Jaleel
We sat at the table waiting for Nia and Lianna. I don't know why the Nigga Lik be trying Reese foreal because he don't fuck around foreal.
" what you think Li got on today? Prolly something hugging that fat ass butt she got." He laughed.
Reese didn't even look up at first.
" bro shut up . It's not in there for you." My brother , Mal said shaking his head laughing a little.
Everybody kinda laughed but Reese, he ain't find that shit funny at all. He put his phone down on the table.
" bro, I ain't even gonn hold you.. you cool as hell that's why I allow you in my house, but I will throw yo ass up outta here just that fast if you think you about to keep playing with me about Li. Like I let you live because you one of the guys, stop disrespecting though." Reese said
" ya'll just chill out. Be cool, it's the first day of school foreal." Trey said getting up grabbing his book bag, passing the blunt.
" Nah. Ya'll don't wanna tell him but imma say it. That's not your girl bro. Respectfully if it was, I would not be stepping on your toes but until she tell me to step off, I'm on her fine ass like white on rice." He said dapping Mal up.
Reese hit the blunt and passed it to me.
" but you know that's his though, without it being his official girl. Everybody know that bro. Come on don't do that." I said hitting the blunt.
" nah don't tell his ass nothing. When I fuck 'em up for playing with me, he gonn understand then." Reese said chuckling
" if that's you and it's stamped and all that wack shit you be spitting, why she be texting me?" Lik said pulling up the messages.
We all just looked so shocked.
" bet." Was all Reese said back.
The room got so quiet while we finished the blunt . Reese phone started ringing and it said " THE WIFER " which was Li calling him but he just let it ring and gathered his shit heading to the door. Then Nia called me.
" we outside. And make sure ya'll stank asses spray before ya'll try to get in the truck smelling like skunks" she yelled through the phone.
We walked to the car about to get in and then liana got out the drivers seat.
" leel can you please drive this big shit." Lianna said
I laughed and hugged her before I got in the drivers seat. Lianna is like my best friend foreal . I looked over at Nia and see just rolled her eyes and smiled. Yeah you already know wassup with that. Summer we kicked it, HARD .. but a couple days ago we almost had sex, but we didn't and we haven't really talked since so I don't know wassup with that, but I'll find out.
" you bugging if you think me and Amiya getting all the way in the 3rd row. We females, we don't need to be climbing nowhere. Ya'll the animals" li said laughing.
Jamal, trey, and Malik climbed all the way in the back. I could see Reese just staring at Li, like burning a hole in her face. She finally stopped and looked at him . Nia turned around staring at their interaction while I just watched the the rear view.
" climb ya ass in the back too and squeeze so the ladies can sit up here alone. And you tried to act like you didn't see me calling your phone to come outside. Ugly self . Li said pushing Reese a little.
" I'm not even in the mood to play with you foreal. So go head and stop touching me foreal." Reese said.
He got in the car and slammed the door in her face making her have to walk to the other side, putting Amiya in the middle . I could see her texting so I know she was texting Nia about what just happened . Just before I pulled off I seen " sister " pop up on her phone and I already knew that was Li . I shook my head and drove us to school.
When we got to school, the girls got out and walked in showing Amiya where to get her schedule from. Jamal, Lik , and trey headed inside to go put their stuff down and get settled. I pulled Reese back because I know he was mad and i know how he get . He'll be mad and just have a fucked up rest of the day and not give a fuck.
" bro, relax. You ain't have to slam the door on sis like that."
" bruh fuck outta here you always tryna defend her because that's ya bestie . Nigga you my boy first and at the end of everyday, BROTHA. Remember that? Stop always tryna defend her. What the fuck she doing texting Malik? Come on now she on some straight hoe shit. Tired of chasing her ass. For what at this point if she texting him and whoever tf else." He said balling his fist up.
" she ain't no hoe. Chill out. You know that and just like I defend her to you, I defend you to her. I be feeling like I'm ya'll therapist or some shit. Ya'll annoying as hell. I told you before the summer ended to have an establishing conversation with her. Did you?"
" Bruh I tried, twice at that and she just didn't want to talk about it. Like wtf I don't get it man" he said shaking his head.
" Okay and that's saying something, either she not interested, it's something with you, or something with her. Figure it out bro." I said honestly. It's not my place to tell him anything right now and it's not my place to tell her anything right now. Tired of being the one going back and forth telling them what the other said and what to do when they won't just come together and talk to each other. Shit is stupid.
" Bro you know what the fuck it is. I don't get it. I can't talk to her because she so nonchalant bro and I hate to yell at her but she make me so mad when I'm tryna express myself and be serious and she just act like I ain't talking to her or like she don't got emotions or something I don't know . She act just like killa foreal. I wish she was like Miss Mariah with that shìt. Bro she came over to my house mad times this summer and spent like the whole day with me and lied and said she was at Nia house and Nia would cover for her damn there about to get caught, just so she can stay the night with me just so I could hold her. Bruh you didn't see it, she showed a side she never shows, so vulnerable like I don't know what happened but something did. I felt fucked up for being happy about whatever bad happened because I got to spend so much time with her and see her in and out and now she texted Malik ? Nah. I'm tryna not wild on both of them Leel. I don't wanna hurt her feelings but imma have too foreal. She don't even be wanting to kiss me but let me be talking to another bitch, she on my ass. I don't fucking get it and I'm not about to keep playing these games with her." He vented .
I feel him. I understand where he coming from foreal . Lianna is like a closed book to a lot of people and she open and closes her book with Reese and I know that shìt frustrating to him. Nia used to be the same way with me but I don't know how to give him the right advice because Nia and Lianna are very different. Nia is like that if she doesn't know you but once she's comfortable she's open and loving and bubbly kinda. Lianna on the other hand, she just open when she wants to be and she just naturally standoffish.
" I don't know bro. Just do what's best for you. Ya'll know ya'll like each other so don't do nothing stupid." I said as we walked into school.
" Man I already did bro and I know she gonn hate me for it if she finds out. I just hope she don't." He said
" Bro don't even tell me foreal because if she even know I know or think I knew, she gonn be on my ass too and then Nia gonn be on Lianna side not talking to me too and that's just bad for me all together." I said as we laughed.
Just then I swear right after I said that, Nia and Lianna come up to us. Lianna ran up on Reese and I tried to get in the middle but she had already smacked him. I pushed Reese back because I know he a wild one and I ain't want him to do something stupid like hit her back and now he gotta deal with her father and her uncles , including my father, but to my surprise he just stood there unfazed like he already knew what was up which was crazy because she damned there smacked the skin off his face.
" Lianna... don't do this right here. Don't!" Nia said tryna pull her away.
" NAHHH . LETS FUCKING DO THIS RIGHT HERE , RIGHT FUCKING NOW. SINCE MF's WANNA KEEP SECRETS" she yelled looking at Me and the back at Reese.
" he didn't know nothing. So before you go tryna be mad at your bestie, don't . Because you gonn need him to vent. I know that so don't put him in the middle." He said ode calmly.
That just pissed Li off even more.
" oh bitch you wanna be calm? You wanna play games?" She yelled now making everybody stare.
" Lianna, don't call me a bitch because you wouldn't want me to call you one back. I'm tryna be so calm and respectful to you right now. We can really go outside or in this room right here and talk" he said calmly with his eyes closed tryna not get mad.
" Nigga fuck you!!! You wanna go talk by ourselves but you had a fucking 3 sum over the summer with two bitches that graduated at last years party that we went to TOGETHER & then you fucked Crystal? Somebody that's supposed to be my fucking friend? This why I don't trust niggas and especially why I don't trust bitches and mf's be so concern to why I only let Nia and Jaleel in. We spent how much fucking time together and you ain't mention that shit to me not fucking once. But I gotta walk into school on the first day when I'm tryna take my mom and dad advice and be more open and nicer to people and this the first thing I hear? You serious Mo?" Li said.
She like the only person that called him Mo. I had no idea that he was even fucking bitches. I don't know where or when he was doing that shit because like I was always there. The guys was always together . The whole gang was together actually so idk. And they did go to that party together. I'm sure it's a misunderstanding or something.
" You sure you wanna do this right here?" He said still so calmly.
" Right fucking here."
Nia pulled Lianna and Reese arm into the empty classroom.
" come on ya'll. Ya'll not about let the whole school know your business." Nia said
" Word. Talk to each other. That's what ya'll don't do and that's ya'll biggest issue." I said looking at them.
" The whole school know my business. Why they can't know hers,too? I mean I don't give a fuck if they know what I did because I don't give a fuck about none of them bitches.. you wanna be mad but won't kiss me or give me the time of the day foreal. You play with me and my feelings and I'm tired of it." Reese said
" WHAT BUSINESS DO I HAVE MO?" Lianna yelled in his face.
Of course he was now sitting down for her to be yelling in his face. He grabbed her finger & pushed it along with mushing her. Me and Nia know stepped in trying to avoid anything from really popping off. These two were nuts.
Niaaaaaaaa
" Guys stop it." I said holding Lianna back.
She doesn't wanna tell Reese how she really feels because she's been through a lot. She's seen a lot of stuff with my aunt and uncle and my mom and dad it affected her. It affected both of us. Only difference is I went to therapy , she didnt. Reese is her safe space and I for one thinks she loves him but she's scared. She can't deal with that type of hurt because it'll break her and I feel if he hurts her she wouldn't be able to forgive him because he's not family. I can tell her the right things to do but I can't make her do it.
" Stop fucking putting your fingers in my face! I'm all these bitches and mf's but ya hoe ass been texting Malik when you stay in my fucking face ? My boy though? Crystal wasn't even your fucking friend and I been told you that & you knew that but now you really know. And them bitches I fucked together, was a drunken night. You let it been known that you ain't my bitch, you don't belong to me, you not my girl, all that shit. And I be out here looking like a fucking dummy going this hard for you because I know how we are behind closed doors when it's just us two but I let you rock because you who you are to me . You can text Malik and do whatever tf it is that Lianna Brown chooses to do, but me having meaningless sex or even talking to a bitch, you on my heels like this? Make it fucking make sense!!! Because it fucking don't. I'm tired of this shit ! I ain't shit but I be that Nigga you need me to be, for you .. more for you than myself. You helped me become a better Nigga and I thought I helped you too."
" You could really ask why I'm mad about you having meaningless sex with a bitch that I was tryna let into our circle ? You so dumb. All the nights you held me this summer and I snuck to spend the night with you and we didn't even have sex.... I hate you Maurice" she spat so damn coldly it's like she spit in his face.
The look in his eyes got real dark.
" if you want to hate me, then fucking hate me. You better hate your fucking self too. But it's cool. I promise you it is because I hate ya fucking ass too bitch." He spat back the same way walking out.
Jaleel and I both grabbed him.
" ya'll stop. Because ya'll saying shit ya'll both don't mean" I said
" right let's not walk away like this. Ya'll don't hate each other. Ya'll don't and you both know it." Jaleel said and I shook my head in agreement .
" Nah . I meant that shìt . I hate that bitch." He said looking at us. " Bitch I hate you and wish I never met you." He said looking Li dead in her face."
She just stared at him.
" Yeah Mo? Like that? I'm a bitch" she said laughing .
I know Lianna , she was hurt but tryna act like she wasn't. It's Reese and she actually cares about him and they really have had deep talks that she's told me about. It's been times that she opens up to him about things she didn't go to therapy about and that's how she tells me how it made her feel . I don't care who she tells before me , as long as she's telling somebody and I'm glad it's Reese.
" hell yeah . I talked to you about my father that I don't even know how that was like growing up. Tired of you playing in my face." Reese said about to walk out.
Please don't say anything low Lianna . Please please please . I prayed to myself because I know she about to hit so low
" well at least I know my father and he actually loves me and never left me." She spat with a smirk.
Reese stopped and looked at her with what almost looked like tears but Reese ain't gonn ever let nobody see him cry
" Lianna you wrong." Jaleel said with sympathy for Reese.
" Lianna .. why would you say that if you know you care about this boy?" I said nudging her
" I don't give a fuck about him, just like his daddy didn't." She spat again.
I was so scared of what he was about to say back because Reese is a wild one and he do not give a fuck . Lianna crossed the line by far and I just knew he was about to too.
" Reese . Bro.. please just leave . Don't go any further that ya'll can't return." Jaleel said shaking his head tryna get Reese to leave the room.
" Please can ya'll just revisit this conversation after school or another time. Please" I begged
Reese looked at me and Jaleel.
" nah ya'll it's cool. Ain't shit else to be said ever again . I would never tell ya'll the shit she told me on confidence, balling out crying, yeah ya'll crying ... no matter how mad I was about her and another Nigga, especially one of my boys."
And with that he walked out.
" go make sure he's okay Leel." I said
Jaleel walked out.
I pushed Lianna Ass so hard she almost fell.
She pushed me back.
" don't fucking take his side Nia !" She shouted in my face.
" bitch you wrong. And every time somebody hurt your feelings you try to hurt their entire being . You had no right to bring his dad up . And why the fuck you ain't tell me you cried to him? Bitch you barely cry . You love that Nigga and you need to stop playing . You need to apologize to him. I don't wanna hear you don't apologize . You will to him. Because that's not just some Nigga , that's Reese. And to him you know you not these bitches & over the years we all knew him to be a dog but when he was a BOY . He's a man & a man you helped him become . And why tf are you still responding to Malik's ass ? Bitch you just wrong all across the boards and if I gotta fight you on this, I will & imma still love you . Stop being scared all the time if Reese!! It's Reese and he really care about you ." I yelled
" Nia I don't care about him." She said with tears in her eyes.
I calmed myself down a little because LiLi really doesn't really cry often. She holds it all in.
" I-
Before I knew it the bell rung and li broke down and started crying. I'm sure it was what she was feeling and the fact that we have home room with Reese.
I took out my purse and grabbed my facial wipes.
" yes you do care about him. Now come on sister. Stop crying." I said grabbing her hand, walking out to the hallway.
As soon as we walked in to sit down, we seen Reese sitting there with his hoodie on looked dead at Lianna.
" come on let's go sit down, Li" I said guiding her to our seats in the back corner
Maurice
That shit Lianna said really did hurt a Nigga. It wasn't even her saying she hate me that really hurt because she said that shit to me before, damn there every time I really piss her off. But her speaking on my that Nigga that's my father? That was low because I really only ever talked about that shit with her and killa when I was younger after he took me under his wing. I would never discuss the stuff she told me. About having all the love around her for years growing up and feeling alone and unseen. Nobody don't know but me and Nia that on Lianna's 15th birthday party we all found out that Miss Mariah had an affair and it almost broke up their family . That shit came out on her birthday and they ruined it for her and still never apologized or talk to her about it. Or how she almost got raped at a party the beginning of the summer . Or how she feels like she can't breathe sometimes and doesn't know why. Or how she hated literally after she cheated on killa even though she knew he cheated on her before she was born. You would never hear none of that shit come out my mouth.
I seen her and Nia walk in and everybody looked so shocked because you could tell she was crying . She dont cry. She is her daddy's daughter. So cold on the outside if you don't know them, shit even if you do. But this wasn't my first or second time seeing her cry, but it would be the last. I'm just gonna go about my business like I should been did years ago, but this summer she looked me in my eyes, with tears and told me I was her safe space and how she didn't have that with anybody else in her life, not even Nia and everybody know how much she love Nia. Her saying all that shit to me in my face like none of that happened, hurt. She been hurting me for years and I just took it. I mean I have fucked a lot of bitches over and played them, hurt them, all that but just never her. Now I feel like I should have and just took whatever came with that from her and her uncles. I can't be that Nigga to her no more when she don't even give a fuck about a Nigga. She stared at me as she walked past but I acted it as if I didn't even see her. She can't get nothing else from me and being that our families are so tied in, I ain't gonn even make this shit a big thing. Imma just keep to myself.
School was finally over with and we all went to Killa house for lunch. He always cooked for us when we came home from school on the first day. This Nigga went from gangsta to a loving dad, but don't ever get it misconstrued, that Nigga will forever be a gangsta. It's nice to see how close Killa and Lianna is though. Nobody really peeps foreal but Lianna don't even fuck with Miss Mariah like this still. Killa be telling her to not be like that but she just a daddies girl foreal.
" I see you got a fresh cut Nigga. Check you out looking fly." Killa said to me
We really do gotta dope ass relationship. I ain't gonn lie he really been like a father/big brother to me. No matter how old this Nigga killa get, he still a kid at heart foreal. That's why we all loved him but he was so wise and he always gave us advice about females and how to treat them. The girls had left with Miss Mariah, Miss Tamara, and my mother to go get their nails and shit done so it was just the guys. I had just came back in from smoking.
" You know I always stay fresh man." I said smiling dapping him up.
" sit down though . Let me talk to you ." He said .
" you aigh?" He asked me
I looked at Jaleel with a death stare.
" look bro. You know whatever we say to uncle Jay stays with uncle Jay no matter what." He pled.
" yeah bruh but that's his fucking daughter Nigga." I said through my teeth. " look I never touched Lianna in anyway like that. I wasn't tryna go behind your back or nothing like that. You always taught me to be a man and stand behind what I do and I wasn't tryna go behind your back" I explained
He taught me all street shit along with all the right things to do. He taught me the street shit so I can learn from the best if that was ever the route I chose to take but I didn't, and I didn't plan on it. Most importantly he taught me how to be a man, we guided each other actually. I helped him be a better role model and he helped me be a man. I never want him to think I'm tryna sneak and fuck with his daughter that he probably love more than anything.
" Imma just ask you this one question." He said standing up looking me dead in my face.
I molded my head, waiting for him to ask. I'm not gonna lie the way he was looking at me, I was a little scared because I don't know what the hell he gonna ask but I know imma tell him the truth.
" when we sat down and talked in the beginning of the summer. You know what conversation I'm talking about. When you said you slutted that girl at that party, that very same party my daughter went to, where you talking about my baby girl? I know you wasn't talking about my daughter like that to me. Couldnt have been because you know how disrespectful that shit would be. Was you talking about my daughter, lil Nigga?" He asked
" No. I was talking about her new friend Crystal." I told the truth .
" aigh. Did you ever fuck my daughter?" He asked me again.
" No." I answered again, truthfully.
" Aigh. Did you ever kiss her?" He asked
I looked over at Jaleel who looked like he was gonna shit his pants. I cleared my throat.
" Yes." I said looking him straight in eyes like a man.
" Hmm. Aigh . Okay. Respect , respect. Last question, did you ever want or try to fuck my daughter lil nigga?
" Jay . Come on now." I said
" Aigh . Aigh . Sit down nigga. Don't be kissing my daughter no more mother fucka. . Fuck wrong with you ." He said
Jaleel started laughing . I didn't. I ain't know if it even was safe to laugh foreal . Key done snuck up on me all quietly , scaring tf out me that I swung. He ducked and hit me a body shot. That shit hurt but I ate it .
" oh shit Killa . This Nigga tough, huh?" He said laughing . " but bitch don't be kissing my niece and shit no more. Shit yo ole hurt ass down"
I sat down on the couch and looked at killa.
" leel told me what she said. She just like her fucking mother with that hurtful shit. And we not gonn get into how you feel about your father because if you woulda want mf's to know you woulda made it known, but we talked about it so I really know. You can act as hard as you want, I know that shit hurt because it woulda hurt me too. I see Lianna as my baby girl that she is, but I'm not blind Nigga I know she a trip, just like her mother and it's like she such a real ass nigga just like me and she a female so it's crazy. I love that for my baby that I know she'll be able to stand up and survive in this world as a female because she got that part of me in her and the rest is her mother, but to date, that can be tough. It's crazy watching Lianna and Nia grow up . They really just like Pooch and Tamara was, but so different at the same time."
" Word up they really are but Li so damn cold just like you killa that shit crazy. Fuck her over or hurt her it's like you dead to her just like her punk ass father." keyon said making all three of us laugh.
" shut the fuck up nigga." Killa said laughing . " but nah foreal though. It's sad to say, I don't want my baby girl to ever date, but I know she got to & if she do, I would feel better knowing it was with you to be honest. Imma tell you something from a father's point of view and then imma tell you something from a man's point of view. First off as her father, imma say this she seen a lot of shit that I just wish she had never because it fucked my baby up in a lot of ways that's gonna stick with me forever because regardless of what happened it was my fault. Pooch cheating was my fault and that's just that, nothing else to be said . I don't want her to be blamed for non of that . All the guns and violence and the cops busting in my house years after I got out the game was on me, I created that. I fucked my baby up . But my baby girl is scarred and scared . Don't nobody love her like I do because I clung on to her so tight and that's why we have the relationship we have because I felt guilty and I needed to everything I could as a man and as a father to protect her and fix her but I didn't. She just thinks I did and gives me credit for some shit she did herself. Me and you Reese got a lot of similar ways that's why she like you whether she say she does or not . I probably know you better than you know yourself . She didn't mean the stuff she said . That don't mean that shit don't hurt still. She just broken from shit me and her mother put her through. And it's even more fucked up because she forgave me so easily but still didn't even forgive her mother & I don't know if it's because she just love me that much or because she just didn't expect that much of me but that's my own shit and another story. She didn't mean it, she's just delicate and that's my daughter and I don't give a fuck what she do or say you better not hurt her ever. Now as a man ? Stand your ground my nigga . You don't gotta take that shit from nobody . You know your struggles and the struggles life puts on black boys becoming men, its hard as hell & when we find a female , like THE female we love that mf and hold them tight, but still not knowing how to properly do that or what to do for them we just know who we are and let the lead. Now like I just told you , Lianna is broken and she may not know how to lead, she just knows what's in her heart and who she lets in.. and you are one of those few people . I don't want you to be fucked up about this and then push her away and regret it because that's damn sure what I woulda did at your age. What she said or how she acted has nothing to do with you as a man so don't go off to the left. Stay straight and going forward and what happens happens. If I know you enough, you not gonna forgive her for that shit right now , true?" He finished.
" I'm not. And I don't know if ever can. That's shit woulda been water under the bridge with anybody else, but not her. I fuck bitches , a lot and ya'll all here know that . But I never disrespected Li like I have done females . I don't do that anymore because that's little boy shit but I'm saying that to at I was never this type of person to or with anybody like Lianna and she just keep constantly playing me. I claim her as mine and she just disses me to the whole world . It was fun and games when we was a little younger but it ain't funny no more. A Nigga really got so much feelings for that girl I can't even begin to tell ya'll foreal. I can't be the person she wants one minute and the next she don't want me or texting my homeboy that by the way she kissed and not just a peck. She did tell me the though. But she said it was a mistake but still.. so yeah out of spite I did go and fuck crystal . I would never fuck Nia or try to because thats too low and that's Leel little shawty . I'm just done playing games with her foreal. She go too far every time and this was way too far." I said
" wait she kissed Malik?" Jaleel asked.
" Yeah bro." I sighed
" yeah I gotta talk to sis because she definitely holding out. Both of ya stupid asses is." Jaleel said
" don't call my daughter stupid Nigga. Nephew or not I'll fuck you up over my princess." Killa said
" wait. So when was ya'll gonn tell me or you rather that you fucking with my daughter ? Silence said making everybody start laughing .
" Niggas I ain't fucking laughing!!!!" He yelled
" Nigga you knew just like we all knew . Shut up " killa said laughing . " but nah foreal talk to my baby I don't want he looking all sad like that."
" nah , I can't do that for you Jay. Anything else you woulda had it, you know that." I said honestly .
And with that, all the ladies walked in with their nails done and groceries.
" Jay I'm about to cook tonight. You want chicken or meatloaf? Miss Mariah asked her husband.
" I really wanna eat you but I'll take the meatloaf for now." He said getting up kissing her and grabbing her butt.
" EEWWWKK. Get a room" Li said
Everybody just laughed and the girls went into the kitchen but not Lianna . She stopped and looked at me.
" you gonn keep staring at the Nigga or talk to him." Key said
" I gotta go anyways. Gotta pick up some stuff for my moms from the store." I said
" man stop being like like that Nigga." Killa said
" are you coming back over after aunty cook?" Jaleel asked me
" nah prolly not." I said grabbing my keys.
" come on just stay." Miss Mariah said coming out the kitchen.
" maybe some other time ya'll. I'll see ya'll later. Love ya'll & be safe"
" Are you sure?" Miss Tamara said putting on her apron.
" ya'll he said he leaving so let him . I don't care." Lianna said .
I just looked at her and headed for the door.
" Girl . What did I tell you? Stop and go talk to him ." Nia tried to whisper.
" No. I don't care about him and if he mad." Lianna said.
I walked outside about to get into my car and before I got in and I seen Lianna stand there with this sad look in her eyes as she stood on the porch, watching me . I quickly looked away and got in my car and backed out of her driveway. This fucking girl man ....