IT IS NEARLY midnight when Nesrin sneaks out of the Slytherin common room. She makes her way quickly and quietly down the hallways and up the stairs in order to get to the Astronomy Tower.
She hasn't been there since before she left school at the end of fifth year.
She soaks in the cool breeze indicating the start of autumn and revels in how it whispers sweet nothings onto her skin. There is an aching promise in its consistency. Something so dependable about the way there will always be this breeze this time of year, how it will never go away even when everyone in her life does.
It is refreshing, being out here alone this time of night.
The last time she was here, there had been an undeniable grin on her face as she stood beside a boy with hazel eyes and a devilish smirk.
When she feels ready to step out of this dream she has found herself in, she leans away from the railing and turns to walk to the door leading to the stairs. It isn't until she reaches the bottom of the staircase that she looks up and is just barely able to catch herself before she runs into the body standing mere feet away from her.
Her eyes lock with the same ones she had been just thinking about moments ago, and her heart somersaults. He stares down at her with a set jaw and an unreadable look on his face.
"What are you doing here?" he asks, his voice cold and emotionless.
"I..." Nesrin loses her train of thought as she follows his Adam's apple bob down once and back up again.
James clears his throat, and Nesrin's eyes shoot up to look at him again. She can't read the look on his face.
Her face warms as she stumbles on her words. "I was just going to the Astronomy Tower." Her voice is quiet. She doesn't know how James will react to those words.
She doesn't have to wonder long because not even an ounce of emotion flickers across his beautiful face. He is a brick ball, and Nesrin has to force herself to stop expecting anything from him when she doesn't deserve it.
"You can't be out here past curfew," he says. "Ten points from Slytherin."
She eyes the badge on his chest, glinting in the moonlight. Head Boy. She almost wants to laugh when she starts to wonder why in the world Minerva McGonagall ever made James Potter Head Boy.
She wants to ask him. She can't. They aren't the same as they used to be.
She blinks. "But—"
"You know what? Detention as well. Dungeons. Tomorrow after classes."
Nesrin furrows her eyebrows. "I—"
She doesn't even know what she was about to say. Thankfully, she doesn't have to think about how she would have made a fool of herself because James intervenes.
"Head back now. Unless you want me to take away even more points."
His expression is still inscrutable, so Nesrin takes a deep breath and then nods silently, brushing past him carefully so as to not touch him.
She barely takes two steps before a warm hand wraps around her wrist, an instant warmth wrapping around her entire being as if it were summer and she was laying on the sand, allowing the grains to paint her skin.
It's honestly ridiculous, the way he still affects her even now. Even after everything.
Slowly, she turns back around, hesitating for a moment before her eyes meet his once again.
Her entire body is hyper-aware of where his skin is touching hers. Where his palm is burning right into the place where her hand meets her wrist. Her heart beats rapidly.
They're both quiet as they stare at each other. Drinking each other in—really drinking each other in—for the first time in over a year. Nesrin finds that she missed James's intense gaze, his rapt attention solely on her. It always made her feel seen, special even.
A tiny flicker of emotion runs across James's face, but before Nesrin can dwell on that too deeply, he clears his throat and lets go of her.
Without a word, he moves past her and walks away without a glance back.
✧ ✦ ✧
AS SHE SITS at the Slytherin table during lunch, she immediately notices the way everyone around her is louder than normal, more excited in a way.
Knitting her eyebrows together, she sits beside her brother and faces him. His expression is indifferent, his body totally at ease.
She nudges him, and he turns his head to look at her.
"Why's everyone so chatty tonight?"
Idris shrugs. "Cosby's back."
She blinks at him. He stares back at her, the beginnings of a smirk tugging at his lips.
"Fuck," she mutters under her breath.
Idris doesn't make a sound. Instead, he turns back to his food and stabs the piece of salad with his fork before a group of Gryffindors pass by the table and he looks up to send them a steely glare.
Nesrin narrows her eyes at him. As if feeling her stare, he turns to look at her.
"What?" he questions in a tone that would be intimidating to anyone who isn't Nesrin.
"Stop glaring at them like that. They did nothing to you. Don't be a prick."
His eyelids drop into a menacing stare as his jaw flexes.
"They're fucking mudbloods. I think that's reason enough."
Nesrin clenches her jaw but doesn't make a sound. She just turns away and looks down at the full plate of food she hasn't touched.
She doesn't want to make a scene. Not when it means risking Idris finding out her morals don't align with his and their family's which means risking them finding out about what she is trying to do. She just can't. It's not like it would make a difference anyway right now if she stands up for them.
Idris will keep tormenting them, and his ideals will stay the same. He won't change.
Out of the corner of her eye, she sees the outline of a figure striding over to their side of the table and a number of hands clapping said figure on the back. Nesrin restrains a groan and pretends not to notice him.
Until he marches right up to her and plops down in the seat beside her, slinging an arm around her shoulder.
"Fadel! Fancy seeing you here," he smirks at her before eyeing her body up and down. "Damn, you got hot." He has the audacity to wink.
She holds back a grimace as she tries to subtly move away from him.
"Right..." she trails off uncomfortably.
He presses his body closer to hers and grins. "It's good to see you, Nes."
Nesrin clears her throat. "Good to see you too, Garrett," she forces out.
Garrett Cosby.
Only heaven knows the number of times he had tried to get in her pants over the years.
He had somehow gotten himself suspended before the school year started, so he hadn't come for the first few weeks. Now he's back, and Nesrin wants to shoot herself.
Idris suddenly stands from his seat and pushes his food away. He comes up right behind Garrett and pulls his arm away from Nesrin. Garrett stands and turns around in confusion but smiles when he sees Idris. Idris's face is impassive as he rolls his shoulders back so that he's standing at his full height—a good half foot taller than Garrett and taller than most of the other students at school—and clutches Garrett's shoulder.
Idris leans down and says something into his ear before leaning away, his hand still clawing at Garrett, eliciting a wince from him. The shorter boy swallows visibly before abruptly turning away and joining his other friends on the opposite end of the table.
Idris glares at his retreating back before he sits back down in his seat, not sparing Nesrin a glance as he continues eating his food.
Nesrin clears her throat and then looks away.
This is how they work. One stands up for the other and then pretends as if nothing ever happened.
Idris is an asshole nine out of ten times. But when it really comes down to what's important, Nesrin knows she can count on him.
Just not for something like being a spy in the Dark Lord's army.
When lunch is over and it's time to head to her next class, she grabs her bag and heads to the greenhouse. As she rounds the corner, she bumps into a tall, solid body.
Her belongings fall to the floor, her books scattered across the floor. She looks up, her heart immediately picking up speed.
Without looking at her, James lowers himself to the ground and picks up her things. Nesrin is too in over her head to help him. As he stands back up, he extends an arm and offers her, her bag.
He doesn't say a word.
Before she's able to formulate a response or reach forward to grab her books, a head of ginger hair pops up from behind James.
"Hey," she grins. "You ready to go?"
James glances at Nesrin briefly before nodding. He pushes Nesrin's things toward her again, and she takes them.
He grabs Lily's hand and the two walk off to their next class.
Nesrin isn't prepared for how much that stings.
𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿'𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲 !
guys. eras tour starts in 17 days. i'm not ready.
also louis tomlinson releasing a documentary?!?!!?!! ahhdssjkk