Laide closed her eyes, lifted her arms into the air, and began to pray aloud: "Heavenly father, Oh Jesus, baba mi, oluwa awon oluwa, father of the fatherless, Ominipotent God, our personal lord and savior, blessed be your name. Baba mi, we come to you humbly asking for your forgiveness today, as we have all sinned against you."
"Thank you for showering your blessings upon us. Thank you for our husbands. Thank you Lord Jesus for the fellowship that we shared today, for the nourishing food we enjoyed, for the power of your holy word. Please watch over our dear children, our daughter in-laws our grandchildren, their friends and their children....."
Laide opened her eyes for a moment, noting with satisfaction that everyone at least was praying along with her and at the end, everybody said a resounding "AMEN!".
Second course gets served: shrimped white rice with stew garnished with fish, meat, pumo, roundabout and the rest with coleslaw with cocktails of champagne to digest the dish. Servants came in serving everyone their food as they ate in silence.
"Funmi has really put on weight since her Ibiza cruise, hasn't she? It must be those all-you-can-eat buffets-you always feel like you have to eat more to get your money's worth. She better be careful, else she'll end up with fat ankles." Laide said as Funke buts in. "She's already getting fat no need to hide the truth."
Shola couldn't help but shake her head, eating her food quietly, Nike's friends were obviously busy bodies and gossips. They're talking about her friend behind her back, but when they see her it's all pretense and fake love. Shior.
"I don't think she cares how fat her ankles get. Do you know how much she inherited when her father died? I heard she and her five brothers got nine hundred million each," Oyindamola said from her chair beside Nike.
"Is that all? I thought Funmi had at least a billion." Laide sniffed, flipping through the magazine, before calling out on Shola.
"Hey, so strange Shola, how come there's no picture of your pretty eldest daughter Toke? I remember all the photographers swarming around her that day." Laide questioned as Aisha chuckles, Shola just acted as if she didn't hear, wondering why Laide is trying to have a conversation with her in front of her mother-in-law when they're not acquainted.
"Those photographers were wasting their time. Toke's pictures are never published anywhere." Aisha said in her beautiful Hausa accent.
"You're right Aisha." Yemisi agreed. "I told Femi to make a deal with all the magazine editors back when Toke was a teenager," Yemisi explained.
"Ahan mummy why on earth would you do that? it's unnecessary" Nike said in her British accent.
"Unnecessary ke? Don't you know our family by now? You may prefer it but my husband doesn't like to appear in prints, especially our children, it's for the best." Shola said as Nike regards her with proud look before looking down at her food.
"But Shola, it's not a big deal, they're grown ups, they should be seen mingling with other Nigerians from prominent families?"Laide said indignantly.
"I totally agree you." Nike said, taking a sip of her champagne.
"Prominent Indeed, but Laide let me remind you, there's a difference between being grand and being discreet," Bolanle commented, knowing full well that families like her best friend the Ajirotutu's and the Salami's guarded their privacy to the point of obsession.
"Grand or not, I think Toke is wonderful," Yinka chimed in.
"You know, I'm not supposed to say, but Toke wrote the biggest check at the fundraiser. And she insisted that I keep it anonymous. But her donation was what made this year's gala a record-breaking success." Laide said as Shola's friend's looks at her irritation. Amebo.
The lunch had ended and they were back inside the mansion, all gathered in the sitting room, talking and laughing. Yemisi sat in the middle lounge couch and Nike sat on her left with her friends and Shola sat at the right with her own friends. It was obvious they didn't like each other's company.
Nike eyed the pretty new maid entering the room, wondering if this was another one of the girls that her mother in-law had handpicked from that "employment agency at Ikeja" reputed to have the most beautiful handworking women in Lagos for housekeeping.
The maid came in and placed a familiar bulky mother-of-pearl chest beside Yemisi. "Mummy what do you have today another collection?" Shola asked Yemisi, as her mother in-law chuckles softly.
"Oh, I wanted to show you what I bought on my trip to Europe." Yemisi flipped open the lid chest as everyone waited anxiously to see what the matriarch was taking out.
Yemisi eagerly and began methodically taking out the stacked black velvet trays. One of her favorite parts of Friday Bible study was looking at showing the ladies her latest acquisitions.
Soon the sofa was lined with trays containing a blinding array of jewels.
"What intricate crosses-I didn't realize they did such good setting work in Germany!" Laide said.
"No, no, those crosses are Harry Winston," Yinka corrected as Laide rolls her eyes. Yimu.
"Very beautiful piece mummy, the rubies are from Paris." Aisha placed her saucer on the stool, got up and headed straight for the sofa, holding up one of the lychee-size rubies to the light.
"Walahi, i must say mummy, you have fine taste for jewelry , but please you have to be careful, in Paris because so many of their rubies are synthetically treated to boost the redness." Aisha said, being the wife of Aliko Dangote of Dangote Cements and Danté Jewelry & Co Aisha could speak on this topic with authority.
"I thought rubies from Europe were supposed to be the best, i remember when Mide got me a Rolex on my birthday, oh........." Yemisi remarked but was interrupted by BUZZING of iphone beeps.
She looks disapprovingly as Laide and Uju's phone continues to beep, while checking their messages. The rest women continues to speak with upper crust Nigerian British accents, their perfect grammar with local flourishes.
"Ehen! Hey, speaking of Ayomide, when does he arrive from New York or is it Dubai? Isn't he the best man at Odunayo's wedding?" My friend Amanda heard it from her friend that he's coming with a guest." Laide spilled the beans as Shola eyes her.
"What do you mean my grandsonAyomide? What guest is that? Is it someone that I know" Yemisi asked rather darting her eyes left and right curiously.
"The one... ... he's bringing ... to the wedding," Yinka replied slowly, her eyes darting around at the other ladies mischievously, knowing they all knew to whom she was referring.
"What are you talking about? Who is he bringing? What's going on? Shola what are she talking about? O de soro soke kin gbo." Yemisi questioned, a little bit confused, Shola shurgs. "I don't understand what she's talking about." Shola denys, trying to change the subject, Nike gasps and spills the truth.
"Shola what do you mean you don't know that Mide is engaged to his latest girlfriend!" Nike revealed as Yemisi and Shola exclaimed. "What!!!!"
"Kini ? Oh my, You didn't know," Nike spoke Yoruba with her British accent and then jeered.
"Iro ni, laye, ko le shele, No such thing! No way Shola has a fiancée. I know my son, Mide will never do such a thing without telling me or his father. Never! Nike stop spreading lies." Shola argued, Nike hissed.
"Lies?" Uju Wellington chuckles wickedly. "Oh my word, why is it so hard for you to believe that your son has a fiancée?" Uju asked.
"Why won't she believe it." Laide jumps in. "Something that is on every social media platform, mmmm, Instablog, Gistlover, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, Lindaikeji, Punch, Arise News, in fact they mentioned it on some radio stations that..........." Laide continues but Uju cuts her short abruptly.
"He proposed to her in Dubai, very exquisite, infact the ring was a twenty four carat rose curt diamond, made from your family's jeweler in Shanghai." Uju insisted she had always found Mide to be the most dashing young man of his generation, and with all that Young money, it was such a pity her good for nothing daughter Stéphanie broke up with him and never managed to pin him down or got pregnant for him. Foolish girl.
Flagarbasted by this news, Yemisi checked her sides in search of her mobile. She needed to be sure her ears weren't deceived her. "Lord have mercy, where is my phone?....Mathew! Mathew! Maaatheeew! Bring me my phone this instant!" Yemisi demaned in her British accent.
Immediately the head of the household, hasteingly brings her iPhone 14. Without hesitation Yemisi starts to suff the internet and wasn't liking what she was seeing, her grandson's picture and the girl in question was everywhere on social media.
"Goodness gracious. What is this! Help me Jesus, Shola it's true. Mide is engaged, how- how come you didn't know about this, he was suppose to come home and then we discuss this marriage thing with him. Oh dear my only grandson is now whisked off to a total stranger, a gold digger." She laments while scrolling through the phone as Shola kept quiet, going through hers as well. It seems they were right after all, it was true, Linda Ikeji had dropped the bombshell weeks ago and she wasn't aware.
Wahala ....Oti shele, Mide ti pa mi. She thought to herself.
Seated farthest by her left side, a beep comes on Bolanle William's iPhone, she unlocks it and checks the message, her daughter sent. "Mmmm, wonders shall never end, Motunrayo says her name is Annika Twala?"
"Twala? That name sounds weird....Twala.. more like wahala if you ask me." Oyindamola grits her teeth, while scrolling through her iPhone.
"But i thought that Mide was coming alone for Odunayo's wedding,.... this is quite shocking i must say. A future Mrs Ajirotutu coming to ours shores... interesting." She added tapping her phone screen as Shola eyes her with disgust.
"Did you know he had a fiancée Shola? ma pa iro fun mi o? Were you aware of this fiasco?" Yemisi asked as all eyes are on Shola who shuts her phone, not wanting to get into the details.
"No mummy, i don't know anything about it...., mi o para now." Shola said as Nike scoffs.
"But surely you've heard about this girl? The one from Africa," Laide said in a whisper to Funke relishing that she was the one breaking the news but Shola heard it.
"An african girl?" Shola exclaims.
"Yes an African girl, i hear she's a celebrity too, well known in her county, very famous too. Shola you should ask Toke, she knows about it, after all she's your eldest daughter." Bolanle chipped in as Shola shuns her.
"Oh o, You see, truth is always bitter," Nike said.
"Impossible, Mide wouldn't dare do such a thing. Laide, you gossip too much, your information are always lies !" Shola said as Laide gawks.
"What do you mean she gossips too much Shola? Her news comes from the most reliable source! Don't blame her, it's not her fault your son doesn't tell you what he does." Nike stated with a sarcasm as everyone gasped.
"Ahan ahan....... Nike that is too much." Yinka replied.
"Oh please Yinka, clearly i wasn't talking to you..... Well mummy it's true, Mide's fiancée is an African from a Zulu tribe," Nike offered, shunning Shola's friend.
"Zulu ke, Really? What's her name again?" Yemisi asked.
"Annika Twala." Nike replied.
"Annikulapo? Where is she from? Is her family reputable, well to do? Nike, if you tell me she's from Morocco, I think I'll have a stroke," Yemisi warned, Nike smirks.
"I heard she's from South Africa," Nike said carefully as her mother exclaimed.
"Eje Jesu !!! Aah, Nibo? Oh my goodness, South Africa ba wo? I hope she's not one of those Swahili tornadoes! Shola are you hearing this, my grandson!" Yemisi cackled.
"Mummy why are you believing all these lies, it's just rumour." Shola argued.
"What do you mean by that Shola? It's all over the news you're saying it's a rumour, my grandson is engaged to a stranger and you know nothing about it, especially how notorious those South African girls can be. They swoop in unexpectedly, the men fall head over heels, and before you know it they are gone, but not before sucking up every last dollar, just like a tornado, Ah Mide has killed me o." Yemisi explained looking worried and angry.
"Ephesians. Chapter six, verse four. Bring up your children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." Yemisi couldn't help herself. "This is unbelievable, Oh, I do hope she's a good, christian girl." Yemisi lamented.
Laide clears her throat and speaks in a low conspiratorial tone. "Mummy If you want, I have a private investigator. Very discreet, i could ask him to look into the girl if...." She gets interrupted by Shola.
"Shut up Laide, gbenu dake, your mouth is wide, Private investigator my foot, why are you adding fuel to the fire, you'll just open your mouth waaaa, infact this is a family matter, ki lo kon e." Shola exclaimed.
Annoyed Nike speaks up in her British accent defensively. "Calm down Shola take it easy, she's only trying to hel........."
"Just zip it right there, ko ya gbe ko! stop acting like you have my son's interest in mind sho gbo. Hold it there, even if he doesn't tell me what he does, he's still my son not yours, kò ko shi danu daleru daleru! Nonsense!" Shola snapped at her, standing up with her bag, hissed and started walking out of the gathering enraged and insulted.
"You're leaving already?.....Shola come back here! it hasn't gotten up to that, where are you going..... Shola!..... Shola!... .. Shola!" Yemisi tries calling her daughter in-law to come back but she turned deaf ears. It was obvious to Yemisi that both of her daughter inlaws can never patch things up.
**********
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