Authors Note: Just wanted to let you all know what I'm still writing and I'm about 15 chapters ahead of here, with a projected 56 chapters in total, if there a times when I'm not updating frequently just know that I'm still writing and you will get to see the end of this story. Thank you all for reading and please leave comments etc. I love seeing what you have to say. Constructive criticism is welcomed.
"Tijuana!" Stella fumed at her children, her face bright red and worry lines showing on her face. She stood with one hand on her hip and one with white knuckles gripping the back of a chair. "Tijuana! What the hell were you thinking?"
Gracie bit her lip, "I'm sorry, it was my fault," she admitted, there was no point trying to come up with a lie now. "I made Marco take me there, don't blame him."
In hindsight, it was a bad idea and she knew it. She already blamed herself for deceiving her parents and using Marco, and now she blamed herself for being so stupid. She hadn't realized it at the time but she was looking for more than just a signature from Julia, she wanted an explanation because buried deep down there was a part of her that looking to understand her birth mother; how her life had gone the way it had, how she could leave her child. But she still didn't get it. She couldn't understand how a mother could put a child through what she went through, and she left the prison more confused than when she went in. More unanswered questions than ever before.
"Oh no, you're both to blame," Stella clenched her teeth and tried to calm herself down, but she was furious.
"Marco, we expected better from you," Lilah shook her head. She never got as outwardly angry as Stella but she was still mad and her disappointed glares could needle at you just as much as Stella's yelling, "You're supposed to be a big brother, you have a responsibility to take care of your younger siblings."
Marco and Gracie sat with their heads bowed as their mothers scolded them. Neither of them had realized that they would need passports to get back into the country. When they reached the border, they had to call their moms to come and pick them up. Stella hadn't stopped yelling since they got home.
"Well, go on then, what was so important that you needed to cross the border? And don't tell me you were shopping," Stella glared at her kids.
Gracie and Marco exchanged a glance, and Gracie swallowed the lump in her throat, "I went to see my birth mom," she braced herself for more yelling, but the room fell silent as Stella and Lilah sat down.
Stella's face returned to its normal color and she shook her head in disbelief.
"Marco, can you give us a moment with Gracie?" Lilah asked. As Marco made his way upstairs, she called out, "We'll discuss your punishment later."
"What were you thinking?" Stella spoke calmly but her voice was still raised, "Going there after we said we'd discuss it?" Stella and Lilah looked at Gracie, waiting for an explanation.
"I was thinking I want to get adopted," Gracie sighed, "I just wanted to get this part out of the way, I couldn't stand all of the waiting around."
"Oh, love," Stella sighed, finally lowering her voice, "I understand that it's been frustrating, but you don't know this woman."
"She could have been dangerous," Lilah added.
"There were guards all over the place, it was fine."
She wasn't just trying to justify her actions to her parents, she was trying to prove to herself that she wasn't being completely reckless, that she wasn't the burden she so often felt like, but she'd never felt more like a plague on their lives, especially now that she'd roped Marco into her antics.
"That's not the point Gracie, and you know it," Stella was getting angry again but Lilah took her hand and she calmed down immediately.
"I know, I'm sorry," Gracie was all out of tears and spoke matter-of-factly to her parents, "She signed the papers," Gracie revealed the document.
This was supposed to be the part where it didn't matter what she had gone through, it was supposed to be the moment when she and her mothers could breathe a sigh of relief knowing that Gracie could become a member of the Tucker family.
Lilah took the papers from Gracie and showed the signature to her wife, and they both gave small smiles, "Well," Lilah cleared her throat, "We're not condoning what you did to get this signed, and you'll be punished too, but, this is good news."
"Isn't it, love? This means we can adopt you," Stella could see that Gracie was still keeping something inside, "If that's still what you want."
"I do," Gracie reassured them that she still wanted to be a Tucker, though she didn't know why they still wanted her. "I want this family more than anything." But it wasn't up to her, it wasn't up to them anymore either.
Lilah came and sat next to her daughter and held her hand, "What is it, honey?"
She contemplated telling them what Marco had told her in the car, "It was just a long, weird day," she lied, "That's all."
They would find out eventually when a social worker came knocking on the door ordering Gracie to pack her bags. But for now, she didn't want to give them another thing to worry about, they were almost at their wit's end with her. Gracie was too, she was beginning to wonder how much longer she could keep fighting for a family that outside forces didn't want her to be a part of. One wrong move at the wrong time could blow everything up.
"So, are we grounded?" Gracie asked, wanting to get the punishment over with so she could go lie down.
"No, but you and Marco are on laundry duty for the next two weeks," Lilah said.
Gracie was sure she would be grounded, in fact, she was almost hoping she would be, that way she would have an excuse to crawl back into bed and stay there all weekend. Instead, she changed into more comfortable clothes and packed an overnight bag to take to Sarah's house.
"What did they say?" Marco came into Gracie's room and shut the door behind him, "About your birth Dad," he sat on Maia's bed.
Gracie sighed as she zipped up her backpack and avoided eye contact with her brother. "They didn't say anything because I didn't tell them," she said, "They'll find out soon enough, until then I just want to make the most of being here."
"Gracie, moms will fight for you, but you have to let them," Marco continued to surprise Gracie with his maturity. "I get it if you want to keep it from them for a day or two, but they deserve to know what's going on. Maybe they can get ahead of this."
"I know, okay? I get it," Gracie was frustrated, but Marco wasn't going to let this rest. "Fine, I'll tell them tomorrow after group therapy," she slung her backpack on her shoulder, "I've gotta go, Sarah's waiting for me. I'll get started on your chores tomorrow."
"It's fine, forget about the deal okay? We'll both do our fair share," Marco smiled.
"Thanks." She yelled goodbye to her mothers and walked outside to Sarah's car.
She was hoping to avoid the subject of her birth parents altogether for the weekend, but the second she got in the car, Sarah knew from the look on her face something was going on with Gracie. There was always something going on with Gracie.
"What happened?" She asked.
"What always happens when I finally get close to being happy," Gracie replied.
The girls sat up in Sophia's bedroom curled up in bed with some snacks while a movie played in the background,
"Aside from all of the birth parent drama, you'll be happy to know that Rachel and I broke up," Gracie said, stuffing a handful of popcorn into her mouth.
"Oh," Sarah touched her friend's hand, "Gracie, I'm sorry, that's not what I wanted," she did her best to comfort Gracie, who was crying a lot less than usual when something happened. "But hey, at least it's one less secret to keep, right?"
"Yeah, I guess," Gracie went quiet for a moment. "I'm sorry too, I wanted this weekend to be fun, but all I'm doing is bringing us down."
Sarah playfully swatted her friend, "Don't be stupid, G, I'm just glad we're finally hanging out outside of group therapy again."
"Me too," Gracie hugged her.
Sarah had some news of her own that she'd been wanting to share with Gracie. Over the last year, Sarah had been doing well in school and her mental health had improved by miles. Her parents were thinking about moving her to an even more elite private school. Sarah was in two minds about it, "The school is on the other side of the country, I'd never see you."
Gracie was thrilled for her friend, of course, but part of her was heartbroken at the thought of Sarah moving so far away, still, she did all she could to encourage her to make the right choice.
"I know, but it's an incredible opportunity, you still want to go to an Ivy League don't you?" Sarah nodded, "Then it should be a no-brainer, S. It's your future. Plus we text all the time anyway, and we can video call. And we still have an entire summer to hang out, right?"
After discussing what their fun-filled summer would entail, the girls both cheered up and spent the rest of the evening giggling and gossiping away. It had been so long since they'd hung out like that, and Gracie felt like she and Sarah's relationship was getting back to how it used to be, before all of the drama.
The next morning, the girls woke up late and had to rush to get ready for group therapy, "Are you going to talk about your birth parents today?" Sarah asked, "I mean, we had a fun night, but you haven't been yourself, maybe it would help to vent a little."
Gracie had thought about it already. "I'm not ready to share it with everyone yet, I mean I just don't want anyone else's opinions right now, I still don't know how to feel about it."
The truth was that Gracie didn't want everyone to see just how quickly her mental health had turned around since last week. She was good at masking the darkness she felt when she was with her family, but with Sarah and the other kids in the support group, it was different, they knew all the tricks and could see through her duplicity, plus there was always a part of her that wanted to talk about everything that was going on and if she started she wouldn't be able to stop, so she decided it would just be easier to stay silent this week.
Jasper was the first to raise his hand when Dr. Ellis asked who wanted to share. "Uh, so I talked to my social worker about everything," Jasper made eye contact with Gracie, "Like you said. So, I've moved back in with my dad, but she's also going to do daily visits for a little bit, just so we can like, talk or whatever. It's still weird being home again, but I think it's getting better. I just wanted to say thanks, to all of you really, but to Gracie mostly." Gracie blushed, she didn't want any extra attention. "I guess I just needed a push to, like, advocate for myself, so yeah," he shrugged, "Thanks."
The group looked at Gracie, waiting for a reply, "Yeah, no problem," she sank lower in her seat hoping it would somehow turn her invisible.
The room was silent for a moment before Sarah decided to speak up to take the unwanted attention away from her uncomfortable friend, "So, I have good news too," she smiled, "I'm going to a new school next year, it's pretty much my dream school." Now that she'd decided she was going, it was clear that Sarah was excited, "So, it means I won't have this group anymore, but I'm ready, you know? I feel strong."
Gracie looked at her best friend with such pride, Sarah had come a long way in the short time they'd known each other. And at that moment, she knew she wanted to be like Sarah. She wanted to put in the work to get better and claim the life she deserved. She wasn't going to let a stranger, even if he was her birth father, come between her and her family.
The second Gracie got home she went straight to the kitchen where her moms were getting ready to make dinner, "I need to talk to you guys," she said, not giving herself a chance to change her mind.
Stella and Lilah both sat down across the table from Gracie, "Okay, love, what is it?" Stella asked.
"I didn't exactly tell you guys the whole truth yesterday," she started, knowing full well that honesty was the only way forward, "After I sort of yelled at Julia, I left and Marco stayed behind for a second. When he came out he said that Julia had told my birth father about me last week when she found out I hadn't been adopted yet, and now he's started looking for me."
Both mothers were shocked, "Looking for you?" Lilah asked.
"She said he's going to try and get custody of me," Gracie hated having to tell her moms that they had yet another battle to fight, she wasn't worth their efforts.
Gracie sat quietly at the table, sipping Lilah's herbal tea and watching Stella frantically pace back and forth waiting for Anita to call back. Maybe she could find a way to keep their daughter from being taken.
"Look, I'm sure we're going to get this all straightened out, okay?" Lilah's words were optimistic but her worried expression said the opposite.
Stella's phone let out half a ring before she answered it with haste and put it on speakerphone.
"I got in touch with Gracie's father, Greg Yates," Anita said through the phone, "He wants to see Gracie as soon as possible."
"Why?" Gracie asked, "He doesn't know me, we've never met, why does he want anything to do with me?" It didn't make sense. The rest of Gracie's biological family wanted nothing to do with her, so why did he?
"He had no idea you existed until your mother-"
"Birth mother," Gracie interrupted, "Stella and Lilah are my moms."
Her parents smiled at her and gave each of her hands a squeeze, happy to see that Gracie was embracing them as her parents.
"Is that was she was happy to sign me away? Because she knew he could get custody?"
"Right, they both came to an agreement that because he has the means, if she couldn't raise you, he would."
"Hold on, what?" Gracie had assumed he was like Julia, a drug addict with a record. "The means? So he's like rich or something?"
"He's a fairly wealthy man."
For a split second Gracie imagined a life where she grew up in a big fancy house like Sarah's, would she still be as messed up as she is now? She'd be well-fed, well-educated, and never want for anything. She'd have one consistent home, her own bedroom, go to a fancy school, and have a life like Sarah's. But on the other hand, the money and the fancy schools never made a difference when Sarah was deep in the trenches of her depression. There was every chance that Gracie could have ended up worse off than she was now.
"Having money doesn't qualify someone to be a parent," Stella was still fuming.
"It's not as simple as that, the family courts will want Gracie to be with a biological parent, and if the judge deems him fit enough to take care of Gracie he will almost definitely be awarded custody."
The way Anita spoke made it sound like Gracie was an object to be passed around between people who might not have her best interest at heart. That's what she had been since she was eight years old, tossed from house to house until she moved in with the Tuckers, and even then it had taken something awful happening to get her placed with a family who cared.
"If you want to fight this, it's not going to be a walk in the park."
"I want to fight," Gracie said, "He's not my family."
"Gracie, there's something else you should know," Anita said, and this time Gracie wasn't going to storm out before she got all of the information, "He has a son, your half-brother."