I kept my promise to myself and felt better every day that passed. The memories I had of him were fading and finals were coming. The cameras had stopped following me to class and stopped writing about me on their websites. Pryce and I were getting closer each day and I enjoyed spending my time with him. My internship with Marc and George was also coming to an end. I was still holding out for a full time paid job with them but was looking into newspapers around the city. Pryce was offered a copy editor position for the New York Times and promised me a way in once he was settled. I had put Harry behind me and was happy.
"How's that feel?"
"Good. Nice fit," I said to the student helper measuring me for my cap and gown.
"Looks great," said Pryce from behind me. I turned and smiled at him. I never realized how perfect we were for each other even though there was still the smallest tug for Harry.
After getting my measurements, Pryce and I went to breakfast. The sun was so warm and the trees and flowers were starting to bloom. Walking to breakfast, Pryce held my hand and I let him.
"So, are you excited to be almost finished?"
"Yes, I am so ready to be done with classrooms and professors. You're so lucky, you're finished and have a real job."
"You'll be there soon enough, sweetie."
"You're right," I said with a smile.
Pryce was safe. He wouldn't hurt me. He was one of those guys that I could introduce to my parents but he could also drink any frat boy under the table if circumstances called for it. He had a stable job and cameras and screaming fans didn't follow him around. But there was something missing and I couldn't place it.
After lunch, Pryce took me home and I put the finishing touches on my final project for my Multimedia Journalism class. It was the last thing I had to do before I was finally done with my college education. I took a breath and looked out my window and felt ok but I still felt like I was missing something. I had an idea of who it was but I wouldn't let myself wonder into that territory.
I had the whole rest of the day off for studying but with the sun calling my name, I decided to take a walk into Manhattan. New York was beautiful in spring because it was still cool enough for the garbage not to smell yet. I decided to pull out my trunk of spring clothes and found my favorite jean jacket and shook it out. I also found my beat up Chuck Taylors and laced them up. I still had my same ripped jeans but instead of a sweater, I opted for a Queen shirt I had scored at a garage sale back home in Red Bank.
"Going for a walk, be home later," I called to Laurie who was up to her ears in Accounting equations and paperwork. She didn't say anything, just waved me off. Life also felt back to normal because Laurie was back to being out and about every night whereas before she was constantly checking on me and staying in with me.
The April air was glorious and I spent my time window shopping. I caught my reflection a few times and saw my long blonde hair blowing in the wind. I hadn't realized how long it had gotten. After walking for a while longer, I abruptly found myself in front of Marc and George's studio and figured I could stop in and say hi and ask if I could have a real job with them eventually. It was my day off so I wasn't surprised when Maddy looked up from her desk and looked at me funny.
"Wait...are you two like, back together?"
I gave her a funny look and it hit me. Like a ton of concrete on my head. A faint woodsy, sweet smell hung in the air and I felt like I was going to throw up. No. He couldn't be. Could he? Here? I went to run for the door but before I could, I saw something I hadn't seen since that day with Laurie walking home from Brooklyn. Cameras and lots and lots of flashing. I turned and put my back to them to see three people coming around the corner. His dark green eyes locked into mine after all that time and I felt like jello. The pain, the joy, everything came crashing back on me like the waves of the ocean.
I wanted to run but I also wanted him to see me but did I? What if he thought I was stalking him? No. He walked away from me, now it was my turn to walk away from him.