𝔏𝔬𝔫𝔡𝔬𝔫, 𝔈𝔫𝔤𝔩𝔞𝔫𝔡, 𝔈𝔞𝔯𝔱𝔥
𝔄𝔭𝔯𝔦𝔩 2005
Being only twenty, there were a lot of things that EJ didn't understand. His upbringing, for example, and why he had to get the raw end of the deal. He didn't understand why things were the way they were, and why he couldn't change them as much as he tried. He didn't get the Doctor, where he came from, or what he was about.
But, being trapped in a political office with him, did mean that he learnt a lot in a small space of time. Such as, the Doctor was clever. He somehow managed to hook Rose's phone up to the microphone speakers so they could all hear exactly what was going on in Mickey Smith's flat.
"Say again." The Doctor prodded the phone a moment, hoping to hear what was being said.
"It's asking for the password." The voice called through the telephone, and into the telecom, as clear as if they were stood right beside each other. It was freaky.
"Buffalo." Replied the man, absentmindedly. "Two f's, one l."
When Rose's mother, Jackie, took the phone, EJ zoned out slightly. He knew that she was going to say something that didn't apply to him, and he was correct. She was worried about her daughter more than anything, which in turn, only made him worry more about his own family. He didn't even know if they were safe or not.
There were just so many of them to keep a track of, and they all mattered to him more than anything. If only his phone had the same powers as Rose's, then he would be able to find out. He wouldn't have to live in such suspense to know that none of them had been in trouble. But Mickey was clogging up the line, meaning he had to wait.
If he was alive by the end of the night, EJ would call them as soon as he could. They were always on his mind, no matter what he was doing, or where he was. Although, the pressing alien matter might have been a little more important for the existence of the human race.
"All of the secrets known to mankind." The words caught EJ's attention for one reason or another, bringing him back into the conversation. Mickey was complaining again. "See, they've known about aliens for years. They just kept us in the dark."
"Mickey, you were born in the dark." The Doctor shrugged him off. He didn't need any of the added pressure.
Rose sighed. "Oh, leave him alone."
"Thank you." Replied the boy, exasperated.
"Gold." EJ's eyes widened as he blew air into his cheeks. "Pure gold."
Mickey came back on the line, or more likely, he never left. This time, it was more relevant. "Password again."
"Just repeat it." He was told, almost like a naughty child. "Every time." Just as the phone was passed over to Jackie again, the Doctor continued thinking out loud. "Big Ben." He must have been anxious as he kept counting around the room: it must have helped him think. "Why did the Slitheen go and hit Big Ben?"
"You said to gather the experts, to kill them." Harriet offered, closing up the Emergench Protocols briefcase.
"That lot would've gathered for a weather balloon." He dismissed. "You don't need to crash land in the middle of London."
"The Slitheen are hiding, but then they put the entire world on red alert." Rose thought out loud, her conclusion forming into a better idea than the rest of them. "What would they do that for?"
"Oi! Listen to her!" Jackie scolded through the phone.
"Oi." Her daughter countered, just as fiercely. "Least I'm trying."
"I am trying." EJ sneered. "It's bloody hard, though."
"Well, I've got a question, if you don't mind?" Rose's mother announced, offering little chance for a dispute before continuing. "Since that man walked into our lives, I've been attacked in the streets, I've had creatures from the pits of hell in my own living room, and my daughter disappear off the face of the Earth."
EJ realised that Rose had left home to travel with the Doctor, but he had no idea she had gone missing. It did make him question it all slightly, and if it was right, him hanging around them. Would he ever come back if he left? He didn't know if there was a big enough reason to: he loved his family, but adventure was all that he craved.
Rose snapped back. "I told you what happened."
"I'm talking to him." Jackie replied, her authority taking hold. "Cos I've seen this life of yours, Doctor, and maybe you get off on it, and maybe you think it's all clever and smart, but you tell me- just answer me this- is my daughter safe?"
Safe...
"I'm fine." Rose laughed, awkwardly.
"Is she safe?" Jackie persisted. "Will she always be safe? Can you promise me that?"
Safe was a luxury only granted to EJ by death. Not his own, thankfully, but it seemed a high price to pay. If only he had been allowed safety sooner, he might have turned out differently. He might not have been so reckless... he might not have met the Doctor.
Rose looked at the man, who in return, looked at her. Something must have happened that they weren't talking about.
"Well," Jackie came through again. "What's the answer?"
EJ supposed they were when Mickey spoke, because it meant they didn't have to answer. "We're in."
Once again in his element, the Doctor ran around the table, hands pressing against it as he leant over. "Now, then, on the left, at the top, there's uh... a tab, an icon, little concentric circles." It was fascinating to watch him. "Click on that."
As he did, a sort of shrieking groan came through the speakers, warping and contorting. "What is it?"
"The Slitheen have got a spaceship in the North Sea and it's transmitting that signal. Now, hush, let me work out what it's saying... it's some sort of message."
Quietly, Rose asked. "What's it say?"
"Don't know, it's on a loop, keeps repeating." Then, a new sound came through the phone; a knocking. "Hush!"
"That's not me." Mickey defended himself, having had enough of the Doctors taunting for one day. "Go and see who that is?"
"It's three o'clock in the morning." Jackie exclaimed.
"Well, go and tell them that."
"It's beaming out into space." The Doctor mumbled. "Who's that for?"
Flatly, EJ replied. "Aliens."
Then, through the speakers, Mickey panicked. "They've found us."
"Mickey, I need that signal!"
"Never mind the signal, get out!" Rose shouted, strained. "Mum just get out! Get out!"
"We can't. It's by the front door." Mickey informed. "Oh my God. It's unmasking. It's gonna kill us."
"There's got to be some way of stopping them!" Harriet announced, her voice trembling as Mickey's heavy breaths came through the phone, and the signal disappeared. "You're supposed to be the expert- think of something!"
"I'm trying!"
"I'll take it on, Jackie." They heard the boy say. "Don't look back. Just run."
Because they couldn't see exactly what was going on, they could only assume that the loud crashes and bangs were a result on the imposing Slitheen. The whimpers in the background did not go unnoticed, but from that small room, there was very little they could do.
EJ was totally useless, and not for the first time in his life, which felt rather humiliating. He offered a hand to Rose, who's voice was cracking as she stared straight at the man she had placed so much trust into.
"That's my mother."
The Doctor seemed to pause for a moment, and take a heavy breath. His anxiety did not go unnoticed by the others surrounding him- but it was like he pulled on a mask, as his behaviour changed so drastically, it was impossible to witness. EJ wondered if Harriet was thinking the same way he was.
"Right!" He was spritely now, a clear plan in his mind. "If we're gonna find their weakness, we need to find out where they're from, which planet. So, judging by their basic shape, that narrows it down to 5,000 planets within travelling distance. What else do we know about them? Information!"
"They're green!" Rose blurted.
"Yep. Narrows it down."
She continued. "Good sense of smell."
"Narrows it down."
"They can smell adrenaline."
"Narrows it down."
"The pig technology." Harriet added.
"Narrows it down."
"Spaceship in the Thames." Rose struggled to get the words out, and EJ didn't know how they were doing it. They were remembering every little thing, and he could barely think of something cohesive ant to say. "You said..."
"Slipstream... engine." EJ blabbed, gracelessly, he sounded like an idiot as he spoke, but the words were right. He felt proud that he was able to contribute, even if it wasn't much.
"Narrows it down."
Mickey called out again, more frightened this time than before. "It's getting in!"
"They hunt," Rose was taken by surprise. "Like a ritual!"
"Narrows it down."
"Wait, did you notice?" Harriet interrupted, offering her observations. "When they fart, if you'll pardon the word, it doesn't just smell like a fart, if you'll pardon the word, it something else? What? It's more like, um..."
The blonde girl exclaimed. "Bad breath!"
"That's it!" Harriet felt a wash of relief, knowing the answer.
"Calcium decay!" The Doctor almost laughed. "Now that narrows it down!"
"We're getting there, Mum!" Rose called into the phone, hoping that there would be enough time to help them.
Mickey replied. "Too late!"
"Calcium phosphate, organic calcium, living calcium, creatures made out of living calcium. What else?" The Doctor encouraged them, though it seemed to be more for himself. "What else? Hyphenated surname! YES! That narrows it down to one planet! Raxacoricofallapatorius!"
"What the fuck?" EJ mumbled, not even understanding what had just been said.
"Yeah, oh great. We can write 'em a letter!" They could hear the short screams coming through the phone, and feeling helpless was sickening.
"Get into the kitchen!" The Doctor crouched down by the phone, even though he didn't need to.
Jackie cried. "Oh, God. It's going to rip us apart!"
"Calcium weakened by the compression field..." The Doctor echoed the facts- and then it came to him. "Acetic Acid! Vinegar!"
Harriet laughed to herself. "Just like Hannibal!"
"Just like Hannibal!"
There was so much excitement at the idea, though it had not yet been proven, EJ's joking remark was barely heard. "You're my kind of woman, Harriet!"
"Mickey, have you got any vinegar?"
"How should I know?!"
Exhasperated, the Doctor shook his head. "It's your kitchen!"
"Cupboard by the sink." Rose instructed. "Middle shelf."
Jackie snatched the phone from her daughters boyfriend. "Oh, give it here. What d'you need?"
"Anything with vinegar." The Doctor commanded, his face slightly red.
The sound of cupboards opening and closing with squeaky doors filled the room as they waited to se if they had a simple condiment to save their lives. The day was just getting more and more ridiculous.
"Gerkhins!" Jackie exclaimed, eventually. "Yeah, pickled onion! Picked eggs!"
The Doctor rolled his eyes. "You kiss this man?"
"Why?" EJ chuckled, still trying to make kinky of things, though he knew that if he was in Rose's position he would have been in much more of a state. "Jealous, Doctor?"
Then they heard the door break into nothing less than splinters, cracking like bones beneath the sheer force of the alien being. A screech sounded, like nails on a chalkboard, shrill and twisted. They held a collective breath, just waiting to see what happened. There was an odd sort of squelching before the sound of something bursting. The aftermath of things dropping to the ground came soon after.
It was sigh a relief when they realised it could have only come from the Slitheen and it's reaction to the vinegar.
"Hannibal?" Rose asked, eventually, amidst their smiles.
"Hannibal crossed the Alps by dissolving boulders with vinegar." Harriet explained, causing a deep confusion from EJ.
"Oh, I thought we were talking about Hannibal Lecter." The blonde said, almost embarrassed. "Less of my kinda woman now, Harriet, sorry 'bout that."
"Oh, well, there you go." Rose raised a glass she had filled with the port they had discovered, pouring some for everyone else to join her. And they did, of course, having saved her only family from what would have otherwise been a horrific death.
Although, they weren't allowed much time to rest as Mickey pushed his phone closer to the tv. "Listen to this!"
"Our inspectors have searched the sky above our heads. And they have found... massive weapons of destruction, capable of being deployed within 45 seconds..."
"What?" The Doctor asked, befuddled.
"Our technicians can baffle the alien probes, but not for long. We are facing extinction. Unless, we strike first! The United Kingdom stands directly beneath the belly of the mothership. I beg of the United Nations- pass an emergency resolution. Give us the access codes. A nuclear strike at the heart of the beast is our only chance of survival. Because... from this moment on, it is my solemn duty to inform you, planet Earth is at war."
"He's making it up!" The man insisted, frustrated. He began to pace. "There's no weapons up there, no threat. He just invented it!"
"Do you think they'll believe him?" Harriet asked, now she was a little more worried than she had been.
Rose retaliated. "You did last time."
"That's why the Slitheen went for spectacle." It was coming to him now, all making sense. "They want the whole world panicking cos you lot, you get scared, you lash out."
"They release the defence codes..." Rose froze.
"The Slitheen go nuclear." The Doctor wasted little time in running over to the door, and pressing the panel to remove all of the metal coverings.
Harriet didn't seem to understand. "But why?"
The steel opened to reveal the Slitheen, all in their natural green forms. And everything that he said was confident, because he knew what they were doing now. "You get the codes, release the missiles. But not into space- cos there's nothing there. You attack every other country on Earth. They retaliate, fight back." EJ felt ridiculous he hadn't thought of it before. "World War Three. Whole planet gets nuked."
The woman from before walked through the gaggle of green monsters, and made herself known. "And we can sit through it, safe in our little spaceship waiting in the Thames. Not crashed, just parked. Barely two minutes away."
"But you'll destroy the planet." Harriet reasoned to the best of her ability: she was holding strong. "This beautiful place. What for?"
"Profit." The Doctor spat. "That's got the signal is, beaming into space. An advert."
"Sale of the century! We reduce the Earth to molten slag, then sell it. Piece by piece. Radioactive chunks capable of powering every cut-price starliner and budget cargo ship. There's a recession out there, Doctor. People are buying cheap. This rock becomes raw fuel."
"At the cost of 5 billion lives." He retaliated.
"Huh." The woman laughed. "Bargain."
"I give you the choice." Said the Doctor, plainly. "Leave this planet, or I'll stop you."
She just laughed again, a sickening sort of laugh, as did her relations. "What? You?" She scoffed. "Trapped in your box?"
"Yes." He deadpanned with such sharpness it could cut. "Me."
They all cackled away at him as he pressed the button once again, all of the panels closing. That was the last time they would see the Slitheen that day.
It was well past sunrise now, they weren't much further forwards, though it was only a few hours difference. It was completely and utter rubbish, in EJ's opinion. All he wanted now was to talk to Angel. There was no window to receive any messages, never mind reply, and it played on his mind. He didn't want to be trapped in their forever.
Jackie had started to cave by this point, finally, h sing seem what the Doctor could do for them. He had been the one to save her, really, not Mickey, or Rose, or anyone else.
"Alright, Doctor." She stated, bluntly as ever. "I'm not saying I trust you, but there must be something you can do."
"If we could ferment the port, we could make acetic acid." Harriet suggested, meekly.
Rose called to the phone. "Mickey, any luck?"
He had been working on, just as the Doctor had told him to. "There's loads of emergency numbers. They're all on voicemail."
"Voicemail dooms us all." Harriet shook her head disapprovingly. She didn't seem like an advocate for the technical revolution.
The blonde girl sighed. "If we could just get out of here..."
"I'd be able to let people know I'm actually still alive, rather than being murdered by a hoard of green aliens from another planet." EJ deadpanned, hitting his fist against the glass table, lightly.
The Doctor had been leaning against a sealed off window pain for quite some time, and it came as a surprise to them all when he spoke. "There's a way out."
Confused, Rose replied. "What?"
"There's always been a way out." He reiterated.
EJ scoffed. "And you're only saying this now?"
"Then, why don't we use it?" Rose asked.
He ignored both of his younger compatriots, and spoke directly to the phone, and nowhere else. "Because I can't guarantee your daughter will be safe."
"Don't you dare!" Jackie exclaimed- she could be rather frightful at times, and EJ didn't even know her. "Whatever it is, don't you dare!"
"That's the thing." The Doctor said with distain. "If I don't dare, everyone dies."
"Do it." Rose replied with no hesitation.
His eyes were soft and sad as he looked up, meeting the gaze of his companion. "You don't even know what it is. You'd just let me?"
"Yeah."
They shared a long look, one which could have been easily misconstrued for love, or sexual tension, but it wasn't. It was a realisation of trust. It was the realisation that he wasn't really alone, because Rose was going to be there for him. And that alone was more frightening than any alien he had ever seen.
"Please, Doctor, please!" Jackie pleaded, desperately. "She's my daughter. She's just a kid."
"Do you think I don't know that?" Just as passionately, he replied. "Cos this is my life, Jackie. It's not fun, it's not smart, it's just standing up and making a decision. Because nobody else will."
Almost silently, EJ whispered. "That must be lonely." He'd never felt that way, and he never wanted to.
"What are you waiting for?" Rose queried, softly.
"I could save the world, but lose you."
"Except, it's not your decision, Doctor, it's mine." Harriet spoke up, and barged into the conversation, for not the first time, though she really did know what she was doing now.
"And who the hell are you?" Jackie spat.
"Harriet Jones, MP for Flydale North. The only elected representative in this room. Chosen by the people, for the people, and on behalf of the people, I command you." She gritted her teeth, but there was no regret. "Do it."
A mischievous grin spread across the Doctors face, soon mirrored by EJ. This was his element, though he knew nothing about it. All of this- it was him, through and through.
Rose, once again, asked the questions they all wanted to know the answers to. "How do we get out?"
Grabbing the Emergency Protocols file, he smirked a little. "We don't. We stay here. Use the buffalo password, it overrides everything."
"... hacking into the Royal Navy." Mickey hummed- it certainly wasn't usual. "We're in! Here it is, HMS Taurean Trafalgar Class submarine, ten miles off the coast of Plymouth."
"Right, we need to select a missile." The Doctor announced.
"We can't go nuclear." Mickey blanked. "We don't have the defence codes."
"We don't need it, just as ordinary missile. What's the first category?"
"Sub-harpoon, UGM-84A."
"That's the one!" He exclaimed. "Select! Ready for this?"
"Yeah."
"Mickey, the idiot," The Doctor sighed, without hesitating. "The world is in your hands... fire!"
They didn't hear the boy click the button, but assumed that he must have because of the silence that ensued. And, for a frightful minute, they all looked at one another, slightly lost on what to do with themselves.
"How solid are these?" Harriet asked, about the reinforcements on the windows and door.
"Not solid enough." The Doctor said, his mind racing as he thought it all over. "Built for short-range attack, nothing this big."
"Alright." Rose said, confidently. "Now I'm making a decision."
Pathetically, EJ pumped his fist. "Girl power!"
"I'm not gonna die." Rose ran to the cupboard, which incidentally had the dead bodies from earlier in, and started feeling around. "We're gonna ride this one out. It's like what they said about earthquakes, you can survive by standing under a doorframe. Now, the cupboards small, so it's strong. Come and help me. Come on!"
They ran to the cupboard, and took everything out that might have fallen onto them. The Doctor had stayed behind, at the table, talking. But it left EJ to drag out the bodies, reluctantly. He went as fast as he could, of course, but it was disgusting.
"It's on radar." They heard Mickey said. "Counter defence 556."
"Stop them intercepting it!" The Doctor replied, stressed as he hit the table.
"I'm doing it now!"
"Good boy."
"556 neutralised."
After that, he helped, and finished clearing everything out, giving them the chance to hide beneath a shelf, all holding onto eachother. It was all they had left, but EJ couldn't stop thinking.
This could be the end of his life. There was a missile heading for him, and he could die in seconds.
He'd never see his family again. He wouldn't see his brothers, nieces or nephews ever again. He wouldn't see Elliott, or Ty, or Angel... He couldn't do that. There had to be another way, he kept thinking, but he knew that there wasn't. This was it, and if it didn't go well, then there wouldn't be any of him left to see.
All of his faith was in a man he didn't know.
The Doctor had to be right.
"Here we go." Harriet said, with baited breath. "Well, it's been nice knowing you all."
"Yeah, yeah, same." EJ replied, absently. "Hey, uh, if anyone survives, and you know, I don't, please call Angel for me, yeah?"
There were sounds of agreement which gave him some comfort, as did the gesture to hold each others hands. Harriet grabbed his right, and the Doctor his left, as he edged himself into the corner.
"Hannibal." Harriet whispered, and it made EJ smile a little. He nodded, for solidarity.
And then it hit, without any warning, and it hurt more than he thought it would. They were shaken around, turned upside down, and thrown from place to place with no care for their limbs, and the limited space they had to protect themselves. Screams filled the air, most likely masked by the sheer force of the missile. Even despite them moving so many things out of the room, things clattered about, hitting them in any way they could.
It all happened so quickly that, for a moment, it might not have even happened at all. EJ reached up to touch his head, as it ached, and revealed a hand stained red. It wasn't too bad, and he supposed he had other wounds too, but nothing that couldn't be fixed by germaline and plasters.
The Doctor was the one to get up first, and take them out from the cupboard, making sure everyone was safe. He even checked EJ over, only briefly, but at least he knew that he cared. Then, he kicked down the wooden door of the Cabinet Office, and found that their entire surroundings were just rubble.
It was a little disconcerting to be standing after such turbulence, and he was dizzy. The Doctor had been holding him up, and now on uneven ground, he felt useless, not even being able to stand still. Rose offered him an arm, for the time being, until he found his bearings once more.
"Made in Britain." Harriet smiled, proudly, that they had come out in one piece.
EJ's phone began to buzz in his pocket, finally having signal, and it made him worry. Where they all alright now that he knew he was?
"Oh my God." One of the guards that had previously been inside of Downing Street ran over to them, filled with surprise. They hadn't expected any survivors. "Are you alright?"
"Harriet Jones, MP for Flydale North." She showed him her card to officiate. "I want you to contact the UN immediately. Tell the ambassadors the crisis is over, they can step down. Go on, tell the news!"
"Yes, Ma'am." He replied, and sprinted away without any further prompting.
"Someone's got a hell of a job sorting this lot out." Harriet sighed, before coming to a quick realisation that no one else had even considered. "Oh, Lord! We haven't got a Prime Minister!"
"Maybe you should have a go." The Doctor teased, but they could all tell that it was completely serious.
"Me!" She could hardly believe it. "I'm only a backbencher."
"I'd vote for ya." Rose agreed, cheerily.
"Now, don't be silly."
"I don't know if I'm registered." EJ mumbled, slightly embarrassed. "But I'll vote for you if I am. Honestly."
"Look," She shook away the responsibility. "I'd better go see if I can help." And then, to the great amount of soldiers and SWAT guards, she stumbled over. "Hang on!"
Leaving the wreckage, which was a little harder than they had all anticipated, the Doctor mused, as all of his thoughts finally came together. "I thought I knew the name." He smiled. "Harriet Jones. Future Prime Minister, elected for three successive terms. The architect of Britains Golden Age."
Watching Harriet Jones make her way down the street, calling for attention and answering the press, it wasn't hard to believe. She had everything under control, and she had been aware of herself the entire time they had been in the Cabinet Office. EJ had never been around someone as kind and composed as her.
Rose and the Doctor looked proud of themselves, and while the Thompson boy was too, he really did know what he wanted now. He looked around, and sighed to himself.
"I hate to sound like a broken record." EJ interrupted them, awkwardly rubbing his hands together. "But I need to go home."
"Oh, yeah, fine." The Doctor nodded, knowingly. "Go."
"It was nice meeting you both." He smiled. "Really."
"Yeah, you too." Rose smiled, sweetly.
EJ, though a very physical person, wasn't much of a hugger with people he didn't know. But he did look back, and grin at the Doctor, especially. "Thank you."
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if there are any songs that remind you of EJ or this book in general, please comment them here.
I'll add them to the playlist linked in the opening part.
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Disclaimer!!!
I do not own Doctor Who, it's characters and original storylines. The only things I do own are my own characters, my addition to the series and my own storylines. Any similarities to real life are purely coincidental.