Unedited.
Chapter Thirty-Six
What does one do before going off to battle? Spend time with loved ones. Go over plans in hope of success. Check weapons and other various tools of the trade. Relive happy memories as to not be dragged down by the fact one's life might end soon.
That question was going through every Elite's mind and I knew most of them were doing exactly what I imagined they should be.
I, on the other hand, was busy staring at the wall in my bedroom. It was covered in photographs. Some old, some new; the faces I knew by heart. The smiles, the faded laughter rang in my head reminding me how easy my life once was. And what I'd lost.
Three of my friends were dead and Caelus was threatening the rest. My father. My uncle. Allie. Schylar. The threat couldn't go unanswered. No matter what the Gods decided, I already had my mind made up. I knew what I was going to do and my decision had my life lines flowing across my skin in gentle waves. They were keeping me centered, calm. Restraining me, keeping me still where I sat at the end of my bed and not allowing me to explode into action against the coming threat.
Violence was in me and it was clawing to get out.
I wanted to let it out.
I closed my eyes and dropped my head into my hands.
Everything was weighing me down, hunching me over. Like snapshots, moments of my life blinked in and out behind my eyelids. All the good and the bad. I couldn't make it stop. Even if my body remained still, my mind was racing to relive everything.
We are the sum of moments, of our actions in life, and the result of those choices would define where we go. My mother told me that once. I didn't understand until now as those moments flashed before my eyes.
I was the sum of my moments and I would do them justice.
*
"Dad?"
The house was quiet when Kye and I got back. I was a little surprised since Schylar was supposed to be here. My father wouldn't have been able to sleep after hearing Caelus' demand. With only an hour to the dead line, there should've been noise in this house. A tv, Schylar and my father talking, something.
Maybe they were downstairs. I galloped down the stairs and nearly tripped backwards when I rounded the corner into the living room. They were indeed down here but they weren't alone.
My uncle.
Cecil's parents.
Allie plus Allie's parents.
Bev and Corey.
Jesse.
Caroline.
Chris.
Andrzej.
When my eyes landed on Cecil, anxiety settled heavy in my gut. He was leaning against the wall to my right, calm and cool despite the heaviness to the room around him.
There was someone missing. Union. Was he told separately? He was Elite and we were all commanded back to home base for preparations. Because of that, I was surprised to find those who were Elite here.
"What's going on?" I inquired, trying to sound sturdier than I felt. When it didn't come out the way I wanted, I held out my hand to Cecil and he took it.
No hesitation.
He pulled me in and looped our linked hands over my head, around my shoulders. With my back to his chest he whispered, "Your dad and uncle are telling the ones who didn't know about the Triplets." That explained the heaviness to the air. He brushed a kiss against my temple and I relaxed into him. "Everything go ok?"
"Not even remotely." I met Andrzej's eyes and tilted my head toward the kitchen. "We need to talk."
Cecil didn't respond, nor did he move. But Andrzej did. With a tick of his head, he replied to my request and started to head toward the kitchen behind the crowd. He paused when he caught sight of Kye waiting out of sight of everyone else in the living room. A range of emotion crossed my friend's face, from unpleasant surprise to hostility in seconds.
In true Andrzej fashion, he didn't make a scene but his distaste for the other wolf was clear. Andrzej wasn't leaving me alone. Not with Chris still in the room. Not with another wolf invading what he perceived as his territory.
Cecil sighed. "Damn werewolves. Why doesn't he just pee on your leg?"
Now wasn't the time to crack jokes but at the same time-it was needed. And I wanted to laugh. I did. I wanted to laugh until I cried because I needed a good cry at this point. It needed to happen before I snapped, had a mental break down, decided the world had to defend itself without me.
"Peeing on my leg would be unsanitary."
"Says the girl who still has traces of blood behind her ears. Whatever you did with the Brothers brought on a true vision."
I neither confirmed nor denied it but he knew the truth. His grip on my hand tightened the same time Andrzej's eyes flashed gold.
"Natalie," my father called to me. "Would you come over here for a moment?"
I didn't want to. Commiserating with my family and friends right now felt wrong, counterproductive somehow. But as I looked from one face to the other, I knew they needed me. There was a gaping, bloody hole where the Triplets used to be in our friend dynamic and the rest of them were looking to me to help them deal.
The duality of my life hit me once more. They were dealing with the girls' deaths while I was numb to it, in the process of avenging it.
"Nat," Schylar murmured. "Please."
They needed me and right now it mattered more.
"I'll take Kye to the kitchen," Cecil whispered. "Everything else can wait for a few minutes."
I didn't need to tell him but it slipped out anyway. "Thank you," I whispered.
He kissed me on the temple. "Go give them some hope. Then we'll go kick some ass, kill a few things. If we're lucky, we'll even bag a primordial god."
"Lucky us."
I kissed him on the cheek and we went our separate ways.
*
More emotionally exhausted than I needed to be, and half an hour later, I made my way into the kitchen. And to a different kind of heavy situation. The wolves were on different sides of the island, both sets of eyes glowing. A detailed, hand-drawn map rested on the island top between them.
Cecil stood on yet another side, facing me with a tense look on his face. His eyes were shifting from one wolf to another, left hand twitching. Getting in the middle of whatever they were fighting about wouldn't be good. For multiple reasons.
"What's goin' on in here?"
Cecil looked at me, eyes wary. "Pissing contest."
I approached the island with caution, glancing from one to the other before dropping to the map. "Yeah? 'Bout what?"
"How we're handling the field," he said with the two wolves remaining in a silent stareoff. "Something about territory and trust is my understanding. There's been a lot of grunting and growling..."
"And staring?"
Cecil nodded. "Eye contact has been a factor."
"What exactly is the problem? We've got-" I glanced at the clock and felt some sort of emotion: anxiety, anger, restlessness, fear rise in my chest making it hard to breathe "-about thirty minutes before I have to walk out onto the piece of land where I died with the actual person who murdered me." That got their attention. The glow in Andrzej's eyes dimmed as he met mine and then proceeded to drop them to the map. "I don't want to do that without knowing the plan. So if we're done comparing the length of our pee streams or penis sizes or whatever it is wolves compare, can we get to the part where you assure me there's a back up? Because if what I've seen happens, there's going to be a lot of monsters, between myself and the church where Caelus is keeping his semi-corporeal wife, and I can't hack them all down by myself. Even with Chris there with me. Three of my friends are dead and I've about reached my limit." I slammed my hands down on the island and all three of them jumped. "Get. Over. It. And focus already. People are going to die. Lots of people. And I don't want anyone else I love, or in Kye's case tolerate, to die. Because it sucks. Trust me. So are we done?"
"Yes," both wolves muttered.
"Fantastic. What's the plan?"
A chill snaked up my spine around the same time I heard set of boot steps enter the kitchen behind me. I stared straight ahead at Cecil who didn't look happy about the boy who'd walked in and who was now standing to my left, between me and Kye.
"Remember when we were kids and we'd play capture the flag? We'd use the woods to make it spookier and always made you and Cecil captains of the teams?"
My eyes snapped to Chris. He had my attention. "Point?"
"You're the flag," he said. "And you've already been captured. Since Caelus' terms demand you and I show up alone, I'll be the one getting you to home base, which is the church in case you didn't know, if the monsters come out to play."
"The monsters we're certain of," Cecil added. "Because Caelus likes to test people."
"That's it?"
"No," Cecil and Andrzej said. They exchanged a look and Cecil continued, "There's a problem. A cleanup team was sent to the field to deal with the leftovers of what Caelus did to the Triplets. The team was instructed to level the cornstalks, make everything visible to lessen the chance of a surprise. Caelus has erected a border. The Gods say no one may enter or exit the field without his consent."
"That is a problem," I muttered. "And it doesn't match up to what I've seen."
"They believe the border will be lowered once you and Chris arrive," Cecil supplied. "And once it's down, Zeus is optimistic they'll have a way to keep it down to provide back up if you need it."
"Then why were you fighting?" I asked Andrzej and Kye.
"The pack wants to help but Andrzej is refusing," Kye answered.
Ah. "Well, that's-when you say help-?"
"They want to enter the field with us," Andrzej snarled.
"No one is supposed to come with us," Chris put in. "You can't be there, none of you can-"
"You may be a member of her Guard," Andrzej growled. "But no one trusts you to protect her when it comes down to it. Cyrus and I will be there whether Caelus approves or not."
Panic lit me up for obvious reasons. If something happened to Cecil because he came to be my backup, both of us were screwed. I needed to talk to Andrzej about this. Now.
"And where are you planning to hide yourselves?" Chris inquired.
"The woods," Cecil said, pointing at the map. "Here. Since you'll be entering here."
"Close but not too close," Chris sounded like he approved. "There's a possibility he's expecting you to come with her. How do we know he doesn't have something waiting for you in those woods?"
"We've had people watching," Kye said.
"Elite too," Cecil added. "There's been no movement from the field or the surrounding area since the cleanup crew retreated." He sighed and looked at Kye. "And the wolves found something interesting in the woods north of where you'll come in." He pointed at a little square surrounded by asterisks. "The ruins of a church."
Ruins. Ruins? "Let me guess-"
"It's not that simple," Kye commented.
"Why not?"
"Because where the church is supposed to be, Caelus bent reality with the Between. Think of a coin," the wolf instructed. "One side, you have ruins. The other, the actual church. Now, think of flipping the coin, each rotation a minute. The church exists or doesn't depending on which half of a minute you're in. Since Caelus instated a dead line, the existence of the church on this side has become erratic. The pack has reported we're up to two minutes between each shift."
"Meaning?"
"Caelus will hocus pocus the church permanently into the Between once you're in it and open the boarders to let the monsters loose in order to keep anyone from rescuing you. Least that's what we're guessing."
Well shit. "How certain of that possibility are you?"
"Considering all he wants is you and Chris?" Cecil shook his head. "Hundred percent. He's going to do everything in his power to keep you there long enough to do what he needs to do. Tally, he's been hunting down the things he released when Gaia came out of the ground and storing them on the other side of the Between. That's why he waited so long to finish this. He needed them to kill off as many Elite as possible to put a barrier between you, the church in the Between, and us."
He was afraid. "Ce-"
He shook his head. Now wasn't the time to address his fear. "Which leads us to why these two were having their stare down."
"You need us to make a portal to the Between," Kye said. "There are too many things that could go wrong if you rely on the Gods to do it."
"The Gods insist there won't be a problem," Andrzej snarled. "They are powerful, after all."
"Not powerful enough to bypass Caelus' lock. He's going to shut it down once he crosses the church back over. He's the very definition of difficult."
"You're grasping at straws, desperate to be useful."
"We're here to help."
"You're here for penance!" Andrzej slammed his fists down on the island, making me jump. I'd never seen him this angry before. "And I'm not going to give it to you."
Even with Andrzej snarling in his face, Kye remained steadfast and confidant. "What happened to your family was wrong. A tragedy," he whispered. "The pack should've come to their aid. On the pack's behalf-"
A snarl ripped its way out of Andrzej and even Chris winced this time. Kye was crossing a line and all of us could feel it.
"Don't you dare say it," Andrzej hissed. "Don't. Or I swear-"
The kitchen dropped into silence as we all gave Andrzej a minute to calm down. I reached over, hoping to give him some sort of reassurance, but his skin rippled seconds before I made contact. Touching him wouldn't be a good idea right now. I'd set him off and we needed him to focus.
"You protect her so we protect her," Kye reasoned in a soft voice. "Let's leave it at that."
"It's not your job," Andrzej let out. "You have no stake in this."
"They do," I put in. "Their home, the Between, was overrun." Andrzej growled as if what I said was inconsequential. "You want them to go back?" I asked. "Leave you alone? Then we have to make it possible. We need to clear out the Between. We have to deal with Caelus and if the Gods can't open the portal, you're going to need the pack."
He turned to me, acted as if no one else was in the room, and said, "I don't trust them. Not with your life, not after what happened."
"I'm not asking you to," I whispered. "But you-"
"Why can't Andrzej open the portal?" Chris asked. "That way you don't have to trust anyone else to do it."
Kye looked pained and whatever he was about to say might make everything worse.
"He can't."
"Why not?" Chris asked.
"Making the portal requires pack magic and Andrzej-"
"Isn't pack," Andrzej finished with a cold smile.
"By your choice," Kye added.
"You're only making my point. The pack doesn't belong here, you have no chips in the pot."
"If they want to help-" he cut me off with a look.
"NO."
"It's not up to you," Kye said.
Andrzej growled, knowing Kye had a point. It wasn't up to him. In fact, I didn't know who it was up to. Zeus maybe?
"I say have them on standby," Cecil chimed in. It earned him a scathing look from Andrzej. "Hear me out. Have them on standby that way if the Gods are unable to create the portal, they'll be there."
"Too. Much. Trust."
"Did you forget who is walking onto that field with her?" Cecil reminded him. "You're trusting him with her life-"
"For a short period of time and for the record, his situation is different," Andrzej argued. "If he pulls anything, he's dead instantly. Perks of betraying his sworn duty. I don't have the same reassurance with the pack. All I have is their word and it's not good enough."
"Then I'll swear the oath, as will the pack."
"Whoa." I took a step back, shaking my head. "No. Hell no."
Andrzej's eyebrows rose, silently saying See? Even she doesn't want you.
"It's not for the reason you're thinking," I snapped. "Only Lycaon wolves are supposed to make the oath. We're already pushing it with-" I waved at Chris, still unable to acknowledge his part in this. "Put them on standby," I decided and Andrzej made an offended noise. "Let them be Plan B-or Plan C-whatever letter of the alphabet we're on. There's no harm in having too many back up plans."
"I agree," Cecil said. "If they want to be there, Andrzej, let them. Don't let your pride get in the way of keeping her safe."
"It's not pride, Cyrus. They've let me down before and I'm certain they'll do it again."
"If they do, they'll be yours to deal with," I said. "After all, you were named-"
He waved off the rest of my words before they were spoken. Had he not told anyone what happened in the Between?
"Fine," he relented. "But know this, if the pack screws up, I'll wipe their very existence from the face of the Earth and ever realm between. Whatever it takes."
"Agreed."
"Now," Andrzej turned to Chris "do we need to go over your part in this?"
"I'm to escort her onto the field and protect her at all costs, including my life. Simple."
Cecil hummed under his breath. "If you believe it will be that easy, you are mistaken."
"Look," Chris sighed. "Best case scenario, it'll be a short jaunt across the field. Worst case, the monsters are already loose and I'll have to spill their blood."
"She'll fight beside you," Cecil corrected and met my eyes. "She'll not cower behind you, expecting you to do all the work."
"I know her just as well as you."
Cecil's eyes flicked to Chris and for the first time I saw what everyone spoke about: the cold detachment, the warrior who would do anything necessary to see the assignment done. "You don't."
They hated each other. If it hadn't sunk in before, it did now. If we survived this, the fight between them would be soon after. I could feel it. A dark shadow fell over the room, Fate coming for a visit. Destinies would be made and fulfilled today.
"Natalie."
I blinked and the darkness was gone, the room flooding back to normal. I glanced at Andrzej. "I'm fine. But we need to talk."
He nodded once and glanced back down at the map. "It's settled then. Our plans in place."
"Get to it," I added. "There's not much time left."
"I'll let the Elite know what they don't already," Cecil said as Kye walked out the back door.
"Ce-"
He came around the island, ignoring Chris and Andrzej. His steps were matter-of-fact, precise. Strange as only a few days ago we were toning down how we felt about each other around everyone. Now it didn't matter. Not when he reached me and slid his hands into my hair. Not when his lips met mine. Everything went away for a while. Every worry, concern, every happenstance.
But as he drew back, I felt as if it wasn't enough. Not with everything looming before us. I wanted more time, more moments like the one we'd shared at the Schola before Caelus made his demand.
"Ce-"
"I'll be back in time to see you off to the field."
I grabbed his wrists, feeling his pulse under my fingers. "Promise?"
He kissed my forehead and held there for a few seconds. I was able to breathe in his scent, feel him when soon he'd be gone.
"I'll be back."
And then he was leaving, walking out the door without looking back. Why did I have a feeling he wouldn't be back?
Not in time. There was so much I needed and wanted to tell him but I didn't have the words to say them. The severity of what I had to discuss with Andrzej hit me as I watched Cecil's broad shoulders disappear in the fading dark.
Nothing could happen to him. I needed to make sure of it.
And Andrzej was the key.
*
When I made it up to my room to change, there was a long black box with a white ribbon on my bed. A blood red envelope was tucked into the cross section and when I opened it, the message was simple: Luck -K.
Kells was awesome.
An all black ensemble was folded neatly inside, something that allowed free movement but was durable enough to protect me. My "going off to battle" outfit. Sometimes it paid to have a clothes-savy patron.
As I got dressed, my shifting life lines caught my attention. How odd they were. How different would life be without them? Would anything be different? Yes, they were a road map, a guide to how we lived our lives but there were people who chose to ignore them. They let fate and happenstance shape their lives. I often wondered what my life lines would've told if I remained human. Would my future have been what I wanted? Would I be as good as my dad, a prestigious female golfer set to do great things?
I ran my hand over my arm, making the lines slow and stretch. One, however, remained still.
My straight as an arrow love line with one faint, knotted blemish.
It was a reminder of the last time I'd lost faith. That mistake cost me, dearly. I couldn't afford to do it again.
True north, no deviations.
No hesitating.
I'd never been destined to be anything other than who I was. Golfing wasn't in my future, this was. The Elite, monsters, and time. That was my future.
Someone knocked, signaling the end of my self-reflection. Good thing too as I was about to drive myself crazy. Before I even opened the door, I knew who it was.
Andrzej.
I let him in and remembered I had something to give him.
"Wait," I told him before he launched into whatever speech he was about to give.
For the past couple of days, maybe all week, I'd been putting off giving it to him and if we, he, was about to go off to his death, I wanted him to know at least one person cared about him. I pulled the box out from under the bed and held it out to him.
"Happy birthday," I whispered.
He stared at the box then up at me. "What?"
I bobbed it a little before repeating, "Happy birthday."
A frown crinkled his brow. "It's not my birthday."
"I don't care." I took a few steps closer and stretched out the package a little further, like dangling a carrot in front of a bunny. Humorous comparison. "I don't know when your birthday is since you won't tell me so-I wanted to give you something, anything. Irrational, I know, but-" I shrugged "and I would've given it to you sooner but I got kidnapped, then my friends died, and the meeting. Please take it."
Begrudgingly, he took it while muttering under his breath, "This is ridiculous."
Well, he'd called me his family, his pack. What did he expect? Then I hugged him, surprising him yet again. He stood frozen, we both did, for a few minutes. Me wrapped around his torso and him not sure what to do.
"I want you to know-" I started.
He interrupted, "Rakli-"
But I kept going, "-even though we got off to a rough start, you-I care about you. A lot." I hugged him tighter. "You need someone to care about you, Andrzej."
"No I don't."
"My poor emotionally stunted werewolf." I drew back. "You do. And you're in luck because I care. I'd ask you to stay out of this fight but I know you won't."
"Of course I'm not staying out of it." He put the present on the bed and faced off with me, arms crossed over his chest. "You're letting your emotions control rational thought. I'll be fine," he assured. "Promise."
"I've seen you die," I said bluntly. "Gaia showed me. Told me the only way to prevent it was not to hesitate. I don't know what that means yet but-promise me you'll be careful today. No unnecessary risks."
"You're serious."
"As a heartbeat."
He considered me for a moment before shaking his head. "I can't-"
"You will because the next thing I have to say will make you."
"And what's that? You can tell me anything and know-"
"I need you to protect Cecil."
I don't think he knew what to say. "Rakli-"
"Listen to me." I raised my eyebrows, hoping he knew to read what I wasn't saying. "I need you to protect him. You have to."
"It's not my job."
"You're right. Your job is to be my εταίρος. I protect you, you protect me. Being my Guard doesn't change any of it for me. But I need to know both of you will survive this and the only way I can guarantee it is if you are next to each other. Fighting together as a team. Back to back if necessary."
"That would leave you with the Abomination and I'm not about to trust-"
"I need you to protect Cecil," I implored. "It's important."
His eyes narrowed and began to glow. "Why?"
"I can't tell you. Not out loud where someone could hear. You're going to have to trust me and do as I ask. I know it's a lot but I need you to do this for me."
"Cyrus can take care of himself. As can I."
"I know but both of you are more vulnerable than you realize. Do this for me. Please."
He didn't want to and it had nothing to do with his former animosity towards Cecil. Tension rolled off him as the war between what I'd asked and what his duty demanded started. He paced, like a tiger behind the bars of his cage.
"You'll be careful too?" he asked.
"Yes."
"If he wavers-" Andrzej shook his head "-are you sure he will protect you?"
"He took the oath. If he breaks it, he dies."
"Leaving you even more defenseless." The shaking of his head became erratic. "I can't."
"Caelus-"
"Caelus had him murder you. Who's to say he won't-"
"That was before. I can't be harmed now."
"That we know of. We didn't have a chance to test that out. Not completely. Look, Rakli, the Projection room, the trees, that was practice. Even the short fight with the chimera was nothing next to what we're about to face. Something could happen to you and if I'm not there to try to prevent it-I'd never forgive myself. Cyrus would never forgive me and you don't know what he's like when he's in a foul mood. There's a reason he and I didn't get along before."
"I know-"
"You don't. It's not just me who'll be trying to get to you. He will too and quite frankly, everyone would feel better if we reached you."
"You can't come onto the field with me."
"Which is why the plan is the way it is. We're to get onto the field and get to you as quickly as possible-"
"I want you to stick to that, Andrzej, I do, but until you do reach me, I need you to protect him."
He sighed and sat down on the bed. "You don't know what he's like, do you? When it comes to fighting-Cyrus is a machine. He fights with a single-mindedness I've never seen before and I've seen a lot."
"So?"
"So protecting him is not going to be easy. He's not going to care about himself. If it protects you-"
"Then you'll have to protect him from himself. I know it's a lot to ask but I need the peace of mind. In order to do what I'm going to have to, I need to know you two will be ok. Please."
He looked at the present, fiddled with the ribbon, and said, "Alright. For this one fight, I'll do as you ask. But know this, if the Abomination fails you-"
"If I fail her, you'll be the least of my worries."
I let out a growl of frustration and whirled on him. He stood out in the hall, dressed in black as well. "Would you stop doing that?"
He held up his hands in surrender. "I'm sorry. Just came to tell you it's time to go."
"Right." I turned back to Andrzej who was now standing. "Remember what I said."
We had a moment of silent communication before he nodded. "I will."
"Then I'll see you soon."
This time it was him who initiated the hug. "Watch yourself," he whispered before releasing me to disappear out the doorway. Present in hand.
"Ready?" Chris murmured.
I grabbed the weapon Kells had chosen for me and answered, "What do you think?"
"I'll protect you, Natalie," he insisted. "I swear it."
"You understand why I'm having a hard time believing that, don't you?"
He nodded. "We don't need to go over it again."
"You do your job, I'll do mine, and we'll get along just fine."
"Ok."