TW: body image issues
I rolled over in bed and extended my hand, only for it to be met by empty space. I opened my eyes and saw that Chris was not in bed, nor anywhere else in the room. I groaned as I rolled back over and smacked my hand onto the nightstand and grabbed my phone. Unlocking it, I saw a message from Chris pop up.
MyDarkHeart: Good morning babe, I had to get to the studio ASAP bc Vin messed up something with his drums. I'll be home by 5 and you need to be dressed for the party by then. Love you
I sighed as I remembered the Christmas party tonight with the band, their dates, and the crew. I climbed out of bed, tied my hair back, and made my way to the kitchen to make breakfast. As the coffee brewed, I sat on the floor and snuggled our black lab puppy, Elvira. Elvira was found by Chris a few months ago on his way home from work. The poor baby was curled up next to his front tire and had been giving him the most pitiful eyes. Now, the poor baby was leaping out of my lap to go mess with the Christmas tree in the living room. Setting the tree up had been a lot of fun, especially since Chris nearly fell into the tree. It was decorated with a plethora of spooky and creepy ornaments and purple and green lights.
I was pulled from my reverie as the coffee machine finished and I picked up the steaming mug. I took it with me to the living room and put it on the coffee table before grabbing Elvira away from the tree and cuddling with her on the couch. As we cuddled, I sipped my coffee and watched Horrible Histories on the tv. I sat there for a good few hours before I realized I had to get up and get ready. I let Elvira outside to do what she needed to before placing her in her crate and then going to my room. I started by brushing out my h/c hair and putting it up into a simple bun. Then I went into my closet and grabbed the only red dress I owned since this was a Christmas party. I put it on and then glanced at myself in the mirror before I groaned. I didn't see how Chris liked this dress. It was a form fitting dress that seemed to accentuate every part of my body that I hated. I pulled at the material, hoping to make those features less noticeable, but it didn't work. I pushed and prodded and pinched my skin in. I huffed in frustration and glared at my reflection, feeling angry tears well up in my eyes. "Goddamnit" I all but shouted at myself. "Y/n?" A voice from behind me said. I turned to see Chris standing in the doorway of our room with a confused look on his face, which quickly changed to concern when he saw my face. "Y/n, babe, what's the matter?" He asked as he strode over to where I stood. I turned back towards the mirror and just glared at myself before saying "I don't know how you can look at me when I look like this.""What do you mean?""I mean just look at me. I'm fat and ugly and I hate that I look like this."
At this, Chris wrapped his arms around my waist and began to press kisses to my neck and shoulder. "Babe, you are absolutely beautiful just the way you are. You are not fat, you have curves. You have the body that most girls would die for. It hurts me to hear my angel talk about herself that way." I felt a few tears slide down my cheek as I folded my hands over Chris's. He stopped kissing me for moment and met my gaze through the mirror. "You are absolutely beautiful." He said as he turned me around and pressed a kiss to my forehead. I buried my face in his shirt and stayed in his arms for several minutes, just standing there in silence.
Eventually, Chris pulled away and smiled down at his me before kissing me again and said "I'd better go get changed and you need to finish getting ready. We don't want to be late." As Chris changed, I put my shoes on, added a touch of makeup, and grabbed my purse. Chris came out a few minutes later dressed in a red button-down and black pants. He took my hand in his and led us out of the house. He didn't let go as he drove to Ryan's house, and he especially didn't let go when we entered the house and were greeted by everyone else. The night was filled with laughter and Christmas cheer, and through it all I was thankful for my amazing husband.