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Chapter 5
Terrence ended up bringing me home after we went to the mall. He told me that he needed to attend something regarding business. Wala akong naging tanong tungkol doon. It's not that he is obliged to tell me his whereabouts as we both stay here in Benguet.
Hindi dahil tumitigil kami sa iisang bubong at matagal niyang hinawakan ang kamay ko kanina, may karapatan na ako. We are still strangers to each other. Kahit pa iba ang dating sa akin sa naging paghawak niya sa kamay ko.
Holding hands is just normal nowadays. Kahit sino ay puwedeng maghawakan ng kamay. Maraming beses na akong nagpahawak sa kamay ko sa mga nakalipas kong reaksyon. There's nothing special with it. It's no extraordinary. But when it's Terrence who's holding me...when he's the one kissing on my cheek...it feels different.
"Kumusta naman ang trip mo diyan sa Benguet? Did Michael already introduce you to his family?"
Umikot ang mga mata ko sa naging tanong ni Ruth. She's my best friend since we're college. Sinabi ko sa kaniya ang agenda ko dito sa Baguio. She was excited as much as I was. Akala namin parehas, magkakaroon na ng magandang progress sa relasiyon namin ni Michael. It turned out to be a failure though.
The disadvantage of expecting too much.
"No way! Sugar mommy? The audacity of that guy! At saka, seryoso bang twenty five lang siya? He's too young, Priscilla!" she blurted out after telling her the story.
Naupo ako sa couch at tamad na binuksan ang tv. I wasn't in the mood to watch anything. Ang kaso, wala naman akong gagawin dito maghapon. Wala rin akong gana mamasyal. Mamaya sigurong hapon ay lalabas ako at tutungo sa park na malapit.
"Can you imagine my reaction when he told me his real age? Hindi ako makapaniwalang nagkarelasyon kami! I wanted to punch him in the face that night. Idagdag pa na nakita ko siya kahapon sa SM na may kasama na babae."
"Grabe. You were deceived by that guy. Nakikinita ko na ang reaksyon ni Eula kapag nalaman niya ito. Maybe the reason why she kept on insisting that he's not a good catch for you. Mother's instinct, I guess."
I kept on changing the channel endlessly. I can't choose something that piques my interest. Magtutulog na lang siguro ako kapag natapos ang tawag na ito.
"Wait. Remember the thing I was telling you before you went there? Iyong crush ko na isang Monasterio!"
Those words from Ruth caught my attention.
"What about it?"
"Well, I stalked his Facebook early this morning and found out that he's also in Baguio! I saw a picture that he just uploaded!"
Wait. Monasterio? Is he referring to Terrence? Naaalala ko na ikinukwento niya sa akin na may crush siyang isang businessman pero hindi ko naman nabibigyan ng atensyon dahil abala ako sa kabi-kabilang meetings. Was she referring to that certain Monasterio?
"Okay. What's the name of that guy?" I tried to sound my voice uninterested.
"Terrence Monasterio! He's the grandson of the top banker here in the Philippines, Flavian Follosco!"
Oh, great.
So she likes him? To the extent of what? Bakit ba hindi ako naging attentive kapag nagkukwento siya tungkol doon? Kapag nalaman niyang kilala ko ang binabanggit niya at nakakasama pa sa iisang kwarto, ano na lang ang iisipin niya?
"Well, it could be nice if you're here. At least you have the chance to see him." sabi ko.
"Oo nga. Sunod kaya ako? Kaya lang marami akong kailangan gawin dito. Isa pa, baka hindi rin naman siya magtagal diyan. The chance of being noticed by him would be small. I heard that he's playboy rin."
He is? It doesn't look like that. Parang seryoso siya palagi kung umakto. He knows how to play with words though. Sa simpleng mga salita, kaya niyang magpakilig.
Or is it just me?
"Baka rumors lang rin," sabi ko. "Is he single?"
"Oo ata. Maraming napapabalitang babae na naghahabol. Pero walang balita na nagseryoso."
Sino bang hindi maghahabol sa ganoong itsura ng lalaki? He got everything every man could ever asked for. Gwapo, mayaman, maganda ang katawan at halatang magaling sa kama.
"Kahit sino naman ay maghahabol sa isang Monasterio. I mean, walang tapon sa kanilang lahat. Kahit ang mga babae nila ay panglaban."
I think I have met some of the Monasterio women. I just don't remember who is who.
Natapos ang pag-uusap namin ni Ruth tungkol sa mga Monasterio. We talked about something else until she decided to end the call for she had to attend a meeting.
Nang wala na ulit ginagawa ay nag-scroll ako sa Facebook. I looked for Terrence name on it. Baka lang naman makita ko dahil interesado ako sa sinabi ni Ruth na nag-post daw ito ng picture.
I typed Terrence Monasterio in the search box. Lumabas rin kaagad ang pangalan niya. I'm not sure if it's him for I can only see a black car as the profile picture.
It wasn't on private kaya madali akong nakapasok. Para masigurong siya nga ay tiningnan ko ang ibang profile picture. I just became sure when I saw a picture of him wearing a business suit while sitting on the swivel chair. He was slightly smirking — the same smirk I saw him always wearing. Behind him were the tall building from afar.
"You...are so fine." I muttered while staring at his picture.
Pinagsawa ko ang sarili sa pagtitig doon. Nang matapos ay tiningnan ko naman ang profile niya. I checked his timeline and saw a snapshot of a place located in Benguet.
"This must be the picture Ruth was talking about."
Ila-like ko sana pero naalala kong hindi naman kami friends. Kaya huway na lang. Ayaw ko rin naman siyang i-add sa Facebook.
I closed the app and decided to take a nap. Hapon na ako nagising at wala pa rin si Terrence. Kung ganito lang rin ang gagawin ko sa buong maghapon sa mga susunod na araw, uuwi na lang ako ng Maynila. Kaysa naman nagsasayang ako ng oras dito sa kakatunganga.
Naligo ako at nagbihis ng kaswal. I wear a gray sweatpants and black spaghetti top. Dahil malamig ang klima lalo na sa gabi, nagsuot na rin ako ng cardigan.
I went to the nearest park where there's a fountain being lighted every night. Wala naman gaanong tao hindi katulad kahapon. I sat on the bench and let the peaceful air fill my lungs.
If only the atmosphere in Manila was like this...
Sa ilang minutong pagkakatulala ay naagaw ang atensyon ko ng isang magkasintahan. The man knelt down in front of the girl. Inilabas niya ang isang maliit na box mula sa bulsa ng pantalon at ipinakita ito sa babae. The girl covered his mouth while looking at it — a cliche reaction.
Tinanggap niya rin naman at inilahad ang kamay. The man wore the ring on her finger and stood up. Mahigpit niyang niyakap ang babae kasabay ng mga fireworks na sumabog sa madilim na kalangitan. Its colors bursted out and combined with the glittering stars.
Ngumiwi ako nang magpalakpalakan ang mga taong naroon. I simply rolled my eyes after.
"Corny." I whispered inwardly.
Nakarinig ako ng bahaw na tawa mula sa tabi ko. Mabilis akong lumingon para lang makita si Terrence na ngayon ay nakaupo na sa tabi ko. There was a playful grin spread across his lips while looking at the couple.
"You don't find it sweet?" he asked.
It made me bring my attention back to them. They're still hugging, their bodies slightly swaying as if they were dancing in the tune of silent music.
"I prefer a private proposal. Iyong kaming dalawa lang at walang ibang nakakakita. I find it sweeter than showing it in the crowd."
"Hmm. You are not hard to please then."
"You can say that. I just want a loyal and honest man."
"And a younger than you, too."
"That's the first goal."
"What if you fell towards a man who is younger than your age? Let's say both feelings are genuine. Would you drop him just because it's against your belief?"
Wala sa sarili ko siyang binalingan. He was still looking ahead of us. Pero nang makita akong pinagmamasdan siya, tiningnan niya na rin ako pabalik.
He's the first one who asked me that. I wasn't prepared. Kahit sa isasagot ko, hindi ko alam kung ano ang dapat.
Huminga ako nang malalim at nag-iwas ng tingin sa kaniya.
"The world was created by judgemental people. Ang mga ganitong sitwasyon, higit na mas matanda ang lalaki o hindi kaya ay mas matanda ang babae, masama na ang tingin ng ibang tao. I've been judged by others because I had a relationship before with someone who is eight years younger than me. They called me names. Na kesyo dahil mayaman ako, kahit sino ay papatulan ko. The guy didn't do anything to defend me," I let out a bitter smile. "He broke up with me just because those people kept on judging us. They even called me as the sugar mommy."
"Hmm. A hot sugar mommy, you mean?"
Nilingon ko siya, masama ang tingin. "I'm still young to be a sugar mommy!"
Humalakhak siya. Para bang hindi niya naman sineseryoso ang klase ng usapan na mayroon kami.
"I like it more when a woman is older than me, Priscilla. I think they can handle relationships well. Less talk, less fights, that's what make them more attractive to me."
Well, I hate fights, too. Parehas kami. Ayaw ko sa maingay na relasyon. Baka...puwede kami?
Of course not.
"I only want my woman to be loud when we're in a bed. I prefer them screaming actually."
Tila nanuyo ang lalamunan ko sa mga salitang binitawan ni Terrence. Hindi ko magawang tumingin sa kaniya dahil pakiramdam ko, mapapaso ako oras na maglapat ang mga mata namin.
"Do you scream, Priscilla?"
My hand unconsciously balled into fist. I tried to be casual and showed him that his question doesn't intimidate me. Natawa ako at nilingon siya. Mataman siyang nakatitig sa akin, madilim ang mga mata.
"How would I know? I haven't t-tried doing it with anyone." amin ko.
Dumaan ang ngisi sa labi niya. The way he did it made the hair on my nape rise.
"Are you curious to know then?"
At my age, of course I am! Pero hindi ko iyon sasabihin siyempre. Nakakahiyang malaman niya sa ganitong edad ko, tigang na tigang ako pagdating sa bagay na 'yon.
"No need to answer. I already know it." he said it so casual before heaving a sigh. Tumayo siya pagkatapos dahilan para tingalain ko siya. "It's getting colder here. Coffee in our room? I'll order for us."
Tumango ako, wala sa sarili. The tension our topic just gave me right now was too scorching it made me feel uneasy. May gusto akong mangyari. Gustong gusto ko pero hindi ko magawang aminin sa sarili ko.
Huminga ako nang malalim at tumayo na. We both walked towards Casa Vallejo in silence. Pagkarating sa loob ng kwarto namin ay nauna akong pumasok. Naglakad ako papunta sa couch. Bago umupo ay pumikit ang mga mata ko, pilit inaalis ang mga bagay sa isip.
Why am I suddenly curious right now? Why is his presence all of sudden make me feel hungry experiencing that? Nakakainis na sa isang estranghero pa ako nakaramdam ng ganito at iyong mas bata pa sa akin!
"Damn it." I muttered under my breath as if it's a problem.
Isang beses pa akong nagpakawala ng buntonghininga bago pumihit patalikod. My heart thundered inside my chest when I saw Terrence standing just meters away from me. His dark eyes were penetrating mine.
"T-Terrence..."
His shoulders heaved up and fell for a deep sigh. Malalaki ang naging hakbang niya papalapit sa akin. The moment he got a hold of me, he pushed me and pinned me against the wall with my hands cornered above my head.
Inatake niya ako ng halik sa labi, mariin at puno ng gigil. Humigpit ang pagkakahawak niya sa palapulsuhan ko, sumasabay sa mga diin ng labi niya. It made me grasp, it made me breathe inside his mouth.
"I don't see our five years age gap a problem for us," he whispered huskily through our wild kisses. "Give in to me, Priscilla. Let's both give it a try."
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