WEDNESDAY DEC XX 10:20 PM
ME
HELLO
IT IS I
DID YOU MISS ME
rude snarky man 🤌
Oh so you didn't fall off the face of the world.
ME
ANSWER THE QUESTION
rude snarky man 🤌
You sound desperate. Are you okay?
ME
No
I've been tortured for the past twenty four hours
AND I WANT TO DIE
rude snarky man 🤌
I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing.
ME
MY FRIENDS
ARE TAKING THINGS OUT OF PROPORTION.
I am currently hiding in the bathroom.
rude snarky man 🤌
I thought you said you were separated from your friends? And that it was the end of the world for you.
ME
I take back those words.
I've never had such awful sleep in my life until something stupid happened.
rude snarky man 🤌
What would said stupid incident be?
ME
Their generator didn't kick on, so now those two AND one of the guys are staying in the house I'm in
I wanna strangle him sometimes istg
Like yesterday OMGGGG THIS MAN KEPT CUTTING ME OFF
And it doesn't help that my friends think something could come out of it 😭😭😭😭
I LITERALLY JUST MET THE GUY SATURDAY. SATURDAY. THIS ISN'T SOME MANGA OR ROMANCE BOOK TYPE OF DHIT
I am sorry the lack of sleep is affecting my brain cells
rude snarky man 🤌
Hm.
Interesting.
ME
rude snarky man 🤌
Is there something the matter?
ME
Mf really says "hm, interesting"
rude snarky man 🤌
I could have just not responded.
ME
you wouldn't
rude snarky man 🤌
If I felt like it I could.
ME
So that means you want to talk to me
rude snarky man 🤌
I was simply confirming you didn't disappear, that's all.
ME
Right.
I would jump you and bury you in the snow for all your smartass comments you've made.
rude snarky man 🤌
I told you I'm not tricked very easily.
ME
Right. Says the one who believed their horrendous roommate got a new number and proceeded to text it without question 🤨
OH
SPEAKING OF OUR ROOTS !!
DID YOU PASS THAT ASSIGNMENT
rude snarky man 🤌
Of course. I hardly come across anything I can't understand.
Surprisingly, Kaveh's part of the assignment was magnificent too. It's extremely rare to see him do well.
Maybe he was afraid of my judgement.
ME
Judgement?? Upon that man??
Bro we aren't at court
Unless you study law ‼️‼️
rude snarky man 🤌
Can you please stop trying to figure out what I'm majoring in?
You're starting to sound like an obsessed fan.
Gross.
You know who has those? That one guy.
ME
That one guy
That's a very blunt statement.
YOU KNOW THAT ONE GUY, YEAH TOTALLY
god let me fight you rn
rude snarky man 🤌
I believe his name is Ajax. But he doesn't like being called that for some odd reason.
He goes by "Childe".
He acts like one too often.
ME
Who?????
rude snarky man 🤌
Are you kidding me?
You literally don't know who he is?
ME
Am I supposed to?
Dude I told you, I don't have many friends. I have my group that I'm with now, I'm befriending my friend's friends.
rude snarky man 🤌
That was poorly written. Just say you're making new friends.
ME
sorry I was trying to sound complex like you
rude snarky man 🤌
😒
ME
But who is Childe?
rude snarky man 🤌
Ginger. Orange hair. Blue eyes. Lanky.
He's very obnoxious. Doesn't know when to shut up.
ME
Sounds like Itto in my history class, except he's very oblivious to stuff.
Are you describing yourself?
rude snarky man 🤌
I think everyone knows Itto.
Quit changing the subject.
ME
I– 🫢
But are you describing yourself?
rude snarky man 🤌
No. Please don't ever compare me to a madman like him.
ME
Are you saying you're better than him?
rude snarky man 🤌
You're changing the subject too much.
He's probably about my height. Maybe a bit shorter.
ME
Sir I do not know how tall you are because I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU????!!!
rude snarky man 🤌
That's too bad.
ME
Why are you sounding like you're the disappointed one now
wtf?????????????
Is this how you treat Kaveh?
And your friends?
rude snarky man 🤌
Maybe you shouldn't call people by accident.
ME
????
YOU ARE MAKING NO SENSE.
ARE YOU OK???
rude snarky man 🤌
I'm perfectly fine. Why do you ask?
ME
I'm losing my marbles rn
You're making no sense.
rude snarky man 🤌
I think you're losing it.
ME
you're losing it ????
Why are you talking weird
rude snarky man 🤌
You already said the lack of sleep is affecting your brain cells.
Good job on using the right one.
ME
we are not in university
please stop trying to educate me or lecture me
rude snarky man 🤌
A lot of students tend to not retain why they've learned in university when they go on break.
And it seems you're one of them.
ME
????
I'm also thinking at this point I'm texting a professor at the university and you've somehow roped a poor innocent student into being your little pet
rude snarky man 🤌
It would be quite strange if a professor had a student as their 'little pet'.
Good thing that my roommate is just some foolish individual.
ME
You're acting too strange tonight
rude snarky man 🤌
Or maybe you've already forgotten all about me.
ME
I would never
not my texting buddy
my number one source of entertainment
rude snarky man 🤌
Not even paid to do it.
ME
we can make it paid
rude snarky man 🤌
No thank you, it involves meeting you so I'll pass.
ME
☹
What are you doing?
rude snarky man 🤌
Avoiding people. Per usual.
ME
you're not avoiding me
rude snarky man 🤌
Because if I don't respond to you, you'll call me.
ME
I only did it that one time to be the topic of your conversation
and it failed miserably
instead it backfired on me !!
rude snarky man 🤌
How would it backfire on you?
ME
because if I ever want to befriend Kaveh, I have to live with the fact that YOURE the reason he was scared half to death on your field trip
rude snarky man 🤌
It was not a field trip.
ME
Road trip.
rude snarky man 🤌
It was nothing but misery with that man.
If anything, you're the reason he was scared half to death.
ME
Not my fault
rude snarky man 🤌
What?
You're kidding.
ME
No not one bit ☺
rude snarky man 🤌
If you didn't call, there wouldn't have been a reason to scare him half to death in order to prevent him from asking who called me.
ME
You should've said it was the number he gave you.
rude snarky man 🤌
For the last time, I am never going to tell him what came out of this.
It's already bad enough living with him.
ME
That's by your choice
So you're putting yourself through that misery kiddo
rude snarky man 🤌
Please don't call me kiddo.
I'm probably older than you.
ME
OH???????
Well it depends, everyone can be different ages in university unlike mandatory schools.
rude snarky man 🤌
If you were someone who went to Uni after a break from school, you would not be texting a random number.
Nor would you have been roomed with Piper.
Who was 21 I believe.
ME
Now I feel like you're the stalker
rude snarky man 🤌
Her arrest was literally made public on the Teyvat News Site. Her age is included dumbass.
ME
I'm not a dumbass
rude snarky man 🤌
Says the one hiding in a bathtub.
ME
LISTEN HERE
It's actually quite comfortable !!
I got a nice little fort going on in here.
Got two pillows, blankets, my phone and a charger.
rude snarky man 🤌
What if you accidentally turn the bathtub on?
ME
I don't sleep with my legs up, I sleep like a normal person.
I bet you probably sleep on your stomach.
rude snarky man 🤌
Kaveh does. He buries his face in the pillow.
I don't understand how someone can be comfortable sleeping like that.
ME
RIGHT
Like how can you breathe????
same with people who sleep under under the covers yk???
like pull the blankets over their head
I feel like I am dying under there
rude snarky man 🤌
You do have a point. Maybe some find it comfortable and relaxing.
ME
Comfortable and relaxing to the point of suffocation???
sounds like a kink
rude snarky man 🤌
And there you go again.
ME
I'm just stating facts bro
rude snarky man 🤌
Bro?
You're really starting to sound like Itto now.
ME
?????????
EVERYONE USES THAT TERM??
rude snarky man 🤌
I don't.
It's not appealing.
ME
Okay bro
rude snarky man 🤌
Please stop.
ME
No bro
rude snarky man 🤌
Sigh.
You live up to your name don't you.
ME
Just for you :) <3
rude snarky man 🤌
It's cold out here.
ME
Cold?
You're outside?
rude snarky man 🤌
I am. I am avoiding people.
ME
Then why don't you go idk to your room or something???
rude snarky man 🤌
Because they have overtaken my room.
ME
Then go sleep on the couch.
rude snarky man 🤌
They're also in the living room.
ME
??????????
THEN GO STEAL ANOTHER ROOM TO SLEEP IN?
rude snarky man 🤌
They're occupied.
ME
So you're at a party.
SNARKY MAN AT PARTY
BRB GONNA GO ANNOUNCE THIS TO THE WORLD
rude snarky man 🤌
Stop jumping to conclusions based off small things stated.
First off, I am not at a party.
Secondly, do not announce to the world about me.
The offer of me blocking you and ignoring you for eternity is still on the table if you do so.
ME
NO FUN.
MISTER NO FUN
Learn how to have some fun.
rude snarky man 🤌
That takes effort.
ME
This is why you'll never have a girlfriend.
rude snarky man 🤌
How did this conversation go from you asking me if you missed me to insulting my personality and saying how I'll never have a girlfriend?
ME
Says the asker who made no sense earlier on.
rude snarky man 🤌
As I said, your lack of sleep is impacting your thoughts.
When you don't get enough sleep, you can eventually become delusional and imagine things. So I simply think you're imagining things. You also claim that your friends have drove you crazy, so I think you're already a lost cause.
I can find some help for you if you want.
ME
STOP STOP STOP
THIS ISNT LECTURE TIME
WE ARE OUT OF UNI ON BREAK
rude snarky man 🤌
So you don't study over break?
ME
So YoU DoNT StUDY ovER BREAK
You're trying to get me to stop texting you aren't you
It's not gonna work
rude snarky man 🤌
Damn.
You're catching on quicker to these kinds of things.
ME
I hope when the day of us meeting comes, that you realize how amazing I actually am.
Probably be your best friend in the whole word.
rude snarky man 🤌
Alright don't blow your ego up that much.
It might pop with the slightest touch of a needle pin.
ME
Did you know if you put a piece of tape over a balloon and poke a needle through it, it won't burst?
That'll be me. The tape is me being immune to your snarky comments.
rude snarky man 🤌
I think that's a bluff.
ME
You think???
It's the truth. There is no thinking when I'm stating a fact.
rude snarky man 🤌
Really now?
ME
Mhm mhm
What if you actually described yourself to me
A ginger?? I don't think I can see you being a ginger.
rude snarky man 🤌
I am NOT a ginger. I would dye my hair a different color if I had the same hair color as Childe's.
There is no way I am anything close to him. The height we are the same but that is it.
ME
Black hair?
rude snarky man 🤌
There have been some people who have suggested me dying my hair black, but I don't think I will.
ME
So you don't have ginger or black hair.
rude snarky man 🤌
Yes, correct.
ME
You're willingly giving me this information???
rude snarky man 🤌
Yes. Because as you and I have both said in the past, there are way too many people on campus to figure out who I am. For all you know, I could be making this up.
ME
If you were making this up, the text you sent me about you needing Kaveh's part of the assignment wouldnt have seemed so demanding and scary.
rude snarky man 🤌
Besides, trying to recognize each individual face at campus would make you seem weird. Would it not?
ME
Stop making sense
Go back to not making sense
rude snarky man 🤌
I don't think you want to be known as the campus stalker or weirdo for trying to find one specific person.
It would make it seem like you have a grudge against them. Or that you're their secret admirer.
ME
If it means I get to find out who you are
rude snarky man 🤌
Please don't.
Don't embarrass yourself like that.
ME
He cares
omg
my heart
He actually cares
rude snarky man 🤌
Kaveh wouldn't go that far to embarrass himself like that. Don't be stupid.
ME
Blah BLAH blah
you care about me
rude snarky man 🤌
I hope someone turns the bath water on while you're in the tub.
ME
Won't happen bc the bathroom only contains myself.
rude snarky man 🤌
Hm.
ME
I will not let anyone into my sanctuary.
rude snarky man 🤌
What if your friends find you?
ME
Ehhh
They're downstairs atm having a few drinks, more people came over and I took my chance and ran.
rude snarky man 🤌
Sounds like something I would do.
ME
You don't like drinking?
rude snarky man 🤌
I do, but not to the point of blacking out and not remembering what I did.
ME
What do you prefer
rude snarky man 🤌
Not telling you.
ME
DAMN IT
Well wine is pretty good
rude snarky man 🤌
It is.
ME
So you LIKE IT
rude snarky man 🤌
I could say I like them all, but knowing won't benefit you.
ME
Sure it will
I can do a survey on campus asking about everyone's preferences on type of alcohol.
rude snarky man 🤌
And I would walk right past you.
ME
Then that means you would be one of the suspects.
rude snarky man 🤌
I'd make sure to avoid you completely.
ME
That would still make you suspicious.
rude snarky man 🤌
If you're not in my sight then there is no reason to hold me as a suspicious person if we never cross paths.
ME
you're making this no fun
rude snarky man 🤌
Again, says the one hiding in the bathroom from her friends.
ME
BECAUSE THEY WOULD TEASE ME ABOUT THAT STUPID GUY THAT I LITERALLY JUST MET
rude snarky man 🤌
Then don't be around him?
ME
I'm stuck in the same house as him.
Fate hates me.
rude snarky man 🤌
Oho, so your fate thing has bit you in the ass.
Funny how that works.
ME
YEAH YEAH YEAH
SHUT IT SNARKY MAN
rude snarky man 🤌
Do you really want me to be quiet?
ME
NO
wait
someone's coming oh no
delivered 11:20 P.M.