My smile was still firmly in place as I sauntered over to my bed, turning the lights off before I pulled the comforter over my body. It didn't take long for sleep to overtake me, with visions of veiny forearms, a chiseled face and a certain dark haired mafia boss making their way into my dreams.
***
I woke up with a yawn, the heavy drapes shielding the sunlight from entering the bedroom. It was still winter in Russia, but lately we had been receiving a lot of sunlight. I guess it was reflective of my current mood - feeling turmoil over so many changes happening at once while also feeling happy at the same time.
Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I went through my usual morning routine before showering and getting dressed. I descended the stairs, hearing several voices coming from the study to my left. The door was slightly ajar as I moved towards it, pressing my ear against the wall.
"So we'll keep the funeral today then, Pakhan?"
"Yes, but don't make it a big affair. Just a few important men at most."
"Alright, we'll get everything in order for it."
They continued conversing in rapid Russian as I moved away from the room, realisation dawning on me. They were obviously talking about Sergei's funeral -a thought I had conveniently forgotten about after everything that had happened yesterday. And by everything, I meant Alexei kissing me. Fuck. That kiss sent shivers up my spine even now, hours later. I shouldn't even be thinking about that and instead should've been mourning my uncle's death - after all, he had been the one to save me bomb blast and then gave me a home. But I couldn't help thinking that the previous day had been an irony in itself. Sergei's death had also led to a new beginning for Alexei and I. Talk about coincidences.
I helped myself to a simple breakfast of toast and jam, my stomach slightly plummeting at the thought of how Alexei was handling the situation. He very well couldn't admit out loud that he had been the one to kill the ex-Pakhan with his own bare hands. Nerves clawed at me as the voices from inside grew louder before silence finally ensued. I picked at a piece of toast as footsteps sounded from behind me. Craning my neck to look at them, I counted seven of the most high ranking men in the Bratva as well some well known politicians making their way to the front door. Some of them shot me solemn looks while the others openly ogled me, making me feel like I was a prize on display. Nikita was the last one to leave, sneering as I stood up to my full height, my resting bitch face mode in full force.
"What are you looking at? See something interesting?" I snapped as I tilted my head, looking up at him even though there was a considerable height difference between us.
"Oh no, just wondering what the Pakhan sees in a bitch like you. You must have a really tight pussy in order for him to -
Before he could finish that sentence, my knee came into contact with his balls - hard - as he groaned in pain.
"You fucking -
I cut off his words as I pulled out the knife that I always kept sheathed under my clothes, holding it against his pulse point.
"Disrespect another woman like that again, and I'll make sure you regret it. Remember Nikita, I'm in the Bratva as well. And nothing can save you from me if I decide to unleash my wrath on you." I stroked his chin almost lovingly as my blade pressed deeper, a trickle of blood oozing out. "Are we clear?"
The bastard frantically nodded his head before I released him so that he fell to the floor while clutching his micro dick. Trust me, I'd know.
I was sick and tired of everyone belittling me, coddling me even. Saying how I wasn't good enough to be in the Bratva when it was clearly male dominated and the only reason why I was allowed into it was because of my connection to Mikhail. Lies, obviously. I had more than proved my worth to Mikhail and had managed to handle and accomplish several jobs that had been assigned to me. Even my own cousin had begrudgingly accepted that I was an asset to the gang. Alexei was another one of those people that coddled me, using the excuse that he was only protecting me. I called bullshit. Him and I had gone at it many times over the past year, with neither one of us refusing to back down because we were both stubborn like that.
Nikita managed to get up with one hand before shooting me a scathing look.
"I can't believe I fucked you all those years ago."
Coincidentally, Nikita had been my partner on one of the assignments that I had done in New York. He had seemed like a real catch then - though that was probably because he was trying to get in my pants and had turned up the charm. It had worked back then. We'd fucked multiple times until I'd realised that he was a shitty lay. One that was so conceited and self absorbed that couldn't see past himself. Naive old me had thought that this was what sex was supposed to feel like - an itch that was barely scratched - until I met other men and became wiser.
"The feelings are mutual, Nikita. I can't believe I even let your STD riddled dick near me."
Nikita grew red in the face before he decided that I wasn't worth the effort - or maybe he was really scared of me this time. Either way, he took off and left the house, still clutching his dick and wincing in pain. I smirked as I turned around, in a much better mood now and ready to resume eating my interrupted breakfast. But Alexei's looming figure had me pausing for a second before I continued on over to my seat, pretending that nothing had happened.
"What was that about, milaya?"
"Nothing. Just putting another man in his place as usual." I said nonchalantly as I took a bite of my breakfast. "And before you reprimand me for hurting one of your men, let me remind you that you threatened to do the same not too long ago."
"I wasn't going to say anything about that." He said, almost amusedly as he took a seat beside me - well, at least as amusedly as the great Alexei Zakharov could get.
I froze for a second, stumped at the fact that Alexei wasn't going to boss me around this time. Well, no need for me to get defensive again.
"Are we going to talk about yesterday?" Alexei took the silence as his cue to speak as his eyes bored into the side of my face.
"I -
"Pakhan, we've arranged everything. It's time to go."
I nearly breathed a sigh of relief at the interruption, convinced that Alexei was going to bring up the topic of last night's kiss. Believe it or not, a small part of me was still scared that he would wake up one day and go back to his hot and cold behavior. That he would reject me again, despite his promise of giving us a chance and taking things slow. Was it stupid to be so hung up on a man who was emotionally unavailable? Probably. But was my traitorous heart going to listen? Nope. Definitely no.
Alexei shot me a look that said that this was far from over before he motioned for me to follow him outside. A sleek SUV was waiting for us near the door, several men standing guard around it.
"I presume all the important faces will be there?" Alexei addressed the man who was holding the door open as he nodded in response.
If my guess was not wrong, I'd say that we were heading to Sergei's funeral based on the somber mood.
Alexei took shotgun as I took the backseat. A man with a jagged scar running down the side of his face glared at me as I closed the door shut.
"Got a problem, big guy?" I questioned in fluent Russian as he made a sound at the back of his throat.
"Sofia." Alexei's sharp voice cut through the air, his face blank and his eyes cold as I read the unsaid message he was trying to convey to me. Shut the fuck up. I shut my mouth, for now, ignoring the others in the car with me as we headed to the location where Sergei was to be buried. Though something in my gut told me that it wasn't going to go as smoothly as it had been planned.
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