The day Cale visited her for the first time was weeks ago by now. And ever since then, Cale would regularly come by to her office every few days. He never stayed for long, an hour would be the longest time.
During these visits, he never brought up any risky topic ever again. They would have tea together and talk about many things, starting from Empire matters like the recent treaty with another Kingdom to personal matters like how Cale's children were begging him to travel with them.
"Why don't you humor them? Raon can teleport and save a lot of time and effort anyway, right?"
She couldn't stop a giggle as she took in his appalled expression.
"Your Majesty," Cale put down his teacup, eyes wide tinged with fear, "once we go on one trip, the children will want more. We'll end up going around the world! And when that's not enough, they'll ask to use the divine item and go to different worlds! What about my farm?! My slacker life?!"
(Y/n) nearly snorted when Cale's expression turned horrified at the thought of losing his dearly beloved slacker life.
How adorable.
(Y/n) enjoyed these talks. She found herself beginning to open up to the red-haired noble and he did the same to her. She learned more about the normally stoic and level-headed ex-Commander, as he too learned more about her.
When the days began to blur together, she found herself looking forward to his visits.
She found herself feeling the same warmth and tranquility she always felt when she was with Alberu.
And that scared her more than anything else.
"Love, are you okay?"
(Y/n) gave the man in front of her a small smile.
"Of course."
Alberu frowned. (Y/n) had been very quiet for the past few days. He also noticed how she tried to avoid his eyes most of the time. He had an inkling as to why that might be, but it was still concerning to see her starting to lose appetite.
With a wave of his hand, the servants waiting on them in the greenhouse they were having their meal in left them.
The Emperor gently took his wife's hand on his own, his thumb rubbing her knuckles absentmindedly.
He noted how (y/n) never lifted her head up to look him in the eyes.
"(Y/n)."
It did the trick as her head immediately snapped up to look at him.
Alberu rarely called (y/n) by her name. He always used pet names, most of the time 'love'. It was a habit he'd had since their courting days; when Alberu was but a youth craving for love in the midst of his lonely days in the Palace. While he still occasionally called out her name, as he did love her name as much as he loved her, the amount of times had dropped low since the day they married a little less than a year ago.
And thus to hear Alberu calling her name in a serious tone like this ought to surprise her enough to make her abandon her attempt at avoidance.
Alberu's eyes softened when he took in the sight of her surprise (and was that worry?).
"(Y/n), love," he pressed a kiss to her knuckles, once again trying to pretend not to notice her flinching, "something is bothering you, isn't it? Won't you tell me? I'd like to help you."
(Y/n)'s throat tightened as she tried to futilely swallow back the heaviness that seemed to choke her, the dryness in her mouth preventing the action.
Alberu was... sweet.
He'd done nothing but be a loving and supporting partner for her since the day they began courting.
He was the epitome of a perfect significant other; a spouse who never failed to be a gentleman and a lover.
Looks, personality, wealth, affection, he had them all.
So how could she turn away from such a man so easily?
How could her heart betray her like this?
But I still love Alberu, her traitorous heart whispered.
It's not like my love for him diminished...
'That's not the point!' Her rational mind screamed back.
'You still betrayed him! His love! His TRUST!'
(Y/n) took in Alberu's gaze, filled with love and worry.
That's right, I betrayed him.
And he doesn't deserve this.
I have to tell him.
It's the least I can do...
"Alberu," she called out softly.
"Yes, my love?" He answered, lips still brushing against her knuckles.
(Y/n) took a deep breath, ignoring the prickling on the corner of her eyes and focusing on stopping her voice from wavering.
"I love you."
Alberu smiled gently.
"I-"
"But I have betrayed you."
Alberu's words were cut off as he blinked in surprise.
(Y/n) still couldn't bring himself to look Alberu in his eyes.
"I betrayed your trust," she managed to choke out, "I tainted our sacred promise and let you down. I'm unfaithful, a disgrace to your name."
The forlorn Empress closed her eyes and bowed her head. No words escaped her mouth after the broken confession. What else could she do now but expect the worst?
Alberu was known far and wide as a ruler with seemingly unlimited patience, but people also know not to test that theory. Nobody wronged the quarter Dark Elf and got away with it scot free. (Y/n) knew that better than anyone.
Her dear husband may seem patient, but he wasn't exactly forgiving. Alberu had a nearly perfect control over his emotions; even those who committed wrongdoings against him to his face wouldn't expect him planning their downfall right before their eyes.
Alberu Crossman was not, in any way, a man to cross.
And (y/n) had just done the exact thing.
Fear gripped her heart like a vice.
She knew Alberu wouldn't hurt her. Be it physically or socially. Alberu might be ruthless to his enemies, but she'd been with him for years. His love (if there would still be any left after this...) wouldn't guide him to inflict harm on her. He would be angry, perhaps, but he wouldn't lay a hand on her. She was sure of it.
But to see and receive his disappointment?
It would be the greatest pain and punishment.
And I deserve it, she told herself.
(Y/n) flinched when she heard Alberu's chair creaking and felt him moving away.
This is it. This is the end.
Her effort to keep her tears in, so as to not appear as though she was begging for sympathy, was starting to fail.
He'll ask who occupies my heart when it's supposed to only be him.
He'll find out about young master Cale and it will ruin their relationship.
This will ruin everything.
(Y/n) bit her lower lip to hold back a sob.
I'm ruining everything.
The moment a tear escaped and slid down her cheek, she felt a pair of familiar arms engulfed her in a warm embrace.
Her eyes snapped open.
"Please don't cry, love," Alberu murmured, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head. One of his hands was gently pressing her head to his shoulder, while his other arm held her close.
His soft words broke the dam she worked so hard on building.
(Y/n) cried.
——————————
Alberu gently brushed his thumb on (y/n)'s tear stricken cheek.
When (y/n) started breaking down, Alberu teleported both of them to the privacy of their bedroom, away from any prying eyes or ears. He knew that his dear wife would feel better this way.
He held onto her as she cried her heart out, her mouth spewing out apologies after apologies, blaming herself and begging for his forgiveness. He replied to each of them softly, telling her that there was nothing to forgive, asking her to not put any blame on herself. It was a futile attempt as the tears kept streaming down her face.
When her body trembled with each sob, Alberu would tighten his arms around her, as if reminding her that he was there for her and he wasn't going anywhere.
Her cry truly broke his heart.
As her cry began to subside, Alberu guided her to sit on the edge of their bed.
(Y/n)'s eyes were red and she still trembled slightly, but the tears no longer rolled down her cheeks.
Alberu reached for the jug of water that was always available beside their bed and poured a cup, giving it to the worn-out young Empress and urging her to take a sip.
After ensuring that she was indeed drinking the water, Alberu rubbed his face tiredly.
"(Y/n), love..." Alberu started with a sigh. He noticed how (y/n) cowered at his sigh and quickly spoke, "I'm not angry. I promise."
(Y/n) didn't react, but he could see her grip on the cup tightening. He reached for the cup and gently took it away, placing it on the nightstand.
Alberu knelt down in front of her and took her hands in his, pressing a kiss to her knuckles the way he did in the greenhouse.
"It's not your fault," he said once again.
He could see (y/n) starting to waver again.
"...how is it not my fault?" She finally spoke, her voice hoarse.
"I broke my vow. I cheated on you."
Alberu shook his head.
"You didn't cheat on me, (y/n)."
(Y/n)'s eyes snapped up quickly, "And how do you know that?"
The Emperor reached a hand to brush a strand of hair away from her face.
"It's Cale, isn't it?"
This time, he didn't pretend not to notice her flinching.
"Y-You knew...?"
Alberu sighed once again.
"It's my fault, actually," Alberu mumbled.
"Wha- No! How is it your fault?!" (Y/n) asked incredulously. "Alberu, you're the best husband anyone could ever ask for! It's my fault that my heart easily swayed away!"
"First of all," Alberu quickly cut her off when she was going to speak up again, "even if there was any infidelity, it was never only one party's fault, okay? It, ah, how did Cale phrase it? It takes two to dangle? No, to tango?"
"But-"
"And second," Alberu cut her off again, "this is actually both mine and Cale's fault. And not in the way that you're thinking about."
(Y/n) blinked once.
"What do you mean?"
Alberu raised from his position and sat beside (y/n), shoulders touching.
"How do I explain this..."
——————————
A few months before the annual celebration...
Alberu didn't even lift his head when he felt the telltale of familiar mana manifesting in his office.
"What is it this time?" He asked with a deadpan, still focusing on his work.
The Southern region still suffers from the last drought... Southeast more so than Southwest. Is Marquis Ailan's faction acting up again?
He scoffed at the thought. Really, even after his ascension to the throne some nobles still wriggled like worms in his path. When would they learn to give up?
With a click of his tongue, Alberu wrote down a few notes to talk about the Southern region at an upcoming nobles meeting. Now that Antonio Gyerre was the Duke who supported Cale and, by extension, Alberu, making sure the Southern region was properly taken care of was easier than before.
Once he finished writing the points he was going to discuss (read: attack) with the nobles, he finally realized something was off.
It was quiet.
Alberu lifted his head.
As he thought, the one responsible for the mana was his dongsaeng. Well, it was actually Eruhaben, but definitely at Cale's request. Which was also weird, because normally it would be Raon who teleported Cale. The young Dragon took pride in taking care of his weak human, after all.
Usually, whenever Cale visited him, he would sit down and munch on Alberu's cookies immediately. Most of the time he'd also shower Alberu with useless compliments and act so rudely that older generations would have a heart attack if they were to witness it.
At least one of his kids would also tag along, most often Raon who was responsible for teleporting him. The kids were always loud and full of chatter. Not that Alberu mind, he enjoyed watching the children being children, supplying them with endless amounts of desserts in meantime.
So for the room to be this quiet when his dearly beloved sworn brother was there, well... Something must be wrong.
Cale stood in the middle of the room silently, eyes downcast and very noticeably alone. None of his children or his allies were with him. Alberu could see the faint glimmer of golden dust about to dissipate, proving that the Ancient Dragon was indeed the one who sent Cale there.
Alberu quickly put down his pen.
"Cale? Are you okay?" Alberu asked, worry evident in his voice.
"...hyung."
Cale's weak voice alarmed Alberu.
He'd never heard Cale this defeated before.
Something must be very, very wrong.
Alberu immediately rose from his seat and briskly walked towards his sworn brother. The moment he laid a hand upon the red haired young noble's shoulder, Alberu could feel him tensing up.
"Cale, what's wrong? Did something happen?"
Cale opened his mouth, as if to say something, but a moment passed with nothing said and he shut his mouth again.
Frowning, Alberu gently led Cale to sit on the sofa. Once he was seated, Alberu went to the cupboard on one side of the room. Just like in his bedroom, there were simple magic cooking devices underneath it. With practiced moves, Alberu brewed a tea he always drank whenever he felt stressed.
Alberu couldn't see it because his back was towards Cale, but Cale was looking at him. A million thoughts seemed to run in his mind as he tried to decide how to tell his hyung the conflict waging war in him.
Not long afterwards, Alberu set down a cup filled with freshly brewed tea in front of Cale.
Cale reached for the tea and took in the sweet fragrance of lavender.
"Are you okay?" Alberu quietly asked as he sat in front of the ex-Commander.
"...yeah."
"You're not hurt or dying, are you?" He asked again, just to be sure. His sworn brother was known for his lack of self preservation after all.
"What? No."
The young Emperor let out a small, relieved sigh before getting alert again.
"Wait, is someone else hurt or dying?" He hurriedly asked.
Because while Cale showed little care towards himself, his love towards his friends and family was even greater. If Cale was this distraught... could it be-?!
"No, hyung-nim, no one is hurt or dying."
"Oh, thank goodness," Alberu leaned back towards the sofa, adopting a relaxed stance. Being in Cale's presence was truly one of those rare occasions where he could let his guard down.
Silence engulfed the room for a moment, and it wasn't for a lack of trying to fill said silence. Cale's lips repeatedly parted, words already on the tip of his tongue, before he decided against uttering what ailed him again and again.
It was Alberu who finally broke the silence, a few moments after observing the younger man in front of him struggling.
Let's just talk about something else, he thought.
He'll tell me when he's ready. I shouldn't force him. Time to distract him, then.
"So," Alberu started, taking a sip of his own tea, "what have you been up to? I haven't seen you in, what, a month? More?"
His own plan backfired as he noticed Cale visibly flinched at his question.
Alberu put down his teacup with a light clink.
Something happened this past month. May have something to do with me. There was no report of out-of-the-norm activities around Forest of Darkness or Henituse territory, and I was the only person in Cale's circle not to meet him this past month. The one who lives in Roan, at least.
He frowned.
Mm, didn't I call for him a few weeks ago? And he said he had something to do? Did something happen then?
One of his fingers traced the lip of his cup absentmindedly.
But Cale isn't someone who kept important things from me. Not when it concerns me, at least. I can trust him on that.
Come to think of it, I called for him three times this month. He always refused, a lot of excuses. Believable ones, but isn't it a bit suspicious? Is it something serious?
...Or was he just avoiding me? But why?
"Cale."
"...yes?"
"Were you avoiding me?"
Flinch.
Alberu pursed his lips. Right on the head, huh?
Now, normally, Alberu would straight on go to teasing mode. He'd plaster on the fakest smile he could muster and let an abundance of the slickest, most extravagant praises roll off his glib tongue, unnerving the young master to the point of confession.
But Cale was not just unnerved. He was scared.
That flinch was very alarmingly visible.
And as annoying as his dongsaeng was, Alberu still loved that little gremlin. He cared for this sacrificial transmigrator more than he would admit.
"It's okay if you are," he finally said with a sigh.
Cale's eyes immediately went towards Alberu.
"...What?"
Alberu scoffed.
"Cale, you're one of the only people I trust with my whole life. I trust you and your decisions. I just wish to know the reason behind it. Did I do something wrong?"
When Cale still didn't dare voice his reason, Alberu spoke again, "And I also know that if you really don't want to tell me, then you won't be here. But here we are. Eruhaben-nim pushed you, didn't he? That's why he was the one who teleported you, not Raon."
This was definitely one of those times Cale cursed the perceptiveness of his sworn brother.
"Take your time, though. If Eruhaben-nim sent you here alone, then I assume we have a lot of time."
Alberu pushed a jar of cookies closer to Cale.
"I just restocked your favorite, by the way. There's more tea in the teapot, help yourself. I'll finish up today's paperwork and we'll talk when you feel like it."
Alberu stood up and stretched a bit.
"Will you stay over for dinner? I'm sure (y/n) will be happy to have-"
"No!"
"-you?"
Cale quickly looked away, as if he didn't mean to shout and cut off Alberu's words. Too late though, the damage was done.
"Wait..." Alberu pulled a face, "Is your problem with (y/n) and not me?"
Cale winced.
"No? I don't have a... problem with anyone..." Cale answered very convincingly.
Alberu deadpanned.
"You know, for someone who is incredibly good at acting, you suck at lying."
"No I'm not."
"Mhm. Whatever helps you sleep at night, dongsaeng."
When Cale only pouted (and that was honestly adorable, Alberu had to admit that), Alberu plopped back down to the sofa. His adorable dongsaeng was finally feeling like talking, how could he miss this chance?
"So," he started, leaning forward slightly, "enlighten me, dear dongsaeng, of what my wife could've done to make you avoid me or, well, her."
Alberu nearly cursed himself when Cale once again flinched and turned away.
I said something wrong again?! Oh dragons almighty (y/n) love what did you do to this guy?
Should I just call her here? Maybe Cale wants to talk to her without me here?
Before he could ask if he should call (y/n), Cale's voice interrupted him.
"Whatever you're thinking about right now, stop it. I-I'll talk. To you. Just you."
Alberu leaned back, fingers interlacing on his laps, and watched Cale take a deep breath.
"Hyung."
"Yes, dongsaeng?"
"I... I like-" He slightly choked on the beginning of the name, "I like... I like-!"
"Hey, Cale, calm down, it's okay," Alberu hurriedly said as he witnessed Cale struggling with his words.
The poor young master's face was flushed, either with embarrassment or frustration. Had Alberu not known better, he would've thought that Cale caught a fever. What did the ex-Commander like for him to struggle so much in admitting?
Alberu paused.
Wait a second...
If he only wants to tell me about it... Then...
Alberu sucked in a surprised breath, his face starting to flush as well.
Oh shit. That explains why he doesn't want (y/n) here.
"Cale..." He started, voice a bit strained, "I... I'm flattered, really, and anyone who receives your affection is truly one of the luckiest people in the world, no matter who or what they identify as. You deserve everything after all you've done."
Unsure what to say next, Alberu averted his eyes, missing the bewildered look Cale gave him.
"It's just... I... I'm married, Cale."
Once again, the room was filled with silence.
Alberu, with his skin flushed nearly as red as Cale's hair, couldn't look at Cale.
While Cale himself was staring at Alberu incredulously.
Both lost in either embarrassment or confusion, neither realized how Alberu didn't reject Cale's supposed feelings for him.
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So. It's been more than 3 months. And I have a good reason for it, which you can <a>read here</a> where an anon asked me about it. In short, during the last 4 months I received bad news after bad news that somehow never stopped, so I got way too depressed to find the will to write something.
This chapter is actually a split. I was going to combine both this and the next chapter, but it was getting too long and it's also been a long time since the story was updated, so here it is.
I can't promise when I'll update the next chapter considering, well, more bad news are still hitting me as I'm writing this note right now. But hey! It's supposed to be my late best friend's birthday today (January 3rd) so let's just say today's chapter is dedicated to him ;) still missing you every single day of my life, dude!
Oh right, if you found a pun in the story right where it was getting angsty then pls note that it was unintentional. I did laugh at it while writing when I realized tho.