Despite it being a little over a year after his death, Eddie's birthday still took a toll on me. Immediately after I realized the date I'd broken down in tears despite the fact I was scheduled to go bowling with James and Aleks.
That didn't matter though, only Eddie mattered.
In no time I'd drug out everything from the corner of my closet that had been left untouched for so long. When Aleks and James walked into my room they'd found me surrounded by Eddies belongings in hysterics.
Tears soaked my face, and sobs wracked my body as they both realized what was going on. They both jumped into action, particularly Aleks who encompassed me in his arms immediately holding me close to him. James soft voice could be heard but it was miles away, and indistinguishable over the ringing in my ears. A hand smooths down my hair eventually moving to cradle me into its owners chest while I endlessly sob.
Eddie was truly gone.
There wouldn't be anymore birthday parties.
No more mischievous smiles.
No more heavenly giggles.
There wasn't anymore Eddie..ever.
My fingers grip Aleks shirt twisting it around my fingers as he continues cooing soft words that never reach me. He doesn't stop though, he only continues to mummer soft words as James does who knows what. A warm hand rests on my back causing me to jerk away from its touch further into Aleks.
I cast a look back to see James through my teary eyes. The look on his face was one showing pity, and only made me feel worse. Two hands grasping the sides of my face, and making me look forward startle me, but when I meet Aleks gaze for some reason I feel more secure. He somehow suppresses the crashing waves inside me with one glance all to the point where only sniffles leave me.
"Jasey look at me.", he says softly.
Only then do I realize I've been avoiding eye contact with him, ashamed by my own actions. Aleks sighs deeply but holds me steadily waiting for me to look at him. Finally my muddled grey eyes meet his coffee ones that showed only concern.
"It's gonna be okay...Jasey were gonna be okay.", Aleks says.
His voice no longer confident, in fact it's shaking with each syllable cracking at the end with uncertainty. Looking at him I notice the trail of salty tears down his face, and the way his hair was tousled and tangled. My arms extend out to draw him close against me as I rest my head on his chest.
"We're gonna be okay Aleks.", I say trying to reassure him. Aleks' hand makes its way back to my hair, stroking it in a way that's comforting.
"Why don't we lay down and watch a movie, bowling can wait.", he says. I nod my head, and release my grip on Aleks while sniffling again. My eyes land on James who'd cleaned up most of the mess I'd made of Eddies things. He was cleaning up my mess.
"James..you don't need to do that.", I state taking the stack of photos he was holding.
I carefully place them back in the box they originally came from then hug him tightly. James arms slip around me providing a sense of security.
"Thank you though.", I whisper.
"It's nothing now come on.", James states. I follow him downstairs where Aleks is already laying down on the floor with a throw pillow tucked under his hair. I flop down unto the floor next to him, tugging at the pillow until there's space to rest my head.
"Thank you guys."
I owed them so much more but those were the only words that came out.
"It's nothing we'll always be here for you.", James says snatching up another pillow.
"Yeah best friend, we're here to support you.", Aleks states looking down at me. He adds a small wink, and I grin knowing why.
know that people support you; check
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a/n
ONE MORE CHAPTER