"Was I raised without love? Or born unlovable?"
———
. . .what?
. . .
This had to be some form of cruel joke, right?
He had questions, questions without answers. His pale hands trembled more, holding the letter shakily. He blinked again, his vision was a bit blurry but he could read this.
𝐇𝐎𝐆𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐋 𝐎𝐅
𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐂𝐑𝐀𝐅𝐓 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐖𝐈𝐙𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐑𝐘
𝗛𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗺𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿: 𝗔𝗹𝗯𝘂𝘀 𝗗𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗱𝗼𝗿𝗲
(𝗢𝗿𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗳 𝗠𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻, 𝗙𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁 𝗰𝗹𝗮𝘀𝘀, 𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗰., 𝗖𝗵𝗳. 𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗰𝗸, 𝗦𝘂𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗺𝗲 𝗠𝘂𝗴𝘄𝘂𝗺𝗽, 𝗜𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗲𝗱. 𝗼𝗳 𝗪𝗶𝘇𝗮𝗿𝗱𝘀)
𝗗𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗠𝗿 𝗛𝗮𝗻𝗮𝗸𝗼,
𝗪𝗲 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝗮𝘁 𝗛𝗼𝗴𝘄𝗮𝗿𝘁𝘀 𝗦𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗼𝗹 𝗼𝗳 𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗰𝗿𝗮𝗳𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗪𝗶𝘇𝗮𝗿𝗱𝗿𝘆. 𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗱 𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗹𝗼𝘀𝗲𝗱 𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗻𝗲𝗰𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗮𝗿𝘆 𝗯𝗼𝗼𝗸𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗶𝗽𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁. 𝗧𝗲𝗿𝗺 𝗯𝗲𝗴𝗶𝗻𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝟭 𝗦𝗲𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿. 𝗪𝗲 𝗮𝘄𝗮𝗶𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗼𝘄𝗹 𝗯𝘆 𝗻𝗼 𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝗻 𝟯𝟭 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝘆.
𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀 𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗹𝘆,
𝓜𝓲𝓷𝓮𝓻𝓿𝓪 𝓜𝓬𝓖𝓸𝓷𝓪𝓰𝓪𝓵𝓵
𝗗𝗲𝗽𝘂𝘁𝘆 𝗛𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀
. . .maybe he shouldn't have read this.
Order of Merlin. . . Supreme Mugwump. . .what?
The confusion only grew.
'Await your owl' Did they truly believe he was going to find an owl, give it a letter and send it to them?
This had to be some sick joke.
But yet. . .
He wanted to believe otherwise. That shard of hope dug deep into his heart, deep into his soul.
But how could he know if it was real? Everything about it seemed fake. Yet it seemed so real. Was that possible?
The next half hour after midnight was spent rereading the letter.
———
He came to a conclusion.
He had to tell his mother about this.
His step father was out of the question. Not even near the scenario. His mother was easier to talk to if she was just a bit sober.
Tomorrow.
For now, sleep. Much needed sleep.
———
Morning rolled around, same as it did.
But it was different.
Pale, scarred hands rubbed his eyes. Sitting up. The letter was still there, on his bed next to him.
The first half of his day consisted of his chores, chores and more chores. The harsh insults thrown his way were almost useless, he was used to it already. Today was no different than the others, his birthday held no importance to the world, nor the house.
It still stung a little though. Knowing he was at the bottom of the barrel even in his own house.
Cautiously making his way to his mothers room- a territory he rarely crossed, in a house that was supposed to be his home.
He prayed she wasn't asleep.
Clutching the letter in his hand, he hesitated. Then, he knocked on the door softly.
Too late to back out now.
Here goes nothing.
"Come in."
An annoyed voice came through. He opened the door slowly, peeking inside. His mother was lying on her bed, book in one hand and ice pack in the other, resting on her forehead.
Ah, his step father's doing. He couldn't help but feel a twinge of guilt.
"Ma'am?"
His voice came out softly, but a bit hesitant.
He was never allowed to call his mother by parental terms, he'd come to face that fact. It was another reminder that he never belonged anywhere.
A grunt followed, indicating that she heard him. She looked up, and motioned for him to close the door and come closer. He closed the door upon the gesture. Thin legs trembled with every step taken towards the bed.
A sigh came, and then "What do you want now?," She sounded annoyed and tired.
He felt just a hint of irritation- he never asked for anything. Ever. He was taught by life to get things himself, survive for himself. Struggle on his terms because nobody would do it for him.
Not anymore.
As soon as the irritation came, it disappeared. Nervousness took its place once more. He didn't want, nor need, his mother lashing out at him.
Clearing his throat, he shuffled in place, "I- I'm sorry- it's just. . ." He paused, fidgeting with the letter. He mentally cursed himself for the stutter, his voice always failed him when he was in situations like these. How was he going to explain an owl gave him a letter? Maybe she'll put him in a mental hospital.
He looked up, seeing her annoyed expression, and decided to just get on with it. "Well- here-" And he handed her the envelope. A look of confusion with irritation was casted his way. She took it, unfolding it and reading. Shiyo watched her eyes grow wide, brows furrowing.
". . . Oh my fucking god." she spoke with an exasperated tone, pinching the bridge of her nose, "I thought I got rid of them. . ."
Of course, this only sparked a sense of shock in the dazed albino boy. Got rid of them? Are they bad? No, they're a school. . . Right? This was weird. Very, very weird. He watched her reread the letter, squinting and then glancing at him, eyes calculating.
". . . So you have magic in you." She sighed, rolling her eyes, "should've guessed, it was possible." The letter was pocketed. "Didn't you get list with the requirements?" Her tone sounded accusing, eyebrow raised.
Oh- right. The owl had actually dropped off the list with the letter. He was too dazed and tired to realize it. Shiyo nodded, waiting nervously for her reaction. Though, he couldn't help but feel a small hint of excitement.
Both pairs of red eyes locked- just for a moment. "You're eleven today right?" Her tone was riddled with annoyance. He nodded, gaze returning to the floor. Atleast she remembered. Didn't matter she didn't celebrate it- it would be a waste of money for a waste of space and oxygen, in his eyes. He 'celebrated' right at midnight anyways, knowing he probably wouldn't be able to do much on the day itself.
He nodded mutely, wondering what was going to happen. She sighed, patting the space next to her on the bed as she swung her legs over the edge. She didn't seem quite happy about this, but nothing could be done anyways. Shiyo stood for second, then hesitantly sat down next to her. He was on guard, not used to being so near his own mother. His eyes glanced between her own and his shirt hem.
"No choice but to say it. Magic is real. I'd hoped I'd never say that again, but here we are-" she rolled her eyes, "-having this talk. Wizards and Witches exist, and Hogwarts is a school where they teach magic. It's not the only school but you can figure out the rest later. Less work for me." She glanced at him, raising an eyebrow, almost daring him to object. When he gave no response, she continued.
"The only thing beneficial here is you leaving this house. Less strain on our backs providing for you. There's dorms in Hogwarts, public and private. Again, you can learn about that later. You can get your equipment in Diagon Alley. I guess I'll have to take you there." She rolled her eyes yet again. Shiyo seemed a little lost but said nothing, he could figure it out later.
"So."
She turned to look at him directly, instead of the side glances he'd been receiving.
"Do you want to go to Hogwarts?," eyebrows raised, eyes looking at him as if she already knew his answer.
He thought for a moment. A split second. All the information he was given was running in his mind. Before he nodded. This. . .
. . .This could be his second chance.
To his surprise, his mother's gaze softened. Well, that was a first. She looked away. Was that. . .guilt? No- that couldn't be right. It couldn't. Was it?
"I think you should go aswell. I. . . I know I haven't been exactly. . . motherly- towards you. For my own reasons," she gave him a quick half glare, "but it'll give you a fresh start in the. . .world of magic."
This, was not what he was expecting. Out of all the information he'd heard of, this was the most shocking. His own mother, feeling guilt over- not being an actual mother figure? For once? Maybe she wasn't all that sober after all. Who knows. He didn't question it.
". . .I'll deal with John. Obviously you won't be able to explain anything to him, so I'll do it." He felt guilty aswell, eyeing her ice pack for a quick moment, before feeling a bit grateful that his mother decided to do something for him for once.
Shiyo blinked his eyes repeatedly and looked away. Surely this was a dream? This, this was actually real? Another chance? No more suffering in this hellhole of a home and a town? Atleast, until holidays? He contemplated it for a second, looking back at his mother, who nodded.
His breath hitched, but he swallowed the lump in his throat. Getting emotional wasn't necessary right now, he could do that later.
"Get your crap together, use that suitcase in the corner. We'll go to Diagon Alley tomorrow. Ask your questions then." she rubbed her eyes. Shiyo blinked, nodding before realizing, ". . .wait- but. . What about the await your owl part-" "I'll deal with it. Just get your shit packed." voice cold once more, she snapped. Shiyo instinctively flinched backwards, but nodded again. A dismissive wave told him to go on his way, and so he did. Moving quickly, he took the suitcase and scurried out of his mothers room, closing the door behind him carefully.
He couldn't help but feel the corners of his lips tug upwards. He hadn't smiled in so long, he'd almost forgotten how to. Speed walking to his room, closing the door.
'I'm actually going to be a wizard. . . I'm going to learn magic. . Oh my god. . .'
Chest blooming with giddiness, he set out to fill the suitcase. But what should he pack? Clothes- well yes, food? Maybe a snack, or maybe- everything. He should pack everything. As much as he could. Hogwarts. . .could be his new home. Ah, he's getting ahead of himself again. But how could he not?
He scrambled around his room, grabbing every single clothing item he owned. Folding them carefully and filling the suitcase. Books, passed down to him by the person that once lived in this room, violin in its violin case (how did that even fit in the suitcase?), his medical kit (which needed a restock), and much more things his tiny pale hands could grab.
After closing up the suitcase, he noted that 'Hanako' was engraved onto the front in gold cursive. Now he knew it was his. . .wait, this was his fathers suitcase, his actual father. . .
He was a wizard too? How come he was only now hearing about this? Why did his mother want to leave the world of magic, did something bad happen?. . . He shook his head, questions were never to be asked, but he would be allowed to ask them tomorrow. So, tomorrow it was.
Pale fingers glided over the engraving. It felt. . . strange. Perhaps the suitcase was. . .magic affected? Something magic related- otherwise, how could it fit his entire violin case? Well, he was grateful, that's for sure.
There wasn't much left to do for the day anyways, his chores were done. Setting the suitcase by his bed, he yawned and laid back down, uncomfortably aware of his injuries. He hadn't eaten for the day, and he could hear his step father in the living room. Not taking any chances there.
His mind filed through ideas about what Hogwarts could be like. Hopefully nothing like his now old school. Would he be using a wand? Or could he do magic without one? Could he do magic now? Well, he didn't know how yet. Again- why is he only now hearing about this? Where is Diagon Alley? Is it hidden? Or just unlisted?
So many questions, answers that will hopefully be given to him the next day- if he mustered the courage to ask.
His train of thought stopped abruptly. What if being an albino was just as taboo in the magic world? What if people from the magic world treat him just like everyone else did?
He shuddered at the thought. He had hell from here, he could only hope this new chance would be different. His mother was an albino, she never said what her school life was like. . . What if she left because she was mistreated for being an albino? What if there was another hunt for albinos in the magical world?
That same nervousness returned, more in the form of anxiety. Would his mother send him there if that was what truly happened?. . .
. . .she probably would. Well, that didn't help.
He took a deep breath. This was his second chance at being normal- or how normal being a wizard could get. Maybe he could dye his hair or something. Or just, see how things turn out.
Thinking for a moment- He had magic inside him? He must've, that's why he was chosen, right? The thought triggered a memory of him turning Harrison's hair pink- perhaps that was his magic? It was funny, Harrison was so embarrassed and confused. The beatings he got after that didn't deter him from thinking it was worth it, whatever he did.
Well, he would find out tomorrow. Maybe his mother could answer his questions like she said he would. Shiyo continued the day with a poker face, hiding the optimism inside him, optimistic for a new change in his life that would come tomorrow.
A new life. A better one.
———
a/n: The story progresses! Diagon Alley? Coming right up!