*Luke's POV*
After the game, every bone in my body was aching like hell. But, I had given it my all, and we had won. This may sound dumb, but winning that game made me feel like I had gotten back to where I was at the beginning of the year - in the Pre Calum era.
I pulled the red, and white helmet off my head, as my wet hair stuck to my forehead. I walked into the locker room, as Ashton ran up to me giving me the biggest hug ever.
"We did it!" He grinned widely. "We kicked ass!"
"I know right," I smiled brightly, as I opened my locker. "The Washington Heights Warriors never fail!"
We both laughed in victory, as Ashton sat down next to me, as he unlaced his cleats. He looked up at me. "So, do you need a ride to Madison's?"
I paused for a minute. I didn't want to go to that party. If I had it my way, instead of Tyler's, I would just go driving all night in my camaro with the music full blast. I pulled my towel out of my locker, I wanted to shower here, so no one saw my cuts. "Um..I.."
"Luke, is everything alright?" Ashton asked me in concern.
I faked a smile, knowing I couldn't tell Ashton the truth about what Tyler was doing to me. "Yeah, just tired," I said, which wasn't a lie. "A ride would be nice, yeah."
"Okay, I'm gonna have to stop at my house on the way. I'd rather shower there," He admits. "I'll wait in the parking lot." He tells me as he slips on his sneakers, grabbing his gym bag.
I headed to the showers, as I set my towel on the rack outside. I stepped out of my uniform, stepping under the warm water. Everyone else must have made that same decision as Ashton to shower at home, because the locker room sounded completely empty.
I stepped out of the shower a few minutes later, as I dried my hair, and wrapped the towel around my waist. I picked up my clothes from the ground, as I walked back to my locker.
I began to open my locker, but jumped back. I heard a bang on one of the lockers a few rows down. Was someone still here?
"Hello?" I called out. "Tyler, if that's you, cut it out. I'm already going along with what you want." I say with anger in my voice.
To say the least - it wasn't Tyler. A tall, blond boy stepped out smiling sheepishly at me. I recognized him. The boy from the party. The boy from the lobby this morning. Ezra.
"How did you get in here?" I demanded in shock. It wasn't just the fact that he'd scared the crap out of me - I was done with Calum and his drama.
"I snuck in after the game. Listen, Luke," He began, as he walked towards me slowly.
"No," I shook my head. "Tell Calum I'm done with his mind games. Tell him to take a hint, and leave me alone."
"Just here me out, please," Ezra begged of me. I was tired of cutting Calum slack, but something inside was telling me to let Ezra speak.
I paused, pursing my lips. "5 minutes. Then get out," I say harshly.
"I've known Calum for pretty much as long as I can remember," He says as his stormy gray eyes meet my blue ones. "And, for him, he's always been so fucked up inside, that he's been living in this shell. He sleeps around, and breaks hearts, and never gives it a second thought. But, then you came along...and I don't know what it is about you, but I can see this side of him that I didn't think existed anymore. His eyes light up whenever he sees you, and he gets this smile on his face whenever he sees you, and...something about you is changing him."
I stayed silent. There is a point I had reached where words couldn't take the place of all the confusion, and heartbreak I was feeling.
"But, now..he's cold again. You did nothing wrong, but his heart is still broken. And..." His voice trailed on.
"Let me guess: you two slept together?" I said coldly, as I eyed him.
He fell silent. I knew it.
I turned towards my locker, pulling out my new change of clothes, and my gym bag. I opened my back, as I angrily began stuffing my uniform into the bag. "I'm not going to say I don't care, because I do. But, it's out of my control."
"I.."
"Just get out," I growled at him. "And tell Calum to stop sending his sluts to do his work."
I couldn't believe what I was saying. Spiteful words just poured out of my mouth. I couldn't control it.
"I came here alone. I'm being a good friend," He said in annoyance.
I laughed bitterly. "Not you're not. You're not doing this for Calum, you're doing this for you, because you feel guilty."
"That's not true!" He said in protest. His eyes fell on me, as something was distracting him. He came towards me, as he grabbed my arms. "Did you.." He began in confusion.
Shit. My cuts. I had forgotten. I yanked my arm away, as I could feel myself on the verge of tears. "That's non of your business."
"Luke, please. Just-"
"No," I said darkly. "Get out now, or I'll make you."
Ezra sighed as he made his way out the door to the football field. I collapsed on to the bench next to the lockers, as I felt hot tears slip out from my eyes. I knew that I couldn't just sit here, and keep Ash waiting.
I studied the clothes I had grabbed in my hand: a white Beatles shirt with short sleeves (I hadn't thought a head), gray skinny jeans, and my red letter man jacket. I slipped all of it on, along with my black vans. I grabbed my gym back, as I made my way out to Ashton's car.
"Ready?" He asked me smiling, as he opened the car doors.
"Yeah," I lied. I had a bad feeling about tonight, and it had only just begun.
****
I laid back on Ezra's bed, as I looked out the open window. I could see the sun fading in the distance. I felt emotionless, the way I had been before. Maybe I was better this way. I had gotten really good at being coldhearted and alone.
I sat up staring at my phone. I scrolled through my contacts until I stopped at his name. Lucas. I didn't realize that I had called him until it was too late. It went straight to voicemail.
Hey, it's Luke. I'm either busy or I'm trying to ignore you. Wait for the beeeeeeeeep.
I could hear his laugh through the phone. I listened for the beep, I stayed silent for a second unsure of what to say.
"Hey..it's me. You've probably deleted my number, you've made it pretty clear you don't want to talk to me.." I said letting my voice drag on. "God, I'm not even sure why I'm calling you. I know this is pointless, and that you'll probably delete this without even listening. But, maybe this is for the version of you - the part of you that is curious, and forgiving. I know what I did was shitty, and that's not because I made a mistake. It's because I'm a shitty person. You were right, you know. I am selfish, I do only care about myself. But if I didn't, let's be honest, who would?.." I paused, breathing deeply as I tugged gently at the covers. "I'm not saying all of this for pity, or for forgiveness...I'm saying it because I thought you deserved an explanation, but you're smart enough to figure me out on you're own, Clark. I know we can never be friends, but I'm willing to tolerate you, if you tolerate me. We'll just be acquaintances, and I won't bug you, or pretend I know you or anything. Like you said, you don't owe me anything."
I hung up. I knew I had said too much already. I threw my phone across the room, as it landed in a chair that Ezra kept in the corner. I reached over to the bed side table, grabbing a pack of Camel cigarettes. I lit one up, as I let the smoke fill the room.
I think I'd figured up why Luke intrigued me so much. He scared me. Not the kind of fear that people had always associated me with. He scared me because he was too real. He was too smart for my tricks, and he could figure me out. He scared me because I knew if I went the distance, he'd break my heart before I could break his. And that scared me.
"I'm home," A voice called from upstairs.
Maya came down the stairs, as she spotted me. "Where's Ezra?"
"He took off," I replied.
"What?"
"He. Took. Off." I said slowly. I turned towards her. "Do you need it in morse code?"
"I heard you the first time," She replies. "I just got a call. I need to talk to him."
"He knows about your dad," I tell her. "He got the call first."
Maya sat down on the edge of the bed. She pulled the cigarette from my lips, taking a drag. She handed it back to me sighing. "He must be pissed."
"He was," I informed her, as I took a drag. "I'm sure he's just out blowing off some steam."
Maya laid down next to me, as we stared up at the ceiling in silence. She leaned her head on my shoulder, as she breathed deeply. "Calum, I really need to disappear. I can't stand this anymore. This small town, this life that Ezra and I have. We deserve better. We are much too young to be so screwed."
"Being a mess doesn't have age." I told her. "And trust me, the wheels of changes are already in motion."
"I hope so," She replies as she tickles my cheek with the end of her hair. "I'm so bored of my story. I want a plot twist."
"It's all up to the author," I say turning towards her. "Make a plot twist."
She chews her lip gently. "I have something in mind."
"Go for it," I tell her smiling.
"You're right, I should be in charge of my life," Maya smiled, as she kicked off her heels.
Our conversation was interrupted by the sound of my phone buzzing. "I'll be right back," I told Maya, as I stood up, grabbing my phone from off the chair.
"Hello," I said softly as I walked out into the hallway.
"Hey Calum," A cheerful voice called through the phone. "It's Carter."
Carter was a friend of mine I'd met in Science. He had actually talked to me on my first day, when everyone else ignored me. He was pretty much the only friend I'd made at Washington Heights. I'm not really a social butterfly.
"Hey dude, what's up?" I smiled.
"I was just wondering if you're coming to Madison Parker's party tonight." He said. I paused. I knew who Madison was - how could I not? She was pretty much famous at Washington Heights. But, I'd never spoken to her in person. And, I doubted that this party would be my scene.
But, on the other hand, I could really use a night out.
"Sure, why not?" I replied, as I leaned against the wall. "Can you text me the directions?"
"Yeah, sure. I'll see you there."
I hung up after we'd said our goodbyes, heading back into Ezra's room. Maya sat up looking at me. "Who was that?" I could see the hopefulness in her eyes that it was Ezra. I hated letting her down.
"It was a friend of mine. He invited me out to a party," I informed her.
Maya smiled, as she stood up. "That's great. But.."
"But what?"
She smirked. "You are not going dressed like that."
I looked down at my clothes, shrugging. "What's wrong with this?"
"Oh my god, you are so lucky you have me," She laughs as she drags me over to Ezra's closet. She pushed her way through the hangers. "You know, for a gay guy, you really know nothing about fashion."
"For a straight girl, you really are into stereotyping," I shot back, laughing.
Maya smiled, sticking her tongue out at me. From the closet, she pulled out a black tank top, black skinny jeans, and an old flannel shirt. She smiled as she held it up for me. "Perfect," She threw the outfit at me. "Now try it on."
I laughed, as I caught it. "Okay, okay," I said walking to the bathroom. Even though Maya could annoy me with her motherly-ness sometimes, I don't know what I would do without her.
I put on the outfit, walking back into Ezra's room, as I sarcastically spun around for her. She gasped smiling. "One more touch," She said softly as she walked forward, messing up my hair. "There."
She pulled me over to the mirror that hung from the door, as I looked at me reflection. I had to admit, Maya had made me look better than I felt. I smiled turning towards her. "Okay, if you're done playing project runway, I should be going."
Maya laughed at my comment, as she hugged me tightly. "I hope you have a good time tonight. You deserved to have some fun."
I smiled, as I grabbed my phone, cigarettes, lighter, and car keys off the bed side table. "Thanks," I smiled. "You know, you do too."
I headed up stairs, as I slipped on my converses, heading out the door to my old, beat up truck. I had a really good feeling about tonight - a feeling I hadn't felt in a long time.
I had hope.