February 5 - 1532 hours - Natasha's room - Stark Tower
Clint settled Natasha on the bed before telling her and Coulson he would be back in a bit. Natasha turned to face Coulson once the door closed behind him. "He's mad at me for not telling him the truth isn't he?" Natasha asked.
Coulson nodded slightly, "But it's more than that too. He's much more angry that the Red Room would do those sorts of things to an eight year old. I think he's also angry that he couldn't be there to protect you in Russia. That you have to go through this procedure again. That pain. That he can't physically help you with or prevent."
"Of course he blames himself," Natasha groaned throwing her head back onto the pillows. "And there's not much I can do about it. I've already told him it's not his fault and that there's nothing he could have done." She paused and changed the topic not knowing how to deal with the idea of Clint blaming himself for something he couldn't have helped. "Phil, you're like family to me and I want you to know that I'm grateful for everything you've done especially when Clint first brought me in. I know we didn't get along but I want you to know that I didn't really hate you, if that's what it seemed like. I didn't know if I could trust you. You proved to me very quickly that I could and I really appreciated that when no-one else was very friendly. So thank you for everything." She paused not knowing how to phrase her her request. "I know you will anyway, but please if I don't make it, keep an eye out for Clint. He... he told me that he loves me Phil. I didn't know what to say," she admitted.
"He told me that he told you," Phil smiled. "If you love him back you should tell him so." Phil paused. "He was so scared you would tell him love is for children or run away from him or something." He shifted forwards in his chair. "Nat, the two of you are like family to me too. I would love to see the two of you happy together but I don't want either of you to get hurt."
"I don't really know what love is, Phil," Natasha whispered. "I was so afraid that I would hurt him by saying the wrong thing. I thought he would hate me for not saying it back."
"You obviously didn't say anything wrong, Nat." Phil assured her, "He would have left without saying goodbye if you had. He would have taken it as you not wanting him around. He's still here so you're fine." Phil knew from bitter experience how true his words were. "As for love. If you think you couldn't live without him in your life. If you miss him when he's not around. If he makes you laugh and makes you happy. If you hate to fight with him. If he frustrates you all the time but you still tolerate him. If every little thing reminds you of him. Or if he's the first person you think about then you probably love him." He paused, "I'd say it's a little different for everyone."
"Phil, thank you," Natasha smiled at him before shyly gesturing for him to come closer for a hug. "Whatever happens, just thank you."
"No problem, Nat," he smiled hugging her tight. "Thank you for coming into and changing my life. Thank you for making Clint happy."
There was a light knock on the door signalling Clint had come back. "Phil, if something happens give these out at my funeral." Natasha whispered sadly handing him a small pile of envelopes.
"Will do," Phil smiled sadly back at her tucking them out of sight before going to open the door. He quietly left the room closing it after himself before Clint could enter. Natasha briefly wondered what they were talking about in the hallway as she shuffled herself into a more upright position.
"Clint, what did you want to see me about earlier?" Phil asked shutting the door to Natasha's room. Clint looked confused. "In the kitchen this morning just as I left." Phil explained.
"Oh, I was going to tell you about the side effects and what she could be hiding." Clint replied, "She's still hiding something."
"I've noticed," Phil nodded. "Don't push her too hard. She'll tell you if you need to know."
"Thanks Phil."
"I'm going to head back down to the lab and speak to Tony, Bruce and Steve," Phil told him. "I'll let you know when we're on our way up with the serum."
Clint nodded opening the door as Phil headed down the hall.
"How are you feeling Tasha?" Clint asked coming over to sit next to her.
"No better," She answered honestly.
"Natasha, are you sure you want to do this?" Clint asked betraying the seriousness of his question by using her first name.
"Clint, without it I probably don't have more than 24 hours to live. If I don't do it now then I may not have the strength left to make it through the procedure." Natasha told him.
"I just don't want to lose you," Clint admitted.
"I'm not going anywhere if I have any choice in the matter," Natasha assured him.
"Tasha, я люблю тебя," (I love you.) Clint reminded her. "I'm not going to leave your side until the procedure is over." Clint promised. "Promise me you will tell me if there is anything I can do for you. Anything at all."
"You've already promised me you'll do the only thing I would ask for," Natasha smiled at him. "Just stay by my side. And if for some reason I wake up and try to kill anyone, please just kill me."
"Tasha, please don't ask that of me," Clint begged. "I can't do it, I won't."
"Clint, I know it would be hard but please it would be for the best," Natasha told him. They lapsed into silence as Clint tried to process what she had just asked of him, his head in his hands.
Finally a phone beeped breaking the silence. "That will be Phil saying they're on their way up," Clint muttered his face still hidden.
"Clint, Why did you make the different call?" Natasha asked suddenly. "What did you see in me?"
"You were lost and broken, the same way I was when Phil brought me in. I wanted to pay the favour forward." Clint told her, "But there was something else too. Under all that brokenness was a small spark of life though you tried to hide it. Maybe it was hope that me sparing you would mean you could finally be free to wipe out your ledger. I couldn't bring myself to wipe out that spark and when you threw yourself in front of those kids to protect them from the gang fight, I knew I'd made the right call."
"Thank you," Natasha whispered. "Thank you for everything. Especially for giving me the chance to wipe out my ledger." There was a light knock on the door.
"You deserved it Tasha," Clint replied. "Don't leave me though please."
"I won't, Clint. I can't really promise but I will try not to," Natasha replied. Clint nodded standing up to open the door. "Wait." Clint turned back to her. Natasha pulled herself more upright carefully taking his arm to pull him closer. She reached up to pull him into a hug.
He returned it before whispering, " Я люблю тебя, мой огненный паук." (I love you, my fiery spider)
"Я тоже тебя люблю,мой ястреб." (I love you too, my hawk) She whispered very quietly back. She kissed him on the cheek before pulling away slightly as there was another knock on the door. Clint's face had lit up in a wide smile as he hugged her tighter for a minute before letting go with a kiss placed on her forehead.
There was another knock on the door, as he helped Natasha lie down against the pillows again. He placed another kiss on her forehead before heading over to open the door.
Tony, Bruce and Steve all traipsed in following Phil and Clint towards the bedside. Clint sat close to her on the edge of the bed while Phil took the chair he had pulled up earlier.
Tony came over with the syringe of serum as the other two found places to stand. "Are you sure about this?" Tony asked.
"Yes, Tony." Natasha nodded. "I am sure."
"Alright then, ready?" He asked.
"As I'll ever be," She nodded, reaching out a hand to Clint. Clint took her hand as Tony injected the serum into her shoulder.
"I meant what I said about you not having to stay here." She told them all before getting Clint to help her lie flat on the bed. None of them made a move to leave the room. She sighed and looked around the room at each of them.
"You won't get rid of us that easily," Tony told her moving away from the bed.
"I should have known," Natasha muttered. "Don't say I didn't warn you."
Most of the next twenty minutes passed in silence. No-one knowing what to say to each other.
"Clint, I can feel it coming," Natasha whispered. "Я люблю тебя мой ястреб," (I love you my Hawk.) Natasha whispered pain evident in her voice.
"Я тоже тебя люблю мой огненный паук," (I love you too my fiery spider.) Clint whispered back.
Suddenly she arched off the bed letting out a loud scream. "Tasha?" Clint asked. "Tasha?"
His only answer was her hand reaching for his as she whimpered in pain before screaming again. Bruce, Tony and Steve looked at each other unsure what to do.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Bruce muttered before leaving the room. Steve nodded to Tony and followed him out. Clint looked desperately to Tony, "Is there anything you can give her to ease the pain?"
"Nothing that won't affect the enhancers or that she hasn't told Jarvis she's allergic to," Tony replied apologetically. "From the tests we did, we found she pretty much has no choice but to fight her way through it. If she doesn't then the enhancers may not work properly. I'm sorry."
"Don't be, it's not your fault." Clint said quietly. "The man who did this to her, made sure that she couldn't use painkillers without it increasing the amount of pain she's feeling." Clint told him trying to concentrate on something other than Natasha's pained whimpers and occasional screams.
Tony was the next to leave the room, unable to watch any longer. Phil moved next to Clint on the edge of the bed once he was gone putting his hand on Clint's shoulder. The time seemed to pass extremely slowly but eventually the first hour was gone and she started to calm down.
"Tasha?" Clint asked quietly.
"Clint?" Natasha's voice was hoarse from the screaming.
"Yes, it's me Tasha. Water?" Clint offered her a glass. At her nod he helped her to sit up and drink. Once the water was all gone he held her in his arms unwilling to let her go after all the pain she had gone through. "Was that just the first stage?"
"I... I think so." Natasha's voice was still a whisper. "The pain hasn't gone away completely yet and if the third stage was done I should be unconscious."
"Ok, well it's only been an hour so far." Clint told her quietly.
"Feels like so much longer," Natasha whispered. "I felt like I was stuck in my head and couldn't get out." She put her arms around Clint holding him tight as she let the tears flow down her cheeks. Phil reached out a hand to her and replaced his hand on Clint's shoulder. She held on tighter as she began to feel the next stage of pain building up. "Clint, it's... here." Her voice was strained as she felt the first wave of pain wash over her.
"You're going to be ok, Tash." Clint whispered gently lying her back onto the bed again.
"No, no." Natasha held on to him tighter, "Don't leave me."
"I'm not leaving, Tasha," Clint tried to assure her. He sat up with her still in his arms. She was clinging to him like he was her only life line. "Я люблю тебя," (I love you.) Clint whispered not sure if she would hear or not. Natasha didn't reply but continued to hold on to him tightly as wave after wave of pain flowed over her. They sat like that for over an hour before she past out. Tony and Steve occasionally checked back in and brought Bruce back near the end of the third stage. Bruce and Tony immediately started checking her vitals and seeing that they were normal they pronounced that she seemed fine and should wake up at anytime. Clint lay her back on her bed but didn't let go of her hand.
"I'll grab everyone coffee and some food," Steve told them before heading out the door again.
"I need to call Fury I'll be right back," Phil followed him out.
"Sir, there is a small group of people in the lobby wanting to see Agent Coulson." Jarvis informed Stark.
"Who are they? Give me a visual please J," Tony asked.
"Right away, Sir," Jarvis replied pulling up a security feed on Natasha's TV. "They say they are SHIELD Agents May, Ward, Fitz, Simmons, and Skye."
"Hey Hawk, do you know who these people are," Tony asked drawing his attention away from Natasha.
"What, oh yeah, Coulson's new team. Don't let them up here without Coulson's say so," Clint told him. "They weren't supposed to turn up here."
"Oh ok, Jarvis delay them until you can find out what Coulson wants done." Tony ordered.
"Of course Sir," Jarvis answered.
The room was carefully rearranged so Bruce and Tony could set up a heart monitor and a few other pieces of medical equipment. Clint stayed by her side the whole time unwilling to leave in case something went wrong.
A few minutes later Coulson re-entered the room. "Fury wants to speak to you as soon as possible Clint, he said over the phone is fine but it has to be in private."
"Alright," Clint nodded. "I'll call him soon."
"As for my team, did they say what they're doing here?" Coulson asked.
"No they didn't," Tony said before dragging Bruce out the door.
"How long have they been waiting Jarvis?" Phil asked.
"About 5 minutes Sir," Jarvis replied.
"I'll going to head down, see what's up." Coulson said heading for the door, "Call Fury."
"Calling," Clint groaned pulling out his phone.
Coulson headed down to the lobby in the elevator.
"Coulson," May greeted him as he entered the lobby.
"Team." Coulson greeted them." May, what's going on? Why are you all here?" Coulson asked.
"You told us to stay together and Skye wanted to talk to you about something she said she thought might be important," May replied.
"Skye," Coulson asked. "What is it?"
"Someone's been tracking us, and I tracked it back to a server called Red Room," Skye told him quietly.
"Ok, I will need you to show me what you've found," Coulson said quietly. "I need all of you to come with me." Coulson led them all into the elevator. "Common floor please Jarvis." He quickly text Tony, Bruce and Steve to get off the common floor if they were on it. The floor was vacant when they arrived. The young Agents all gasped in shock upon exiting the elevator. None of them had been prepared for how flash and modern the tower was.
"Wait here all of you, I have some things to finish sorting out," Coulson ordered heading towards the elevator again. He headed up several floors to Natasha and Clint's shared floor. He quickly knocked on Natasha's door.
"Coulson?" Clint looked surprised to see him. "What's up?"
"Are you still on the line with Fury?" Coulson asked getting straight to business.
"Yeah, why?" Clint questioned.
"I need to speak to both of you, immediately and in person." Coulson said. Clint handed the phone over, "How soon can you get here Sir?" Coulson asked.
"I can be there in 20 Coulson, what happened?" Fury demanded to know.
"Sir, it's not something we can discuss on the phone."
"You have to give me something Coulson," Fury insisted.
"It concerns some R&R," Coulson muttered.
"R&R you know we can't be doing that right now Coulson," Fury answered.
"Of course not Sir," Coulson replied. "But they are being rather demanding."
"I'll be there in 10," Fury replied. "Tell Barton I'll talk to him then." The phone went dead as he finished speaking.
"Fury said he'll talk to you while he's here," Phil told him.
"What's going on Phil?" Clint asked.
"The Red Room has hacked SHIELD, and been tracking us. One of my Agents found the tracking algorithm and managed to trace it back." Phil told him.
"And that's basically what you told Fury?" Clint asked.
"Yeah," Phil replied.
"Clint?" Natasha's voice quietly broke into the conversation.
"Tasha?" Clint's voice was full of hope. He hurried back to her bed side to find her eyes open. "How are you feeling?"
"Better," Natasha whispered. "How long have I been out?"
"Maybe half an hour or 40 minutes," Clint replied.
"I thought I would be out much longer," She muttered. "Last time I think I was out for days."
"Hows your stomach?" Phil asked.
"Less painful." Natasha smiled. "So what's up?"
"Nat, the Red Room is tracking you." Phil told her. "Skye found the evidence of the tracking algorithm on the bus. We don't know how it got there yet."
"I want to see it," Natasha said quietly pushing herself up.
"You need to rest," Clint said.
"No, I need to see what she found," Natasha said. "I need to see if they are sending anyone after me."
"At least let me help you downstairs?" Clint asked.
"Please," She whispered. Clint quickly helped her to stand catching her as she fell. "I probably should change these bandages and check the stitches."
"I'll do it then I'll take you down," Clint said quietly.
"I'll meet you down on the common floor," Phil said quietly, "I need to meet Fury when he gets here."
"Ok," Clint nodded as he went to get the first aid kit. Clint carefully pulled off the gauze, the wounds were looking a lot better although they were not yet completely healed. "I'm going to take the stitches out Nat. I think you should be ok without them now and they have torn anyway. I'll just bandage the wound closed and we'll see how the enhancers work now."
"Ok," Natasha whispered.
Clint worked quickly bandaging the wounds up tightly. Before lifting her from the bed and heading down the hall to the elevator.
"младшая сестра, ястреб" (younger sister, hawk) May greeted them as they entered the common lounge.
"Mel," Clint greeted her back.
"старшая сестра," (older sister) Natasha replied quietly as Clint gently put her on the couch by the large windows.
"Coffee?" Clint asked her.
"Please," Natasha nodded.
"There's coffee, tea and juice in the kitchen if you want it." Clint told the rest of Coulson's new team heading into the kitchen to make several coffees. Clint had pulled out four mugs knowing both Coulson and Fury would want coffee as well when they arrived in a few minutes. He carefully carried them all into the lounge just as Coulson led Fury into the room. "Coffee?" Clint offered them the coffees he had made.
"Thanks, Barton," Coulson said quietly as Fury just nodded.
"No problem," Clint smiled heading over to Natasha to give her the coffee he had made for her.
"Thank you," She whispered.
"Barton, Romanoff and Skye please go to the briefing room," Fury ordered. "We'll be down in a minute. I need to talk to Stark, Banner and Rogers."
"Yes Sir," Natasha and Clint replied in sync as he helped her up before heading for the elevator. Skye quickly followed them because she had no idea where she was headed.
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