I nearly fell to the floor at the sight of my friend with a knife piercing his skull. Or was it a sword? The weapon tipped him at the nape of his neck, finding its way through his throat and pinching its way out of his mouth.
Blood bubbled out of Vince's mouth, covering the metal with a crimson red. His killer stood proudly behind him, twisting the dagger a bit more - dragging out Vince's torture. My eyes rapidly crossed the square - looking for Lotta again, but as my eyes landed on her, so did the attacker's teal gaze.
His smile grew as he saw Lotta approaching, killing her way through, clearing her path with death, barely taking her eyes off Vince, who still seemed to struggle, refusing to let go of that last bit of life he had left.
Some of his blood spattered on his opponent, but it was barely noticeable, mixing with other wolves' blood on his darker skin. Vince was just one of many.
Though the villain's amused grin told me Vince was about to become more than just one of many. He was about to become a toy for Lotta's torment - who was still making her way over.
The assailant was patiently waiting, holding his dagger securely in its place as Vince slowly but surely stopped struggling.
Two wolves near him were keeping him unoccupied - killing any who dared to reach out to him. And just before Lotta made her way over to him, he pulled out his dagger from Vince's neck and ducked down, narrowly avoiding a dagger Lotta had thrown.
Vince's body fell to the ground, leaving a light visible cloud of smoke from his last breath in this chill air. He never got up again.
The wolf who had killed Vince mouthed something at his two companions, and shortly after, all three of them disappeared into an alley - Lotta just reaching Vince's body and screaming out in pure agony.
But she had no time to grieve her loss, as she immediately had to use her dagger that lay on the floor to ward off another wolf, who came to attack her from behind.
I saw her wipe her face, before she got up, her chest moving in notable breaths, each of them fuming with rage. She was inhaling fury and exhaling vengeance.
She quickly disappeared to the side of the square, heading towards the alley the three wolves had run away to.
My mind was eating away at me. I felt powerless - I witnessed one friend die and another lose a part of herself she would never gain back.
And I was stuck on the sidelines, unable to move, with the gnawing feeling that I was missing something.
I knew the wolf who had killed him - he looked familiar. Every powerful wolf here looked familiar - Beckett liked to keep those close to him, but this one was different.
And the way the other two wolves defended him like it was their sole mission. It reminded me of my training in Apicya, where we were taught to always keep the gifted-
Shit. Sun burn me.
I needed to get to Lotta, now. She was walking into a trap she wouldn't be able to escape from.
And as the realization suddenly hit me - it all came together at once. He was one of Beckett's favored minions, one of the most powerful wolves in the pack. He had to be blessed by Agni.
And Vince's chilly breath I had seen - it wasn't an exhale at all. No one else showed their breath that way.
In his very last seconds, Vince had been boiled alive. And I had seen the fumes from his boiling blood. But why? What would he gain? Why would he use his powers on Vince, and tire himself, when he would die anyway?
Because it was all a game. As everything was in Fire Moon.
A game Lotta didn't know the rules of, if there were any rules to begin with.
Before I knew it, I ran out on the field. I needed to get to Lotta, to warn her, to keep her away from the alley - from her certain death. "Lotta!" I screamed, but I knew she wouldn't hear me. Not over all the other noise here. And even if she did, she purposefully ignored me, keeping her every focus on her new goal - avenging Vince.
But she had to know - she couldn't go after them, because if she went in that alley, she would never get out.
"Lotta!" I screamed again, my throat burning. I had just made it out of the street, the entire square now coming into view.
I didn't get far - I hadn't even reached the fighting - when a strong body suddenly slammed into me, and forced me aside.
I started clawing at my assailant - never letting that alley leave my view. Lotta had gone in, her daggers tucked back - no, no, no, no.
"Let me go," I screamed, kicking and beating at everything I could touch. "Let me go!"
"Sari, look at me," the voice said, but my eyes were glued to that alley - desperately hoping to see Lotta walk back out.
I didn't want to listen to whoever was holding me back - preventing me from saving my friend from a horrible death.
I kept fighting back, hurting every piece of skin or clothing I found, hoping somehow, in these next few moments, Lotta would magically reappear from the shadows and make her way back to me. But I was taken away further into the street, until I could no longer see any bit of the square.
Whoever held me, didn't let me go. They didn't hurt me back, either. Every punch I received, was one of my own that went astray.
But he was caging me - forcing me to witness another unbearable murder, when I could do something, I could warn her.
I finally looked up at whoever was holding me - and I was immediately met with green eyes. "Jerr," I breathed. "Let me go," I ordered. "I need to get to Lotta."
"Lotta can handle herself," he answered. "You need to go."
I barely heard him. And he didn't hear me. He needed to let me go.
"You don't understand," I cried. "She's about to die."
"Lotta will be fine," he said, his tone urging, desperate.
"No," I cried again, tears welling in my eyes and blurring my vision. "He's gifted, he's gifted, he will kill her. I need to warn her. I can't- I can't lose her."
"And I can't lose you, Sari," he pleaded. "I need you to get out of here. Lotta will be alright, I promise you."
"How can you promise that?" I sobbed. "There's three-"
"She's the Shadowed Death, Sari," he exclaimed, holding my face in his hand, his eyes desperately looking at me to listen to his words.
They slammed into me with a harsh coldness.
"What?" I whispered.
"She is, she's an assassin, and she's gifted, too. She can defend herself. I need you to calm down now. You won't lose her, but if you set foot on that square again, we will lose you."
"No," I cried, shaking my head. "You're just- That can't-" But I couldn't find the words.
"By the Moons," Jerr whispered, ignoring my confused words as his fingers grazed my mangled hand. "He said he got to you in time," he growled to himself, pulling me by my other hand as he guided us into a nearby vacant house.
I didn't know if its habitants had fled or died - but I didn't have the energy to think about that.
We went to one of the back rooms, closing every door behind us - so we would have more time to escape should someone find us.
My breathing had returned to me a bit when Jerr finally turned back to me after he checked if this house was truly safe.
My mind hadn't. "What's- what's the Shadowed Death?" I sputtered, quietly.
"She has been blessed by two Moons," he explained.
"That's possible?" I asked, baffled. Though, after everything I had discovered in the past hours, I didn't know why I was even surprised. I seemed to exist in a world I didn't even know.
"It's very rare. And separately, her powers are less powerful than average, but combined-"
"She's dangerous," I finished for him.
"For them. Not for us."
I nodded my head - it hadn't even occurred to me that she'd ever hurt me. I would never feel unsafe around her. I couldn't imagine that ever being the case.
"I need to get back out there - I need to help," I decided. Even if it wasn't on the battlefield, surely there was something I could do.
Jerr immediately shook his head. "No. You can't." His voice began to tremble.
"I need to do something, Jerr. I can't just stand here and watch people - my people die!"
He drew a ragged breath before he answered. "Sari, just the thought of something happening to you-"
"I will stay out of the fighting, but I could escort some humans, or-"
"No, I need you to leave, Sari. Please," he pleaded. "Get out of here."
"You want me to do nothing at all?"
"I want you to live," he said, frustrated. "Where did this even happen?" he asked, pointing at my broken fingers. "Look at you, Sari. I know you want to, but there's nothing you can do here to help anyone."
"That's not true," I argued. "I saved three people earlier. I can save more - I'll steer clear of the fighting, I promise."
"Sari, you nearly died earlier, when you steered clear of the fighting. You need to go back to Rahas and I'll find you there when it's over."
I didn't even take the effort to dig at him from looking into my head again - it wouldn't help anyway. "I can't- You don't understand, Jerr," I cried. "I can't be weak again, not here."
"You're not weak, Sari," he countered, grabbing my face again and placing a soft kiss on my forehead, careful to avoid the bruised spots. "You're anything but weak. Look at how far you've come. But you've barely escaped Fire Moon four months ago - you can't be of any help here, not today."
"I need this, Jerr. I can't flee to Rahas, not with everything going on. Benjamin just-"
"Sari, you can't stay here," he cut in. "If Beckett finds you here-"
"Aven's going to kill Beckett," I interjected.
Jerr cowered as he stepped back, his head shaking and his breathing subtly beginning to speed up. "No, he's not," he breathed, looking at me with big eyes, frowning with worry.
"What? Yes, he is. Lotta saw him - he's headed towards-"
"The Central Building," he said, finishing the sentence for me, his eyes locking on me, filled with desperation at an intensity I had never seen before. "Sari, please listen to what I'm telling you. Go, now, before it's too late."
"Too late for what?" I asked, taking a step toward him. My hand was trembling, but it still made its way to his face, wiping a silent tear away.
"Too late for what, Jerr?" I asked again, gently, after he deigned a reply.
"Just go," he whispered before his voice found its usual volume again - though it sounded broken and anguished. "Please. Get out of here. There's so much going on that you don't know about-"
"Because no one ever tells me anything," I bit.
"Sari, please," he begged, turning his face away from me as he hid it in his hands - before they made their way up and balled into fists in his hair. His lips were trembling when his eyes met me again - still that turmoiled look in them. He had frowns covering his forehead - a look I had never seen on him. He was in pain, though it didn't come from any physical wounds.
"What's going on, Jerr?"
"You don't understand, there's too much to explain," he breathed. "But I need you to trust me and go. I will find you when it's over, and then we can run away together. But I need you to leave now. I need to know you're safe. That he won't hurt you."
I took a step back - my heart beginning to wrench in ways I didn't want it to.
"When what is over, Jerr? Why would we need to run away?" I whispered though I feared the answer.
He refused to look at me. His tortured eyes fell to the ground, his head buried in his hands as shook his head.
"Why would we run away, Jerr?" I asked again, urging, but my voice broke.
"Sari, please," he begged again. "Leave this place," he whispered.
And then it clicked.
It had been him.
He had never been playing on our side.
"It was you," I realized, and as the words passed over my trembling lips, my heart and soul shattered into a million pieces.