After the walk with my grandfather, I decided that since I didn't die in the garden, I'll go shopping with my mother.
Perhaps my past dreams were crawling to the surface. After years of watching my mother take my siblings out to the shops, buying out stores and coming back with different toys and clothes and treats. It was a lot for my little heart to take, watching from a far window in the west wing.
"Hello Lady Jenova," I greeted, giving her my best curtesy. Today Rebecca dawned me in a light red, not quite pink, dress with red ribbons in my hair and a white mask that was tied by another red ribbon around my head.
"Oh just call me mo-" she cut herself off, staring at me with saddened eyes, "Call me Jenova, enough with the 'Lady' or 'Miss.'"
Holding back the urge to frown and grimace, I gave her my best polite smile and I nodded. Waiting for her to get into the carriage that was going to bring us into the more noble side of the city. I've never been, but I've seen plenty of carriages go over to that part of town.
If felt like ages but we stood there like statues, waiting for one or the other to get on the carriage.
My mother's personal maid and Rebecca stood awkwardly on the sidelines, giving each other brief glances in confusion.
"Uh my lady," Rebecca stepped up, tapping my arm lightly and pointing in the carriage, "Young children get on the carriage first, your bench is there," she pointed, and held out her hand to help me in, making sure I was comfortable before backing up and letting Jenova enter.
"Thank you, uh-" She paused, looking to Rebecca to get her name.
"That's Rebecca," I spoke up, "My personal.... maid?"
I didn't really know else to describe her. My nanny? My maid? My best and only friend?
"Well, thank you Rebecca," Jenova nodded, getting on the bench across from me and giving me a bright smile, "I've arranged the boutique to give us a private dressing secession. A lady like you needs to have new dresses every season."
I remained silent, smiling and nodded until it felt like my head was going to fall off.
"We could get new jewelry and new shoes and new accessories oh and new -" she kept going on and on and on I thought she would lose her breath but she went on like that until the carriage stopped. "Oh we're here!"
I felt like I was running on autopilot again. Just following Jenova into the store and being thrown into some sort of circular platform and a large measuring tape and being wrapping all around me.
"Oh you are so thin," a lady with large glasses commented, "Perfect!"
"You'll look so beautiful in blue," another woman commented, going for my head. "Oh we're going to have to move this."
I didn't even have time to react before the ribbon behind my head and the mask was gone. A gasp emanated from one of the seamstresses and the one who took my mask dropped it to the floor.
Everyone stood there, silent, staring.
I didn't know what to do, but I felt like my stomach was twisting around my lungs. But I found myself couching down and putting my mask back on my face, making sure it lined up perfectly. I could feel Rebecca's presence come behind me and tie the ribbon back in place.
But looking around the room, I could see the shock and discomfort on every single one of their faces until I saw my own mother.
I couldn't really tell what expression was. Sadness? Anger? Regret?
Disappointment.
Feeling tears threaten to fall, I cleared my throat, "Please excuse me."
I turned, running as fast as my little legs would take me, out of that store and down the street.
I felt the tears rolled down my cheeks in waves. I couldn't see anything. I couldn't hear anything. I couldn't feel anything.
I just wanted to get out of there.
I could just see my mother's face.
I don't even know when I ended up at the lakeside in the capital park. But I sat there, sitting right in the edge of the water, feeling it soak into my dress and my shoes.
"Lara?"
I lifted my head, looking to the last person I thought I'd see here.
"Harken?"
"Hey, mind if I sit?" He pointed, not caring that he was in rather fancy clothes. Dressed in a dark red suit with golden embroidery. A sword was still prominently on his belt.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, last I checked he was just a knight. Though I don't care much for status, it was strange him being here. Exactly where I was.
"Well my father has business with some noblemen," he shrugged, not going into much detail, "And I thought I sensed you here and snuck out."
"Oh," I muttered, going back to look at the water.
"You look really nice," he suddenly said after a second or two of silence, "Red looks good on you."
"Thanks," I mumbled under my breath. Red was the color of all fire users and a staple in a Fortunith wardrobe. Rebecca thought it was appropriate for me to wear it. Though nothing compares to the family insignia ring I wear around my neck.
Clearing his throat, it's clear that he wanted to ask what was wrong, but kept his mouth shut.
"The capital sucks," he chuckled, "So many pricks wearing layers of riches they don't understand the worth of."
I chuckled humorlessly, appreciating the comments he was making.
"I think we're gonna get another mission up north," he went on, splashing around the water in his dress shoes. He was sat in the water like me, not caring that his drawers would certainly be soaking wet, "At least up there the people don't have sticks up their asses."
That I laughed at, picturing someone like my father with a literal stick up his butt.
His smile got wider, "And we'll be close to my home, so you'll be staying at our castle. I could show you our stables! And our gardens. God they are filled with the best kinds of flowers."
"Best kinds?" I questioned.
"The type that can survive the winter hardships and look absolutely beautiful," he was looking at me in a strange way. A really strange way that made my chest hurt.
But in a good way.
"It sounds beautiful," I sniffled, feeling my mood lift significantly.
"You are," he paused for just a second, only to suddenly sit up and throw his hands up defensively, "I mean they are! You look fine! I mean, you look adorable but in like a good way. I mean that in not a creepy way but like a friend-way, because w-"
I couldn't help myself but to laugh out loud. But in an effort to hold it in, my laugh came out in like a bird-like squawk that I immediately slapped my hand over my mouth, staring at a wide-eyed Harken with a pair of widened eyes of my own.
But in a few seconds we burst out laughing together, enough for us to both roll backwards into the shallow water, my hair and his getting soaked in the process.
We laughed until my chest hurt, and I took several deep breaths before I could look him in the eyes, noticing he stopped laughed a few seconds ago, just watching me with a distant look on his face.
What's with these people, always looking at me with such strange looks.
Then I remember what Tallow said, about those who remember a past life. Perhaps all these strange things happening in my life were due to these memories.
"Well I'm soaked!" Harken suddenly shot up, snapping me out of my thoughts.
"Don't worry," I stood up, stepping out of the water and shook my hands out, shedding all the water back into the lake, "Here let me," flicking my fingers at him, the water flew right off his clothes, and he stepped out with just wet shoes that I fixed right away.
"Thanks," Harken smiled, noticing something in the distance, "Oh looks like my dad found me, I have to go."
Turning to where he was looking, I could see Parter in the distance, looking around for his son. He locked eyes with me, giving me a quick smile before waving.
Waving back, I appreciated that he didn't try to approach me. I wasn't really in the mood to interact with adults. He seemed busy either way.
"See you soon," Harken suddenly leaned down, giving me a big hug, and I didn't really know how to react.
Only to hug him back awkwardly.
"Yeah, see you soon."