McKennas POV
I finally left the apartment today. Tobey's taking me out shopping. Something to get my mind off things. I wore my baggy jeans and oversized jumper as it is now fall. I packed my face with makeup because I knew how much Leo loved it when I went all natural and right now I want to do everything that Leo hates. If you can't tell, I'm over the denial phase and on to the anger stage of the journey to acceptance. I was so annoyed at him for not telling me and for fooling me, annoyed at myself for trusting that he actually had feelings for me. Just annoyed at everything
"Why are you frowning" Tobey said as he glanced over the clothes rail in some random little boutique
"Just thinking" I plainly said. I looked over at tobey. He walked back and forth as he held his hands out to the row of clothes. He's definitely bored
"Soooo how's filming going?" He perked up. I think only because I haven't really spoken to him that much
"It's going good actually, it's exciting actually it's more of a thriller movie"
"That seems like fun"
"Yeah it's an-"
"Nuh uh uh, don't spoil it for me"
"Oh are you going to watch it now?"
"Yes ofcourse I want to watch a movie that Mr tobey starrs in" I pinched his cheeks as I started to head out of the store
"Quit that! Ok my lips are sealed"
"Good"
"Supposedly, we could go get something to eat? I'm starving and shopping is tiring"
"What'd you mean you haven't even bought anything yet" I playfully roll my eyes
"Watching you shop is tiring" he emphasised
We ended up seated at a small cafe. The city so busy and loud but being out with tobey was just so peaceful
"You know I'm glad we're not that known yet, feels so good not having to worry about people taking sneaky pics of us, whole different story when your with Leo"
"Hey it's not Leo's fault"
"Yeah but it makes it hard for any of us to go out with him without being seen"
"And when your music releases, people are going to be up in your face aswell" I kept quiet. We ordered our food and ate then started to head down the streets.
"Do you reckon we can stop by a convenient store real quick" tobey asked as we neared a store on the way home. I nodded and we entered through the doors. He grabbed what he needed and we lined up behind the counter. I couldn't help but scan over the magazines that were displayed on the racks by the front.
"Do you need anything" tobey questioned as he directed his gaze in my direction. I don't know what made me walk towards this particular magazine but something about it caused me to gravitate to it. I started flicking through the pages. My eyes stopping at one in particular. 'Are they official?' I scanned through the pics and saw one of Leo and Kristen. It looks like it was taken recently in Mexico, she must've flown over there to visit Leo. The picture was of Leo's arm around her shoulder as she leaned in to plant a kiss on his cheek
"Hey you ready to go?...oh hmmm" tobey glanced the page and saw the picture. He tried to take the magazine out of my hand but I only gripped harder "Kenna come on you don't need to see this, just let go" he said softly as I finally let go of the book. He placed it back on the rack and looked at me dead in the eyes.
That hurt to see so much. I started to get teary in the eyes. Tobey put a hand on my back and guided me out the store. He actually did that the whole walk home. When we finally got inside of our apartment the tears just started flowing. I couldn't stopped them. I guess I'm in the depression stage of the 5 steps to acceptance
"Hey Kenna, it's gonna take time I know it hurts but you can't waste your life dwelling on it, just try and move on"
"Tobey that should be me, I don't get it we literally told each other we were falling for each other" I was now hysterically crying. Somehow getting it all over my sweater.
"Oh I didn't know that... here I'll go get you another sweater to change into" he rushed off as I tried to compose myself. I really shouldn't be acting like this. Tobey came back as I wiped away the last of my tears.
"Here ya go" he handed me a yellow item. I unfolded to see it was in fact Leo's yellow sweater. I started bursting into tears again
"What's wrong do you not like the sweater?" Tobey said awkwardly standing there
"It's Leo's sweater" I cried. You can obviously tell that tobey hasnt had to deal with all this crying before
"Oh shit I didn't know" he panicked. Leo's stupid sweater still smelled like him too.
Wait sweater, Leo's sweater
I stopped crying and I looked up at Tobey
"Sooo do you want the sweater or should I grab you another one?" He said in confusion as to why my mood drastically changed
"This is Leo's sweater"
"I know I'm so sorry I didn't even realise"
"No this is Leo's sweater he gave it to me...hmmm"
"Ok?" I tuned out of my surrounding, tobey was now invisible as my head raced around
"I need my phone, omg where is my phone" tobey grabbed it off the table and slowly handed it to me
"Is everything alright?"
"More than alright" I softly smiled. I looked at my contact list. K,l,M,N Neale just the person I need to talk to. I pressed call and almost immediately Neale answered
"Hello Neale speaking"
"Neale you know how you said to call you at anytime if I come up with an idea for my song?" Tobey slumped back into the armchair and his eyes widened
"Aaaah Kenna my angel, yes I do recall saying that, is everything ok? You sound sick" I rolled my eyes, my nose got so stuffy from the recent breakdown
"I don't want to get into it..not now anyway. Neale I've got an idea, I have a song well not right now I just have to get the lyrics sorted, but I'm telling you, I'll have the music written up by tomorrow"
"YES GIRL!!, ok I'll make sure the team is in studio tomorrow, get writing. I can't wait to hear it"
"Ok bye I'll see you tomorrow" I hung up the phone. I looked over at tobey. I just look like a complete mess right now
"I'll leave you too it" tobey nodded i managed to fake a smile and walked into my room. My mind flowing with the lyrics as they came to my head.
A couple of weeks have passed now. Leo have now actually tried calling and texting me but I just couldn't find the courage to talk to him. Not after the hurt I've been through lately. I've been in and out of the studio finishing up on my new single. I can now finally say it's done. I was currently sitting on the couch in the living room. Tobey was by my side. I wanted him to be the first to hear it before it went live tonight
"Can you just play it for me already!?" He whinged as he grew impatient
"In good time, I named it 'Better'. I just wanted to say thank you for giving me the idea for this song"
"You're thanking me?"
"Yeah you'll understand when you hear the song"
"Ok well come oooooon put it on" I nodded as I brought the remote up to hit play
"Ok but like this song is a bit different to what yo-" tobey snatched the remote off me and hit play. The guitar intro echoed through the room as I anxiously looked around the room. This is finally it. My very first song release
"I still remember, if you can remember, me in your sweater
You said it looked better on me than it did you
But Only if you knew how much I liked you
But I watch your eyes as she
Walks by,
What a sight for sore eyes
Brighter than the blue sky
She's got you mesmerized while I die
Why would you ever kiss me?
I'm not even half as pretty
You gave me your sweater, it's just polyester
But I know you want her
I wish I were better
Watch as he stands with her, holding your hand
Put your arm 'round her shoulder, now I'm getting colder
But how could I hate her? She's such an angel
But then again, kinda wish she were dead as she"
"Ok then it kinda repeats the chorus again" I say. Tobey just brings out a finger and places it on my mouth to shut me up. The song finally finishes and I pressed stop
"So?" I say nervously
"Wow" he nodded, he looked at me with awe "you know this is the first time I've ever heard you sing, I gotta say I'm impressed"
"Yeah yeah and the song? Is it ok? Do you think people will like it? I mean it's a bit slow and sad but-"
"Kenna it's so good! I'm telling you this is only the start...but I gotta say I don't think Leo have had a song written about him yet" I swallowed, I hope he never hears this song. It makes it seem like I'm obsessed or something
"It's not about Leo pffft what are you talking about"
"Kenna I witnessed you waste away for a almost a month, I gave you his sweater and boom all of a sudden you have a song, it's just a coincidence don't you think" I just shrugged and looked away.
"Do you think he'll hear the song before the premiere on Friday?"
" I have no clue...come here this calls for a celebration!" Tobey embraced me into a hug. Now that the song is going to be released tonight all I could stress about is if Leo will hear it or not, what his perception of the song will be.
Night came a lot quicker than expected. It finally daunt me that the world will be hearing my song. I was currently at a very secluded restaurant in the city with Neale, music producers and Tobey.
"We're live baby!" Neale shouted as everyone said there congratulations and clinked there glasses together. I feel my phone start ringing. And looked down and saw it was Kate
"I'm so sorry please excuse me" I smiled as I walked off to be alone. I hit answer
"AAAAAAH" I held my phone away from my ears as Kate screamed in excitement
"Hello to you to" I softly chuckled
"You're song is getting so much attention right now, I'm so so so proud of you"
"Thanks Kate it means so much"
"But I got to ask is this song about Leo? Leo and Kristen to be exact?" She whispered, I didn't say anything
"I don't know why I bothered asking, Leo's the only guy you've been with really"
"We weren't together"
"Still"
"Um Kate?"
"Yaaaas"
"You didn't play it around Leo did you?" I questioned
"Oh no I didn't, but it's only a matter of time before he does hear it" I could hear the sincerity in her voice. I just don't want to know how he'll react to a song made about him.
Leo's POV
I'm so exhausted, I've been filming non-stop, having to deal with Kristen's shit and been trying to get in contact with Kenna but to my luck she's ignoring me. I guess that's what you get for being so distant. I've barely gotten any sleep. Days were coming by so slow, I just can't wait for the contract to be done.
I trudged back to my room, with my bag hung around one shoulder. I wonder what Kate's up to? I walked over to her hotel room and went to go knock. But to my surprise the door was unlocked, I slipped in without thought and saw her presence on the couch. She didn't know I was there. I wonder how long it'd take for to notice.
" I love it so much you should be proud" I hear her say into the phone "uh huh, I think it'll make it number one....oh for sure there's just so many listens already"
"Kate!" She snapped around and her eyes widened
"You talking to tobey?"
"I uh-no, no Kenna not you I'm talking to Leo...oh shit" she palmed her forehead. Was she trying to not tell me that Kenna was on the phone. I ran up to her position and tried to snatch the phone.
"NO LEO GO AWAY" she said as she tried to get the phone out of reach. She had her hand on my head. I just want to talk to her that's all I want.
"Please just uuuugh let me talk to her"
"No" she snapped, I thought quick and went to go tickle her, causing her to drop her phone. I quickly grabbed her phone and ran off to her bathroom and locked it.
"Kate what's happening?" I here Kenna ask over the phone. I could hear Kate bang on the door as she yelled at me for stealing her phone.
"K-kenna" I managed to say. She went quiet but didn't hang up
"I'm not doing this Leo, stop calling me"
"No please just listen I want to talk a-"
"What is there to talk about Leo?" She cut me off. I sighed
"There's so much I just need to clear up and I want to make sure your ok?"
"I'm far from ok at the moment...goodbye Leo" and with that she hung up. Oh I've really fucked up. I guess I'll have to talk to her at the premiere on Friday.
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A/N
Hey guys!! Just wanted to state that I did not make up the lyrics! If you haven't heard the song 'heather' by Conan Gray please go listen to it now 🥺 song really do be hitting me in the feels :( I just love the song so much! I did however change the lyrics a little to fit the situation better
Hope you liked this chapter 🫶🏽
Please vote 🥺🥺 much love ❤️