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Facing Fear
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"Fear could either do one or two things. It can either protect you from something bad, or it can hinder you from something good. Now in no way am I God to know for sure, but in this situation I'm going with the latter. You've been through so much together. You deserve to love & live in that love babe."
- Lira Alicia Brown-Thompson
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Wednesday | January 6
It was a beautiful Wednesday afternoon where Layton and Lira found themselves enjoying a lunch inside the cafeteria of the hospital where Layton had clinical. Lira had come for a quick checkup, so she'd decided to stay and share lunch with her good friend. It had been a bit since they'd last spoken, so the two were overdue for a girl talk with one another. Layton needed it the most.
"We saw BG the other day, he looks good. I love all the facial hair and weight he's put on. It looks good." Lira's words flowed in between munching on the caesar salad she'd purchased from the salad stand in the cafeteria.
Layton smiled, picturing how much Benji's appearance had changed since he moved to Miami. "Yes, I love it. I get that fine, grown ass man vibe whenever I see him." She'd agreed, admiring the sudden changes he'd made. BG had always been the finest to her, but now he'd put an entire new meaning behind that quite simple term.
Lira nodded as she continued to eat. "So, how's school miss future nurse practitioner? I know this semester is barely even started yet, but how you feeling so far?"
"School is going great. Besides being exhausted nearly everyday, I love being able to do what I do. I can't wait to actually graduate and begin working in the field. All I want right now is to do well in school and have those credentials behind my name. I'm working so hard, and I'm literally putting my all into this. My grandmother's talks and words of wisdom motivate me. We talked, we prayed, we manifested this. Now that I'm here, I feel as if I'd be doing her a dishonor if I didn't give it my all."
Lira nodded as she listened to the passion in her voice. "I can tell this means a lot to you. Work hard now, and it'll be so rewarding later. That's why I pushed through college so young, now I get to fulfill my purpose of just pouring into children. On another note, do you plan to finish school and move with BG after you graduate?"
At the sound of that question, Layton sighed. It wasn't an easy topic to discuss, simply because she wasn't the most sure of her decision yet. Yet again, she didn't just have a clear answer to give. "Lira, honestly I don't even know at this point. I'd planned to be out there by now." She'd expressed. She honestly did planned to had been out there by now, but time just had moved so quickly.
"Layton, come on now girl. It's been over a year now. I am your girl and I love you to death, but let me be real. How long do you plan on being here? After all of those promises you've made that you would be moving soon, what happened Layton? How do you think all of this is making him feel? Just think about if it were you in that position. If BG was the one that kept telling you he was coming and didn't after so long. How would you feel?"
Layton took a moment to just think about it. In reality, she would've felt like he didn't want to come or that he was giving her false promises. It was different when he was the one making her wait for him, versus her doing it. "I don't know, I guess I never really thought about it if it was the other way around." She shrugged, but that had only caused Lira to continue with her real advice.
Lira sighed, "And that's a problem Layton. You have to think about things like that when you care for someone and their feelings. Especially a man that does the same for you. I'm not saying you have to move there if you're not ready, but what are you waiting for? And don't give me the excuse about school. You were accepted into an awesome nursing program in Miami. Hell, better than the one you are in now. So tell me Layton, what's really stopping you from taking it, or just being honest about your true feelings towards the whole move to Miami?"
Layton just stared blankly before speaking. "I'm scared Lira. I'm scared to just pick up my entire life and move with him. What if it doesn't work? What if I move from all that I've known, and it doesn't work out. What if the program there is too vigorous for me, then I fail? What if," Layton continued to make excuses, but Lira cut in.
"And what if you move out there with the man you love and it's the best decision you ever made? What if going there and entering one of the best nursing programs in the south, you thrive and excel? Just like there is a bad side of the coin, there is also a good one. You can't just live your life off of what if, but you move off of what is. You are accepted into a great program. You are in love with a good man that cares about you. What's stopping you from just taking that big leap out on faith Layton?"
"Fear." Layton muttered, playing with her fingers. The answer was rather simple, but it was the honest truth. In all reality, it probably sounded like bullshit .. but it was the truth and that's all she had. Admitting that she was scared to her friend Lira was she first time for her.
Lira nodded, before speaking. "That's a natural feeling Layton but I will tell you this. Fear could either do one or two things. It can either protect you from something bad, or it can hinder you from something good. Now in no way am I God to know for sure, but in this situation I'm going with the latter. You've been through so much together. You deserve to love & live in that love babe."
"I know, I know. I'm just, I've never been this confused before. Well since the whole baby situation of course."
"Well friend I think it's about time you figured it out. It has been a year of you giving unclear answers. A whole year of you giving him hope on a move you're not even sure you're ever gonna make. After while, BG is gonna' be done waiting and I'm not saying you'll be to blame .. but you also can't blame him for walking either. Is that what you want? I'm sorry, I'm just confused Layton."
Layton stared off, running a hand over her face in what felt like a stressful situation. "No, of course not. I know that I love him and I want to be with him. It's just a lot more than just that to consider for me now. But I want to be out with him, which makes it so more confusing."
"But are you showing him that? Are you telling him?"
"What do you mean?"
"From what I can see and that you tell me BG is always showing you how much he loves you. From flying in to see you, always making moves with you as priority, the compromising of his time for you .. I see that. Friend, I can't say I see the same from you. I'm honest and in no way do I want you to feel bad .. but I don't see it babe."
"So what do you think I should do?" Layton asked.
"No, I'm not gonna tell you what I would do. Layton it is coming up on your 23rd birthday. You've been with this man for two years now. Talk to him. For once you move with your heart and not your mind. I did it and I don't regret a thing about it. Married, two kids, career, and falling deeper in love with my husband everyday. I know it doesn't always work out how my story did, but whose to say yours won't be similar or even better?"
"Or worse?" Layton countered.
"See, you gotta' stop thinking that way Layton. You are gonna let your negative devils advocate mind, trick you out of a good thing .. don't let it. You just have to figure out what you want and compromise. But I will say this, BG can't be the only one compromising. A relationship should be mutual. You also have to put in time and the effort to continue to make you all work. If not .. Layton I'm not sure the two of you will continue to make it."
Those words left Layton with lasting thoughts that had her mind scrambled all over the place. Was she really a bad girlfriend? Was she not putting in the effort? What could she possibly do more of? She had so many blank spaces and questions that she couldn't answer lately. It was mind boggling for her, but she knew Lira was right in everything that she said. It made her just take a step back and really evaluate her actions and relationship.
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"I'm here to revisit the terms of the agreement my dad once had with your father. Your father spoke highly of you, so I'm here to speak business and negotiate some prices for future business together out here in Miami." Manny, a potential business partner spoke aloud as he sat next to his right hand man in front of Benji's desk.
Benji found himself conducting a meeting with Manny, doing a favor to his dad who was friends with Manny's father back in the day. If it had been up to BG, it would have not been happening .. but he took the meeting for the sake of not having Jerome breathing down is neck.
BG smirked, shaking his head at Manny. "As much as I am flattered that you'd like to do business with me, let me make this clear upfront .. this is not a negotiation. I make my own deals. Whatever you had with my father, respectfully ain't got shit to do with me. His deals ain't my deals. You're now seeking business with me, so the terms will be aligned accordingly .. my terms." He said to the man before him, making it known to save time.
Manny laughed sarcastically, stroking his goatee. "I get that, but let's be real man. Everything is negotiable."
"Not here. Either you take what I offer or you don't. Its always someone else in line that's ready to accept what I'm offering. Let's be real man, you won't find a weight purer than mine. So, it would be your loss. I'm still gon get the same profit from you or the next buyer. And let me say this, there is always another buyer." Benji said, making sure to put strong emphasis on certain words.
"How much we talking?" Manny finally asked, gritting his teeth at the way Benji spoke. Coming into this, he'd expected to receive a discounted price like Jerome had given his father .. but it was clear that BG was far from what Jerome mentioned to him before setting this up.
"My prices are set. 40 a ki. Depending on your supply, I might knock a couple points off to show appreciation to clientele, but I'm real heavy on that might. Ion' just give out shit for free around here, you gotta earn that."
Manny's eyes grew wide. He hadn't heard much of any thing BG had said after price dropping. "40? You gotta be fucking kidding me man? It was 25 for your pops. It don't get much purer than that ... for sure not 15 stacks worth." Manny complained, in agreement with the guy he'd brought along to accompany him to the meeting.
BG sighed. "Need I remind you, I ain't my father. Yeah our pops worked together back when, true enough. But let's be real, this ain't the 2000s and yo pops was never getting as pure bricks as I'm offering. Trust me on that. My shit worth every dollar of the price. I know that for a fact and I never put my hands on the shit either."
Manny pulled his lip into his mouth as if he still wasn't going for a price so high. Benji sat there looking at him for a response. "Shit, for that price you gone cook, bag, and sell it for me too?" He joked, gaining a laugh from his friend. BG though was the least bit amused by that sarcastic and rather poor attempt at being a smart ass.
Benji held a straight face. "Don't be funny nigga. Like I said, either you gone take it or you not. Shit not gonna' make me any difference either way. If anything I'm the one doing you a favor." He continued, reclining back in his seat as he continued to await a final response. Benji was honestly becoming impatient with Manny and just wanted to say fuck him and the whole deal altogether.
"How I know yo' quality as good as you say? You know, since you never even touched the shit before." Manny's words and smart ass mouth was started to piss BG off.
BG gritted his teeth, trying not to become irritated. "I ain't gotta touch the work to know the worth. Shit, you acting like you wanna' try the shit out yoself or some."
"Can I?" Manny questioned eagerly. Too eager for BG's liking, causing him to scrunch up his face in response. He was thinking the nigga was joking, but once he just stared back at BG expectantly.. he knew he hadn't been joking at all. That was a red flag, but nonetheless Benji motioned over for Zyir to grab a sample of the product.
Zyir exited the room and came back quickly with a line of the coke, just enough for Manny to sample it. He did just that, quickly snorting the line of coke into his right nostril. A smile graces Manny's face as the euphoria of the pure drug rushed through his body. BG sat, utterly disgusted at the coke headed dealer in his presence. It was bad for business and made him second guess even dealing with a dude that obviously played around with his nose. It wasn't anything personal against those that did, but it got very personal when it came to his funds.
"Damn, maybe the 40 not so bad after all." Manny said with a grin as he wiped the white residue from his nose using his left thumb. "So, about consignment? Is that a standing option? I know yo dad use to let my pops .."
"Listen, if you came into this shit expecting the deal of what my pops gave you or yo pops, you may as well get the fuck outta here now. This ain't that my guy. Ion' do consignment. Either you got the money to buy full out or you don't. Fuck you think I'm bout to give you some shit as good as this on a fucking layaway or some? Nah nigga. You got it or you don't. And if you don't ... well, it's plenty muhfuckas that do so don't waste my time."
Manny was disappointed, but nonetheless he nodded. The euphoric feeling from the drugs had him dazed. It wasn't in his best interest to agree to anything, so with that he didn't. "Can I get back to you? I need to speak with my team and make sure we can commit to 40. Yo shit clutch, I give you that .. but 40 hella high for it."
"24 hours." BG retorted, not really giving a fuck about nothing else he'd just said. He had a full day to decide before the ball was rolling onto the next buyer in line.
Manny nodded. "I'll be in touch." He'd said as he stood extending his hand outward for BG to shake. Benji got up as well, staring down at the extended hand. Instead, he formed a first and bumped his hand before letting it be what it was. BG wasn't a friendly nigga, and after he had sat with Manny for all of 30 minutes, he wasn't too fond of the dude to even try to fake kick it right now.
That concluded the meeting and Manny left, his right hand man flanking his back. As they neared the exit, it was Zyir who followed them and made sure they made it out of the building without any issues. Once they had left, Zyir made his way back inside, wearing a frown.
"Nigga, where the fuck you find this bum ass nigga at?It look like that nigga play in his product and he got a fly ass mouth. Shit like that get you popped, on brody." Zyir said, clearly annoyed with Manny and his goon.
"Nigga, my pops use to do business with his pops. That is the only reason that nigga even got the time of day. I did this shit as a favor to Jerome. The dude tryna move in on some unmarked territory out here, so shit as long as he copping his shit from me .. I personally don't give a fuck where he do it at. The whole purpose out here is to be the distributor. We upgraded from all that corner boy shit. They handle that. So as long as that nigga can come up off the racks, I could care less about his funky ass attitude or his snorting ass coke habit either."
Zy nodded, taking in what Benji had said to him. "Well that nigga almost got his ass beat talking crazy. I hate a bum ass nigga like that, shit make my ass itch for real."
BG shook his head. "Nigga, relax. Don't you got some shit to do? Ion' know, work maybe?" He asked Zyir.
Zyir shook his head as he plopped down into the chair in front of BG's desk. "Nope. Zyon counted all the shit we picked up for the week and handed it off to Megan this morning. Speaking of Megan, shorty bad as fuck. You mean to tell me y'all been friends and yeen' never smash? Tell the truth, shame the devil." BG scrunched up his face, while Zyir waited on him to respond. "So I guess ima' take that as you smashed. That shit was fye wasn't it? I knew it. I can tell." Zyir grinned at Benji.
"Nigga, you don't know shit. Mind ya fuckin business." BG retorted, not admitting that him and Megan had a past of fooling around together. It was what it was, the shit was a wrap now so it wasn't no need to speak on it. They were strictly friends now, nothing more or less.
Zyir smirked, but kept at it. "Well, im tryna step down. Ain't y'all good friends or some shit? Put a nigga on."
BG shook his head. "She don't want yo dumb, scrawny, flat face ass .. relax." He said, laying Zyir out. Zy found it funny when BG joked. It was even funnier because it came out in a dead ass serious tone, not a joking one.
"Damn, how you know? I'm a good ass dude. Shit, you won't put me on or let me meet yo sister, so lemme get down with yo best friend or whatever you call her." He said, only irritating Benji more. He didn't wanna even think about Zyir and Megan together .. let alone Jada.
"Nigga, shut the fuck up and get out."
Zyir sucked his teeth. "Damn, it's like that?"
BG sucked his teeth. "Been like that. I'm done today. I suggest you go find you else some to do, lil' kid shit."
"Nigga, you only three years older than me." Zy stated, giving him a nigga please look as Benji grabbed for his keys to leave out. Benji had just turned 23, while Zyir would be turning 21 in the upcoming month October.
"Exactly nigga." Benji responded briefly as he headed out of the door, leaving Zyir to finish and lock up for the night. Work had been kicking his ass lately, so BG stopped and picked up himself some dinner before he headed in for the night. Work was done early for him, so he used the opportunity to go home and just relax.
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"Yo, how the fuck you get in my crib?" BG frowned the instance he stepped off of the elevator in his penthouse apartment. He came over to the couch where Jada was comfortably perched along his couch, her feet propped up as she watched Netflix on his TV. BG was confused, but moreso interested as to why she was even out here.
"Well hello to you too, brother." Jada laughed, finding a bit of humor in his response .. but he wasn't joking at all. "What you got to eat?" She continued, reaching her hand across the table for his bag, but he pulled it away.
Benji frowned. "Wassup Jada. Run that shit by me one more time, cause I missed it." BG said, referring to the question he'd asked that she'd just blatantly ignored.
Jada shrugged her shoulders. "Relax your doorman let me come on up. Speaking of which, why isn't my name on the list anyway? I feel offended." She said as she sat there, watching him open his box of food. BG was what anyone would call a picky and plain eater, it was weird. He had a plate full of lemon pepper wings all flats, and fries. No ketchup, no seasoning, no ranch, just plain.
"Ain't nobody on the list, cause ion like it when people pop up on me unannounced." He said purposely giving her a look, letting her know he wasn't feeling this visit. He loved Jada to death, but he loved his privacy just as much. It was cool sometimes, but she was pushing it.
"Well I'm here now so. I didn't think you'd mind."
BG shook his head. "Nah, I mind. Anyway, wassup? Yo ass 'pose to be back in LA for school. Why you here?"
"Welll .. I'm thinking about transferring out here. Plus I just wanted to come out and see my brother. Is that a crime? Damn, are you not happy to see me?" She said.
BG frowned. "What make you think about some dumb shit like that? You just started out there in August." He said, clearly ignoring the latter part of what she'd said.
Jada shrugged, drifting off into thought. "I don't know, I just want to explore something new. I like it out here. It's warm, vibes are nice, and it's not as crowded here." Jada said, half way explaining to him why she had that sudden interest in Miami. BG wasn't buying it though.
"Jada, why you here?" He asked her again, this time he was hoping for an honest answer and not a bullshit ass answer like she'd just given him. She could only sigh.
"Okay, so I dropped out of school. It's no big deal." She said, sitting up and stealing a fry from his plate only to turn her nose up at the bland taste of fried potatoes.
"Yes, big deal. Fuck is you talm' bout? Why you quittin school already Jada? And just go get a plate bro." Benji fussed, trying to hide his irritation. He didn't like when folks reached into his plate. BG was a picky dude, so he had plenty of pet peeves that he just couldn't get rid of.
Jada smiled as she hopped up to grab a plate out of the kitchen. "It's hard, I like to party, and I guess I liked it way too much where I wasn't doing my work." She said as she came back and he gave her some of his food. He shook his head at the simple and poor excuse she had.
"That ain't a good look. How you think yo pops gonna' feel once he find out that you dropping out of school?"
"Our pops isn't gonna feel any kind of way, because we aren't going to tell him. Not any time soon anyway."
BG sucked his teeth. "Yeah, aight. So what you bout to do with yo life Jada? You know he gone find out soon."
She shrugged, eating one of the wings he'd gave her. "I don't know just yet. I'm thinking about maybe being a celebrity MUA or even an Instagram model. I hear that is pretty easy and quite fun way to make a nice living."
"So in other words, you wanna be a thot or a MUA for a bunch of thots?" Benji asked bluntly after dissecting the career choice she was oh so suddenly interested in.
Jada rolled her eyes. "No, I don't want to be a thot. I'm confused, okay? Give me some time to think about it." She said, dismissing the whole conversation at hand. It was still confusing for him as to why she was even here right now. It wasn't to tell him that she dropped out of school or to see him, they'd just saw one another a few weeks ago for New Years so he clearly wasn't buying it.
"Jada, why you here?" He asked for the third time. She sighed, wishing that he would just drop it and let it be.
"I told you bro, I just came out here to see you."
"Yeah, you said that already. But why you really here?" He asked her again as he side eyed her suspiciously. It wasn't that he wasn't cool with her being here, but that wasn't the real reason she'd shown up all of a sudden.
"Well.. I'm pregnant. So, there's that." Jada finally said aloud, as if it was the most natural and normal thing in the world to blatantly admit to her oldest brother. Jada was just so full of surprises today, he couldn't keep up.
"Oh shit." Benji responded in shock, that had been the least bit of things that he had expected to come out of his twenty year old sister's mouth. He thought he was surprised then, but what she said next was the real tea, fuck it this was no longer even tea. This was Hennessy.
"And I need you to go with me to get the abortion."
"Yo, what the fuck?" He frowned quickly, hearing what she'd just revealed to him. "How the fuck that happen? Ain't you on birth control, or some shit to prevent that. Ion' know, shit maybe make that nigga strap up first?"
Jada scrunched up her face, shaking her head. "Well so I'm allergic to latex and we didn't have any of the other non-latex ones so going raw it was." She explained and it was BG's turn to frown up at his little sister. The two of them had grown rather close since finding out about the other, but he wouldn't say that they were this close.
"Aight, damn. Don't you got friends for shit like this? I fuck wit' you, but ion know if I fuck wit' you like that to hear bout you fucking and shit. Nah, this shit is weird."
"Yeah, I do have friends.. but they talk too much." Jada said, taking a deep breath before continuing. "I know it is kinda' weird coming to you, but I did because I knew you wouldn't judge me. I know you don't wanna' be an uncle just as much as I don't wanna' be a mom. So, will you go with me to get the abortion? I'm scared to go by myself, I just need somebody there with me." She said.
BG rubbed his goatee with his left hand, thinking over what exactly she was asking him. "Ion' know Jada. Ian' gone say I'm 100% anti abortions and shit, but .." Benji trailed off, not wanting to just straight up tell her no.
Jada frowned, not liking the answer he'd gave. "Do you really think I'm about to be somebody's momma at 21? No, I can't. I'm not ready for that type of responsibility right now. My life is literally just beginning, getting out from under dad's overbearing and protective ways."
"Well, you should've thought about that while you was out in LA letting niggas fuck without a rubber and still not taking your BC. Listen, just think about it first and then make your decision. Besides, what that nigga that get you pregnant have to say about all this?" BG asked.
Jada shrugged. "I haven't told him, because soon there will be nothing to tell. Well, that is if you can just agree to go with me. And I've already thought about it, I have made up my mind. Two months, I've thought about it."
BG's face morphed into one of surprise. "Damn, so you been hiding this shit way since Thanksgiving?" He say, shaking his head. "And you need to tell him Jada, don't be one of those. Ion' know who the knuckle head nigga is, but I think he at least deserve to know he could be a father sometime soon." He expressed. That came from his personal perspective, he would be pissed if he got a female pregnant and she didn't even tell him about it.
"For what? He'll be happy that I decided to take care of it on my own. I'd rather not even bring it up to him. So that's that. My mind is made up. My body, my choice."
"It ain't just an object you can get rid of Jada. This is a whole baby we talking about right now, not an 'it'."
"I know, I know. I've been trying not to think of it that way though, for my own sanity. My mind is made up, I just want you to be there with me. So, will you do it?"
BG sighed, hating to be in this position. "You sure you don't wanna' ask yo twin?" He said, referring to Jace.
She shook her head quickly. "Jace talks too much, no. I wouldn't bring him to anything I didn't want anyone to know about." Jada continued. She could sense the look on his face, he didn't want to go. "Please?" She added.
"Aight, aight. I'll go. But, give ya self another week and get back with me on it. If you still feelin' the same way, then I'll go. If you don't, then I guess I'll be an uncle in a couple months. Either way, just really think about it. Having an abortion ain't nun' small Jada. It could just change you, yo ability to have kids. Do you want kids?"
"Yes, of course .. just not now. Maybe when I'm 30."
BG nodded. "A week."
"Fine." Jada agreed. "I don't think a week will change a thing, but okay. Oh and I'm staying here with you until then." She smiled as she stole another French fry from his plate. BG's face morphed into one of that said what the fuck, but he didn't even let it come out his mouth.
Benji sighed, shaking his head. "Aight, whatever Jada. Just stay outta my room. And you can have the rest of this shit, I'm bout to go smoke." He said, getting up to head for his room. Jada nodded as she slid the plate in front of her and began to devour the rest of his wings.
After retreating to his room, BG went for his stash and headed out onto the balcony to roll up. He'd become a pro at pearling, so it took him little to no time before it was lit and the aroma from the marijuana drifted up in to the night's cool air. Benji tried his best not to smoke inside of his penthouse. He personally didn't care for a loud scent like that inside, so he just smoked outdoors.
"Hey," the sweet sound of his girlfriend, Layton rang in the evening air, as he answered his phone. She popped into the square frame on his phone, laid in the comfort of her bed as she stared back at him. Quickly, Benji got a weird feeling from the call. Benji was good at picking up on a vibe & energy, and for some reason something felt strange to him but he decided not to mention it.
"Wassup." Benji responded briefly, yet skeptically. His feeling of concern crept over him as he waited for what response was to come next, preparing himself for that.
Layton propped her head up on her hand. "You okay?" She asked, causing a slight frown to form on his face as he took a pull from the blunt. The conversation Layton had shared with Lira earlier had her feeling the worse.
"I'm straight ... you okay?"
"Yes, I'm fine. Are we okay?" Layton continued.
BG sighed, taking yet another pull at that question. "Yo Layton, what you getting at with these questions? I can handle whatever, but don't beat around the bush bro."
Layton shrugged, looking away. "I don't know, I just .. I wanted to be sure. It's not like we've been the happy couple lately, so I just wanted to ask." She said quickly, causing him to relax just a little. It wasn't his intention to go so hard on her, but at this point he was scared. It was like Layton had so much control over him, and she didn't even realize how much .. so he was scared of her being the one to just call it quits or break up with him.
He nod. "We good. Unless it's some shit you got on yo' chest to say to me or some?" BG said, again coming at her in a way that she didn't like. Layton wasn't perfect at all and know that she'd been allowing her life to get control over their relationship, but that still wasn't the excuse for him talking to her the way that he was now.
Layton frowned, not caring for the tone of voice or how he was coming at her all of a sudden. "Why you talking to me like that?" She asked him, clearly uninterested.
"Like what?"
"Like you are expecting me to say something different or like there is something I'm not telling you or some."
"Well, shit is there?" BG retorted quickly. It was crazy that in reality, it was and that wasn't even what he was referring too at the time. Her school wasn't even on his mind at that point, but it was the very thing she wasn't telling him the truth about. All of it was complicated.
"Look, I don't like how you're talking to me right now. I don't know what the problem is, but I just wanted to make sure that we were good and to tell you I love you. If you don't want to talk that's all you had to say." That was the end of that, because next she hung up. BG just sat there for a moment, surprised that she'd done that.
Layton knew how much he hated when she hung up in his face, but Layton hated to be talked too the way that he was when he was going through something or upset about something. After taking a deep breath, BG called her back. To his surprise, she answered with her phone camera on pause so that he could no longer see her.
"Man, stop fuckin' playing." BG said quickly, trying the very best he could at not getting aggravated with her.
"You really want me to hang up again? What's up with you?" Layton asked, spewing attitude in her words.
Benji sighed, stubbing out the blunt in the ashtray and relaxed back in his seat. "Ion know. I'm sorry for talkin to you crazy, but don't hang up on me and shit. Oh and turn yo camera back on." He said as he waited to see.
Within a brief moment she reappeared onto the screen of his phone. "Yeah, okay. I just wanted to tell you that I love you and see how your day was going. We haven't talked at all today, so I just wanted to check in on you."
"I'm good. We good."
"Good. That's all I wanted to hear."
He nod. "What you doing?"
"Laying down. We got out early today, so I'm using the opportunity to catch up on some rest. I've been so tired lately, coffee isn't seeming to do the trick for me at all."
"Shit, me too. I'm tired as hell. I'm prolly bout to take a shower and call it a night too." Benji responded back.
She nodded. "Well, get your rest. I'll talk to you later. I love you Benjiman Cartier Gotti, always. Goodnight."
"I love you too Layton Iman Westbrooks." He said, this giving her an odd feeling. Usually when he said her full name, he added his last name instead of hers. Maybe it was a little childish, but the fact that he didn't this time had her mind wandering and overthinking heavily too.
After ending the call, BG ran a hand across his face. He moved to sit at the very edge of the chair, his elbows at his knees and his head in hand. He was tired of all that hot and cold shit when it came to his life. He knew that life wasn't just easy for everyone, but damn why him?
"God, ion' know what you doing .. but I trust you." BG said as he looked into the darkening sky. It was still at most difficult for him to freely speak to God, but that's only what made him keep trying harder and harder. A fear of not knowing God or God not hearing him was a big part of it all, but still he tried his hand at praying as he hoped that the Lord heard him each and every time.
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I hope you all enjoyed the chapter!
Please leave your thoughts, comments, questions, and or concerns below & I'll be sure to address them all.
Be appreciative of these calm chapters, because let me just say this .. the STORM is coming sooner than you might think. Stay ready so you never gotta get ready.
Please excuse any errors, story has not been edited.
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life has been lifting y'all. say a prayer for your girl as always. thank you to those that always check in!
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Chapter | 2 | Questions :
1. How do you feel about Layton's reasoning behind her decision or the delay in her decision of moving? Do you feel like it's valid or is she just stringing him on because she can or doesn't want to move? Do you think she really wants to be with him for real or no?
2. Benji is tired of waiting on her, what y'all think should happen? Should we throw in some jealousy? A new girl? A moment with him and Megan? Something to stir up the pot a little more. We love some good drama! We shall see 👀
3. How have y'all been? It's been quite a minute. I'm sorryyyyyy. Life is taking its course and I'm trying to keep up with it. Along with that, this chapter was just drug out and hard to write for me for some reason. Anyway, HOW YALL DOINNGGGGGGGG?
xoxo Vanessa