request!
jimin can recall the moment that he met hoseok as one of the best moments in his life.
he remembers seeing hoseok's bright smile when he first entered their small college dorm room. he was a intimidated by how bright the boy was, but he learned that it was the best thing about hoseok.
hoseok was majoring in dance and music production and jimin wss majoring in dance. when jimin felt self concious about his body, who was there to reassure him? jung hoseok.
their similar interests and close bind they developed lead to their relationship. people called them, 'the cutest couple' because of their similarities.
—
"hoba, do you this dance outfit makes me look fat?" he asked, "no minnie, it doesn't" hoseok said, wrapping his arms around jimin, "is your dance exam today?" hoseok asked, kissing jimin's cheek.
"yes, i'm nervous" he frowned, leaning his head head on hoseok's chest. physical touch was his biggest comfort, especially coming from hoseok. hoseok always wore comfortable clothing and his body was always exceptionally comforting and warm.
"don't be! i know my beautiful jimin has got this" he said, giving a reassuring smile. it was a healing like smile that jimin found reassuring.
"i have to go to namjoon's, but promise me you'll eat after dance? or do i have to chase you down?" he teased, "i can eat on my own seok" he said, "good, i'm heading out now" he said, planting a last kiss on jimin's forehead.
—
"jimin, have you gone to the gym this month? perhaps at all this whole semester?" his dance professor asked, making the whole class laugh. he looked at his feet, "i try to go everyday" he said, his cheeks red and hot because of how embarrassed and humilated he felt.
"i find that hard to believe. your dancing was okay, would've looked better if you lost some weight" she said, writing something down.
jimin frowned, suddenly feeling all the weight on his body weigh him down. he felt twice, or thrice the size of his classmates.
—
feeling disappointed in himself, he didn't eat after his dance exam. he headed straight to his dance studio where he worked out and dance until he felt like he was going to throw up.
"o-one more time" he tiredly said, attempting to get up. he figured that if felt so tired after dancing, his dance professor must be right about him being fat.
the phone in his pocket began ringing, making him groan, he didn't have the energy to speak. he wss tired, his muscled ached, his throat was dry, his eyelids were heavy, he was just so tired.
"hello?" he asked, "minnie, have you eaten?" hoseok asked, jimin instantly sat up, "of course!" he said, putting on an energetic voice, "good! would you be fine if i hung out with joon for a bit longer?"
jimin internally sighed, "i don't mind" the boy said, "great! thanks!" and the boy hung up. jimin's glasses were foggy because of how sweaty he was.
—
"you're a really nice music partner" namjoon smiled, making eye contact with hoseok. hoseok felt butterflies in his stomach and his cheeks burn up like the sun, "t-thanks, you are too!" the boy smiled, "i think it's great that we were partnered up for this project, like finally someine who cooperates in work! also, how's jimin by the way? he's told you about me, right?" namjoon asked, setting his iced coffee down.
"of course he's told me about you! you guys met in high school!" hoseok smiled, "i think it's great he found a good guy like you. is he busy with dance? he hasn't answered me in a bit" namjoon said, "really busy. one could argue it's unhealthy for someone to dance that much" the boy laughed, "he's always been like that. it's normal for him" he shrugged.
"do you go to the gym? your physique is so nice" he smiled, gently namjoon's arms, the boy laughed, "thank you, yes. i try to go as much as i can"
hoseok thought that namjoon was just so handome.
—
jimin acted like he was not dying when hoseok got home. he took a shower so he didn't smell like sweat and he bundled up in the living room.
"hey seokie, how was it?" he asked, hoseok smiled, "great, we got a lot of work done!" he said, sitting next to jimin, "i'm glad, it's so cool that you get to work with joon" the boy smiled.
"do you want me to make you some food?" jimin asked, "i ate with namjoon" he said, "oh okay" the small boy said, he always ate dinner with hoseok.
—
in the span of just a few months, jimin began feeling like hoseok was spending more time with namjoon than with him, it was the worst feeling.
he didn't want to confront hoseok because he didn't want to be one of those guy's that restricted what his boyfriend could and couldn't do. he didn't want to be the mean guy.
it made jimin's insecurities consume him. he felt his reflection overwhelm him. his face was too chubby, the stretchmarks on his stomach seemed apparent and obnoxious, his hands seemed small and chubby, like the ones of a child.
namjoon was everything jimin wasn't.
namjoon was skinny, but buff. his skin was honey-like and mixed well with his physique. his face was thin and had a sharp jawline. he was masculine and confident in his masculinity. he was good at his work, whatever he did was amazing.
"i'm heading out" hoseok said as he put on his backpack, "where are you going?" jimin mumbled, "namjoon's apartment" he said, "oh, i was thinking we could binge watch your favorite shows"
hoseok sighed, "maybe next time? don't stay up for me!" he said, placing a gentle kiss on jimin's forehead. the small boy sadly nodded, picking at his nails.
—
truth to be told, jimin couldn't sleep without hoseok's comfort. he really tried to sleep, but the bed felt too cold and empty without hoseok.
how could he sleep when he ws stuck with his own thoughts? that was a whole nightmare.
eventually, he heard hoseok enter the room. the boy almost immediately flopped onto bed, "hoseok, cuddle me" jimjn mumbled, "i told you to not wait for me" hoseok frowned, "i couldn't help it"
hoseok gently wrapped his arms around jimin, ruffling his hair.
—
namjoon and hoseok only got closer and closer.
hoseok hated the whole idea and thought of what he thought what was hapoening between him and jimin. he feared that the spark they shared had faded.
when he held jimin's hand or kissed him, he no longer felt that sickening, butterfly-like feeling in his stomach. he hated the thought of that.
hoseok hated the thought of that because he could vividly remember being head over heals for jimin. he remembers the way his heart used to race when jimin walked by him and how his palms became sweaty when he was near him.
he went to the only person he knew could help, namjoon.
—
"joon, can i talk to you?" hoseok asked as he entered the boy's apartment, "of course, seokie. what's up? let me make us some tea" namjoon said, inviting hoseok to sit at the kitchen table as he began boiling water.
namjoon sat across hoseok as the water boiled, "i'm listening" namjoon said, hoseok sighed, "i don't know how to say this, but i'm scared that i've fallen out of love with jimin. i hate this" he croaked, shamefully looking down at his shaking hands.
the tall boy frowned, "why is that?" he asked, "i've met someone else who makes me feel warm and makes me feel butterflies. i don't think i feel that with jimin anymore and it makes me sad because i remember being head over heels for him" the smaller boy frowned, feeling hot tears stream down his cheeks.
namjoon wiped the boy's tears, "hoba, i think you should tell him. it's not healthy for you to force yourself to be in a relationship just because you don't want to hurt his feelings. besides, don't you think he wonders why you're distant?" he asked, caressing hoseok's soft hair.
the boy shrugged, "maybe he does, i feel horrible" he sniffled, namjoon handed the boy his cup of tea, "drink up, i know you'll be okay"
hoseok sadly smiled, "thank you. do you think i could live with you for a bit until i figure out living arrangements after i tell him?" he asked, "of course"
—
hoseok felt guilty when he cuddled jimin or when he kissed him. it felt like cheating even though he wasn't with another man yet.
was it really his fault he fell in love with namjoon? he felt horrible for falling in love with his boyfriend's best friend, but namjoon made his stomach tingle. any interactions with namjoon made him feel like he had fell in love all over again.
he prepared to say it. when jimin came back from work, he would tell jimin what he felt. he felt absolutely horrible.
—
"how was work?" hoseok asked, he was sitting on the couch when the boy came in, "it was fine, customers are mean" he scoffed, taking off his shoes and sitting next to hoseok.
"i need to talk to you" he said, jimin's heart began pounding as he turned to face him, "okay, what's up?" he asked, hoseok looked inside jimin's galaxy-like eyes and it pained him even more.
"in our time dating, you've shown me amazing things. you're amazing, really! none of this is your fault" he sadly sighed, "i-i've fallen out of love, i'm r-really sorry" he mumbled, he looked up to look at jimin.
jimin had the most pained look on display, "oh" he said, "that's fine, totally. i understand" he said, scratching the back of his head, "i'm really sorry" hoseok said, "it's fine"
there was an awkward silence until hoseok spoke up, "i'm planning on moving out so you can keep living at the apartment" he said, "okay, i'll take the couch while you move out" he sadly smiled, hoseok gave jimin a tight hug.
jimin enjoyed the last bits of that. he didn't want to let go. he didn't want to let go of the person who comforted him through his darkest times. he didn't want to let go of his personal sunshine.
he sniffled, but was quick to bite his lip, "i'm sorry. please find someone that takes care of you. please find someone that makes you happy. thank you for being so understanding, you have no clue how terrified i was. i hope we can still stay friends"
jimin nodded, "it's okay" he bit his lip.
—
jimin headed out the house at around 8pm. he was tired of holding in his tears as hoseok grabbed what belonged to him and packed into boxes. ocassionally, namjoon would help carry them to his car and flash him a sad, sympathetic smile.
he went to seokjin's house. seokjin had the best alcohol stash. he rarely drank alcohol, but all he wanted was a remedy to everything he was feeling.
—
seokjin popped open a bottle of soju for the boy, making sure to do a cool trick in hopes of cheering the boy up.
"so, why the rare alcohol appearance?" he asked, jimin sighed, chugging down some of the strong, bitter drink, "hoseok broke up with me"
seokjin gasped, "wait, let me get some wine" he said, rushing up to open a bottle of fine wine. jimin waited, he didn't care about anything at this point, he drank some more soju.
the older boy poured himself wine into a glass cup, "why?" he asked, taking a small sip, "he said he fell out of love" he croaked, tears brimming in his eyes.
jimin chugged down some more soju like it was water, "tell me hyung, why? was i just never enough?" he cried, seokjin frowned, "oh jiminie, don't think like that"
"how can i not? i'm pretty sure he also fell out of love with me because of namjoon" he cried, pulling his knees to his chest. seokjin immediately went in to hug him.
he caressed his back and hair as the boy cried, "it hurts here, make it stop" he sobbed, clutching a fistful of his shirt, seokjin felt like he was the one that was heartbroken.
he didn't want to blame hoseok, but he felt horrible seeing jimin cry like this, "you're going to be okay" he said, jimin shook his head, "i'm not! namjoon is everything i'm not! he's p-pretty, n-nice, c-comforting, and useful" he cried, "you're all of that and more, don't down talk yourself"
the small boy cried, "get me another bottle, i don't want to feel anything"
the boy had lost his love to his best friend.
—
stay safe and healthy! drink water and eat some food! sorry for any mistakes, i love you all! qotd: how do you feel about this not having a happy ending?