Y/n's POV
We were pretty miserable that night.
We camped out in the woods, a hundred yards from the main road, in a marshy clearing that local kids had obviously been using for parties. The ground was littered with flattened soda cans and fast-food wrappers. I felt horrible looking at it. The pollution and litter irritating me in a deep way that I could not fully explain.
We'd taken some food and blankets from Aunty Em's, but we didn't dare light a fire to dry our damp clothes. The Furies and Medusa had provided enough excitement for one day. We didn't want to attract anything else.
We decided to sleep in shifts. I quickly offered to take the first which Percy contested. But I told him he could go second.
Annabeth curled up on the blankets and was snoring as soon as her head hit the ground. Grover fluttered with his flying shoes to the lowest bough of a tree. And Percy sat against the trunk with a blanket pulled over him. I glanced behind me to quickly see that neither of them had fallen asleep.
"You guys should sleep," I told them. "We've had a long day and we all need some rest."
Grover nodded as Percy spoke up.
"I'm not that tired."
I wanted to contest him more but didn't have the heart. Merely nodding as I turned back. Trying to get a bit more comfortable as I heard Grover sigh behind me.
"Doesn't it make you guys sad?"
I didn't have to ask him to know what he was talking about. That same disgusting feeling settling into my stomach as I turned back to the trash infested marsh.
"It's horrible." I replied.
"What's horrible?" Percy asked.
"Just look around Percy," Grover answered. "You can't walk ten feet without tripping on a piece of garbage. And the sky. You can't even see the stars. They've polluted the sky. This is a terrible time to be a satyr."
As he spoke, I reflected back on my child home. A calm quiet woodland cabin. A picture of peace and serenity. Nature and the earth at its purest form. Undisturbed by the taint of humankind. Well at least it used to be.
"Oh, yeah I guess you'd be an environmentalist." Percy replied.
I glared back at him. Grover joining in as I spoke.
"Percy, I don't think I have to tell you that this isn't good," I pointed to the mounds of trash in front of us. "We're killing the planet and everything on it. Like an infection. And people just choose to ignore it."
Grover quickly continued for me. "Y/n's right barely anyone cares. Humanities already destroyed so much. At this rate I'll never find Pan."
"Pam? Like the cooking spray?" Percy spoke in confusion.
"I thought that was spam." I added.
"Pan!" Grover cried indignantly. "P-A-N. The great god Pan! What do you think I want a searcher's license for?"
A strange breeze rustled through the clearing, temporarily overpowering the stink of trash and much. It brought the smell of berries and wildflowers and clear rainwater, things that might have once been in these woods. A feeling of comfort and familiarity warming body. It reminded me of home.
"Tell me about the search." Percy said.
Grover looked at Percy almost cautiously, as if he were afraid, he was just making fun. He turned towards me slightly with the same expression. But I urged him on.
"The God of Wild Places disappeared two thousand years ago," he told me. "A sailor off the coast of Ephesus heard a mysterious voice crying out from the shore, 'Tell them that great god Pan has died!" When humans heard the news, they believed it. They've been pillaging Pan's kingdom ever since. But for the satyrs, Pan was our lord and master. He protected us and the wild places of the earth. We refuse to believe that he died. In every generation, the bravest satyrs pledge their lives to finding Pan. They search the earth, exploring all the wildest places, hoping to find where he is hidden, and wake him from his sleep."
"And you want to search for him." I spoke.
"It's my life's dream," he said. "My father was a searcher. And my Uncle Ferdinand. . . the statue you guys saw back there-"
I winced as Percy spoke.
"Oh, right, sorry."
Grover shook his head. "Uncle Ferdinand knew the risks. So did my dad. But I'll succeed. I'll be the first searcher to return alive."
"Hang on-the first?"
"What do you mean the first!?" I added after Percy.
Grover took his reed pipes out of his pocket. "No searcher has ever come back. Once they set out, they disappear. They're never seen alive again."
"Not once in two thousand years?" Percy asked.
"No."
"And your dad? You have no idea what happened to him?"
"None."
"But you still want to go," I said amazed. "I mean, you really think you'll be the one to find Pan?"
"I have to believe that. Every searcher does. It's the only thing that keeps us from despair when we look at what humans have done to the world. I have to believe Pan can still be awakened."
I stared at the orange haze of the sky as I reflected over Grovers words. On a surface level it seemed irrational and akin to blind hope. But I found I understood how he felt. It was hard to accept the state of the world. And it felt hopeless to fight against that ever-downward spiral mankind was following. But I had to believe that humanity wasn't that one sided. That there were others that were willing to fight for our home.
I glanced back over at Percy who was leaning against the trunk. Contemplating as something seemed to occur to him.
"How are we going to get to the Underworld?" Percy asked, "I mean, what chance do we have against a god?"
"Little." I replied.
Grover shook his head. "It seems pretty bad. But back at Medusa's office. Annabeth was telling me-"
"Oh, I forgot. Annabeth will have a plan all figured out." Percy said in irritation.
"Don't be so hard on her, Percy. She's had a tough life, but she's a good person. After all she forgave me. . . ." His voice faltered.
"What do you mean?" Percy asked. "Forgave you for what?"
Suddenly Grover seemed very interested in playing notes on his pipes. It was definitely a touchy subject.
"Wait a minute," Percy said. "Your first keeper job was five years ago; Annabeth has been at camp five years. She wasn't. . . . I mean, your first assignment that went wrong-"
"Percy." I said starkly trying to get him to drop it. Glancing up at Grover as I saw him shift uncomfortably.
"I can't talk about it," he said, and his quivering lower lip suggested he'd start crying if Percy didn't shut up. I made sure to glare back at him to make sure he'd stay quiet. "But as I was saying, back at Medusa's, Annabeth and I agreed there's something strange going on with this quest. Something isn't what it seems."
"I mean I don't think I would describe this quest as particularly normal. It's a pretty unique situation to be honest," I gestured back towards Percy as I continued. "I mean we're being accused of stealing a thunderbolt that Hades took."
"That's not what I mean," Grover replied. "The Fur-The Kindly Ones were sort of holding back. Like Mrs. Dodds at Yancy Academy . . . why did she wait so long to try and kill Percy? Then on the bus, they just weren't as aggressive as they could've been."
"Well, I got thrown out the window of a moving bus. And had to earthbend may way out of getting a face full of monster talons. So, they seemed pretty aggressive to me."
"Earthbend?" Percy asked.
"Don't tell me you've never watched Avatar," I spoke. "Well now that I think about it, I guess vine manipulation would be more of a waterbending thing."
Percy didn't seem to know how to respond. I glanced over at Grover. Who was looking at me with a questioning look. "Uh. Anway's, something was definitely off back at the bus. They were screeching at us: 'Where is it? Where?'"
"Asking about me," Percy said. "Or maybe me." I quickly added on.
"Maybe . . . but Annabeth and I, we both got the feeling they weren't asking about a person. They seemed to be asking about an object."
"That doesn't make sense."
"I know. But if we've misunderstood something about this quest, and we only have nine days to find the master bolt. . . ." He looked between me and Percy like he was hoping for an answer.
I raced through my thoughts. Trying to reach some conclusion but failing to grasp any possibility. I looked over at Percy hoping he maybe had something. But he merely sighed as he opened his mouth to speak.
"I haven't been straight with you guys." he told us. "I don't care about the master bolt. I agreed to go to the Underworld so I could bring back my mother."
Grover blew a soft note on his pipes. "I know that Percy. But are you sure that's the only reason?"
"I'm not doing it to help my father. He doesn't care about me. I don't care about him." He quickly snapped back.
I gazed back at Percy questioningly. Grover doing the same from the branch above. "Look, Percy, I'm not as smart as Annabeth. I'm not as skilled as Y/n. And I'm not as brave as you. But I'm pretty good at reading emotions. You're glad your dad is alive. You feel good that he's claimed you, and part of you wants to make him proud. That's why you mailed Medusa's head to Olympus. You wanted him to notice what you'd done."
"Yeah? Well maybe satyr emotions work differently than human emotions. Because you're wrong. I don't care what he thinks."
I shifted a bit from where I was sitting. Turning back towards Percy as I spoke. "Come on Percy you can't deny what you're feeling. Be honest with yourself. No one will think less of you for it."
I was trying to sound comforting, but it only served to irritate him more. "I'm being perfectly honest with myself. I know exactly how I feel about my dad. And I don't need him in my life. I just want my mom back."
"Percy-"
But he cut me off as he spoke. "Don't keep trying to push this on me. Besides I'm not the only one that Zeus has his eyes on." I sighed in exasperation as I saw where Percy was bringing this. "So, how about it Grover? What do your emotion reading abilities say about Y/n?"
The satyr looked over at me a bit nervously as I tried to ease his concerns a bit. "It's okay Grover. Whatever you say I'll accept it. I won't take it personally."
He sighed as he began to reply. "Honestly Y/n it's a bit more complicated with you." I nodded waiting for him to elaborate. "You keep to yourself. Help when you can and pull your weight. And when you were asked to take on this quest you didn't miss a beat. But why did you?"
"Because I'm trying to clear my name. And if I don't then after Zeus blows Percy to kingdom come, I'll be the next in line."
Grover shook his head at my response. Percy's irritation already lifted as he glanced between me and Grover genuinely curious to see what the satyr had to say.
"No, I don't think that's it." I let out a deep breath as he continued. "You came because your scared."
"What?" I said.
"You didn't come to clear your name. You came because you hate what you think you carry with you. I mean you spent weeks traveling across the country, right? Monsters always on your heels not a moment to rest or recuperate. And despite everything you did the people you cared about were ripped away from you."
I took in a sharp shuddering breath.
"You mentioned a friend that gave you that knife. And the father you once had. You can speak and even joke about them. But you won't even dare discuss or think about what happened to them. Because Y/n your scared that it was your fault. That you were to blame. And even now that looms over you. And you hated it. You convinced yourself that just by staying at camp you would bring about our end. So, you took on this quest. A way to escape. Because you said you had to or else, we would be put in danger."
My breathing grew heavier as I tried to steady myself. That same horrible mocking presence clouding my mind as Grover continued.
"But you did it because you hated the quiet. The stillness of the camp. Nothing to do but think about what you might have done. What you thought you did. And this quest was an easy way to distract yourself. Because your scared. Not of the monsters that follow your steps. But of the monster you believe lies inside."
I gripped my head in my hands as I forced that darkness back down. Pushing it out of my head as I managed to calm down. Shuddering as a shiver ran up my back.
"Y/n?" Percy asked as a small sob escaped my mouth.
"I'm sorry Y/n. Really I didn't mean to push it that far. It was just. Percy asked me. And you said it would be fine. And I was just-"
I cut him off as I stood up from my sitting position. Snatching up a blanket as I walked past the tree containing Percy and Grover.
"I think I'm gonna rest now. You two can take first watch." And with that I stalked off into the woods. I saw Percy move to stop me but slowly recede. For some reason he knew when I needed to be alone. And right now, was one of those moments.
I sighed as I moved a few feet more into the woods. Setting up my blanket and lying down. Shifting around until I was somewhat comfortable. Gazing up at the polluted skies with the littered forest surrounding me. Listening to the slight chirping of the crickets as I dosed off to sleep. I just needed to be alone.
Percy's POV
Someone was shaking me.
My eyes opened, and it was daylight.
"Well Annabeth said, "the zombie lives."
I was trembling from the dream I could still feel the grip of the chasm monster around my chest. "How long was I asleep?"
"Long enough for me to cook breakfast." Annabeth tossed me a bag of nacho-flavored corn chips from Aunty Em's snack bar. "And Grover and Y/n went exploring. Look, they found a friend."
My eyes had trouble focusing.
Y/n was sitting down crossed legged on a blanket with Grover standing beside him. He seemed pretty calm and upbeat. Last night's tenuous talk seeming to have passed from his mind. In hindsight I felt kind of bad about asking Grover to give his read on Y/n's emotions.
I looked down gradually at Y/n's legs. Seeing something fuzzy in his lap, a dirty unnaturally pink stuffed animal.
No. It wasn't a stuffed animal. It was a pink poodle.
The poodle yapped at me suspiciously. Grover said, "No he's not." And it seemed to relax a bit as it continued to nuzzle against Y/n.
I blinked. "Are you . . . talking to that thing?"
The poodle growled.
"This thing," Grover warned. "is our ticket west. Be nice to him."
"You can talk to animals?"
Grover ignored the question. "Percy, meet Gladiola. Gladiola, Percy,"
I stared between Annabeth and Y/n figuring that one of them was about to burst out laughing at the practical joke they were pulling on me. But they both looked deadly serious.
"I'm not saying hello to a pink poodle," I said. "Forget it."
Annabeth snapped back at me in irritation. "Percy. Be polite."
Y/n quickly continuing for her. "If we both said hi to the poodle you can say hi to the poodle."
The poodle growled.
I said hello to the poodle.
Grover explained that he'd come across Gladiola in the woods, and they'd struck up a conversation. The poodle had run away from a rich local family, who'd posted a $200 reward for his return. Gladiola didn't really want to go back to his family, but he was willing to if it mean helping Grover. He also said Y/n smelled nice so that was apparently a plus too.
I blinked as I turned back towards Y/n who merely shrugged in response.
"How does Gladius know about the reward?" I asked.
"He read the signs," Grover said. "Duh."
"Of course." I said. "Silly me.:
"So, we return Gladiola," Y/n explained, "we get money, and we buy tickets to Los Angeles. Simple."
I thought about my dream-the whispering voices of the dead, the thing in the chasm, and my mother's face, shimmering as it dissolved into gold. All that might be waiting for me in the West.
"Not another bus," I said wanly.
"No." Annabeth agreed.
She pointed downhill, toward train tracks I hadn't been able to see last night in the dark. "There's an Amtrack station half a mile that way. According to Gladiola, the westbound train leave at noon."