo began, spotting a uprooted tree. "And that is not good at all. Shouldn't we tell Thorin?"
"Uh...no. Let's not worry him. As our official burglar, we thought you might like to look into it." Fili explained.
"Well, uh...it looks as if something big uprooted these trees." The hobbit spoke, stating the, almost obvious. "That was our thinking." The dark haired dwarf said, now looking back at the tree.
"It's something very big, and possibly quite dangerous." Bilbo spoke, almost terrified of the thought of what might have caused the damage. It might've been the same thing Raewyn was looking for. At that thought, his heart did a little skip.
"Raewyn...." He mumbled quietly. Raewyn might've been strong, but she was no wizard like Gandalf. Kili's head turned towards the hobbit.
"What's with Raewyn?"
"Hey! There's a light." Fili spoke hushed, crouching below the tree. "Over here!" The other two neared, Bilbo still carrying the bowls of stew.
"Stay down." Fili warned. "What is it?"
"Trolls." Kili mumbled lowly. The dwarves ran towards the band of trolls quietly, but remained far enough to not be seen. Bilbo followed them quickly, the two bowls shaking with every step he took. When he was close enough, a troll emerged from the trees, carrying two ponies.
"He's got Myrtle and Minty! I think they're gonna eat them, we have to do something!" Bilbo stated.
Kili's eyes widened. "Yes, you should." He spoke, nodding his head. "Mountain trolls are slow and stupid, and you're so small. They'll never see you."
"Me? Me? No. No. No." The hobbit defended, shaking his finger. "It's perfectly safe!" "We'll be right behind you." Fili started too, grabbing the two bowls from Bilbo.
"If you run into trouble hoot twice like a barn owl, once like a brown owl."
With that, Bilbo was pushed away from the trees, still going over everything Fili had just said. "Twice like a barn owl, hoot twice like a brown...hoot like a...like a... Uh, are you sure this is a good idea?" But as he turned around, the two dwarves had already disappeared.
"Mutton yesterday, mutton today. And blimey, if it don't look like mutton again tomorrow." One of the trolls complained. Bilbo quickly his behind some bushes, slowly crouching towards the ponies.
"Quit your griping. These ain't sheep! These is fresh nags!" Another one spoke, stirring the pot.
"Oh! I don't like horse. I never have. Not enough fat on them." "Well, it's better than a leathery ol' farmer. All skin and bone he was. I'm still pickin' bits of him out o' me teeth." As the trolls continued to argue and speak, Bilbo looked around for some form of weapon to cut the rope. He crawled over the floor, careful as not to be seen.
When one of the ponies spotted him, it started making noise, as did the others. The hobbit immediately shushed them and looked around. Behind one troll, he saw a small silhouette in the unmistakable shape of Raewyn's armour. He let out a sigh of relief and called her name.
The woman held her finger in front of her mouth, ushering him to be quiet. She unclasped one of her daggers and held them up for Bilbo to see. He quickly took the hint and nodded. With much care and silence, she threw the dagger across the floor. Not hard enough to launch it into anything, but enough for Bilbo to be able to grab it from the pile of leaves.
Raewyn carefully walked around the trolls, hiding behind trees and bushes. When she had a good sight of all three of them, she quietly grabbed her bow and arrow and aimed it towards the most intimidating one. She would not risk the chance of Bilbo being seen and she made that quite clear.
She knocked her arrow and send it flying straight towards the eye of the biggest one. It growled in pain and took a few steps back. Raewyn hid back against a tree, but made sure to still keep Bilbo in sight.
"Where did that come from?" The youngest one asked, standing up. The troll pulled the arrow out and inspected it. "One of 'em rangers again." He raged, now scanning his surroundings.
When he looked towards the ponies, he spotted Bilbo, which Raewyn took as her sign to shoot again.
As she hit the troll's hand, he turned around and faced the ranger. "'Ere she is!" He said, now storming towards the smaller woman. She quickly clasped her bow on her back and grabbed her sword. She would not win this fight with weapons, but she could stall for the time being. When the youngest neared, she slipped between his legs, slicing one of his ankles. He exclaimed in pain, but kept standing.
The second one, which was the only one remaining seated, had grabbed one of the mugs and threw it towards Raewyn. She rolled herself over the floor in protection, the mug missing her body by inches.
When she stood back up again, she could see Bilbo cutting the thick rope that held the ponies in place. Only a little while and he'd be able to run away. Her gaze however, was not so subtle, and one of the trolls followed it. When he spotted Bilbo, he growled and leapt towards the hobbit.
Raewyn acted quick and stood back up, throwing a dagger its way. When it lodged itself into his calf, the troll staggered back, now angrier than before.
"What are you doing?" She heard behind her. She took a fast look behind and spotted Fili hiding in one of the bushes.
"Distracting." She mumbled back, now looking back at the trolls. "You're not really doing a great job." He remarked.
"Shut up." Raewyn quipped back, engaging the trolls again.
Just then, the company of dwarves burst out of the bushes, charging towards the three huge creatures. Without a second of hesitation, she ran towards Bilbo, helping him with the rope. While the other 13 were busying the trolls, the two creatures fought with the disgusting rope. When it finally snapped, Raewyn pushed Bilbo behind her, freeing the ponies. The band ran off as both of them let out a sigh of relief.
Turning back around, Raewyn spotted a troll nearing her and Bilbo. "Run." She told Bilbo, shoving him towards the bushes.
With a little push, the hobbit stumbled, but did not run off. The ranger had already busied herself with the troll, leaving Bilbo to take off on his own. In hindsight, he shouldn't have stood there staring at the Asha as she foolishly took on one of the trolls by herself. He hadn't realised that until he was dangling in the air, in the hands of the third troll, who was smiling at him menacingly.
"Bilbo!" Raewyn shouted, already preparing to grab her bow, but the troll was faster, kicking the small woman away until she landed against a tree. With a grunt, she fell down, her vision hazy, but clear enough to now see two trolls holding up Bilbo. Fili quickly ran towards Raewyn, standing in front of her to give her time to recover. Time she had found extremely useful, had it not been for the uncomfortable position her foot was in.
"Lay down your arms! Or we'll rip his off!"
Doubt flooded the company momentarily, before - with much reluctance and contemplation - Thorin threw down his sword, followed by the rest of the company. Bilbo stared at the dwarves, but made no further move to tell them to keep fighting. Raewyn merely glowered at the three giant creatures, cursing them quietly.
———
After a short while, the company was either tied up in sacks, or dangling over a giant fire pit. Raewyn had fortunately been placed in a bag, but she was laying close enough to the fire to feel sweat drip down her back. Her hair had returned to its former clammy position on her forehead, while she tried to get her hands free as silent as possible.
"Don't bother cooking 'em! Let's just sit on 'em and squash 'em into jelly!" One of the trolls suggested, eyeing the pile of tied up dwarves.
"They should be sauteed and grilled with a sprinkle of sage." The bigger one protested.
"Oh, that does sound quite nice." "Never mind the seasoning, we ain't got all night! Dawn ain't far away, let's get a move on! I don't fancy been turned to stone." The third one complained, twisting in his seat.
"Wait!" Raewyn suddenly heard. Her head shot up, looking at the hobbit who, stupidly enough, made the decision to talk to them.
Bilbo stood up in his sack and hopped towards the bunch. "You are making a terrible mistake."
"You can't reason with them, they're half-wits!" Dori protested from his spot. "Half-wits? What does that make us?" Bofur shouted back, who was dangling from above the pit.
"I meant with the...uh, with the...with the seasoning." Bilbo tried.
"What about the seasoning?" The cook wondered, suddenly interested. "Well, have you smelt them?" The hobbit began, making a disgusted face. "You're gonna need something stronger than sage before you plate this lot up!"
Shouts of disagreement were heard amongst the dwarves. Few threatened Bilbo as Raewyn just sat there, confused by the sudden noise.
"What do you know about cooking dwarf?" The biggest one asked, now standing up and looking down at the tiny creature.
"Shut up, and let the...uh, flurgerburbur-hobbit talk." The cook interrupted, defending Bilbo suddenly.
"Uh...the-the secret to cooking dwarf, is um..." The hobbit began, now not so sure of what to say anymore.
"Yes? Come on."
"It's, uh..."
"Come on! Tell us the secret!"
"Ye-yes, I'm telling you." Bilbo urged, thinking of something to respond with.
"The secret is...to...skin them first!" He spoke suddenly, making Raewyn widen her eyes. "I'll kill him!" Dwalin shouted, twisting and turning on top of the burning pile. The woman below desperately tried to get her arms out of the rope, but it continued to dig into her skin.
"Tom, get me filleting knife." One spoke, looking directly at the young woman.
"What a load of rubbish! I've eaten plenty with their skins on. Scoff 'em I say, boots and all!" One spoke, somehow bringing relief to Raewyn, now aware that she wasn't in direct danger anymore as the cook turned away from here.
"He's right! Nothing wrong with a bit o' raw dwarf." The youngest spoke, picking up Bombur and holding it over its mouth. "Nice and crunchy."
"Uh...not...not that one, he...he's infected!" Bilbo nearly shouted.
"You what?"
"Yeah he's got worms in his...tubes." The hobbit explained.
"Ooh!" The youngest shouted, making a disgusted face and throwing the round dwarf back down.
"In-in fact, they all have." The hobbit announced, happy it was working. "They're infested with parasites, it's a terrible business, I wouldn't risk it, I really wouldn't." He recommended.
"Parasites? Did he say parasites?" Oin asked insulted.
"Yeah, we don't have parasites!" Kili shouted. "You have parasites!" He spoke to Bilbo.
Realization began to dawn on Thorin and Raewyn. Raewyn was too far away from the dwarves to say anything, but Thorin was able to kick the pile, silently telling them to just join.
"I've got parasites as big as my arm!" Oin suddenly spoke.
"Mine are the biggest parasites, I've got huge parasites!" Kili joined in.
"We're riddled!"
"Yes, I'm riddled!"
"Yes, we are, badly!"
Then the youngest turned to Raewyn again, causing her eyes to widen.
"What about 'er then? She's no dwarf." As Bilbo sought an excuse, the troll's hand had already reached towards the woman. "Rabies!" She suddenly exclaimed. "I have rabies!"
The troll took a step back and frowned. "You don't look like you have rabies."
"Now, how would you know? If you eat me, you'll get it too." She defended. Bilbo shook his head in agreement, grateful for the quick response of the woman.
"What would you have us do then? Let 'em all go?"
"Well..." The hobbit spoke honestly.
"You think I don't know what you're up to. This little ferret is taking us for fools!" "Ferret?" Bilbo asked insulted.
"Fools?"
"The dawn will take you all!" Gandalf spoke loudly, standing on top of a huge boulder. Raewyn sighed and let a shaky breath.
"Who's that?" One troll wondered aloud.
"No idea."
"Can we eat him too?"
The wizard broke the cliff he was standing on, splitting it half. Sunlight poured over the company and the trolls. the latter rapidly morphing into stone, making shouts of excitement run through the group.
Gandalf quickly freed them all, tossing the empty sacks onto the fire pit. When he came to Raewyn, she quickly stood up, her ankle shouting in protest, but nothing she couldn't handle.
"Rabies?" The wizard mumbled amused. "Would you have been here earlier, I wouldn't have had to use that lame excuse." The woman playfully retorted, getting herself free of her binds. When she saw Thorin approaching, she gave Gandalf a short nod and walked, nay, stumbled over to Bilbo.
"Are you okay?" She asked him, looking at the hobbit as if hoping to find any injury.
"I'm fine." Bilbo said, shaking his head. "But I don't think I'd like another encounter with trolls." Raewyn let out a quiet laugh at that.
"You and me both."
"They must have come down from the Ettenmoors." Gandalf announced, walking past the two.
"Since when the mountain trolls venture this far south?" Thorin asked, following the wizard's footsteps.
"Oh, not for an age. Not since a darker power ruled these lands." The pilgrim thought for a while, before looking back around. "They could not have moved in daylight."
"There must be a cave nearby." The dark haired dwarf filled in, catching onto Gandalf's words. He nodded in agreement as Raewyn frowned.
"Trolls hoards," she mumbled to Bilbo. "they carry a smell worse than death."
——