Seven years later...
Just how fast the night changes, sabi nga ng One Direction. Five years ago, I got promoted as the Co-Head of Amore Clinic. A year after that, Dr. Chavez left me and Dr. Philip Santos to be the Head of the Clinic. Dr. Chavez is now managing Amore Clinic brach in Australia. Amore Clinic became more popular and successful.
But then, my heart isn't successful as me. Years ago when I finally accepted to myself that Brent will never go back to ask for my hand again. Nakakatawa nga dati kasi ang sabi niya, pagbalik niya papakasalan niya agad ako. That was a lie.
I stop following his Instagram account to not get an update about his life. I don't want to know how he's doing because me, myself know he's actually doing fine with the love of his life. And I should be happy for that.
Hi because me, myself know he's actually doing fine with the love of his life. And I should be happy for that.
Madalas noon, kinukwestyon ko ang sarili ko. Kung naging handa ba ako bago siya umalis, akin parin kaya siya ngayon?
And that's the most painful question that I cannot tend to answer. The moment I unfollow Brent's account, I disconnected myself from his cousins too. Sina Deo at Timothy, wala na rin akong balita kung ano ng nangyari sa kanila. I cut my connection to those people who are connected to him.
His cousin, his varsity teammates in Venrie, his friends outside school who knew about us. All of them. I start living my life with peace. Acel became a popular film Director in town and I am so happy for her because that's what she deserves. While Wyatt and Dr. Rhys Ferrell got married at Los Angeles 3 years ago.
And the most wonderful and special woman in my life also left the world. One of the thing she left was the frame she compromised before Brent flew away.
Our photo in front of the altar while we're all wearing red. I feel so guilty when she passed away because I wasn't there. I never did notice her visiting a Hospital for her monthly cheek up.
She had a breast cancer.
Everything happens for a reason. And those worst times of my life became a lesson and a motivation for me to stand on my own. To be a strong and independent woman. My faith in HIM became more powerful.
"Congratulitions Dra. Vivaldi,"
I smiled widely to the line up of Doctors in the hallway. They congratulate me, one by one.
Seven years.
Seven years before I became the most successful woman in our city. I pursue my dream career. I am now living my dream life.
Success. Peace. No financial problems. Free. And lastly, Happy.
I am Dra./Dentist. Shannel Angelique Vivaldi. At 26, I became successful.
"Doc! BGC mamaya, celebration!" Philip, my co-head in this clinic.
"Okay. G!"I responded.
I put my hands in my pocket and walk back to my office with a big smile on my lips. My smile slowly faded when I saw a 5 years old little boy crying while sitting on my office's bleachers.
"Hi,"I kneel down to see his face.
He was crying big time.
"Where's your parents? Do you have someone with you?"I gently ask while caressing its hand.
He look up me. Cute.
He pointed the front desk just a meter away from my office. I saw a tall man, with broad shoulders and muscle, with clean haircut, putting his hand on his pants pocket while talking to one of my assistant.
I turn my attention to the kid again.
"Is he your Dad?"he nodded after I asked. I play with his hair.
"What's your name?"I sit beside him.
"Eros,"he shortly replied.
"Okay Eros, lets wait for your Dad here together so you won't cry na ha?"
I pinch his cheek lightly. He start laughing cutely.
Ang gwapo naman ng batang 'to.
"Eros, come here."
My body stiffened. I felt my hands tremble after hearing that voice. I feel like my soul just left my body. Did I heard his voice right?
Did I finally heard the voice I've been missing, seven years ago? The voice I almost forgot how it sounds.
I slowly look upon the guy who was in the front desk minutes ago.
Our eyes met.
Like me, I bit he also did not expect to see me here.
"Shan?"
After seven years of suffering while building my own name, I saw him again. He is in front of me!
The guy who promised to marry me who love someone else while he's abroad.
He's here...my totga.
"Brent,"I greeted back.
His face lighten up and didn't waste a second to hug me... tightly. Like he has been waiting for this moment to come. Like...he didn't hurt me at all.
**
"Kumusta kana?"
After the awkward breathes and unbreakable silence...he finally asked how I am doing. And I'm bitting my lower lip big time I don't actually know what to answer.
"Ito, naabot ko na ang pangarap ko."
I saw how his smile formed.
"I am happy for you, Shan."
He look at me the same as he do before. But I can't feel the love and longing in it like I used to expect.
And also, to what he call me..
Shan. I am not used to it.
It's not love anymore, Brent?
"Thank you."I sigh deeply."How about you?"
"Well, I'm a licensed Doctor under my own hospital now."
Ang galing mo. Ang layo na ng narating mo. Malayo na tayo.
"Wow! That's good. I am proud of you,"I exclaimed sweetly.
He nodded and turn his full attention to me. Our eyes meet again. Those eyes who never meet for seven years.
Ganun parin ang pakiramdam. Para parin akong nakalutang sa ulap habang malalim ang tigtigan naming dalawa.
"The kid you meet earlier...it's Eros."
"Anak mo?"
He bit his lower lip. It's okay Brent, I've been getting myself ready for this day to come. You don't have to worry.
He was about to answer when Eros, the kid called him.
"Papa!"
And that's when I learned myself, it was really his son. Okay yun, finally masaya na siya. Masaya na siya sa nabuo niyang pamilya.
Seven years ago pa naman yung lahat ng nangyari, malamang ay ibinaon niya na sa limot ang lahat.
"I'm happy that we met again Shan, see you around."
I smile in pain. Feeling my heart beating so fast. Hindi ko na inasahang babalik pa kaya nagulat ako na bigla kaming nagkita.
It was Seven years.
I waited for him the whole seven years. He waited for me longer than I waited for him but I did stop assuming that things will be okay and he will still come back.
Ngayon...nakabalik na siya.
Pwede na sana...handa na ako, kaso may pamilya na.
Sayang. Nasayang lang lahat.
Akala ko dati noong tuluyan ko siyang binura sa sistema ko ay magiging maayos ako kung nagkapamilya nga sya dun kay Annie.
Siguro ang saya na niya. I really bet he had been happy for the past years while I'm broke waiting for him to come back.
Muli kong nilagok ang isang baso ng tequila at hinarap si Acel. Tinuturo turo ko ang baso na para bang si Brent ito.
"Anong akala mo? Madaling mag-move on? Bakit ako ba ikaw ha? Porque naka move on kana nakakaya mo nalang ngitian ako na parang hindi moko iniwan sa ere?"
"Shan tama na yan.."Acel tap my back
Inilingan ko si Acel."Hindi e, ang sakit-sakit parin dito e,"tinuro ko ang puso ko.
"Naiintindihan kita.."
Muli ko sanang lalagukin na naman ang isang basong hiningi sa bartender nang mapatigil ako sa pagtunog ng cellphone ko.
My eyes widened and the drunk me inside suddenly gone. There was a notification from my Instagram.
You have a message request from Brent Gimenez.
Napalunok laway ako at nag-angat ng tingin sa pinsan ko. Totoo ba 'to o dala lang sa kalasingan ko. But my breath gone heavy when I click the message and read it.
@brnte.gmnz:
Are you free tomorrow? Can we meet at Trish's? I have a lot to say.
Lumakas ang kalabog sa puso ko at unti-unting naramdaman ang luhang tumulo na naman sa mga mata ko.
"Wala naman na sigurong pag-uusapan diba?" nilingon ko si Acel.
"You two need to talk. Shan, he love you for years...we can't assure if he did stop. Baka gusto mag-explain nung tao tsaka....sayang ang friendship ninyo."
Friendship.
There we go.
Kaya ayaw kong magmahal ng kaibigan e. Kasi kapag naghiwalay kayo at nagkasakitan, hindi na maibabalik ang dating friendship na nabuo niyo.
It will be really really hard.
I chuckled and look at my phone again when it beeped another message...from him.
Nanlaki ang mga mata ko at napaawang ang bibig ko sa sunod na mensahe niya. Napatulala ako at nabitawan ang cellphone.
@brnte.gmnz:
I miss you.
Kahit pa sa sobrang kalasingan ko kagabi ay hindi nawala sa isipan ko ang mensahe ni Brent. Kahit pipikit-pikit na ang mga mata ko ay pumapasok ito sa isip ko na tila ba ayaw akong patulugin.
I did not reply.
At hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit pa siya magpapaliwanag. Kasi kahit magpaliwanag pa siya, hindi naman na siya babalik pa sa'kin.
Magpapaliwanag lang pero hindi babalik. Para saan pa diba?
I prayed to all saints that night to not cross our paths again the next day but then maybe, I am weak to them.
KINABUKASAN, hindi pa ako nakakarating sa Clinic ay nakatanggap ako ng tawag kay Dra. Nisca na kunin ang naiwang cellphone niya sa kaniyang condo.
Hindi na kasi siya makaalis dahil marami siyang kliyente.
After getting her phone, I automatically went outside because I'm running out of time but then when I was about to lock the door...I saw him. And our eyes meet again.
I almost forgot that he also lives here. Magkatabi lang ang unit nila ni Nisca.
"Hi,"he bit his lower lip as if he don't know what to do.
"Hi.."I acted cool even though I'm dying inside having an eye contact with him.
Ano pabang itinatayo-tayo ko rito kung pwede naman na akong tumakbo paalis?!
I nodded at him as I fake a smile.
"Sige, alis na ako."I was about to turn my back from him when he suddenly grab my hand that caused me getting out of balance.
Mabuti nalang at nasalo niya ako at nakakapit ako sakanya.
Wait..no, hindi yun mabuti.
I did not waste any second and stood fiercely. I didn't dare to look at him too, I just turn and walk away.
But then, he suddenly speak up that made me stop from walking.
"Mahal parin kita."
Nagsitayuan ang mga balahibo ko at napahigpit ang hawak ko sa aking bag. Anong sinabi niya!?
I sighed. Wala yun Shan, guni-guni mo lang yun. Lalakad na naman sana ako nang muli na naman siyang magsalita. But this time, ramdam ko ang sarili kong nanghina sa sinabi niya.
"I still do, love. Please hayaan mo akong mag-explain.."he said.
Tumulo ang luha ko at inilingan ang sarili. Hindi, hindi pwede. I slowly turn to him. I saw how his expression changed when he saw me crying.
His face sadden. Controlling himself not to walk towards me.
"I'm really really sorry for everything. Please hear me out...kasi mahal talaga kita. Hindi ako tumigil..love.."
I shook my head, my heart is aching so bad."You can't say that you still love me because you have a family, Brent."
Kumunot ang noo niya."Family?"
Gago ka ata e.
"N-naguguluhan kalang. Hindi kaba naaawa sa a-anak mo?"
"W-what?"he exclaimed shockly."Mahal, wala akong anak."
I chuckled sarcastically."I never knew that you will changed this much. Bakit mo idedeny ang anak mo? What if Eros is listening right now? Anong sasabihin nung bata, ha?!"
His face softened. A smile escape from his lips as he slowly walk towards me.
"Huwag kang lalapit."
He did not stop. Nagpatuloy siya hanggang sa nakuha niya ang mga kamay ko. Tuluyan akong nanghina sa paghawak niya.
He hold my chin darely."His my nephew. We did not met for years...paano ako magkakaroon ng anak?" he asked unbelievably.
Nephew? Pamangkin?
How come? Bakit Papa ang tawag sakanya?
Hindi ko alam kung ano ang tumakbo sa isipan ko at nagpatianod ako sakanya papunta sa Trish's. Natauhan lamang ako nang pagbuksan niya ako ng pintuan at naglahad ng kamay para alalayan ako katulad ng dati.
Tuyo na ang luha sa pisngi ko at sumasakit na rin ang ulo ko dulot ng pag-iyak.
Pumwesto kami sa loob ng café at siya ang nag-order para sa amin. My heart flutter after the waiter serve one plate of blue cheesecake together with a pair of Cappuccino.
Brent tried to reach for my hand so I place it away and pretend sipping on the cup. Ramdam ko ang lalim ng titig niya at ang sakit na dumadaloy sa kaniyang mga mata.
We were silent the whole time. Ang awkward at ang pait sa pakiramdam na ganito kami. We used to be so close, we used to be clingy to each other even though we're not in a relationship. And...we are together everyday. Mostly here, at Trish's.
Matagal promoseso sa utak ko ang inamin niya kanina. Hindi niya anak si Eros at pamangkin niya lang.
"Eros is Deo's. Nakabalik na si Yara galing Canada. Anak nila si Eros."
I feel like my whole heart drop for a moment. Kaya ba, hawig parin ni Brent kasi anak pala ni Deo?
Deo has a family now. Bumalik si Yara, nagkaanak pa sila.
Buti pa sila. Baka nga para kay Deo lang yung sinabi niya noon na babalik pa ang greatest love ng isang tao, kasi greatest love yun e. Para sakanya lang yun.
I cut my connection from his cousins, that's why I never heard about it.
But for that news, I still can't be happy enough. Sabi ni Brent, mahal niya parin ako....paano si Annie?