I apologise if there are any mistakes, I originally wrote the entire thing in first person and then decided to change it :)
3.9K words 💬
TW: use of the f slur (I'm bisexual btw), mentions of suicide and self-harm, coming out, bullying, humiliation, etc.
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"You're so ugly!" The popular girls say, surrounding you in the changing rooms. "Look at her belly!" You were in the middle of changing when they took your clothes away and you were left standing in your underwear. "Give it back!" You command, reaching out to grab your shirt. "Eww! Look at her armpits!" They all began cackling at the hair growing underneath, you forgot to shave the night before.
You quickly glued your arms to your sides, feeling the tears pricking your eyes. "Awe, poor baby. She's gonna cry." Anna says, poking your cheek. "No, I'm not." Unfortunately enough for you, a single tear fell down your cheek as soon as you spoke. "Look! The fag's crying!" They begin chanting faggot while pointing at you and because they had me cornered, you couldn't escape.
Anna then approaches you with your clothes, throwing them at your face. "Here's your fucking clothes, don't let anyone see that monstrosity of a body again unless you want them to go blind." "Fuck you, Carver." "The fuck did you say?" She says before taking a hand to your face, slapping you. "If you ever try and stand up to me again, those ugly brown locks of yours'll be gone, got it?" I nodded in response. "Good, you know the drill, Munson." "Tell anyone and I'm dead." "That's a good dog, cya later freak."
After the bimbo left with her clique, you slid down the wall and cried into your hands, still in your underwear. An hour passed and you decided that you should probably get up and change before anyone finds you. Most people know you for your dad, Eddie Munson.
You found it quite ironic that most people still think he's some satanic freak who sacrifices goats for the devil fifteen years later. He and you share the same interests too, you both enjoy dnd, your love for your guitars and heavy metal. Though after Nirvana had risen to fame, you were converted to grunge and pop-punk but your love for heavy metal still lies within.
Growing up, Eddie taught you to love yourself without makeup and these were one of those times you wish he hadn't. He'd go ballistic if he found any makeup in your room, he found an eyeliner pencil and banned me from any makeup stores until you were eighteen as you, "couldn't be trusted" around them.
You gathered yourself up and wiped my tear-stained cheeks, walking out into the crowded halls and hoping you wouldn't be spotted. Though your plan failed. "Y/n!" It was your best friend, Owen Harrington, the only other freak in the school. "Hey." I said, seeming down. "What's up?" "Nothing." He examined your red face and wet eyelashes, he knew you'd been crying.
"What happened?" "Anna and her clones happened." "I swear, I'm gonna kill her one day." The serious tone in his voice caused me to laugh a little. "I'm glad you're feeling better y/n." "Thanks O."
(TIME SKIP)
Anna had found you after school while you were walking home and did what she does best, make your life a living hell. "Hey, fag!" She yelled, resulting in you turning your headphones up more to drown out her whiny voice. "Hey! Don't ignore me." She pulled your headphones off one ear and continued to walk behind. "That's a nice iPod you got there, looks expensive." "Yeah, it was a birthday gift."
Eddie isn't exactly the richest, he works as a mechanic so his pay is decent but you can't just go around buying everything you see. He bought you an iPod for your birthday and you cherish it with your entire life, you've never loved anything more. "It would be a shame if it got ruined." "Yeah, it wou- WHAT THE FUCK!" She began to pour masses of cold water over your head, as it was winter you were already cold enough so the cold water running down your back didn't help.
You held your hand out to protect my iPod, Anna quickly went to reach for it and you knew she would so you quickly drew it away. Though when she stepped forward to grab it, she stepped on your shoelace, causing you to fall flat on my face. "Clumsy fag." Anna muttered, looking down at you pathetically lying on the floor before walking away.
Your hands stung while your knees bled through your black jeans. You immediately check on your precious iPod and sighed, it was okay. You got onto your knees and dusted your front while plugging your music back into your ears, the sound of Kurt Cobain's sappy voice singing Dumb came through, causing your sad feelings to come through even stronger.
You broke down in the middle of the sidewalk, holding your face in your hands and shivering from the cold. People walked past giving you, giving you funny looks but you didn't care, you were done with everything. Nothing was going right for you, you were dealing with social anxiety so school is quite difficult for you, the crowded halls, constantly feeling like people are talking shit about you, and having to deal with Anna and her squad.
You managed to pick yourself up and continue walking, though you struggled to keep yourself up. Your hands felt almost frozen as they were hard to move and you had what felt like a brain freeze from the freezing, soaked mop on your head.
You shortly reached the trailer park, storming inside and seeing dad on the couch, watching TV. "Hey princess, what's wro-" His words were cut short by you slamming your bedroom door behind yourself. Then, you began to blast one of your favourite bands, Linkin Park. You purposefully played it loud so your cries couldn't be heard, using a pillow to muffle them as well just to be safe.
You knew Eddie was probably knocking on your door, wondering why you were in such a mood. Because of the music, you didn't notice your door crack open, he was watching you splayed out on my bed crying to yourself. You hadn't even given yourself a chance to take your backpack off, you just flopped on your bed and cried.
He knows when you're upset as you always listen to Linkin Park when you're sad, he picks up on the small things you do when you're in such a mood. You felt a dip in your bed and a hand rested on your arm so you looked up, seeing a small smile complimenting his face. You tried to smile at him but it just resulted in more tears flowing.
You turn away so he couldn't see your teary face and you feel your backpack slipping off your shoulders, so you wriggle around, helping it come off. You feel it hit the floor next to you as Eddie came and lay beside you. He taps your shoulder which makes you look up at him and he was holding his arms out, indicating that he wanted to give you a hug which you happily obliged.
You crawl into his chest as he wrapped his arms around you, crying into his shoulder as he held you close, Linkin Park still blaring in the background making your cries impossible to hear. After a while, you eventually calm down. Your breath was still shaky and your bottom lip trembled so you bit down on it, to keep it steady.
He noticed your cries relax, so he reaches over to your stereo, turning it down, now making your voices able to be heard. "What's, up honey? Did something happen at school?" "Anna said that I looked fat and that my body hair was disgusting." "She's just jealous you've hit puberty and she hasn't." His snarky comment resulted in a laugh coming from you, considering he's supposed to be the adult.
He rubs your back as he continues to comfort you, "I mean, body hair is a natural thing anyway. It was bound to grow at some point pumpkin." He presses a finger to the end of your nose, making you giggle. "And as for the fat shaming, your body is beautiful, and don't let anyone tell you any different okay? You are gorgeous, stunning, and unique, and I bet you she's just jealous. Don't ever doubt your beauty, there's no one else like you, and don't ever feel insecure about yourself. You are a real treat for the eye. I would pay millions just to look at your beautiful face."
You look up at him with pure admiration, he always knows when you need a little ego boost. Though, there was one other thing that was troubling you. The slurs. A constant reminder of how you're different. You believed you could trust Anna with your secret, but she turned on you. She sure as hell let the entire school know just how much of a fruit bowl you were and it hurt; The constant stares, whispers of the faggot, and nasty notes shoved in your locker.
It got so bad to the point where you were contemplating things like self-harm and suicide, but you knew that you couldn't leave your dad behind. And honestly, he hasn't got much of a life. His life mainly consists of work, eating, occasionally drinking beer, and giving his daughter the love and care she needs.
While you sit taking in what he said, your mind drifted over to the homophobic slurs you'd been called throughout the day. "Is there something else bothering you?" He must've noticed the spaced-out look on your face. "I, uh- yeah, there is something else." "What is it?" You take a deep breath while preparing yourself for the words that were about to leave your lips.
"I- uh, I'm- shit," You mumble, going over your words a thousand times. "It's okay, take your time." "A lot of people at school bully me for, um for being a- uh, for-for being- gay." After you choked up the words, you look up at his face and his emotions were unreadable. You couldn't tell if he was mad, happy, or what was going on in that brain of his.
"Are you mad?" You ask, panicking slightly. "No! Never, why would I be mad?" "Cuz I'm a faggot." "Don't say that angel, you know I'll love you no matter what, and I'm proud of you for doing that. I know it's hard and those kids at school are assholes, how did they find out anyway?" "I told Anna because I thought we were friends but then she told everyone and they all turned on me and started calling me slurs and shoving nasty notes in my locker telling me to kill myself and shit and I just couldn't take it."
You feel the waterworks threatening to release again as you vent, his mood changed when you talked about the suicide threats people had been writing to you. "Oh my fucking god, I swear I'm taking you out of that school." "But- what about Owen?" He sighed, realizing you can't leave your best friend behind.
"I can talk to Steve if you'd like, see if he can come with you to a different school?" "Really?" You shoot up, looking at him and leaning on your elbows either side of his chest. "Yeah, anything to make my princess happy." He leaves a kiss on your forehead as you hug him tightly. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" "It's okay my love."
You leave a kiss on his cheek, causing him to giggle as you go back to hugging him. Knowing that you could finally leave that shitty school behind and find somewhere you not only enjoyed but could bring your best friend along with me. "Y/n?" "Mm?" "Why are you wet?" You began to giggle slightly at the way he worded his sentence, "Not like that! Christ y/n." He began to laugh along with you, "Anna dumped a bottle of water over my head. She's such a bitch." "Just like her daddy. C'mon, I'll help you dry off."
You sit up as he guides you over to your shared bathroom, grabbing a towel for you. "Dry off while I get you some warmer clothes alright?" "Mhm." He leaves you in the bathroom as he went back into your room, going through your drawers and picking out clothes for you. You remove your wet clothes, then take the warm towel, and pat yourself down.
While you were doing so, you hear Eddie on the phone. "Steve! Hey, uh- can you come over? I'll tell you when you get here. Oh, and bring Owen and Robin. Because I want her to talk to y/n. Listen, I'll tell you when she's ready. Okay, bye." Then, he knocked on the door. "Princess? I got you some clothes." "Thanks." You crack the door open a touch, poking your head out. "Oh, Steve, Owen and Robin are coming over." "Oh cool." "I'll talk to Steve about you guys moving schools and stuff, sound good?" "Sounds great."
He gives you a gentle smile before walking out and shutting the door behind him. As you were changing, you hear everyone pile into your little trailer. "Where is she?" Owen asks, presumably worried. "She's just getting changed in the bathroom." Hearing his voice, you change quicker, eager to see your best friend.
You step out, seeing everyone gathered in the living room. "Hey, uh- I brought Robbie here, thought you guys could talk." Eddie says with a smile. "Hey y/n!" Robin says, engulfing you in a hug. "Hi, Robbie!" "C'mon, your dad wants me to talk to you." She takes you into your bedroom, sitting down on your bed with you.
"Did Eddie tell you why I'm here?" "No." "Alright. Basically, you and I are alike." "What do you mean?" "I like girls too." She says, leaning down to you. "I had no idea." "Yeah, he said you'd been bullied for it." "Yeah, people at my school aren't very- accepting." "I get that. Believe me, I was bullied relentlessly for it in middle school. Considering it was like, around the eighties and seventies time, homophobes hunted for people like us. Now, I'm not saying I had it worse because we all deal with things differently. But- I know how it feels."
You sit and listened to Robin talk and thinking about it, you and Robin always had a different type of connection compared to your other aunts and uncles. It was indescribable, y'all just got each other. "So, how did you deal with it?" "I just didn't tell anyone, stayed away from people I knew would haunt me if they found out." "Makes sense. I made the mistake of telling someone I thought I could trust." "Carvers kid?" "Mhm." "What a prick. You got a crush yet?" "I might." "Ooh! Tell me more!"
Robin leans against the headboard next to you, listening carefully. "Well, her name's Melody. Melody Hargrove." "BILLY'S KID?!" "Shhh!" "Sorry!" "She's really pretty. My other best friend." "Ahh, the ol' best friend crush, what a classic. I like it." Her little comment makes you giggle. "I love her eyes, such a pretty green." "She sounds like a real treat." "She is. She's nothing like her dad." "Thank god." You were about to continue when a knock at the door stops you. "Everything alright?"
It was Eddie, supposedly checking in on the pair of you. "She has a crush of Hargroves kid!" She whisper-yells. Your cheeks heat up fairly quick as Eddie smiles, walks in, and shuts the door behind. "Melody? I always thought she seemed a little more than friendly with you." "You think so?" "Oh yeah, Don't you see the way she looks at you?" "No?" "God, you sure I don't need to take you to get your eyes checked?" He jokes as you and Robin both laugh along. "What if-" Eddie starts before you cut him off. "No!" "What? You don't even know what I was going to say!" "You we're gonna say that you'll talk to Billy." "Goddamn y/n, I hate how you know me so well."
He flops onto the bed, just in front of yours and Robins feet. "So, what're you gonna do about it?" Robin asks, bringing her knees just under her chin. "I don't know, maybe... Ask her out sometime?" "What, like a date?" "Yeah." You begin to pick the skin on your fingers, Eddie notices and swats your hands apart. "I told you to quit doing that." "Sorry." "I say go for it." Robin suggests, "But-" "Nope, no buts." "What if she doesn't even like girls?" "She does. Trust me, I can smell it on her." Eddie chimes in. "Okay, alright."
Eddie finally gets up and goes into the living area of the trailer, Owen comes into your room to see what y'all are up to. "Hey, bitch." "Sup, dickface." "I don't think I've ever seen two best friends greet each other so nicely." Robin says, listening in. "I heard y'all talking about Melody." "Were we loud?" "No, I was outside the door." "Owen!" "Sorry! I was just interested." He lays between your legs, resting his head on your breasts. "You're such a dork." You say, wrapping your arms around him.
People often made the mistake of believing that you and Owen were dating, you clearly weren't but you understood how that accusation could be made. Even Eddie had made that assumption before he knew that you weren't interested in guys anyway. If Owen stayed over, he'd sleep in bed with you. Eddie had no problem with this, as long as you kept the door open. Obviously from his past, he knew what could happen at such a pubescent age... if you catch my drift.
You and Owen shared all the same interests, skateboarding, gaming, band, smoking, (Obviously, Eddie bought the cigarettes for you. He's a cool dad.) and other things such like. If you were good, Eddie and Steve would take you to a bar with them and let you drink a pint of beer each. This just so happened to be one of those nights. While you, Robin, and Owen were talking, Steve comes in. "Hey guys, did y'all wanna come to the bar with us?" "Can we drink?" Owen asks. "If you're careful." "Steve, you're such a shitty father." Robin says as she gets up, making you and Owen giggle.
You and Owen get your shoes on, Robin doing the same. "I'm going home mini-me, I'll catch up with you later yeah?" She says, hugging you. "Of course." "Cya!" As she leaves, you go to your room, shoving a packet of cigs into your pocket. Robin was very anti-smoking, so you couldn't show her that your 15-year-old self was already a smoker. "Y'all ready?" "Yep." You all get into Steve's family car, big enough to fit six children. Yeah, Owen had a ton of siblings.
You reach the bar, step outside the van and walk toward the bar in a group of four. It was entirely empty, except for this one drunken man who was there often. Eddie and Steve go in first, ordering a pint for the four of yous. "Here you go, be careful okay? I'm not looking after you drunk again." Eddie says. "We will." You both happily take the beers, carefully sipping on them like you were asked.
Eddie and Steve sat at the bar, you and Owen sat down at a booth further away. "You really think she likes me?" You ask, taking a sip. "I know she does, she told me herself y/n." "What, that she likes me?" "Yes! Definitely!" "So, if I asked her on a date, you think she'd say yes?" "She can't say no, I know she loves you." You sigh, feeling a little overwhelmed from today. "I need to smoke." "Me too." "C'mon." You take him into the womens restroom, of course Eddie and Steve see and are a little confused. "I thought she didn't like guys?" "Y'know they're probably smoking in there right?" "We're terrible fathers."
You walk into a specific stall, the one with the window. "Here." You say, passing Owen a cig. "Thanks. God, I wish I had Eddie as a dad." "Steve doesn't know you smoke?" "No, he knows. He just won't buy 'em for me." "Oh, that sucks." You say, sparking up both of your cigarettes. Owen sat on the window ledge, and you sat on the top of the toilet, resting your feet on the lid. "Today was wack." "I know, come sit on my lap. The sunset looks really nice from here." Owen suggests. You follow his orders, sitting on his lap facing out the window.
"You're right. It is pretty out there." You look into the setting sun, the car park lit up by an orange glow. "So pretty." "Can you ask Steve if you can stay over?" "Mhm, If you want me to." Owen says, blowing smoke out of the window. "Can you bring that bong too?" "Wanna get high?" "Yeah." That was the only thing Eddie didn't know; You and Owen both did weed. It wasn't a massive deal, but Eddie always told you to come to him if you ever felt like it. The only reason you didn't, was because you were scared you'd embarrass yourself. He was an expert after all.
Owen's arm stayed wrapped around your waist, making sure you don't slip as he sips on his beer while you take drags of your cigarette. "I wanna do this with Melody one day." You state, thinking out loud. "Yeah?" "Yeah, I'd be you. Making sure she wouldn't fall while we watch the sunset." "I'm sure she'd love that y/n." "I hope so." You both finish your cigarettes at the same time, throwing them out the window and slowly finishing your beers.
The bathroom door abruptly knocks, "Is it good to come in?" "Yeah, you're good." It was Steve, walking into the womens bathroom. "Hey, is everything alright?" "Dad?" Asks Owen. "What's up bud?" "Can I stay at y/n's?" "Well, we were going to see your aunt tomorrow but- I guess it'll be alright if you miss it." "Thanks dad." "It's alright Owen." He walks back out, leaving you two alone again. "I'm sure dad'll be fine with you staying, it's not like we're busy or anything." "He usually is." "Yeah. 'M kinda tired." "You can take a nap when we get home if you want." "You wouldn't mind?" "Nah." "Today's just been shitty man. I need to relax for a bit." "That's where the wonders of weed come in." Owen's little joke makes you giggle, knowing it was probably what you needed.
The pair of you leave the bathroom, the smell of smoke lingering on your clothes and breath. "Can we go home now?" You whine, hugging Eddie from behind. "Ready to go pumpkin?" "Mm, tired." "Okay. Oh, Steve said Owen's staying over." "If that's okay." "Yeah of course, as long as I don't catch y'all sneaking out again." "We won't." Eddie hated it when you snuck out, he always told you, "if you're going to leave, just go outta the front door." He hated not knowing if you were in or not, so he always just told you to go through the front door. "Alright kid, let's go."
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